Driven To Drink
.
Val Harrison, The Sergeant, of Stolen Property,
Was shopping up at Oakridge, to see what
she could see.
Her hair had been all nicely styled, she
had her evening gown,
All safely locked up in her van, she was
set to paint the town.
.
Shopping done, her chores complete, lots
of time to spare,
She went down to the parking lot, to get
her van from there.
Imagine the surprise she got, to find an
empty spot,
The place where it was nicely parked, the
van just now was not.
.
She quickly found a phone booth, dialed up
9-1-1,
My van has just been stolen, the thieves
are on the run.
Information taken, and put down on the form,
Val then went to spice it up, make those
crooks start feeling warm.
.
A bottle of the finest, whatever you should
choose,
The reward that she had posted, and quickly
spread the news.
Hal Hamilton, the dog man, thought he'd take
a look around,
To see if he could find it, and run the crooks
to ground.
.
He went up to the parking lot, to take a
look for clues,
Surely there was something left, he could
really use.
When he got up to the place, what before
his eyes,
The "stolen" van was sitting there,
imagine his surprise.
.
It seems that Sergeant Harrison, forgot where
she did park,
The van sat there securely, from afternoon
till dark.
The reward that she had posted, with Val
feeling kind of dumb,
Hal's sitting back enjoying, his favourite
brand of rum.
.
PC 664 T.J. Gowdyk 95-11-14 (128)
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