Sounds |
Sounds |
Homer
J. Simpson (incl. mmm's)
Main
Simpsons page (Abe to Willie, incl. songs, links)
| Brewcrew's Homerpage | Other wavs | Autos, Trucks/4x4 | Music/Bon Jovi | Nasa/Space |
Chief Clancy Wiggum| File
Name |
Description | Size |
| 555 | Wiggum: "Eddie, did you trace the phone number?"
Eddie: "Sure did, Chief" Wiggum: "Five-five-five, oh geez, that's gotta be phony" |
157k |
| 912 | "Ah, no you got the wrong number, this is 91...2" | 30k |
| aquarium | Lou: "There's a couple of guys fighting at the aquarium, Chief"
Wiggum: "They still sell those frozen bananas?" Lou: "Yeah, I think so" Wiggum: "Let's roll" |
63k |
| arrest | "Hey, hi, can I arrest any of you people for anything?" | 75k |
| baby | "No jury in the world's gonna convict a baby. Mmm, maybe Texas" | 51k |
| bookemlu | "Book 'em, Lou!" | 7k |
| bribe | Wiggum: " -sigh- Listen carefully and watch me wink as I speak,
ok?" Homer: "ok"
Wiggum: "The guy I'm really looking for, wink, is Mr. Bribe, wink, wink" Homer: ".........It's a ring toss game" Wiggum: "That's it, I'm shutting this game down" |
163k |
| closet | "You know you're not supposed to go in there. What is the fascination with my forbidden closet of mystery?" | 52k |
| comeout | "All right! Come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says Capricorn and something with coconut on it" | 261k |
| court | "See you in court Simpson! Oh and ah bring that evidence with you, otherwise I got no case and you'll go scott free, ya know?" | 148k |
| cuffem | Wiggum: "Cuff 'em boys, we're puttin' this dirt bag away"
Snake: "Ha! I'll be on the streets in 24 hours" Wiggum: "We'll try and make it 12" |
85k |
| dedicate | Quimby: "Alright, I'm in charge here"
Wiggum: "Oh, run along, Quimby. I think they're dedicating a phone booth somewhere" |
120k |
| doa | (ringing phone) Marge: "Hello?"
Wiggum: "Ah yeah Mrs Simpson, I have some bad news, your husband was found DOA" Marge: "Oh my God he's dead!!?" Wiggum: "Oh wait I mean DWI..hahaha..I always get those two mixed up" (hangs up...footsteps). Lady: "Hello, my name is Mrs. Phillips you said my husband is DWI" Wiggum: "Ahhhhhhh.......why don't you talk to that officer over there, I'm goin' out to lunch". |
562k |
| dusting | Marge: "Chief! You're getting powdered sugar all over my floor"
Wiggum: "No I'm not, no I'm not. I'm, uh, dusting for prints" |
84k |
| egghead | Guy: "Here is an ordinary square"
Wiggum: "Woah, woah slow down egghead" |
88k |
| emerg911 | "If anything goes wrong, just dial 9-1-1. Unless it's an emergency" | 118k |
| explode | Lou: "That sounded like an explosion at the old Simpson place?"
Wiggum: "Forget it, that's two blocks away" Lou: "Looks like there's beer coming out of the chimney" Wiggum: "I am proceeding on foot. Call in a code-8" Lou: "We need pretzels, repeat pretzels!" |
153k |
| greek | *gasp* "Good Lord!"
Wiggum: "Put out an A.P.B on a Ustwes R. Dewo. Ah, better start with Greektown" Investigator: "That's Homer J. Simpson, Chief. You're reading it upside down" Wiggum: "Uh, cancel that A.P.B. But, uh, oh, bring back some of them, ah, gyros" Investigator: "Chief, you're talking into your wallet" |
220k |
| illbedmn | TV static, beep, chief moans, announcer: "Your cable TV is experiencing
difficulties, please do not panic, resist the temptation to read or talk
to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations as years of TV radiation
have left your genitals withered and useless"
Wiggum: -Checks under covers- "Well, I'll be damned" |
211k |
| jebediah | Wiggum: "Jebediah Springfield has been replaced by a skeleton!"
Historian: "No, that's the skeleton of Jebediah" Wiggum: "Gotcha, gotcha" |
68k |
| kidsays | Bart: "Take 'em away, boys!"
