brooklinegirl@rcn.com
NC-17
9/2006
For Pearl_o: Five things about having sex with Fraser that surprised Ray Kowalski
1) He's not quiet. Ray somehow thought the Fraser would be buttoned-up, you know, all lip-biting and stifled moans. But in bed, he talks. He tells Ray what he likes, he tells Ray how good it is, he asks - demands, really, in that intense tone that turns Ray on hard - that Ray tell him what he wants. Fraser never asks for anything in bed, not out loud, but Ray's been watching Fraser for a long time. Ray knows body language, and when he gives Fraser what he's asking for, Fraser gets loud, louder, and the way he says yes sends a shudder down Ray's spine.
2) He's done it before and he knows what he's doing and Ray knows you don't learn that from any book.
3) He's not shy. He agrees, instantly, with pretty much everything Ray suggests. Ray started off easy, figured handcuffs and leather was easy - couldn't be that much of a surprise to Fraser that those thing turned Ray's crank. But he says yes to everything, everything, with a hot look in his eye, like he's sorry he didn't think of it first.
4) He's not patient. He pushes Ray, he goes after him with this sort of wildness that Ray didn’t expect. He knew Fraser had it in him, sure, but he figured that so many years of tamping it down, he wouldn't know how to let loose. But Fraser in bed is like nothing Ray's ever known - he's crazy for it, and Ray feels sometimes like he's breathlessly just trying to keep up.
5) Ray didn't know. He just didn't know. He'd been watching Fraser forever, it felt like, and he just didn't know that Fraser wanted him like this, enough to push aside guilt and duty and caution, and it's all for him.
For phineasjones: Five places Fraser and Ray Kowalski tried really hard not to fuck:
1) In Florida, in Stella and Vecchio's guest room bed, which had too many pillows and really soft sheets. The air conditioning was too high, and the room had weird shadows in the corners, and Ray could hear the stairs creak as Vecchio and Stella made their way to bed, murmuring quietly in the hallway outside. But when he rolled over, tugging the covers up higher, Fraser was still awake, looking at Ray in the dark. Ray whispered, "Hi," and pushed in closer, and Fraser wrapped one warm arm over his side, and that’s all it took. They fucked as quiet as they could, and Ray's throat hurt from biting back groans. When he lifted himself up on one arm and saw Fraser with his head thrown back, biting his lip so hard, Ray whimpered and came, thrusting against Fraser's soft belly.
2) Fraser said that his office was official space and not meant for such a thing. Ray pointed out that Fraser had slept there, that the cot was, as a matter of fact, still propped in the corner, making it into a sort of bedroom, really. Fraser raised an eyebrow and said he disagreed, and Ray shrugged and pressed his hand against the front of Fraser's wool uniform pants. He didn't know for how much of the conversation Fraser has been hard, but something about breaking some tiny rule really got Fraser going, because he came about two minutes after Ray dropped to his knees and got his cock into his mouth.
3) Ray had thought they'd wait, take it slow, because this was weird, wasn't this weird, him and Fraser and he'd figured they'd need to let it build. But apparently a year of trying not to let this happen was plenty, because all he'd done, all he'd done, was slide across the front seat and press Fraser against the door and kissed him as best as he knew how. And his best was apparently really good, because it seemed like only a few minutes later that they were scrambling over into the backseat, and Ray was thanking god Fraser was in jeans and not the uniform. The two of them had the windows steamed up and their pants open in no time, and Ray had to bite down hard against Fraser's shoulder when Fraser grabbed hold of his hips and pressed up against him.
4) Every time, Fraser said being on stake-out meant focus and vigilance and attention. He said it with his eyes firmly forward and his mouth firm. But every time Ray shifted and spread his legs and sometimes tilted the seat back, Fraser's eyes would dart over, taking in the scene before immediately focusing back on whatever apartment or warehouse they were supposed to be watching. And by the time Ray thumbed open the button on his jeans, and arched back to slide his zipper down, and pull his cock out, Fraser almost always had that hot, unfocused look in his eye, and his attention, and focus, and vigilance, were most certainly not on the apartment, or warehouse, or whatever.
5) On the couch in the consulate, because Ray was under arrest, and Fraser was in charge, and there were regulations, there were rules, and it wasn't right, surely it wasn't right, but when Ray spread his legs further, and moaned into Fraser's mouth, every single one of the arguments going on in Fraser's head collapsed, and Fraser found himself scrabbling to undo Ray's jeans while Ray arched back under him, muttering, "God, Fraser, yeah, yeah."
For justbreathe80: Five ways Ray and Fraser fucked during a snowstorm:
1) It's winter in Chicago and the snow is drifted on the fire escape, blocking half the window. Fraser can hear the wind whipping by outside, but it's nothing like the sleek sound of the wind on the tundra. The wind in Chicago has an angry, trapped sound as it skids up against buildings and through alleys, like it's trying to blow its way through the concrete. Fraser wanders the apartment, distracted and on edge, snapping at Ray like he's trying to pick a fight, but that's not it, that's not it at all. But Ray, Ray just studies him quietly, lets the words roll off of him, and finally, finally takes hold of his shoulder and pins him against the wall, kissing him and kissing him, until his heart is pounding so loud he can't hear the wind anymore.
2) It's storming so hard outside that the tent is shaking with it, but Ray can't think of that, can't think of anything but how damn hot Fraser's hands are on him, how fucking hard Fraser is up against him. Fraser rolls him forward, presses him down and god, his cock is hard and slick and sliding right inside of Ray like that's where he's meant to be. Ray is moaning so loud it almost sounds like sobbing against the roar of the wind outside, and Fraser's breath against his ear as he mutters Ray's name over and over again is the hottest thing he's ever felt.
