October
1991-1993
The
Seed of Evil
When
I first met Mari, (in January 1989) she was very warm hearted, and exciting to talk to.
She started touching me in January 1989 the very first time I spend the night at my friend’s house. I was 15 and this went on for almost two years. That morning
My old friend was outside washing the van while I was inside playing Nintendo games.
Then Mari came in the room and sat next to me. She grabbed the extra controller
and threw it in between my thighs right below my genitals and soon after reached to grab the controller. I didn’t think anything of it the first time she did it but she did it four to five times after that. Each time the controller hit me, it got closer and closer to my genitals and she threw
her hand in between my thighs. After several attempts she stopped throwing the
controller and just put her hand on my thigh, moving it in circles each circle progressing towards my genitals. Then she grabbed
my hand and put my hand on her body moving it the way she wanted to be touched.
I'm having a hard time remembering the exact years, so I’ll estimate. It
was the second semester of my sophomore had the same English class as her brother. I was 15 when I met her at the end of January because the second semester didn’t start until mid
January. Soon after I had seen him in my class I spend the night at his house.
She had a birthday in March and a month later I turned 16. I remember the
following Christmas when My old friend was joking about Mari liking me (it wasn't malicious but playful; he even pushed her
at me several times after turning off the light.) During that time I also met
a cousin of theirs, Michelle, which My old friend told me Mari acts just like her (“A carbon copy” he would say). 1989 went by and on her birthday (1990) I gave her a puppy. A month later I turned 17. That year I went to San Francisco
on the school trip. When I came back I was convinced to tell her how I felt about her.
After much debate on whether to let her and lose as a friend or keep it all inside, I started letting her know that
I liked her more than just friends. I knew that My old friend knew he had little
or nothing to say on whom Mari dates; unfortunately she seems to think that she can stick her hand down her brother's friend's
pants and play with his genitals. September, October and most of November (1990) were the last months of the touching.
Come
January 1991 would have been two years since she started touching me and I turned 18 in April.
From the first day she touched me, she would touch me in her brother's room. She touched me anywhere, under
covers while watching television (in the presence of others), in the back seat of the van while going to “grandma's
house” and the mall on Saturdays, in her own room under the guise of her with her homework and last but not least putting
my hand on her body usually abdomen, back, her thighs and butt.
I
remember when Mari, My old friend and their parents went to the movies. On the
way to the movies I sat in the back of the van which is where I usually sat and Mari came back to sit next to me. I was leaning back and Mari's hand dove in between my thighs and she pinched my penis. The van wasn't the
only place, she would also touch me at her cousins' birthday parties, other parties and later at night after My old friend
would fall asleep she would sit next to me or on top of me and we would touch each other (again, she would allow me to touch
her by placing my hand on her body). Although I think her favorite way to get me alone with her was to watch "The Newly Wed
Game" and "Love Connection." The Saturdays, I mentioned earlier, my friend would
sit in the passenger seat which would mean that I would end up sitting next to her and being touched (she would place her
hand on the place I would sit right before I sat, [this is] what happened on the way to grandma's house. Usually we would take her (the grandmother) to the mall. I
remember thinking that she must like me, otherwise why would she be doing this?
Yes, I touched
her too. Basically I touched her where she touched me but only after she put
my hand there. I know that's not an excuse.
I loved her and thought that she at least like me too. I know now that
she never liked me no matter how much she tried or will try to convince me that is not true.
I will not believe her! I did not sexually abuse her; I am the one who is hurting.
She could care less about me. She even admitted being a "bitch" and saying,
"it's too bad that you got hurt". She also said in a note that she placed in
my mailbox that “it’s over" what's over? This is what she wrote:
"Look, everyone knows what happen- give it
up. It's over. You're wasting your
time writing me all these letters. You've accomplished what you wanted to- everyone
knows and that's the end of your story."
[That wasn't
true. Even though she blamed me at the end, like she threatened, she didn't annouce it to her parents, not even her
brother. She blamed me in secret, just like the whole situation, calling me names and telling me that no one wanted
me around. My mother didn't even know for the longest time. Mari didn't tell everyone; is she afraid of the truth?]