Wiggum: "Hey, I'm the Chief here. Bake 'em away, toys!" Lou: "What'd you say Chief?" Wiggum: "Do what the kid says" |
174k |
| lou | Lou: "Cecil just voluntarily confessed, Chief"
Wiggum: "Well, that's some nice work, Lou. You'll make Sargeant for this" Lou: "Ah, I already am Sargeant, Chief" Wiggum: "Perhaps you are. But I say Bob goes back to jail" Sideshow Bob: "But surely! I mean...I..caught Cecil" Wiggum: "Maybe so, but Lou here says you were resisting arrest" Lou: "No I didn't, Chief" Wiggum: "Quiet Lou, or I will bust you down to Sargeant so fast it'll make your head spin" |
180k |
| margcop | -knocking- Marge: "Excuse me"
Wiggum: "What, what, what, what, what, what what, what! This better be about pizza!" Marge: "Actually, I'm interested in becoming a police officer" -lots of laughing- |
147k |
| nicework | "That's nice work, boys" | 17k |
| nobribe | Homer: "Carnies took over our house, you gotta help us!"
Wiggum: "Well, well, look who's here, Mr. Nobribe, sure we'll help ya, just sit down and wait for Detective Like I. Giveadamn!" Homer: "Thank you so much" |
105k |
| nolock | Wiggum: "These prestigious wrought iron security gates are bulletproof,
bombproof, and battering ram resistant, now"
Skinner: "Then what happened to Johnny D?" Wiggum: "He forgot to lock 'em" |
111k |
| nose | "Look Ralphie, if your nose starts bleeding it means you're picking it too much, or not enough" | 52k |
| plncrsh | "Ok folks shows over nothin' to see here show's o-oh My God! A horrible plane crash! Hey everybody get a load of this flaming wreckage, come on crowd around...crowd around, don't be shy... crowd around." (One of my personal favs) | 93k |
| pretty | "Ya know fingerprints are just like snowflakes, they're both very pretty" | 37k |
| push | -comotion- "All right people, listen up! The harder you push, the faster we will all get out of here!" | 69k |
| swim | "Do not be alarmed, continue swimming naked. Ah, come on, continue. Come on, aww" | 79k |
| tailligh | "Huh, the left taillight's a little smaller than the right one. I guess I'd better pull him over" | 38k |
| takethat | "Enough of you Borax, Poindexter! A mans' life is at stake, we need action!" -gun firing- "Take that you lousy dimension!" | 102k |
| type | Wiggum: "Well, your story is very compelling Mr. Jackass, I man, uh, Simpson. So I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter hmm, hmm, hmm, hmmm..." | 142k |
| wiggum2 | "Ah, just get one of those inflatable women. But make sure it's a woman though, cuz this one time, I......huh" | 28k |
| wiggumcb | Marge: "My husband is on a murderous rampage! Over"
Wiggum: "Oh, well thank God that's over, I was worried there for a second" |
71k |
Ralph Wiggum| File
Name |
Description | Size |
| area | "Help! She's touching my special area!" | 35k |
| babies | "Mrs. Krabaple and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me" | 96k |
| caps | "I ate all my caps!" -POP- "ooo" | 30k |
| cat | "My cats breath smells like cat food" | 47k |
| dress | Lisa: "Now put your left leg into the left side of the pants and you're
done"
Raplh: "I dressed myself!" |
130k |
| fire | "Oww, my face is on fire!" | 18k |
| idaho | "I'm Idaho" | 12k |
| iluvu | "When I grow up I want to be a Principal or a catapillar. I love you Principal Skinner" | 95k |
| laugh | Ralph: "My parents won't let me use scissors" -children laughing-
Ms. Hoover: "The children are right to laugh at you Ralph,. These things couldn't cut butter" |
96k |
| milk | Ralph: "Can you open my milk, mommy?"
Ms. Hoover: "I'm not mommy, Ralph, I'm Ms. Hoover" -children laugh- |
275k |
| mittens | "My cats' name is Mittens" | 33k |
| nosebleed | "The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there" | 26k |
| rlphval3 | "Ms Hoover? I glued my head to my shoulder" | 34k |
| rwcookdn | "Will you cook my dinner for me? My parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to turn on the stove" | 69k |
| rwunderw | "A change of underwear!" | 16k |
| special | Flander: "Ralph, you'll be on special teams"
Ralph: "I'm special!" |
87k |
| tongue | "Ooo, ow, ow, I bit my tongue!" | 26k |
| tribute | Ms Hoover: "And for the tribute, I need a volunteer to present an oral
report on Principal Skinners' life"
Ralph: "Ms Hoover, which on is oral?" Ms Hoover: "Out of your mouth, Ralph. Volunteers? Thank you, Lisa" Ralph: "No, Ms Hoover, I'm Ralph" Ms Hoover: "I only need one volunteer, Ralph" Ralph: "Ms Hoover, which one is one?" Lisa: "Ralph and I could do the report together" Ms Hoover: "Your funeral" Ralph: "Ms Hoover?" |
576k |
| worm2 | Ralph: "Oww, Ms Hoover?"