3) It's the sixth fucking day of the storm and the cabin is too small and the wind is too loud and everything is too cold, and Ray hates everything about Canada, and Fraser, and the goddamn wolf. He pushes Fraser, is an asshole, argues every damn thing that comes out of Fraser's mouth, until Fraser gives in, shoves him, and ah, yeah, there they go. He takes a swing, and Fraser ducks it easily, and tackles him to the floor, and they're fighting. Ray takes an elbow to the stomach and while he's still sucking for breath, Fraser pins him to the floor, and he's panting down at Ray, and he looks pissed. Ray still can't breathe right, and he's trying to curse at Fraser in between struggling for air, and then Fraser is kind of laughing down at him, and then he's got his hands in Ray's hair. And then they're rolling around again, but they're kissing, they're all over each other. The storm is raging outside, but Fraser is yanking Ray's pants down, biting the inside of his thigh, tonguing his balls, and Ray is gasping up at the ceiling of the cabin they built together, and he still can't breathe, but it's good, it's good, it's so fucking good.
4) They get to the cabin just as the storm hits. Inside, Fraser is stripping off his hat, his scarf, his gloves, and when he slides his coat off, Ray realizes it's more skin than he's seen in weeks. He pushes Fraser up against the wall, tasting the inside of his wrist, the curve of his throat, the thin strip of skin that appears as Ray undoes the snaps on his long underwear. Fraser has his head back against the wall, panting out loud as Ray runs his tongue over all the spots he's been thinking about for weeks, been thinking about forever.
5) They've been in Canada for three winters and it maybe says something about Ray that snowball fights still turn him on. He tackles Fraser into the snow, and breathlessly kisses his mouth. Fraser arches up against him, heedless of the freezing cold snow against his head, drags him closer, and kisses him back.
For aerye: Five things Kowalski wants Vecchio to tell him:
1) It kills Ray that Vecchio has this whole huge history with Fraser that Ray only knows from reading about it in reports and case files. Ray has worked with Fraser; Ray knows that he only has maybe half the story.
2) It twists Ray up inside and so he never thinks of it, never thinks of it even once, he can't, because there's no goddamn point to it, but god, when he's well and truly drunk and not thinking about it, he wants Vecchio to tell him that he loves him more than he ever loved Fraser or Stella.
3) Ray drags Vecchio to bed, pushes him down and ignores Vecchio's hands tugging at him, trying to get him to slow down. He knees his way onto the bed, tugs Vecchio's zipper open, and goes down on him the best he knows how, sucking him slow and deep, losing the rhythm just before Vecchio's ready to come, until Vecchio is cursing at him in a slurred, sex-drunk voice, because he wants Vecchio to beg for it.
4) Ray wants someone to tell him that he was right to leave Canada, that Fraser is okay up there all alone with the snow and the cabin and the wolf. That it's not his job to give up everything to make Fraser happy. That it's okay to feel good about being home.
5) Ray wants to know about what happened with Fraser and Victoria more than anything else, but Vecchio gets the exact same dark, hurt look in his eyes that Fraser gets whenever they even skim the surface of the topic, and so Ray never asks.
For beledibabe: Five things Fraser wants RayK to do to him, but can't ask:
1) Hold him down. Pin his wrists to the bed and lie on top of him and not let him go, no matter what. Hold him there, brushing kisses against his lips, his jaw, his neck, until the pressure of Ray's fingers around his wrists, the pressure of Ray's body holding him there, holding him down and not letting him go, not now, not ever, makes him jerk and come against the soft skin of Ray's belly.
2) Fraser's got an erogenous zone at the base of his back, right in the middle, just above his ass. Sometimes Ray's fingers brush against it, and it sends a bolt of heat through Fraser's body, turns him on so much his vision blurs. He can't figure out a way to ask Ray to put his mouth there, press his lips against him and lick him right in that very spot. He thinks, if he can ever figure out how to ask, that he could come, just from that.
3) Ray gets impatient with Fraser's uniform. He'll be kissing Fraser, and excitedly tugging at his belt, his buttons, his straps, until finally he yanks his mouth away from Fraser's, and blows out his breath in frustration. "Take it off, take it off," he'll say, his voice tight and breathless, and Fraser does.
But what he wants, what he really wants, is for Ray to find the patience, once, to do it all, and do it slow. Undo the fastenings of the strap, unbutton his epaulets, loosen the lanyard and draw it over Fraser's head. Push him down on the bed and straddle him as he slides open Fraser's belt, grinning at him all wicked as he does so. Undo the bright gold buttons of the uniform jacket one by one, slipping the buttons through the holes like he has all the time in the world, like he can wait forever. Push the sides of his jacket open, push his shirt up as he licks a rough, hot stripe up his stomach.
Then, Fraser thinks, Ray would shift, move further down, undo his pants, every button and hook and zipper, and push those aside, too. He might run his hand lightly over the boxers, where Fraser would be so very hard, before sliding off the bed entirely to kneel on the floor at Fraser's feet and - carefully, slowly, with great attention to detail - untie Fraser's boots, loosening the laces, not tangling or knotting them as he went.
Until finally, finally, Fraser would be sprawled on the bed, half-dressed but all undone.
4) He wants Ray to sit him down and look him in the eye and tell him that this is forever.
5) He wants Ray's mouth on him. He wants Ray's fingers in him. He wants Ray hard up against him, and he wants it all the time.
~end~