"Ooohhhhhh," I groaned sitting up in a bed. I put a hand to my head but my wrist hurt when I did it so I put it back down, someone was beside me- but who? I turned my head to see a blonde boy lying a little ways on my pillow, his face was tucked away under his arms so I couldn't see it. "Where am I?" I wondered out loud, I looked around the room with my eyes and noticed that the t.v. was on. "When did I turn on that thing?" I asked myself but couldn't think of the answer. As I watched what was on it the boy began to stir, I looked down at him as he sat up rubbing his eyes.
It took him a second to look at me, than he broke into a gorgeous smile. "Hey Carni', how do you feel?"
'Carni'? Is my name Carni?' I wondered as he threw his arms around me for a hug and I didn't hug him back. "Who are you?" I asked him but he was at the door and didn't hear me.
"Mrs. Hart! She's awake!" He said in a low whisper, "bring a nurse or a doctor!" He turned and walked back into the room with that same smile- he was very cute. "Your mom's coming," he said to me crossing the room and giving me another hug. "I can't believe you're awake, you were out of it for three days....." he pulled away and looked me in the eyes with his icy green blue ones. "Your mom said that I could stay the night this time, you know and watch over you while you sleep.....ar- are you OK?" He asked me still staring hard.
"I don't feel hurt, except my arm and wrist.....who are you?" I asked him, I mean this person is being very friendly with me I'd at least like to know who he is- oh wait! "You said my mom was coming, does that mean you're my brother?" I threw my arms around him for a hug, but he moved away and looked at me.
"No, Emily. It's me- Rocky- your boyfriend?" He said with concern in his voice.
"What's a boy friend?" I asked and he backed away from me, slowly as though he were out of it for three days....." he pulled away and looked me in the eyes with his icy green blue ones. "Your mom said that I could stay the night this time, you know and watch over you while you sleep.....ar- are you OK?" He asked me still staring hard.
"I don't feel hurt, except my arm and wrist.....who are you?" I asked him, I mean this person is being very friendly with me I'd at least like to know who he is- oh wait! "You said my mom was coming, does that mean you're my brother?" I threw my arms around him for a hug, but he moved away and looked at me.
"No, Emily. It's me- Rocky- your boyfriend?" He said with concern in his voice.
"What's a boy friend?" I asked and he backed away from me, slowly as though he were gonna catch something bad.
"Mrs. Hart hurry!" He came back over to me and held my hand. "Emily please tell me you remember me?" He pleaded. "Who's Emily, my name is Carni'- remember you called me that?" I answered.
"I called you that," he mumbled out in some sort of disbelief.
A woman walked into the room with blonde hair and another person I've never seen before who was a man and a short brown haired woman behind him.
"Emily, oh Emily, sweety you're awake." The woman hugged me harder than the blonde- Rocky did.
"Doctor?" The blonde- Rocky was asking, "what's wrong with her- she doesn't know who I am, I don't even think she knows who she is."
The doctor as the Rocky called him came over to me and flashed a light in my eyes, I closed them to avoid it but he patted me on the shoulder. "I need you to open your eyes Emily, so that I can check your pupils." The man said to me and I did what I was told.
"Well, do you know?" Rocky asked.
The doctor shook his head and moved away turning off the light, "Emily, now listen carefully, can you point to your mother?" he asked me backing up so I could see everyone in the room.
"Um.....? Her?" I pointed to the blonde woman and everyone smiled, I must have done good! They all smiled and hugged me closely- at least until the doctor asked, "now tell me, what is your name?"
"Carni'." I smiled out and they all frowned
"Mrs. Hart, it pains me to tell you this but it looks like your daughter may have a slight case of amneasia."
"Oh good Heavens, how will-....? Is she going to get her memories back?" The blonde woman asked.
"It's very possible that she will but there's also a slight chance that she won't.......I'm very sorry." The doctor said touching her shoulder. Rocky looked at me with a face that seemed like curiosity or sadness. "Emily?" He said to me or to himself, but he didn't go on..........
Time had passed and alot of things had happened I was put into normal clothes which was a pretty pink dress, and my hair was in a ponytail with a pink ribbon coming down into it- mom had done it for me; Rocky never left the room not even to use the rest room he just sat there holding my hand while we watched t.v. a show called "Little Bear" was playing and it was cute it seemed like my kind of show.
"Are you feeling any better?" Rocky asked me, "cause your mom said that you're being let go.....I wanna make sure you're perfectly OK before you walk out of here."
"Silly boy, I feel fine." I patted his hand to reassure him but he still frowned from it. "What's wrong?"
"I don't know, it's just weird, when you look at me- you see a stranger and when I look at you-..........I see that- that I'm doing things all wrong with our relationship, otherwise this never would have happened to you." He said sadly
"I'm not sure what your talking about, but, I'm pretty sure I feel the same way." I smiled saying and threaded our fingers together, resting my head on his shoulder.
