Political Satire Cruise Missiles

Political Satire Cruise Missiles
Political satire cruise missiles are designed to hit you in the rear end and make you think of something else or deflect attention from the real issue. This has become the mother of fast humor to squelch the tide of boring news reports. President Clinton's Administration has more scandals than a house infested with cockroaches. This President is a satirical writers dream. Monica, Zipper-gate, and the endless personal bloppers that have surfaced never seem to stop. Writers from the right, left, or center will always have
	George has already told Saddam he plans to burn his ass with some cruise missiles (aka cigars). He has his thumb on the button to send more ciagrs into Iraq if he pisses him off in the no-fly zones again.
NEW ISSUE THE CONSERVATIVE MISSILES OF OCTOBER

		This is just the latest warhead being launched to hit poor folks in New York State. The dreaded Hillary Cruise Misses. This is not loaded with explosives only deception!

		Due to the rash of espionage at secure facilities around the country, Pres. Clinton has ordered the United Nations to protect our missile projects. These soldiers were brought in because they fight with the Chinese and as often as they can.

		In a related incident Vice Pres. Gore blew another fart at a high security missile silo which sent all the missile team on alert as they saw smoke and smelled putrid gas. Here the VP tells Tipper about his wild day. Please note that Tipper is laughing too, she knows this stinker all to well.

		Vice Pres. Gore in a special meeting in the Internet Defense Community was elected as the next warhead to be launched in time of war. It was a landslide vote as he carries more explosive power in his butt than most chemical warheads. The "click here" sign is to signal his new military defense policy, "One click - get sick".


BenSlob urges death of Yanks and Brits! Ben Laden reportly has called upon other Muslims to commit murder of Americans and Britons. However doctors in the United States and England determined that the Desert Rat has a jaw disorder (foul mouth). A medical suppository pictured above is being prepared to alleviate Laden's discomfort. Doctors informed us that suppositories are used only when access to the mouth is inaccessible. The millionaire of dirt was unavailable for comment as American aircrews were applying WD40 (lubricant) to the medical prescription (cruise missile).

		Presidential hopeless Al Gore blew a fart in the company of the President. To make matters worse he then told Pres. Clinton about his new pollution control policies for the year 2001 and his bid to get to the presidency. President Clinton laughed at these points and told him it was the last time they meet except for outdoors. Vice President Gore had so much fun we're told he had an messy accident in his pants doing his foul deed.

		Another idea recently floated was to use B-52's to spray the Northeast and kill the mosquitoes that plague costals areas using a lighter dose of Gores explosive gas. The military claims this is still to damaging to humans and pets!

		We polled millions of people to find anyone that the public would trust with our cruise missiles. It seems that Rodney Dangerfield and Jay Leno were the best. They can launch anything they desire with a perfect sense of timing. Rodney does have some unusual plans.

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We will always attempt to get you the latest news as it's breaking!
		Since there is so much today about what's wrong with the youth of today, I have brought some youngsters on board to help gather news items. They were not happy with the pay I was giving them!

	Rogues Page is Outrageous, He's always taking political shots!
		The Clinton Administration is shooting missiles at Microsoft, trying to dismantle them. Maybe Microsoft will be forced to move offshore!


		President Clinton said he was making plans after he leaves office to try and help college students. By giving them his personal attention.

No matter if it's a scud or scum, it will certainly hit it's target! These are the famous political satire cruise missiles. They just come in low and hit you in the butt.

For the holidays our staff was applying pressure to our sources to meet our deadline. We had to squeeze in all directions to confirm all reports. Most of our folks we talked to this last month were choked up about President Clintons impeachment. Please note our new photo editor (pictured center) is not just your run of the mill photo critic. She's new at the job but has a history of finding any rats. We thought she was the perfect candidate.