Ernie Writes Another Story

performed by Ernie (Jim Henson) and Bert (Frank Oz)

Ernie is at the typewriter, pecking away. Suddenly--

Ernie: "It's done! It's done! Hey Bert--it's done!"

Bert: "What? What's done?"

Ernie: "My story--greatest short story in the whole wide world, it's done. Greatest story in the world, wait'll you hear it."

Bert: (groan) "Go ahead."

Ernie: "A........B, C.......D......"

Bert: "Ernie....."

Ernie: "E, F,.....G...."

Bert: "Ernie, that's the alphabet!"

Ernie: "Now comes the sad part. (begins to cry) "H...I, J, K....." "

Bert: "Ernie......"

Ernie: ".......L, M, N, O...................P"

Bert: "Oh, Ernie!" (shaking his head)

Ernie: "Now comes the action part! (reads excitedly) "Q! R, S! T! U, V!" "

Bert just groans

Ernie: "Here comes the wind-up--"W, X, Y--" "

Suddenly Ernie begins to roll up the paper. Berts turns to him.

Bert: "Well?"

Ernie: "Well what?"

Bert: "Well go on, finish it. You went, "T, U, V, W, X, Y," and then you stopped. Go on, finish the story."

Ernie: "And tell you how it ends? Then you'll never want to read it for yourself!"

(Laughs and goes off)

Bert: "Sighhhhhhhhhhhh......"

Transcribed by Mrs. Mishima