Dufus & Shirt...

...Eight Days A Week.

Having attended five of the six Large Endings Day events that he had managed to get a ticket for alone, Shirt was delighted when Dufus agreed to come with him to LE Day 8. Travelling down, Dufus managed to beat Shirt back to his home on the Friday night, and after a night of watching television quizzes, exchanging Christmas presents three weeks late, and in making a list of other upcoming signings and events, they turned in.

The next morning, Dufus’ car was loaded up with bags, including a case intended for CDs that displayed Dufus’ covers for signing perfectly. Shirt was surprised how quick the journey to the Slough hotel was when you didn’t have to catch trains into Central London and then out again. Save a near miss on the motorway, the journey was uneventful with ‘Survivors: Revelation’ playing quietly on the stereo whilst Dufus’ phone barked out directions (the initial ones relating to getting to the A3 being confusing). Finding the right lane for the underground car park under the hotel, they drove around for five minutes before settling on a space. There seemed to be no payment points, and so they gathered bags together, and followed the signs to reception. Upstairs they passed a payment machine but it did not seem to be working, and Reception staff indicated that they needed to pay on the way out.

They therefore queued for their convention packs, struggling to attach the wristbands around their wrists.

Shirt had forgotten to bring any cash with him, and so was directed to a cashpoint machine five minutes away by hotel staff, whilst Dufus waited in reception. However, on reaching the cash machine, it was out of cash, and the operatives refilling it seemed in no hurry to complete their task. Shirt therefore found another one (which charged for withdrawals), ringing Dufus to inform him of the delay and tell him to go into the Sylvester McCoy panel where he would meet him later.

Finally back at the hotel, Shirt paid for two photoshoots (getting another one free), having agreed with Dufus earlier which ones they would go for. Slipping into the panel room and a back row seat, Shirt was just in time to hear Sylvester say “I was in ‘The Hobbit’, you know”. Prior to Shirt’s arrival, Sylv had told a rather fruity tale about “Survival” and the heat affecting Cheetah People. Sylv kept moving about the panel room, neatly thwarting Dufus’ attempts to film him on his phone.

Panel completed and the two met up again, going out into the main signing area. Shirt took the opportunity to purchase a copy of ‘The Churchill Years’, his subscription copy having not arrived by the time that they had left (predictably it turned out later that had arrived just after they had gone), whilst Dufus scoured the racks of CDs for ones he wanted.

Initial purchases made, and having both been given another LE tote bag, they made their way to the first row of signing guests, both getting Lucy Briggs-Owen on the first episode of ‘The War Doctor: Only the Monstrous’.

Next up was Beth Chalmers who signed the same cover and various Sixth Doctor covers for Shirt, before Dufus got his ‘War Doctor’ cover signed.

“Get her in your ‘Companions’ book”, hissed Shirt.

Dufus therefore did so, getting a photo with her also, his camera’s batteries dying as per usual, meaning that his phone was pressed into service.

Next up, they queued for Barnaby Edwards, who signed a number of covers for Shirt, including two SH covers in which he appears as ‘Stapleton’. A quick photo taken by Dufus, and Shirt was moving off, whilst Dufus flicked through his album of covers, with Barnaby indicating which he had involvement with.

They then moved back into reception where two Seventh Galaxy guests were signing – Niky Wardley and Hugh Fraser. Shirt had purchased an autograph ticket for Hugh on the way, and put down a publicity photo of Poirot, Hastings & Japp for Hugh to sign (which Shirt had intended to try and get David Suchet to sign whilst he was in ‘The Importance of Being Earnest’ in London, but kept putting off). Photo signed, and Dufus was struggling for change to pay the steward by Hugh, with Shirt confusing matters by lending him a £10-note. Items signed, and Dufus bought some autograph vouchers for Niky, getting his ‘Companions’ book signed by her also, as well as a CD cover.

