(Dedicated to my wonderful beta Owlharp, without whose help this story would never have been finished...You can put away the oil and skewers now, Owlie! <-g->)
Hercules walked into the dark room. He leaned against the door jamb and just looked at the scene before him.
Alcmene sat beside the small bed where his best friend lay. Iolaus was barely visible under all the bandages. The demigod watched his mother stroke the hunter's hair, while holding his hand and whispering encouragements and endearments in his ear.
"Still no change," she told him quietly, not even looking up. She always knew when her son was near. "Come back to us, Iolaus," she whispered to the unresponsive blonde. Kissing the injured man's forehead, Alcmene stood and released his limp hand. She walked over and embraced her son, looking up at him in concern. "You've been to the grave every day this week."
"I have to make sure that everything's perfect for when he first. . ." The demigod's voice broke and he wiped at his eyes.
"Son, you've hardly sat with Iolaus at all. The living need as much attention as the dead, don't you think?" She reached up and cupped his cheek with one palm. "Hercules, tell me the truth. You've been working on the graves to avoid being here with Iolaus, haven't you?"
"Mother. He's my best friend! Do you honestly think I don't care enough-?"
"I never said you didn't care. I think you're afraid."
Hercules began to protest, but his shoulders slumped as he nodded, closing his eyes.
"Mother, how do I tell him? How do I tell my best friend that his precious little girl is dead? That his whole family is now gone. . ." He turned away from her, a shamed look on his face. "Why didn't I let that fence go? We could've gone fishing as we'd planned. Cassi would still be here. . ."
"Hercules." Alcmene moved around so that they were facing once more and grasped both of his large arms, squeezing them slightly. "You can't blame yourself. You had no way of knowing this would happen anymore than Iolaus did. It was an accident. A horrible, tragic accident, but an accident nevertheless. I loved that little girl, too. I wish there was a way to change what happened, but there isn't. Right now all that matters is Iolaus. He's going to need all of our love and support if he's to survive this."
The demigod nodded mutely. Kissing his mother's cheek and taking a deep, steadying breath, he made his way over to the bed and sat down in the chair his mother had vacated. Taking his friend's smaller hand in both of his, he began talking to him. He told the hunter how much they all missed him and wanted him to come back, then began talking about all their past adventures.
Alcmene watched for a few minutes, then went to help Deianeira in the kitchen.
Not long after he first began talking, Hercules could feel small movements in the hand he held.
"Iolaus?" He looked at his friend's face and thought he saw his eyelids flutter ever so slightly. "Iolaus? C'mon, Buddy. You can do it. Come back." He continued his gentle coaxes, squeezing the hand he held reassuringly. Iolaus' head began to move slightly from side to side and his eyelids fluttered more and more. Finally, two unfocused eyes opened and the demigod's heart skipped a beat. "Hi, Buddy." There was no response at all. "Iolaus? Iolaus, can you hear me?" Panic began to well up inside the demigod as he waved a hand in front of his friend's face and there was no reaction. No indication that he was being seen at all. "Mother!" he called frantically.
Alcmene rushed back immediately.
"Hercules, what's-?" She saw Iolaus' eyes open and began to smile in relief until she saw the panicked look on her son's face. Stepping forward, she bent over the blonde and ran a hand in front of his face as Hercules had just moments before. There was no response. "Iolaus?"
"Look at his eyes, Mother! And he can't hear us!"
"Hercules. Calm down." She continued to study the hunter's face, but reached over to lay a comforting hand on her son's arm. She stepped back from the bed and looked her son in the eye. "He's not blind or deaf, Son. He's just not awake, no matter how it looks."
The panic subsided and Hercules let out a long sigh, releasing the breath he wasn't even aware he'd been holding. Running a hand through his chestnut hair, the demigod looked up at his
mother.
"I thought he was awake."
"I know. It's progress though. He hadn't responded at all before this. You must be getting through to him somehow." She placed a kiss on top of her son's head and returned to the kitchen.
Hercules slumped back in his chair and looked once more at his unresponsive friend.
"Okay, Buddy, where was I? Oh, yeah. Do you remember Ruff? I swear, you're the only person I know of that would adopt a baby basilisk. . ." The demigod shook his head fondly at the memory.
