Set It Free

Allura had been drifting somewhere between wake and sleep for the last hour. She’d never been so warm, or so comfortable, in her entire life. The night had been perfect, almost that it seemed unreal. She would wake up any moment to find that she was alone in her own bed, and that everything had been a dream. But as she felt a cool wind sweep through her hair, she knew the painfully truth of reality.

The evening sky that had been so beautiful had all but faded away. Shadows were starting to fall, and the sun was just reaching the horizon. Her real-life dream was about to become a cruel nightmare. If only there was one more day. If she didn’t move, maybe he wouldn’t wake up. He would miss the ship…

But Allura knew he wasn’t sleeping, even as she felt the even rise and fall of his chest behind her.

Warm breath caressed the cool skin of her neck . “Good morning.”

“Is it?” She turned to face him.

How could he really answer that? This was to be the day the Voltron Force left Arus - permanently. They weren’t even the Voltron Force anymore. Back to being ordinary space explorers. Their mission had been a success, and it was time to move on. He was a soldier, an officer who followed orders. Commander Keith didn’t have the luxuries that others had. He would never know a permanent home, and he could definitely never fall in love.

What have I done?

Keith’s moods never escaped Allura, and right now, she could almost hear the look he was giving her; it was one of reluctant regret.

She wanted to run…cry…hide. But she would do none of these. This was not the time for selfish sentiment, or even more selfish action. The Princess of Arus had an important duty to perform today, and it was one that she would be honored to carry out. They deserved a dignified send-off. Wearing pain on her sleeve would only serve to make things harder on everyone. When it was done, she could find somewhere to be alone with her sadness. But not now. Not yet.

She offered a weak smile. “What time is it?”

“Time to go,” he replied, his expression mirroring the woman’s opposite him.

Something strange happened just then.

The birds, who’d been singing a happy tune to greet the morning, had suddenly gone quiet. The rising sun had all at once become blinding…unbearably hot, and the skin on her arms that had been cooled through the night by the dark, night winds, instantly went numb. It was as if someone put a glass box around her, and threw away the key. Allura had felt physically sick about this day for weeks, but suddenly, she could no longer feel the pain. She couldn’t feel anything.

They sat for a brief moment. Both were looking at the other, but the stares went right through. It was more than any human heart could bare to watch. At that very moment, Allura almost thought that she could hear something inside her break.

Keith stood, but his expression remained the same. “Allura, we should take the maintenance tunnels under the castle. I don’t feel like doing any explaining today, and truthfully…it’s really no one’s business.” He was speaking of their unknown whereabouts.

Allura reluctantly took hold of his outstretched arm to let him help her stand. “Probably a good idea.” The last thing Allura needed today was a lecture from Nanny.

Keith’s mind volleyed frantically for something to say, some rights words to make the situation better. But, there were no perfect words. “Allura…should we say good-bye now? I mean, with everyone…and Koran…I’m not sure…”

Hearing him say that was almost too much. ‘Good-bye? Is this what this was to him?’

“Commander, it will be a cold day in hell before I ever say ‘good-bye’ to you. What we’re going to do is make like this is just a long trip or something. We’ll see each other.” She took firm hold of his arms. “I’ve never been to Earth, and there’s vacations.” She stopped. It was bullshit, and they both knew it. But bullshit is what you sometimes have to resort to in order to get through certain rotten times in life, times like these.

Keith pulled her into his arms, just as he’d done the night before.

She let herself melt into the embrace. He’d always given her such a sense of peace, even when there was none. How was she going to trick herself into feeling that kind of peace again? She wrapped her arms around him even tighter.

“Time to go.”

* * * * * * * * * *

They had gotten back to the castle undetected with only a half-hour to spare. The time gave Allura the chance to shower and make it seem as though she hadn’t been up all night. For a moment, she almost felt guilty, wondering if Keith had had the time to pack. But then again, he was Keith - of course he was already packed.

It was a quarter to six as she made her way to the landing platform. Drawing near, she could hear the quiet hum of a ship’s engine.br>

Allura took a deep breath and exited the side door that led directly to the main docking bay. Everyone was there, even Romelle and Sven. There was a silence in the bay that Allura didn’t like - the silence of sadness.

“Sorry I’m late, everybody…got a little confused. Someone forgot to tell me that lion practice was cancelled today.”

Chuckles broke the silence, which seemed to lighten the mood a bit.

Allura shifted to Princess-mode for a moment, and tried to think of something to say. What could she say that would be worthy of a moment like this? They had saved her planet, her life, and everything she’d ever known. It was beyond words. Luckily, before she could open her mouth, Lance stepped forward. He held up his hand to stop her from speaking.

