From the Floating Log at Frogmorton

(In the original, the unsolved mystery is who the song
is about. In this filk, it's who's singing it.)

You're So Vain (by Carly Simon)

You walked into the story
Like you were gonna take over the plot 
Your hood strategically dipped below one eye 
A useless sword in your sock
You had one eye on the Ringbearer 
And both of 'em bloodshot 
And all the readers thought that you were the bad guy 
You were the bad guy, and 

You're so vain 
You probably think the tale is about you 
You're so vain 
I'll bet you think the tale is about you 
Don't you? Don't you? 

You met us at the inn at Bree 
When we were still quite naive 
Well, you said you'd save us "by life or death" 
And that you would never leave 
But I'd like to ask, just who saved you?
'Cause I think it was me.
You had your plans, they did not tend toward Mordor, 
Not tend toward Mordor, and 

You're so vain 
You probably think this tale is about you 
You're so vain 
I'll bet you think this tale is about you 
Don't you? Don't you? 

Well, I heard you were a Rider of Rohan
And all the men liked you best
Then you won some battles for Minas Tirith 
And rode off into the west
Well, you're where you should be all the time 
And when you're not, you're up 
In Lothlorien chasing after an elf maid 
After an elf maid, and 

You're so vain 
You probably think this tale is about you 
You're so vain 
I'll bet you think this tale is about you 
Don't you? Don't you?

-- Fool of a Took