The questions are many, but the answer is always the same. I am a gay man. I was born a gay man, and to deny it would be a denial of myself as a human being. The Boy Scouts of America won the right to discriminate. When I now look at recent world events, I don't see how the act of discrimination can play a part in the future of America. All forms of discrimination must be overcome.
Question Me An Answer
A Gay Opinion 7/17/00
by R.A. Melos
There was a point in my life when I had direction; when I knew what I wanted
and where I was heading. And then I came out of the womb.
Since that time I, like every other person on Earth, have wandered the emotional
deserts in search of my destiny. As a younger man I expected permanence. Everything
that happened not only effected my life, but left it's permanent marks on my
mind and soul, gently nudging me toward some great unseen destiny in the distant
future.
As time went on, instead of answering all my questions, I developed more questions.
Part of my questioning process was developed because of my closeted lifestyle.
Many of today's young homosexuals are reaching these answers much sooner than
I, and coming out in grade school and high school. These are the real movers
and shakers of our community, for they are accepting their birth right without
feeling the need to be closeted for a lifetime.
I say birth right because homosexuality is part of genetic design, like eye
and hair color, and not something you choose. Homosexuals may choose to live
a heterosexual lifestyle, but that doesn't change their genetics. The young
homosexuals of today are realizing this and accepting it at an early enough
age so they may not suffer the scares of closeted lies. I'm not saying their
lives are going to be any easier by accepting themselves at earlier ages, because
for every person who accepts themselves, there will be a person who wishes they
would disappear back into the closet.
The recent decision by the US Supreme Court to uphold the rights of the Boy
Scouts of America to be and exclusionary organization is appalling to many,
but it is the right decision. Based on the current laws of the land the BSA
has every right to discriminate. We, as homosexuals, and those who support the
rights of homosexuals, have the right to withdraw support of such organizations.
Since the Supreme Court had ruled in favor of the BSA, it is up to the individuals
who understand the consequences of this decision to make sure this private organization
receives no support from any public organization, including schools which operate
from your tax dollars. If the BSA wishes to have meetings, they are very welcome
to do so, but not on any property my tax dollars are helping to keep.
I urge the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered (GLBT) community and their
families and friends to take this stance, relegating the BSA to the very closet
in which they would sequester the GLBT community. Watch your townships, your
school systems, and voice your opinions when this group, and others like them,
are allowed to participate in anyway in anything funded by the public.
The message sent to the GLBT youth, by the Supreme Court, and by society in
general, is mixed. It tells us we, the GLBT, are acceptable, but private organizations
have the right to discriminate against us. Many private companies have recently
joined in offering benefits to same-sex partners, even though only one state
legally recognizes these relationships. This is a counter to balance the injustice
of our justice system.
All religions, not only Wicca, teach for every good action there is bad or for
every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. While the messages may
seem mixed, they are actually very timely, and balanced.
The BSA may now appear more like the Nazi youth groups of the late 1930's, with
which they now have more in common. However, this action will only help awaken
the homosexual youth to the injustices of the world at an earlier age, and make
more people who are accepting of themselves willing to make the commitment to
effect changes in the world, to help themselves to create a world in which they
will be comfortable.
I spent 30 years of my life floundering around, trying to understand who I was,
and more importantly, why I was what I am? It took Earth shaking events in my
life to awaken me to my own self-acceptance, for which I will always be grateful
to the man who helped me to see the world the way I do at this moment in my
life.
I have finally answered many of my own questions, and know that whatever I do
it will be out of truth, honesty, and a desire to make my world a place where
I am comfortable. I still have questions, but now they are not so much about
why I am me, but more about what I can do as an openly gay man to have a positive
effect on society?
The answer to this is obvious. I will live my life by my beliefs "harm
none, and do as you will," the Wiccan Rede. I will do that which pleases
me, and not hide it from the world. I will revel in the joys of the universe,
and in the pleasure I find in all things and on all levels of my life. I can
honestly say I am very happy with myself, and know my existence as an openly
gay male makes positive changes in a world where only a few years ago I felt
uncomfortable being what the universe intended me to be.
Myself, and every open and out person, makes the world a better place for people
who have been closeted far too long. Today's youth have already realized this,
and are adding their energy to this wonderful honesty. The world of closets
and lies, the place where self-doubt, confusion, and despair ruled, is coming
to an end. The changes are inevitable, and an era of self-truth and honesty
is dawning.
This truly is a new millennium; one of hope for the end of oppression inflicted,
and self-inflicted, upon the GLBT. The answers are there, we just have to ask
the right questions.