“Princess, earlier this morning, we all decided not to make this harder than it is already. We lived this thing together, and nothing else can be said about it. We’ll hug, but that’s all. No words. No good-byes.”

Allura was relieved, but still…she couldn’t just leave it like this. They deserved better.

She nodded, but proceeded to look each directly in the eyes. That morning, Allura would be the last one to say anything. She cleared her throat and began.

“There is nothing to say about what you’ve done. Your bravery and selflessness are beyond anything words would do it justice. You have saved my people and my planet. We are forever grateful to you. And please remember, Arus will always be your home. You can always come back, no questions asked.” Allura took a thoughtful pause and continued. “As a Princess and a pilot, I can tell you that it was the honor of a lifetime to work with you. But as a friend…I think that I’ll never know a group of finer people. I love each and every one of you.”

There was a heavy silence, but each member took their turn, hugging the princess and saying brief good-byes to the others. Each had made their way up the platform and disappeared into the ship. Only one remained in the docking bay.

Keith didn’t say anything. He simply handed her a slip of paper and took a step back. He paused for a moment and fell to one knee. The Alliance Commander took hold of one small hand and kissed it, just as he had that very first day. The moment lasted only a second. He stood, took a quick look in Koran’s direction, and headed up the platform, disappearing into the ship.

And just like that, he was gone.

As the ship became small in the distant sky, the remaining strength in Allura’s legs left her, and her knees buckled. Sitting on her pretty pink dress, she noticed the folded piece of paper he’d given her just moments ago, still clutched tightly in her hand. Carefully, she unfolded it.

It read: If you ever need me…or even if you don’t. It was followed by a contact number. But Allura noticed something else. Written in small handwriting below the number was written, ‘I left something for you. Look in my room..’

Allura stared at the note, reading it over and again. She sat for a moment, looked back to the empty sky, and let her mind go blank. In her short life, Allura had seen more sadness than most would ever know. She had lived an existence surrounded by war, grief, and death. She had often cried for her planet, her people, and those she’d lost. But on this particular morning, the tears wouldn’t come. That would mean that she had a heart, and hers was broken.

* * * * * * * * * *

As the planet Arus faded from view, the space explorers watched their pasts drift into the blackness of space. With Voltron, they would often travel great distances from Arus, but they had always known that they were coming back. This trip was different; they were headed for a new life.

Earth would seem foreign now. Life on Arus, aside from the war, was relatively simple. The people never cared too much for the modern day conveniences of Earth life. Save for the castle, there was no radio, person to person communication, television, or motorized transportation. They had the ability to create these things, but they didn’t have the desire. For the most part, the people had been content to lead peaceful, simple lives. The lifestyle had seemed a little strange to Keith at first, but he soon became comfortable with it; he even admired it. It sometimes seems that the more people have, the more they want. Maybe the Arusian people knew something others didn’t.

Pidge watched the others’ expressions with concern. He had been upset about leaving, too, but he was also a little excited. He had a brother waiting for him back on Earth, and it had been a while since he’d seen him. The Voltron Force was his family too, but there was just something about having Chip around that brought Pidge comfort. Blood ties are important to everyone, and as far as Pidge knew, Chip was his last living relative. He was looking forward to spending some time with family again.

The long faces of his counterparts wouldn’t do for the entire two day trip it would take to get to Earth, so the young Pidge spoke up. “You know, Hunk - I heard that a new Happy Burger opened up next to Garrison Center.”

Hunk raised an eyebrow. “Oh really? Happy Burger, huh? Hmmm… Well, there’s something to look forward to.”

“And Lance, just think of all the video games that have come out since we left.”

Lance could see what Pidge was trying to do. “Video games, huh?” Lance flashed a look in Hunk’s direction.

Thinking this could be the start of something, Pidge turned to Keith. “Keith…um…think of all the…and then there’s…you could…” Pidge continued on only because he noticed the mildly amused expression on his commander’s face. “Well, at least there’s always beer!”

That brought a laugh. All but Keith were chanting, “Beer! Beer! Beer!”

One of the ship’s crewmen had been passing by, and popped his head in. He was young and obviously intimidated with this very important assignment in helping to transport the Voltron Force back to Earth. The young man looked around cautiously. “Did I hear someone calling for beer? Um, no one told me to bring any. The orders had specified to bring rations, but no beer. We can arrange for a stop if…”

By this time, everyone had started to laugh uncontrollably.

Lance stopped long enough to dismiss the young officer with a salute. Thank you anyway, Private, but we were merely joking around with one another.”

The young crewman was obviously embarrassed, but he nodded and left, closing the door behind him.

