The DCFutures FanFiction Group recognizes that Batman and all related characters are property of DC Comics. These stories are written for no profit, but rather a strong desire to peer into the future of the DCU. The stories and concepts presented herein, however, are property of the author. So there. **** BATMAN: DCF #22 (A DCF Goes to the Movies Participant) **** Written and Directed by Erik Burnham (darvey@rocketmail.com) With additional editing by the mysterious X... **** BATMAN created by Bob Kane and Bill Finger BATMAN: DCF created by Erik Burnham **** "One Robot, One Alien, One Neurotic Billionaire Crimefighter... And A Baby" **** "Great Scott!" "My word, Master Clark. You just don't hear that exclamation any more. I wonder why that is?" Pause. Rewind. Clark Kent woke up, as usual. Walked up the stairs to Wayne Manor, also as usual. Noticed out of the corner of his eye Alfred's robotic tendrils busying themselves. Nothing out-of-the-ordinary there. Clark then poured himself a glass of orange juice and drank it, placing the glass in the autowash when he was finished. And then, Clark turned to see the face of Doomsday. "Coochie coochie coo, Master Clark!" We now return you to the scene in progress. "Alfred, where did that come from?" "He was left on our doorstep, Master Clark. Cute, isn't he?" Clark looked at the infant, with its elephant-gray skin and protruding bones. And it looked at him. And they looked at each other. And it was a wonderful thing. "RAAAAAAAAAGH!" Okay, maybe not so wonderful. "Alfred, do you know what that is?" "A baby?" "That... child looks exactly like a monster that killed me." "So I see, Master Lazarus." "Alfred, this isn't funny! That baby is... is..." "Hungry, Master Clark! Pardon me, while I prepare its bottle..." "Bottle? Are you insane?!?" "No. Hold him, won't you?" **** Tim Drake sat in the library of Wayne Manor. He'd no idea how he'd gotten there, nor did he much care. It was serene, it was peaceful, it was... "No, I am NOT going to change it!" ...Pretty much too good to last, is what it was. **** Imagine, if you will, being thrust into the most supremely peaceful state of being you had ever known your entire life. You're aware of nothing, and then, suddenly, you know the utmost calm. A loud noise interrupts your tranquility. Following the source of the din, you turn a corner and see the greatest hero the ages have ever known in heated argument with an artificial, omnipresent robot with a decidedly bad sense of humor. And, being shoved between the hands of the alien champion and the tentacles of the security droid... a baby. An ugly baby, but a baby nonetheless. "Just what exactly is going on here?" **** Clark stared at Tim with wide, embarrassed eyes. Alfred used one of his many photovid units to register Tim's reaction. And Clark's. His computer brain raced to come up with a suitable explanation. "It was all his fault, Master Tim. I swear on my mother's grave." "Alfred, you don't have a mother," Tim yawned, rolling his eyes. "Technically, no. But I did feel a strong bond with the toaster-matic you threw out last week, sir." "Ha. What is that?" "Doomsday," Clark started. "A baby!" Alfred interjected. "Where did it come from?" "It was left on the doorstep, sir... in a basket. Cute, isn't he?" "As a cardinal sin," Tim smirked. "Was there a note to go along with this cliche?" "Yes, sir," Alfred said, letting loose a tendril from its hidden cache in the walls of Wayne Manor, clutching the note that had accompanied the infant. Tim looked upon the scratchy handwriting, which read: "Look after baby, or I smash. Love, Me." Clark covered his mouth to cover a snicker. Alfred said nothing. Tim sighed loudly. The baby growled. "I think he's hungry, sir." "Synthesize him a bottle or something, then." "I did, Master Tim. He ate it." "Then synthesize him a side of raw beef, Alfred; just get it to shut the hell up!" "Yes, sir." **** Elsewhere, Alucard Holmes reviewed the preliminary reports on the Batgirl. Very interesting, for something he had had no part in. Her skin was dense; as close to invulnerable as one could naturally be. Her bones were -- and this puzzled the League geneticists -- not formed of conventional human marrow. They could withstand extremes in pressure; indicating that she was gifted with superhuman strength... as she would have to be to withstand such a punch from his Batman. Her mask