From the Floating Log at Frogmorton

Ever since I was Olorin,

I've worn the Ring of Fire.

From Mirkwood down to Rohan

From Gondor to the Shire.

But I ain't seen nothing this bad

Since Denethor’s funeral pyre...

This Mouth of Sauron

Sure is a bald-faced liar!

He shows me a short sword,

And Frodo’s mithril vest.

Imagine Sam and Frodo

In some foul orc-nest!

He looks for a reaction,

And Pippin gives him one.

That Mouth of Sauron

Is riding a horse on fire!

Am I a has-been wizard

Or is this just a test?

A washed-up wizard,

But wait! I see a twist!

Who does he think he’s fooling? Not Gandalf!

What makes him so sure?

He ain't got the main attraction

‘Cause if Sauron had the Ring,

Wouldn’t stand here yakkin’

Playing us along.

It would all be over,

Sauron would have it all...

That Mouth of Sauron

Sure is a bald-faced liar!

I thought I was

About to buy the farm

But now I see that

He can’t do any harm!

Blinded by his ambition

He wants Isengard.

Well, where’s Bilbo’s old Sting,

The mate of my Glamdring?

He's not caught those crafty hobbits

Hasn’t got a clue

That Mouth of Sauron

Sure is a bald-faced liar!