Pidge had succeeded in getting their minds off the situation, temporarily. The Voltron Force began talking about Earth and what everyone was going to do when they got back. Only one of the members seemed content to just sit back and watch his friends.

Keith looked at each of his teammates with reserved heart. Only two weeks ago, he’d been notified that the team was going to be dissolved shortly after their arrival on Earth. Their particular group was a military one, and in peacetime, military operations were given other things to do. Fresh teams were graduating from the Academy, doing the job they’d done long before they ever went to Arus. The Voltron Force’s talents were going to be needed “elsewhere.” Unfortunately, Keith knew exactly what that meant. The leaders of the Galaxy Garrison would make a big event of their return. They would have dinners to attend, meetings to go to, and babies to kiss. They were going to be paraded around like some carnival act. At least that’s the way Keith saw it.

The decision to tell the team about its dissolution was his, and he’d chosen to wait. Keith didn’t want to make the situation any worse that it had to be. He would allow them a few days of rest after they arrived on Earth before breaking the news. Keith was saddened about the breakup of the team, but his thoughts were elsewhere at the moment.

He started to think back to the events of the night before. Should he have kissed her? It was too late for that now. Besides, he’d never felt like that before in his life. At the time, he wasn’t really thinking about it. He didn’t pay any attention to the fact that they were leaving the next day, that she was a princess, or that he was her captain. All he remembered was thinking of how beautiful she was and that look on her face when she was telling him those beautiful things. It had been irresistible. He wanted to reach out and touch it, if just for a moment. It was one single moment of Heaven after three years of utter Hell. He couldn’t feel guilty about it. He couldn’t. His only regret came after a long pause of wondering what she was doing at the exact moment he was thinking of her.

Keith could never deal with those times when Allura had been upset. Even when he’d been the cause of her unhappiness, and she deserved it. Those moments had broken his heart. Her happiness was his, and he began to wonder what kind of life he would find without that working for him. For the past three years, his life had a purpose. Now, he found himself alone, again, with only his work to live for and a title that was quickly becoming a burden. If only things had been different.

His team had obviously noticed his change of mood; they were all staring at him. Clearing his throat, he stood to leave.

“I need to make contact with Marshall Graham. They need to know our approximate arrival time. Be ready for a big welcome, guys. Hope you like attention.”

Keith turned his back on the room, feeling eyes on his back until he’d closed the door.

Lance turned to meet the quizzical expressions of his two friends. “He’s fine. He’s had a lot to deal with today. More than the rest of us.”

Lance sat back. He’d long since calmed down after his exchange with Keith on the dance floor, but yet, he couldn’t help but be slightly annoyed that the both of them had all but disappeared without telling anyone where they’d be. He had had to make up an excuse when approached by Nanny and Coran - some lame story about Allura having a headache and Keith seeing her to bed. It was weak, but it was the only thing he could conjure up on the spot. But they weren’t in her room, or his, for that matter. Lance had checked more than once. Motivated partially by jealousy, maybe, but it was something more.

Unbeknownst to anyone, Lance had checked on his team before going to bed…every night. Usually, only Keith was still up when Lance headed off to his room, but as long as he knew they were all safe, he could relax enough to sleep. Last night, he didn’t sleep at all. Keith and Allura were unaccounted for.

Keith was Lance’s dearest friend. He was a brother, actually. All the while they were growing up together at the Academy, Lance always had to settle for being second or third best, behind Keith. Keith was always just a little better at everything, but Lance never really minded. He was happy for his friend’s accomplishments. He’d never been jealous of anything Keith ever had. That is, until now.

It was difficult for Lance to leave Arus the way he did. He wanted so badly to tell her something…anything. But there were people around. ‘And who knows what happened last night?’ Lance quickly put the thought out of his mind.

At least things between him and Keith seemed to have settled. He would tell Keith later about Allura’s plan to make him jealous; it would put the issue to rest that there was nothing between him and Allura. Nothing at all.

Lance pulled a notebook out of his bag and began to write. ‘Dear Allura…’

Keith found his way to the front of the ship, where the communication link was. The room was empty, which was convenient. Keith just needed a few seconds alone. He punched in the personal code for Space Marshall Graham and waited for an answer. Keith didn’t expect to find him at home, but he would leave a message. Keith was still a little surprised that Marshall Graham had given him use of his personal number. He was a good man that way.

The transmission connected. A picture of a graying man appeared on the screen. He looked tired, but his expression lightened a little when he saw who was on the other end of the communication.

“Well, Commander Keith! Hello. This is a pleasant surprise. What can I do for you?”

Keith regarded the aging man with affection. He’d heard rumors of the Marshall’s retirement but didn’t want to believe it. Keith was conservative with who he trusted, and he trusted this man completely. The Garrison wouldn’t be the same without him.