The rest of the evening was pretty much the same. The demigod sat, holding his friend's hand, relating stories of their youth. When it was time to feed his friend, Hercules held him in his arms as Alcmene spooned the broth into his mouth. Iolaus swallowed reflexively, but otherwise there was no response. Afterwards, Hercules returned to his storytelling until he finally dozed off.
Sunlight hitting his face finally woke the demigod the next morning. He looked down at his friend, who was still lying there with his eyes open, and smiled sadly.
"Good morning, my friend," he said, stretching. "How are we feeling today."
"I don't know about you, but I feel awful."
Hercules almost overturned his chair at the sound of the raspy voice. He looked at Iolaus in astonishment and a smile lit his face as he realized those eyes were once more filled with life and were focused on him.
"Hi, Buddy," he said softly, smiling down at his friend and catching one of the hunter's smaller hands in his own. "Welcome back."
"What happened?" the hunter asked weakly. "I feel like a mountain fell on me."
Hercules dropped his eyes for a moment, trying to get the images from the chasm out of his mind.
"Close." His voice cracked slightly, but he cleared his throat and continued, "What's the last thing you remember?"
Iolaus' azure eyes began to roam as he tried to recall.
"Cassi and I were waiting for you. We were supposed to go fishing. . ." Suddenly his eyes widened in alarm. "She didn't see me get hurt did she?" he asked urgently.
"No. No, she didn't see you get hurt." The demigod had to fight back tears as he thought of the mangled body of his friend's little girl buried under a small pile of stones.
"Good. I wouldn't want to scare her that way. Is she with Deianeira?" The blonde's voice was growing fainter as his eyelids started to droop and he was on the verge of unconsciousness once more.
"She's being taken care of, my friend. Don't worry."
Hercules realized that Iolaus had lost the fight and was now sleeping deeply. He sagged back in his chair and placed a hand to his forehead as he tried to stem the flow of tears that threatened.
How could he tell his friend that his daughter was dead? Iolaus couldn't even remember the accident, how could he possibly handle this news?
"If I tell him now it will kill him. No. I'll wait til he's stronger." A small voice in the back of his mind told him that delaying the inevitable wasn't the answer, but he steadfastly ignored it. "He'll be stronger in a couple days. I'll tell him then."
"He'll be stronger in a couple days. I'll tell him then, I promise."
Deianeira and Alcmene shared a look then both met Hercules' eyes.
"Son, you've been saying that for the past week. I made the promise not to tell him myself because at the time he was barely able to remain conscious more than five minutes at a time. I also believe he should hear it from you. Hercules, if you don't tell him soon, it's only going to lead to more pain for him."
"Your mother's right, Hercules." Deianeira moved to touch her husband's arm. "He's asking to see Cassi. How can we lie to him and allow him to believe she's fine only to tell him later that she's been dead the whole time?" Her voice cracked on the last words and she had to turn away.
Hercules moved to put a comforting arm around his wife and placed a kiss on top of her head.
"I know I should've told him earlier, but I was afraid of losing him as well. You're both right. He needs to know the truth, and he needs to hear it from me." He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a steadying breath, then looked toward the room where his friend lay. "It's time I put my own fears aside and think about Iolaus."
The demigod reluctantly stepped away from his wife and made his way to his friend's bedside, stopping first to lean against the door jamb and watch his friend unobserved. Or so he hoped.
"Hi, Herc. You can come in," his friend's amused voice called to him, though Iolaus never turned around.
Hercules made his way over to the chair beside the bed, shaking his head as he sat.
"You'd think I'd learn not to underestimate those senses of yours."
"One of these days maybe." The blonde's smile slowly disappeared as he looked at his friend. "Herc, what's wrong? I mean, I can tell you're hiding something. And Alcmene and Deianeira have been acting strangely every time I mention wanting to see Cassi." He shifted a little to look Hercules straight in the eye. "What is it? Doesn't she want to see me?"
"Iolaus-"
"I mean I can understand if she's afraid to see me while I'm hurt. . ."
"No, Iolaus. That's not it. Cassi-" He cut himself off and stood suddenly, running a hand through his chestnut hair. 'Gods, how do I say this?'
Iolaus saw his friend's agitated state and an icy hand clenched his heart.
"Is Cassi sick? Is that what you're trying to tell me?" Memories of the plague that had taken his son's life returned to haunt him.