* * *
I got into my moms car and Rocky went with his. We were going to my house, I was really excited I wanted to see what it looked like and what my room looked like, but I was also kinda nervous because my mom said all my friends were waiting there for me and I'm pretty sure I don't know any of them.
"Here we are sweety." My mom smiled brightly and parked the car in the drive way, helping me out of it.
A man took my bags she said he was my father- he was nice too. When we got inside a group of people yelled, "Surprise!!!" I was startled even though I knew they were inside I just hadn't expected the sudden shouts and hugs.
"Hi Emily, are you feeling OK, sorry you got hurt- wanna sleep over at my house next week?" A blonde girl said to me and I smiled at her but backed away to my parents, Rocky and his mom came in a moment later and he took my hand again.
"Remember what I told you kids, she might not know who you are right now but it'll come back to her slowly but surely, just don't rush her." He said this kinda looking at Rocky who lowered his head. "Why don't you all get re-aquanted while I get us something to eat." My dad went into the kitchen with my mom and Rocky's.
"Come on Emily," the blonde girl said taking my hand and walking me to a seat, a few people sat around me with smiles that seemed a bit forced and nervous, but one boy with dirty blonde hair my hand up and shook it vigoruosly. "I'm Colt, Rocky's brother- do you really not know who I am?" He asked with interest, and I nodded but smiled.
"It's nice to meet you Colt, you have a weird name like Rocky's I'm pretty sure I won't forget you tomorrow." I said.
"Weird?" He said wrinkling his nose, "it's my ninja name, my family name is Jeffery."
"That's confussing how do you keep up with what to call yourself?" I asked him and he just shook his head making a face I couldn't identify. "I'm Tum tum!" A young brown haired boy piped up.
"Are you Rocky's brother too?" I asked, and he nodded. "nice to meet you."
"I'm Eleanor, your bestfriend." The blonde girl said.
"Is that like a boyfriend?" I asked her and she laughed shaking her head.
"I'm Michael, the boy that lives across the street." He said, he was pretty cute he had a long ponytail and the most darling lips.
"Hi Michael," I said shaking his hand.
"Hi, I'm Paula, one of your bestfriends." She said sweetly with a smile and hug.
"I have so many friends I must be very liked." I said.
"You are." Rocky said to me rubbing my arm.
Eleanor took my arm and stood me up with her, "come on. I wanna show you your room- no boys allowed! Come on Paula." She said dragging us both upstairs.
I wonder why Emily was acting so strangely all week? I thouht as I sat in my bath tub- this is where I do my usual thinking- something about the water is just.....I don't know relaxing. What happened to Buster, where hd he gone during all this- home?
I hatd him at that point, he hurt Emily and ran like a coward...I would never do that...EVER. As I held my breath my eyes stung and I wasn't about to let what I knew was coming, out and holding my breath usually stopped it. She-.....she wouldn't let me touch her...she wouldn't let me tell her I loved her.....she said to me that night when I tried to talk to her threw our phone, 'How can you love someone you don't even know?' and that for me had done some damage.....she didn't love me anymore.
I had stayed at home getting the littl hints from her that maybe she didn't want me around...maybe then- I'm the coward.
There was  knock at the door followed by a voice, "Sweety? You almost done? Someone's here to see you." Mom said.
"Is it Emily?" I called through the door not really wanting to answer her and just be left alone for a while.
"No, it's Buster. Emily's cousin." She stood outside the door, I could tell waiting for the anwer she knew was coming, but it didn't, "I'll be right out." I called and stood up to cry off.
When I got downstairs I saw him sitting on the couch, calm and collected like he was the man of the hour and when he saw me he smiled and I just raised an eyebrow to his expression and sat down in my father's arm chair and waited for him to talk when he didn't say anything I rushed the conversation out of him.
"What is it?!" I nearly shouted.
"Listen man, I'm sorry for what I did to Emily and-....."
I cut him off, "Don't say it to me, say it to her.....! I'm not the one lying at home confussed about who I am.......I mean what were you thinking that day?!" I couldn't stop yelling at him it was all to much for me. "You're a sorry excuse for a human being, now get out!" I hadn't meant that last part but that's how it ended my sentence. He seemed angry- I don't blame him- he stood up and walked to the door but paused with his hand on the knob and looked at me.
"You're the coward you know...? Running around acting so cool- when you're not,you say I shud apologize to Emily, why don't you do it first she misses you, ya know and you're sitting here playing century 23 with your emotions......I have said I'm sorry to her and she might not know what I mean by it right now but she will later, what I did to her really was stupid and I know that. So don't go around playing Emily's keeper. See ya man." and with that he let- got in his car ad rove down the road maybe he was going home or maybe he wasn't but what he said had sank in...Emily missed me and if she missed me than maybe she still loves me! I have to help her remember. I ran upstars to grab everything and anythng that would help Emily remember us and all the things we've done together, everything about our friends would be in her room, this is gonna be great!!   
I wonder why Rocky hasn't come to see me, it's been weeks if my mind can add it all up. Well I guess I can kinda understand why he wouldn't, I'm supposed to be in love with him but....I just don't feel like I am.