was equipped with visual dimmers. Apparently, she was quite photosensitive. Very interesting. She was enhanced. Carrington believed it was the League's doing -- but there was no process on record with such results. Meaning, of course, her abilities came from somewhere else. Fascinating. The most intriguing thing about this Batgirl, however, was this: she did not have a metagene -- inborn or introduced -- in her body. Her strength, her abilities... they were all completely natural. And she was a human. But where did she come from? How did she manifest powers and abilities beyond those of normal men without a metagene? And how could it be turned to an advantage? ...Mysteries that would do well to be solved. Justice would demand it. **** "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" "Clark, I take it that that's not a good sound." "The last time I heard it, Metropolis was being destroyed." "What do you propose we do then, Master Lazarus?" "Quit calling me that!" "Lazarus?" "A long story, Master Tim." "I see. Clark, what DO you suggest?" "I'm all for killing it." "Clark!" "It's an unstoppable killing machine that doesn't stay dead. I say we kill him and thrust him into the deepest regions of space before it resurrects itself." "Tossing a problem someone else's way... that doesn't sound like you, Clark." "You've never had to deal with this thing before." "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" "Can we get it to shut up, at least, so we can think of a way to kill it?" "Master Tim! You cannot kill a defenseless baby!" Alfred was firm. And, lacking any other option, he began singing to the child. To everyone's surprise, the monster quieted down. Clark joined in with his baritone; the song was familiar to him. Tim finally acquiesced and made it a trio, soothing the savage beast with music... "Oh, the shark has pretty teeth, dear... And he shows 'em, pearly white... Just a jack knife has Macheath, dear... And he keeps it way out of sight..." "Master Clark, you wail." "Shut up, Alfred." **** Meantime, the moon shone brightly over Gotham City. Impressive, he thought. He'd never been to Gotham before. He preferred Metropolis. But, seeing as how he was being paid to be here, he may as well force himself to tolerate the place. Truth be told, he may have done this one for free -- just to meet this Batman he'd heard so much about. The Bat from the late 20th had always been an idol of his... no-nonsense human taking down metas as if they were nothing, battling side-by-side with the giants of the world, and more than holding his own. They feared him. Was this Batman comparable? Was the persona he wore for the public real, or a way to give a false sense of security? What's more -- was he worth eliminating? That's the question. The Vigilante remained, as always, for hire... but he would not kill those that did not deserve it. He prided himself on this one moral and would hold onto it until he left this world. Things weren't always what they seemed. Two parties had taken the trouble of contacting him in regards to this Batman. Was he or wasn't he the problem they claimed? Only time would tell. **** "I still say we should kill him, while he's unconscious." Clark Kent said the words, Tim noticed, but it wasn't his voice coming out of his mouth. What? "I disagree. He was trying to protect us," Alfred replied with no trace of accent, and quite a bit softer than expected. "From what? The League? Pshaw," Clark returned in a completely new voice. What was going on? "What if he's hurt?" The new voice -- a woman's -- startled Tim more than the others. It came from the baby he held in his arms. It was weird to see the ugly gray mouth, full of craggy, bone-like protrusions spit out the exquisitely feminine voice... but it was happening. "I can't tell if he's breathing," the Baby continued, reaching for Tim's face. "What if he's..." Tim felt a pain as the child gripped him by the underside of the chin and began to rip off his face... **** "WHHHHHHHAAAAAH!" The Batman screamed, his eyes shooting open, information flooding into his mind like a speeding bullet. He was lying in a woman's lap. She was removing his mask, and had managed to bare the lower half of his face before Tim regained consciousness. He was looking at the roof of a warehouse... The same warehouse where he had fought the Penguin, Bradley Carrington, and the Bat-chick not