Here's the scenario: you're standing over what passes for "toilet"
in your third-world hostel studying something really important
like your Passport or that linguistics tip sheet you pulled off
the internet to keep you out of trouble with the locals when
you suddenly realize you've lost your grip and the tiny
paprus article is descending right into the bowl.
Your body grows rigid and a wave of cold blood flush through
your
previously useful fingers and down to the soles of your feet as
the stark reality of your new situation breaks big across your
cerebellum, you suddenly realize you've lost your grip and the tiny
paprus article is descending right into the bowl.
Here's the strange part. As the last, best chance not become
whored
in some Dekenzien sweatshop out of basic necessity, or worse,
arrested by whatever passes for local law enforcement and held
without bail in a sweat-soaked cell, naked and hungry, where
the only form of human contact are tours of locals who visit to
poke you through the bars with broom handles and sticks,passes
out of view into the abyssmal depths of the porcelean maw and
into oblivion, you begin madly studying each water soaked word;
memorizing each point-setting; each water-borne contour; each
sans-serif guide edge.
As the only existing "legitimate proof" of your foreign
residence
slowly slides out of view in the abyssmal porcelean maw and onward
into oblivion, you realize there are no computers in this country.
You're not even sure it has an embassy. You imagine the life of a
sweat-shop labourer sewing Kathy Lee originals deep in the jungle
primevil for your daily bread; or worse, incarceration by whatever
passes for local law enforcement and held without bail in some 6x6
sweat-soaked cage, naked and hungry, your only human contact are
locals come to poke you through the bars with sticks or broom handles.
Your last reasonably grounded memory is the sound of something
not
unlike the single ring of a bicycle bell. You've become completely
unhinged. You immediately drop to your knees and begin a painstaking
study of each drenched letter; each water-borne contour; each sans-serif
guide edge; each point setting.
Sound familiar? No, of course not, but with the new Toilet Dweller
font from the mouse of Angry Lush you can certainly pretend.
Whatever floats your boat, sicko.
Click
here to download Truetype Toilet Dweller for Mac.
Click
here to download Truetype Toilet Dweller for Windows.
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