From the Floating Log at Frogmorton

Oh where oh where can my Precious be?
Baggins took it away from me!
He’s goin’ to Mordor and that looks bad‘
Cause I can’t get back the Precious that I once had.

We were out on the stairs up to Shelob’s lair
I wasn’t really playing fair.
There in the path straight up ahead
Shelob was waiting, the hobbits looked dead
I felt bad about it but I was in the grip
Of the Ring – it’s the ultimate trip.
Along came Sam with the sword and the glass,
Shelob got jabbed and I hauled ass.

Oh where oh where can my Precious be?
Baggins took it away from me!
He’s gone in to Mordor and that looks bad‘
Cause however this ends, for me it’s bound to be sad.

When I caught up with them at Sammath Naur
There wasn’t a single soul around
Except the nice hobbit and Sam
But somehow I found my Precious that night
I pushed Sam to the ground and looked for Baggins, but
He must have put on the Ring, that’s what!
I held him close and his finger I bit
I got the Ring but now I’m in deep sh**
I fell off the edge into the Cracks of Doom
Now Orodruin is my tomb.

Oh where oh where can my Precious be?
Baggins took it away from me!
But I’ve got it back and now I feel glad,
At least I don’t have to worry ‘bout Sauron getting mad.
Woe, woe, woe, woe…Oh, oh, oh, oh…