long ago. "Wha'happen?" Tim asked, pulling his mask back into place and sitting up. "The man in the suit said something, and you just collapsed. We thought..." "Which way did he go?" Tim asked, returning to his senses. "We didn't see; they just walked through the wall there and..." Tim was gone. No one saw him leave; he just disappeared in the blink of an eye. "Batman?" Kylie asked, with only a group of half-conscious and confused cops to hear her. **** END! **** NEXT ISSUE: Clark and Al's Bogus Journey! TIM ALONE IN GOTHAM! The return of Shannon Mitchells, and more Alucard Holmes! (Plus I'm sure we can work the Vigilante in there as well!) **** GOING BATTY **** Letters! Here we go! (Keep 'em coming!) Date: Fri, 06 Nov 1998 23:53:27 -0500 To: Erik From: Matthew Subject: Batman#21 In support of the DCF and what it represents I have said that I would sent my comments on what I read. Batgirl! Yeah... good Idea for a sidekick for the Penguin. Who'd a thunk it. The Penquin is great and new but still true to the noble aspects of the original. Need a crossover with the Flash. Just a quick one. Oh and try writing an issue to a Johnny Cash Cd. From your list of Songs with #21 I reccomend his unchained Album. Till we see the Thing:DCF I'll see you in the Futures. Matthew ****Johnny Cash? For Batman? ...Why not, I guess it's all about Men in Black... Heh. As to a crossover with The Flash, all I have to say to that is: Batman crosses over with any that care to cross over with him (just like in the real comics industry... I mean, c'mon! Gen13/Batman? Can you think of anything more mismatched? Sorry, ranting...) So what I'm saying is: Talk to that wacky Tom Hancock, and we'll see what we can do...**** From: "Jason Tippitt" To: darvey@rocketmail.com Subject: Re: Batman #21 Date: Fri, 06 Nov 1998 15:26:10 PST Erik, Great issue this time around. The new Penguin is someone I like a hundred times better than his DCU counterpart. And his partner... well, I knew a Batgirl was in the making, but it never once occurred to me that this might be her debut. You completely surprised me with that development. It'll be interesting to see what happens next issue when Tim and Alucard meet. And the signs pointing towards a trip to Metropolis are also intriguing. Keep up the good work, bud. -- Jason Tippitt ****Thanks, Jason... and BTW - we need to get Bats and the Squad together again real soon. Heh. Maybe just Mercury. Or Nemesis. Or... well, uh... Glad you liked the Penguin. Truth be told, when I had originally conceived him as an anti-hero, I wasn't sure how folks would take him. I mean, he's sorta like the Punisher... or along those lines... with that air or the aristocracy about him. I'm also pleased that Batgirl surprised so many... (Mostly because, I guess, everyone assumed I was gonna bring Catwoman in as the partner... heh) The only thing now is to figure out a way to actually BRING Catwoman into this...**** From: "Matthew Bevilacqua" To: Subject: Batman #21 Date: Fri, 6 Nov 1998 12:09:03 -0500 Good job, another well written issue. I usually, make that never, write to these things, cause I never know what to say beyond the "good job" but-kissing part. Nice weather we're having, eh??... :) Well, good job on the issue, and I'm glad the DCF finally has a Batgirl, although I'd think she'd make a better Bat*woman.* And this penguin's far more deadly than the old... and far more likeable. I don't even read the regular Bat-books in the DCU. But I can find the time to read this one. Matt:)hew (long story) "MMM... donuts...." ****Ooooh... forbidden doooonut... Heh. Another Penguin fan. Wow. May have to consider a Pengy back-up story one day. As to the weather, it sucks. 20 degrees and waiting for snow... but thanks for the thought!