The demigod took a shaky breath trying to brace himself for his painful duty. He returned to his friend's side, this time sitting on the edge of the bed and placing a comforting hand on Iolaus' shoulder.
"No, my friend. She's not sick." He closed his eyes, mustering his courage and fighting the tears that threatened. "Iolaus, I never told you everything that happened. You and Cassi had gone hunting in your favorite spot. Apparently, you were on your way back across the ravine when the earthquake hit."
Realization began to dawn in the hunter's cerulean eyes and Hercules could see him beginning to tremble as he began to slowly shake his head in denial.
"No. Herc, please. . .She's not. . .She can't be."
"I'm sorry, Iolaus. She was already gone when I found you."
"NO! Gods, please, not her too!" His whole world seemed to crumble around him as his whole body was wracked with heaving sobs. "Why her?! Why?!"
Hercules could feel tears slipping from his own eyes as he gathered his friend into his embrace, mindful of his injuries, and held him against his heart as he sobbed out his grief. There was no answer for the question that his friend was repeating over and over. The demigod could only whisper reassurances and rock his friend gently.
He held Iolaus until the blonde had cried himself out, then allowed him to pull away. His heart ached as he watched the smaller man lie down and curl in on himself, as though shutting out the world.
"You buried her next to Ania?" the hunter quietly asked after several moments of silence.
"Yes."
A nod of his head was Iolaus' only reply before closing his eyes and waiting for sleep to overtake him.
Hercules remained sitting on the bed until he was certain that his friend was sleeping, then made his way back to the kitchen.
Iolaus waited til he was gone before stumbling out of bed and making his way, unsteadily, across the room to where his clothes lay, neatly folded. On top of the small pile was his hunting knife. He picked the blade up and regarded it steadily.
"Poor Iolaus. I feel so bad for pushing you into telling him so soon." Deianeira looked up at her husband, feeling guilty for the pain she saw written in his eyes. "Maybe we should've waited. . ."
"No. You were right. I should've told him earlier. No matter how long I'd waited, the pain would be the same." The demigod slumped down in a chair next to her. "I just wish there was someway to take the pain away. It kills me seeing him suffer so much. . ."
"Hercules!" His mother's anxious voice called from down the hall.
Hercules and Deianeira rushed toward Iolaus' room, only to meet up with Alcmene coming out to get them.
"Mother, what's-?"
"Iolaus is gone! I went in to check on him and the room's empty. All I found was this." She handed him Iolaus' hunting knife. "Hercules, he's in no shape to be wandering around on his own. You have to find him."
Hercules was staring numbly down at Iolaus' knife. The hunter would never leave that knife behind on purpose unless. . .
"Don't worry, Mother. I'll find him. I think I know where he is."
The demigod kissed his mother and wife and hurried out the door, trying to hide the panic that had grabbed hold of his heart. He ran as fast as he could toward Iolaus' home.
Iolaus stood, barely, looking over the three graves. Tears coursed down his face as he thought of each of his loved ones. His whole family. Gone.
"Ania. I've missed you and little Herc so much, My Love. The day you left me, I wanted to join you. Cassi was the only thing keeping me here. I couldn't leave this world and leave her alone." He looked down at the fresh grave. "She looked so much like you. It was like your spirit was still here. Now-" He broke down into harsh sobs. "Now, I've lost everything!"
Flashes of memory assaulted him.
"DADDY!! HELP!!"
"I'm here, Baby! Grab my hand, Cassi."
He was leaning over the side of a cliff, reaching his hand down to her.
"I've got you. Daddy's got you," he cried as his hand clamped over hers.
A terrified scream and the sensation of falling.
He fell to his knees over the small grave.
"I'm sorry, Baby. I'm so sorry." The sobs were rapidly depleting what little strength he had left and he lay down over the plots, closing his eyes and waiting. "I'm coming," he vowed softly. "Daddy's coming."
"Iolaus! Gods, no!"
Hercules dropped to his knees beside his friend's still form. The temperature was dropping as night descended, and when he touched the blonde he was alarmed at how cold he felt. Rolling him over, he pulled the hunter's limp body into his arms.
"Iolaus. Please. Open your eyes. C'mon, Buddy, don't leave me," he begged as tears coursed down his cheeks and into the golden curls.
"H-Herc?"