Following a quick check of the writers room and the one hosting Ian McNeice and Paul Darrow, Shirt was excited to see that Ian had come dressed as Churchill. They therefore went to the photoshoot desk to see if they could replace Lalla Ward with Ian McNeice, being told ‘No’. (In fact it turned out that no-one seemed to be paying any attention to the initials scribbled on the back of each photoshoot ticket, so they could have just swapped shoots). Dufus therefore bought Ian photoshoots for them both, adding a free John Leeson one for himself.

It was now time for the first of these photoshoots – Lalla Ward. Joining a medium length queue, they waited patiently, until after about five minutes the queue was moved to outside the studio, and soon they were stowing their bags and coats, and handing over their photoshoot tickets. Photos were being taken of attendees sitting down next to Lalla, and following two quick “One, two, three. Hold it a moment. Thank you very much”s they were moving off and returning to the main signing area. Dufus bought some more CDs, whilst Shirt managed to get Tim Treloar and James Joyce (having missed him at the Festival) to sign a few covers, before getting ‘man of many voices’, John Banks to sign another.

It was then time for Dufus to queue for his John Leeson photoshoot whilst Shirt popped in to get Ian McNeice on his ‘The Churchill Years’. On exiting, Dufus queued up for Ian and Paul Darrow, whilst Shirt checked the writers room again for Guy Adams, prolific Sherlockian scribe, without success and popped into the main signing area to get John Dorney to sign a few items.

On Dufus’ return, having reminded Mr. Darrow of his turn in ‘The Legend of Robin Hood’ and taken a photo of Ian as Churchill holding his box-set, they both entered the writers room.

Shirt made for the guests from ‘The Martian Chronicles’, selecting a copy of the newly released CD and paying its director for it. This signed by the writer (Richard Kurti) and director (Andrew Mark Sewell), Shirt got the former to sign a DVD cover of ‘Sherlock Holmes and the Baker Street Irregulars’ (featuring Jonathan Pryce as Holmes) which he co-wrote, and Andrew to sign two ‘Blake’s 7: The Early Years’ CD covers. A photo with Richard, taken by Dufus, and Shirt was moving off to get two of the stars, Dean Harris and the director’s young son to sign the CD also. A quick photo with Dean (he appears in a Cushing TV Holmes episode) and Shirt was doing the same for Dufus, with all the MC guests cramming around him for the photo.

On the other side of the room were Justin Richards and Andrew Smith, covers signed by both, and Shirt was getting Kai Owen to sign ‘Torchwood: Forgotten Lives’ with Dufus getting his copy of “Torchwood: Miracle Day” signed.

Dashing into the main signing area they managed to meet the lovely Lisa Bowerman, who asked after Chalky, and was gobsmacked when Shirt produced a programme for a production of ‘Confusions’ that he and Chalky had attended many years before.

“I designed that programme”, said Lisa, “I took all the little photos for the front cover”.

Lisa also became the first signature on Shirt’s ‘All Consuming Fire’ cover.

Next up was David Warner who signed Shirt’s ‘The Worlds of Large Endings’ cover, as well as his Series 7B poster, before waiting patiently for Dufus to turn his phone back on to take a photo of him with Shirt. (He’s one of LE’s Mycroft Holmes’).

Back in the photoshoot queue, and they were soon sitting next to Ian who was making a ‘V for Victory’ sign in all the photos.

Passing back through reception, the Lalla photos had been put out, along with those of John Leeson. Dufus’ one with John was clearly visible, but there was no sign of their photos with Lalla.

“They may not have been printed off yet”, commented the steward, advising them to check again later.

Dumping some items back in Dufus’ car, and seeing that Sylvester was on lunch, the two then decided to go down the road to get some lunch themselves, most other signers also being on lunch, and there being half-an-hour until their next two photoshoots.

Reaching the nearby newsagent five minutes later, they bought sandwiches and drinks, consuming them at the nearby bus stop.

Strolling back, there was still no sign of their Lalla photos, but their Ian photos were there.

They were therefore taken to the studio, who were adamant that they had printed them off, but after a few minutes decided to print them again just to get rid of Dufus and Shirt.