“Hello, Marshall Graham. Just thought I’d check in for now. We left Arus about 30 minutes ago.”

Marshall Graham’s expression changed to one of mild interest. “Thank you, Commander…but you didn’t have to call me for that.”

Keith paused.

“Keith, is there something else I can do for you?”

“Actually, Marshall Graham…there is. Since the team will be dissolving shortly, I was just wondering…where I’ll be focusing my efforts from now on.”

The Marshall’s expression relaxed. “Well, Keith, that really hasn’t been decided yet. Do you, maybe, have any ideas?”

“Um, Sir? Do you have any positions out here…in the Denubian Galaxy? Maybe something? I really don’t care what.”

It took the Marshall only a second to figure out that something was going that he didn’t fully understand. This wasn’t like Keith at all, but he trusted that there was good reason behind this sudden request. He’d known Keith since the day he was born, and this was the first time he’d ever asked for anything.

The Marshall thought for a moment. “Commander? How do you feel about the environmental sciences?”

* * * * * * * * * *

After what must have been an hour, Allura managed to gather the strength to stand. She didn’t really know what to do with the rest of her day now (or the rest of her life, for that matter), but she couldn’t just sit there forever.

She turned to leave when she noticed Coran. He was sitting on a metal ledge just outside the castle entrance, elbows propped up on his knees, head down. He seemed to sense her coming because he raised his eyes.

Her old friend offered a smile. She smiled back.

No matter what, Coran had always been there. People had come and gone, but he was always there, her rock. Allura was unable to fathom a time that he wouldn’t be there with that smile, that look of conveyed strength and encouragement. But she knew the years were taking their toll on him; she could see it in his eyes.

“So, Coran, I guess it’s just you and me again.” She tried to make it light hearted, but it came out sounding dreadful.

Coran rose to his feet and rested his hands upon her shoulders. “Allura, there’s a saying that goes something to the effect, ‘If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it was truly meant to be.’ Maybe those can be some words to live by for a while.”

Allura thought about the words for a moment. “Coran, it’s obvious that whoever said that…never met Keith.” With that, she kissed his cheek and made for the castle entrance.

Making her way through the castle halls, she debated whether she should go see what Keith had left her…or wait until later. For one thing, she didn’t really want to see his empty room. For another, if she were to go in, there would be nothing else after that. It would be over. She stopped debating when she found herself walking down the corridor leading to his chambers.

Keith’s room was only a short distance from hers. It hadn’t been that way when the Force first arrived though. The boys rooms had been put in an entirely different section of the castle because it wasn’t considered “proper” for them to share the same space. But after one or two unwelcome visits from Lotor, everyone was moved into the same hallway. This actually made Allura feel much safer, although she had never admitted it.

As if on instinct, she raised her hand to knock. It was going to take a little while. She opened the door and walked in.

Allura took a quick glance around the room. She’d never been in Keith’s room much, but she could tell that it was empty, save for a few books he’d left. The bed had been made. But then again, he hadn’t slept in it. But that made Allura remember something that Nanny had mentioned a while back. She told her that Keith always made his bed in the morning. Nanny said that she’d frequently reminded him that she would be more than happy to take care of it for him, he had insisted that she had better things to do than take care of him. Allura could tell that Nanny liked Keith, perhaps just a little more than the others.

Although the bed was made, the pillow looked as if he’d rested on it. Next to it, there sat a carefully placed box. It was blue, tied with a pink ribbon. Allura thought about the color scheme and chuckled.

She picked up the box and gently tugged one end of the perfect pink bow. The ribbon tore away easily. She sat down on the bed and lifted the lid from the box. Inside, was a small gold locket. It was plain, with the small letter ‘A’ engraved on the front. Allura slowly pulled the locket from the box. The necklace was so delicate, and yet, almost too heavy for it’s size. It sparkled in the sunshine coming in from the window, and Allura decided right there that it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. There was a tiny latch on the side, and with care, she flipped it. Suddenly, the breath caught in her throat.

On one side, there was a picture of the two of them together. Allura recognized it. It was the one taken by Lance that afternoon in Wyles. She’d fallen from the bench and Keith caught her.

Allura stared at the picture. They weren’t even looking at the camera. They were looking at each other, smiling. Allura remembered how embarrassed she’d been then, being so close to Keith. It had only been days ago, but so much had happened since then. Now she would do anything to be the girl in the picture again.

There was a small inscription on the other side of the locket. It read:

For my dear Allura.
Love, Keith

She fastened the locket around her neck, picked up the little blue box and Keith’s pillow, and went back to her room to take a long nap.

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