• Scene 1: Three wise men
• Cartoon: Opening credits
• Scene 2: Jesus speaks
• Scene 3: 'Stones, sir?'
• Scene 4: The stoning
• Scene 5: The ex-leper
• Scene 6: Mandy tells Brian he's a Roman
• Scene 7: Brian meets the P.F.J. at the forum
• Scene 8: Romanes Eunt Domus
• Scene 9: The commandos
• Scene 10: The raid on Pilate's palace
• Scene 11: Ben, the ancient prisoner
• Scene 12: Pontius Pilate
• Scene 13: Brian and the spaceship
• Scene 14: Harry the haggler
• Scene 15: Guards search Matthias' house
• Scene 16: Brian the prophet
• Scene 17: 'He has given us... His shoe!'
• Scene 18: Simon the Holy Man
• Scene 19: 'You're all individuals!'
• Scene 20: Pilate and Biggus Dickus
• Scene 21: The commandos act another resolution
• Scene 22: 'Out of the door. Line on the left. One cross each.'
• Scene 23: Pilate's addwess
• Scene 24: The jailer and his assistant
• Scene 25: The crowd laughs at Biggus' thpeech
• Scene 26: Crucifixion party
• Scene 27: Pilate gives the crowd one more chance
• Scene 28: Parvus and Mr. Cheeky
• Scene 29: The centurion questions the jailer
• Scene 30: The P.F.J. goes without further ado
• Scene 31: 'Always look on the bright side of life!'

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