The weak voice startled the demigod as he pulled his friend up enough to see that his blue eyes were now open. A chill went through him, that had nothing to do with the weather, when he saw the lack of life in those cerulean orbs.
"Hey, Buddy," he smiled, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. "You had me worried for a minute there."
"Herc...Herc, bury me here. Beside Cassandra...."
"Iolaus," Hercules' voice shook as he realized his friend was giving up. "You're going to be all right. I'll get you back to the house-" He had started to pick the hunter up and was surprised to meet with resistance.
"No! I want to stay here! I have to stay with them..." The sobs began again, shaking his whole body. "Lost everything...be with my family...Please, let me go!"
"Don't you understand? I can't let you go, Iolaus. You're part of my family, too." Hercules pulled the devastated man into his embrace once more, his own tears beginning anew. "I don't know how I'd ever live without you." He waited for some kind of reply, but received none. "Iolaus?" He pulled back and looked down at his friend. The hunter's gaze was locked on the graves, but his eyes were glazed and unfocused. "C'mon, my friend. Let's get you home." He scooped the unresponsive blonde up and began the journey back to his mother's home.
Iolaus' eyes didn't leave the small graveyard. Even when it disappeared from view, he continued to look in that direction. Back where he longed to be.
Back where Ania stood, holding their son on her hip and their daughter's hand in her own.
"Iolaus, you have got to eat!" Hercules' voice was strained as he held his friend in his arms, forcing his mouth open so that his mother could ladle broth down the hunter's throat. He loosened his grip on the hunter's pinned arms fractionally, in an attempt not to hurt the struggling man.
"There. That's the last of it." Alcmene stepped back and placed the bowl on the table.
"I'm sorry, my friend." Hercules released the hunter and Iolaus lay in his arms, totally unresponsive. The only indication that anything had been happening the last few minutes was the hunter's labored breathing. It broke the demigod's heart seeing his friend dying more with each passing day. The only time the blonde even acknowledged their presence was when they tried to feed him and the resulting struggle amazed the Son of Zeus. For a man so weak, he put up a fight as well as the Iolaus of old. "I hate having to do this to you, but you have to eat. You have to fight this. You've never given up before and I am not going to let you give up now!"
"Hercules. Son, you have to eat as well. Come along." Alcmene stood at the door, beckoning her son to follow her to the kitchen. She saw him begin to argue. "Now," she said in a voice which brooked no argument.
The demigod reluctantly stood, laying his friend down and covering him with the sheets. Iolaus continued to lie motionless, his eyes staring out the window at something only he could see. Hercules sighed sadly, smoothing the golden hair away from his friend's forehead and followed his mother out of the room.
"Hi, Daddy!" The little blonde looked up and smiled as Hercules entered the kitchen.
"Hi, Sweetheart." The demigod put on his best smile as he walked over and placed a kiss on Ilea's head. "That good?" He asked, pointing to her plate.
"Mmm. Hmm," she managed around a mouthful of food, nodding vigorously.
"Find out for yourself." Deianeira handed him a plate of food and gestured toward the dining room. "Is he any better?" she asked as they left the room.
Ilea watched the three adults go into the next room, then turned her attention to the room that Daddy had come out of. The grown ups were always going in and out of that room, but she wasn't allowed to go back there.
Curiosity getting the best of her, the little girl got down from her chair and quietly made her way down the hall to that secret room.
"Iolaus."
"Ania?" The hunter squinted against the light filtering in from the window. He smiled weakly as he recognized the lithe brunette. "Ania," he sighed happily. "I'm coming, Love."
"No, Iolaus. It isn't your time yet. The children and I miss you, but you have work to do here. You have another family to take care of."
"Ania, I have nothing left here. I want to be with you," he declared stubbornly. "You and the children... I can't go on without you!"
"Iolaus, do you remember all the happiness we shared? Our wedding? The day Little Herc was born? The day that we discovered I was carrying Cassandra?"
"Yes, but. . ."
"No. Listen to me, Love. Those happy times are much more important than the sad. As long as you go on, our love lives on. If you let yourself die like this, it will overshadow all of that." She reached forward and brushed a lock of hair from his face. "I remember the first time I saw you. You were so handsome. The sun in your hair and the sky in your eyes." She remembered with a smile. "But what really drew me to you was your spirit. Once you had your mind set on something, nothing was going to change it. You were stubborn. You were reckless. But most of all you had a love of life. You've survived so much in your life, you can't just give it up now. The man I fell in love with and married would never lie down and die."