**** From: g.steele@mailexcite.com To: darvey@rocketmail.com Subject: Just wanted to give you your "props" Date: Thu, 05 Nov 1998 16:33:35 PST Well, apperently you fine guys at the DCF aren't getting the respect you guys deserve. Apperently, you guys aint' gettin enough fan mail. Well, SHAME ON ALL THOSE WHO CLAIM TO BE FANS OF THE DCF AND DON'T BOW DOWN BEFORE YOU ALL. Unfortunately, I gotta include myself in that group. Don't get me wrong, I love the stories, each and every one of them, but it's easy to just read them, and forget to give some words of glowing praise. And for that I'm sorry. So I'm gonna try to make my wrongs right. I love your work at the DCF. Batman's always been my favorite comic character-bar none. He's the coolest! Superman, Spider-man, X-men, Cap. America, yeah, they're okay...but can they kick the ass Bats does, WITHOUT their superpowers? Batman is THE man. He gets the coolest toys, he's got the coolest villains, he's got the MONEY babes (c'mon, what fanboy hasn't drooled over Catwoman?). And you do a great job of writing him. Okay, technically it ain't Brucie. But Tim is a damn good successor to the throne. You've done a great job adding to the Batman myth, and you deserve the praise. I just can't wait for more! By the way, lovin' the Nightwing X-over, and the Ssquad issues were some of my all time faves...especially with the way you dealt with Booster's death. Some remarkable writing, sir, I tip my hat to you. Your fan, G.Steele ****The intentions of that letter will forever be misinterpreted, so I'll just let it become a part of the past and move on. As usual, I'm always happy to hear I haven't messed up the Batman legend too badly. Thanks a whole bunch for appreciating my closure on Booster (one of the more difficult things I've backed myself into writing) and as to the Batman/Nightwing crossover, you've the lean, mean, and dearly departed (from the realm of fanfic that is) Tony "Pimp-Clone of Mark Waid" Wilson to thank for that. The majority of it was his brainchild, and I'm only sorry we can't eke more stories out of him.**** From: MSR77@aol.com Add to Address Book Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1998 14:46:15 EST To: darvey@rocketmail.com Subject: Re: [dcfutures] Batman: DCF #21 Hey! I just finished reading the story and all I can say is wow. I think Penguin is an interesting and deadly villain, definetly on the caliber of a Hannibal Lectur. I also do like the Maria character, she seems to be a pretty tough character and I love how in fact her nickname is Batgirl. Also, I think for your casting call for the role of The Penguin/Bradley Carrington that Anthony Hopkins would be a good choice. Well, keep up the good work and I'll be looking forward to the next issue! Mike Rehor ****Muchos gracias, Mr. Rehor! Maria/Batgirl is INDEED pretty tough. She's gone through a version of the League enhancement and is all you'd want in a fighting machine! Interesting call on the part of the Penguin - I never thought of Anthony Hopkins (I was kinda thinking Nathan Lane at first, then DS9's Colm Meaney) But now that you mention it... Hopkins is indeed perfect! Great call, Mike! You win the Blind Bat award! (Something you just can't see, but it's there. We swear.)**** >From: glenn.burnside@natinst.com >Date: Thu, 5 Nov 1998 10:43:31 -0600 >Subject: Re: [dcfutures] Batman: DCF #21 > >I gotta say, the Batman issues I get from DCF are some of the best comic reading I've seen - the "programming" of Drake is obviously reminiscent of that of Azrael in the "real" DCU, but I think you have a much better take on it - especially the incomplete merging of the actual and programmed personalities. I tend to see it as a blend of the Batman and the Joker into one person - grim and gritty, then manic. I can't wait to see how it all pans out! > >Keep up the good work, >Glenn Burnside ****First, allow me to thank you wholeheartedly for the praise... as I think of names like Busiek, Smith, Waid, and Kelly, the comment makes me feel all the nicer. As to the programming, it wasn't exactly lifted from Azrael; although it may seem like it. I only read a few issues of KnightQuest and the Knightfall novel to get a picture of Jean-Paul in my head... it seemed like his was a product of lifelong brainwashing, whereas Tim's is inlaid genetically and kinda... off. Maybe Az's is like that too, now. But I digress; I hope to show that Tim's programming is a lot different than it appears! And the comparison with the Joker... I like that. And I'll bet you just can't wait for Batman: DCF #25! Heh. How's that for foreshadowing?**** THE LAST FEW PARAGRAPHS OF THIS ISSUE WERE WRITTEN TO THE FOLLOWING CDS/SONGS: GUITAR SLINGER/THE DIRTY BOOGIE - BRIAN SETZER ORCHESTRA NIMROD - GREEN DAY PLEASE PLAY THIS SONG ON THE RADIO - NOFX CLERKS - THE SOUNDTRACK I KID YOU NOT. And with that, I bid you adieu until next time! -Erik VISIT GOTHAM: http://www.geocities.com/area51/chamber/9727/gotham.html VISIT THE DCF DISCUSSION BOARD: http://disc.server.com/discussion.cgi?id=6074