Exiting the studio, they were just in time to queue for Niky Wardley’s photoshoot. However, this time in both their cases, the photographer having checked the image took another one.

“You were great, it’s me that’s awful”, he joked.

Exiting the room, they immediately rejoined a queue for Hugh Fraser’s photoshoot, and ten minutes later were popping into the writers room to find several new writers there. Shirt therefore popped back to Dufus’ car, picking up a large bag of books.

The majority were for Guy Adams, who signed several LE covers (including ‘All Consuming Fire’ which he adapted) and then a guide to BBC’s ‘Sherlock’ and two Sherlockian novels. Guy was pleased with the cover design for one of the books – “Pig on a horse !!!” he proudly exclaimed.

Shirt then moved away to allow an impatient fan behind him to also meet Guy, returning two minutes later with two Sherlockian anthologies open at Guy’s stories. Dufus then took a photo of the two of them.

Dufus then got his ‘All Consuming Fire’ cover signed, admitting to Guy that he had been given one of his novels the night before (“Pig on a horse”) by Shirt but had forgotten to bring it with him.

Shirt meanwhile was getting James Goss and Cavan Scott to sign a few items, as well as Emma Reeves (author of ‘TW: Forgotten Lives’), and even found some more books for Justin Richards.

Returning to reception, via the car again for Shirt to drop off all his books, Sylvester was now back in his signing room, and signed Shirt’s ‘All Consuming Fire’ and two DVD covers for Dufus.

Back in the main signing room, and they made a beeline for Jacqueline Pearce, whose queue was the shortest that it had been all day. As they waited, Shirt pointed out Paul Morris to Dufus as he passed, with Dufus waylaying him to sign his ‘The Sixth Doctor: The Last Adventure’. Reaching the front of Jacqueline’s queue, LE covers of all vintages were signed, alongside Dufus’ B7 DVD, and they had met everyone that they had particularly wanted to. Shirt took the opportunity to get a few more items from Barnaby Edwards, as well as from Matt Fitton and Ken Bentley who were currently staffing the LE stall.

Entering the panel room, they were in time for the ‘Blakes’ 7’ panel in which both Paul Darrow and Jacqueline Pearce were in wicked form. There was a slight feeling of unease due to Paul’s suffering an aortic aneurysm during the previous year which had led to his legs being amputated and his being in a wheelchair. However, the other participants moved their chairs in front of the stage to be on his level.

“Excuse me if I don’t get up – I’m legless !!”, quipped Paul on his entrance.

The panel rattled along, with revelations including that Gan and Dayna are to be recast, and that LE are unable to do anything set in Series D.

Not wishing to stay for the Cosplay contest, they went back into the main signing area, where they queued up for Nicholas Briggs who was signing for a short time, three items per person. Shirt got his fourth signature on ‘All Consuming Fire’ (2 on each side of the cover due to the size of Sylvester’s signature) and on two other covers. Three covers signed for Dufus and he was getting a couple of covers signed by recast Third Doctor, Tim Treloar.

Dufus then bought some more ‘Companion Chronicles’ at the bargain price of £5 each. Having spent over £100 on the day, Dufus was given a free copy of the ‘Torchwood: First Born’ book by James Goss.

Re-entering the panel room and they were at the end of a ‘Torchwood’ panel. This completed, and Dufus managed to grab James Goss to get him to sign his newly acquired book.

The final panel was in relation to New Series DW ranges – with ‘The Churchill Years’, ‘UNIT’ and ‘The Tenth Doctor Adventures’ represented (the latter by Niky Wardley who guest stars with her old friend, Ms. Tate).

This completed, Shirt managed to get Phil Mulryne to sign two covers, before they made their way into reception, paying for their parking, and getting a token for the barrier.

Finding the exit quite easily, lining the grooves on the token with the slots on the machine’s token slot proved to be slightly more difficult, but they were soon retracing their earlier steps with a slight change at the end.

The evening was spent in watching television and eating a takeaway pizza, whilst musing on another quality adventure.

[PL]