Ms Hoover: "Yes, Ralph, what is it?" Ralph: "My worm went in my mouth and then I ate it, can I have new one?" Ms Hoover: "No, Ralph, ther aren't any more. Just go to sleep while the other children are learning" |
94k |
| barf | "I'm gonna jump until I barf!" | 20k |
| battle | Chaumers: "Are they as smart as they look?"
Skinner: "Well, let's uh pick one at random, ah, ummm how 'bout that one?" Chaumers: "You mean this boy here?" Skinner: "No! No! Lisa Simpson!" Chaumers: "When was the Battle of New Orleans?" Lisa: "January 8, 1815, 2 weeks after the war ended." Chaumers?: "First rate" Ralph: "What's a battle?" |
181k |
| bee | "Let's be friends. It says bee and there's a picture of a bee on it, huhaha." | 77k |
| berries | Lisa: "All we found were the oozing berries and they look pretty poisonous"
Ralph: "I ated the purple berries! Owww, ooooooo, mmmaaaahhhh" Bart: "How are they Ralph, good?" Ralph: "They taste like...burning!" |
162k |
| bovine | "When I grow up I'm going to Bovine University!" | 34k |
| boy | "I'm a boy!" | 12k |
| choochoo | "It says choo-choo-choose me, and there's a picture of a train" | 69k |
| dog | "Um, Miss Hover, there's a dog in the vent!" | 41k |
| dontknow | "Aaaahhh, I don't know" | 26k |
| fumes | Ralph: "Mr. Simpsons, the fumes are making me dizzy!"
Homer: "Yeah, they'll do that" |
54k |
| moon | -flipping of film reel- Ralph: "Miss Hoover, the movie's over"
Lisa: "Where's Miss Hoover?" Girl: "Hey, her car's gone!" Ralph: "Maybe she drove to the moon" |
110k |
| gofish | Bart: "Got any three's?"
Ralph: "Go fish!" Bart: "Ohh, see here's the problem Ralph, you have several three's" Ralph: "Go fish!" |
94k |
| hags | Ralph: "Bye witches, thanks for not eating me"
Chief: "Yeah, you hags are all right" |
53k |
| haha | "He's still funny, but not haha funny" | 28k |
| heaven | Nelson: "Listen here, daddy's boy, you cost us one more game and you're
dead!"
Ralph: "You're going to heaven!" |
93k |
| juice | "Somebody stole my juice money!" | 27k |
| knob | Ralph: "My knob tastes funny"
Survey Guy: "Please refrain from tasting the knob" |
87k |
| moonrock | Ralph: "I found a moonrock in my nose"
Bart: "Chh, Houston, we have a booger" |
58k |
| nowetpan | Ralph: "I'm scared, daddy! Too scared to even wet my pants!"
Chief: "Ok, son, just relax and it'll come" |
75k |
| pedal | "I'm pedaling backwards!" | 19k |
| r_marry | "I love Lisa Simpson and when I grow up I'm going to marry her!" | 46k |
| redcrayn | Ralph: "Miss Hoover?"
Miss Hoover: "Yes, Ralph" Ralph: "I don't have a red crayon" Miss Hoover: "Why not?" Ralph: "I ate it" -children laughing- |
188k |
| trowel | Ralph: "Princtipal Skippal! Or Prindipal Stimpkar! I-I found
something! It's a spear head!"
Miss Hoover: "That's your trowel blade, Ralph, it fell off the handle" Ralph: "And I found it!" |
78k |
| tar | Ralph: "Mr. Simpson, the tar fumes are making me dizzy"
Homer: "Yeah, they'll do that" |
60k |
| salmon | Counselor: "Here's you scientifically selected career"
Ralph: "Salmon gutter?!" |
45k |
| sandbox | "This is my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end!" | 45k |
| snaggle | Miss Hoover: "Ralph, remember the time you said Snagglepuss was outside?"
Ralph: "He was going to the bathroom" |
76k |
| special | Flanders: "Ralph, you'll be on Special Teams"
Ralph: "I'm special!" |
87k |
| streat | Ralph:"Dad, when I grow up, I wanna be just like you"
Skinner: "Better start eating, kid" -snickers- Chief: "Start eating!" -laughing- Ralph: "I didn't mean it that way" |
102k |
Wiggum .wavs wanted: -The boy in the well episode
where the Chief says he's too important to go down the well
-Episode where they want to impound boat due to barnacles and a wet deck