"It's just so hard!" He looked up at her with pain-filled eyes. "I just want to be with you..."
She took his hand in both of hers. "Please, Iolaus. I would love to have you back with me, but I would rather see you grow to an old age and have a wonderful life. Please don't make me or the children the reason for your destruction. I couldn't stand that."
"I'm sorry, Ania." He began to sob and was vaguely aware of being pulled into a loving embrace.
The feel of her arms around him once more and the familiar scent of jasmine that he always associated with her were a balm to his wounded soul. Her long graceful fingers running through his hair and her softly murmured words of endearment help to ease the sobs as he nuzzled into her soft dark hair, breathing in her scent.
"You and the children are-were-my life. When Little Herc died it broke my heart, but the day you died I almost did as well. I didn't know how to go on without you." He said once he was able to speak again. "But I had Cassi. She was a part of you and everyday I saw more and more of you in her. When I felt like giving up I would look at her and know that I had a reason to go on. Now she's gone too and I have nothing left. Gods, it hurts so bad. . ."
"I know, My Love." She caressed his cheek lovingly, a sad smile came over her beautiful face. "That's why I brought this." She held up a small vial of dark liquid. "Drink this, Iolaus. It will take the pain away."
He looked at the bottle curiously, then up at her loving face. He reached for the vial and put it to his lips with a trembling hand. It tasted like water, but with a strange tingling sensation.
"What was that?" he asked drowsily as darkness began to appear at the edge of his vision.
"A gift from me and the children." She was leaning closer, but her voice was sounding more and more distant as he fought to keep his eyes open. "Til we meet again, My Love."
A soft touch of lips on his and blackness enveloped him.
He was dreaming. A small girl was waving at him from a distance, smiling and blowing him kisses. Then a young woman carrying a baby came and took her by the hand. They both smiled back at him as they walked away, disappearing into the mist.
"Uncle Eye-oh-lus?" a soft voice called him and he could feel someone shaking him awake.
He opened his eyes slowly. He felt drained and totally weak. What had happened? When his eyes focused on the small blonde standing beside the bed, he couldn't help smiling.
"Hi, Ilea." The huskiness of his voice startled him.
"Ilea?" Hercules' voice came from just outside the room.
"She's in here, Herc."
"Iolaus?" The demigod was immediately by the bed. "Ilea, go to Mommy, Sweetheart." He ushered his daughter off, then looked back down at his friend in a mixture of wonder and relief. It was almost as if the last two days didn't happen. The blonde was weak, but the life was back in his eyes. "How do you feel?"
"Like I was hit by a cart. What happened?"
"You don't remember?"
"No. The last thing I remember. . .a dream." He laid his head back on the pillow. "It was strange. A woman and two children." He murmured as he drifted back to sleep. "Don't know what it could have meant. . ."
Hercules stood looking down at his friend in bewilderment for a moment, until he noticed something lying beside him in the bed. He picked up the small object. It was a bottle with a bracelet wrapped around it. After a moment, he recognized the band as the wedding bracelet that Iolaus had given Ania. . .and had buried with her. Then he saw the symbol engraved in the bottle.
The Lethe. The river of forgetfulness in the Underworld.
Hercules stood on the small hillside where the three graves lay. The ground was flat, no visible indication of the graves remaining. Instead of the grave markers that had stood there before, there now stood three stones. The demigod looked down at the bracelet in his hand and reached out to touch the largest of the three stones.
"Thank you, Ania. I promise that when the time comes, I'll be sure that he gets this back." He wanted to say more, but words failed him.
"Herc? Hey, Herc!"
The demigod turned and looked down the hill where Iolaus stood, holding Ilea's hand and three fishing poles.
"Coming!" He touched each rock reverently, then hurried down to take his daughter's free hand. "Sorry.".
"Don't worry, Herc. I sometimes find myself talking to those stones, too. It's funny, but it's almost as if they have souls. I feel better just being near them at times." He smiled sheepishly. "I guess that sounds crazy. . ."
"No. Not at all." The demigod smiled warmly back as they continued to the fishing hole. "If they do have souls, I'm sure they feel better when you're there, too."
Behind them, the stones seemed to radiate a light of their own for a moment.
Til we meet again. . .