When I look at him I see a very cute boy, but not someone that I can love and if he really cared for Emily as much as he says he does, he wouldn't rush be rushing me to damage her...the doctor said not to force it, but he is....he hates me- I know- for looking like her but acting like me.
I found Emily's diary from when she was growing up and I took a look at it; she seems like such a dull person trying to cover it up with meek popularity of her boyfriend and his brother's. It said that in January she became a cheerleader because her boyfriend Rocky- with a little heart by his name- was on the basket ball team.
She cheered her heart out but didn't really feel like she belonged with those girls but it was better to not enjoy yourself for a few dull moments than leave your boyfriend with a bunch of giggling cheerleaders. I could see her point I guess, he's really cute but he doesn't seem like he'd leave her- even if mad parana's nibbled his arm pits over a volcana while he stood on nothing but a thin piece of thread- but, I could be exagerating. Still....I can't help but think that maybe I don't want Emily to come back, I like this being here thing....I feel like I'm a person who's waiting to see the world maybe I'm just what Emily's body needed to break free of all that boredome and worry over her precious Rocky......but, as I'm thinking all these things tears slide down my cheeks because I don't know anything- it all feels like I'm just learning and it isn't fun! Mom and dad look at me like I'm some kind of stranger leaving in their home but with their daughters face. ! I tell them that maybe I just need some rest but they just smile wrly at me and say, 'No honey you take your time the doctor said not to rush it, it'll come back' but it's been weeks now and so far not a scratch of Emily seems to wanna resurface- but I don't really mind so why does everyone else care? Can't they learn to love me too! I got off of the bed and crossed the room sourly, taking Emily's diary from it's hiding place and then tossed it across the room. "You, are the stupidist person I barely know!" I shouted at it believing it was her I wanted to kick it with everything I had in me but I noticed a piece of paper lying on the floor that had slid out of it. When I bent down to pick it up a tear hit the paper that told me I was still silently crying. I opened the paper and read a few words- more tears- it was a love note. 
I knew that I didn't want to but I read it, and the sight- the sound of it- horrified me.
Dearest Carni' P.
I give to you, your favorite color,
of your favorite flower.
The meaning of pink is love,
but it also means healing and truth.
I think that it's really appropriate for us,
because me truth out loud and in secret,
is that.....
I'll always love you.
This letter is to me....before I was even here- before he even knew me.....he doesn't just love her- her loves me too. When I stood I nearly jumped out of my skin because Rocky was standing right behind me, I only took one step back but was yanked into his arms.
He hugged me tightly with his face planted in my hair and he rubbed my back hushing me as he did so.
"How can you love us both?" I asked barely a whisper into his neck, he sighed his warm heat into my ear and moved his head as though he wanted to look at my face but didn't wanna let go. "Because you're love to me, no matter what I call you Carni'." He responded softly stroking my hair. "But why did you give this to Emily? You knew me that far back before I even existed and you love me?" I said wanted to pull away and maybe be angry with him but I couldn't, we just stayed in the hug closing our eyes. It was like I could feel his mind at that moment because he moved his face to mine and kissed me, not as Emily but as me.
The kiss could have lasted forever as he started to talk against my lips, I had to pull back a bit to hear what he was saying to me, but when I did I wished I hadn't, and I pulled away walking away from him to the bed and sat myself down.
"What's wrong?" He asked with genuine concern.
"Who is she? Really?" I looked him right in the eyes, "Did you love her? Did she know about me?" It sounded odd in the back of my mind, but I let it out, I was jealous of myself or who was supposed to be myself and I wanted answer to why this pretty boy was messing around with the both of us.
"Em-.." he brought his words back and let them out differently, "Carni, you are Emily whether you know it or not.....Carni' P is my pet name for you, it stands for Carnation pink- you're favorite color, you're my love for Emily in one name because actions could go on and on....I don't know what's going on inside your mind but, somewhere in there is Emily- your whole self waitng to get out....." he paused and looked around the room with a sigh, than his face lit up and he went to the closet pulling a box off the shelf then proceeded to open the lid and skim through it until he pulled out a raggety little book.
"What's that, more memories?" I asked trying not to sound like I was glad he was there with me.
"Something like that," he responded with a smile and sat beside me on the bed closing me up by the wall. "In this book," he said opening one of the pages. "are all the flowers I ever gave you,"see this one?" He held up a pretty and still in surprisingly good shape yellow flower. I nodded and he looked me in the eyes and said.
"This was the first flower I ever gave you, and you said to me, 'how did I know it was your favorite?' I had lied completely and said 'because I just know,' you looked me square in the eyes and punched me." He broke into an odd laugh and I couldn't help but laugh too.
"I punched you? Why?" I asked.
"Because you knew I was lying to you." he said holding the flower to my nose.  "You didn't like the fact that I couldn't just tell you the truth about picking it up on my way out, and it happening to be your favorite." he responded pushing against my shoulder, still smiling.
"And I left you there," I added pushing back with a smile, "because I wanted you to think about what you did." I couldn't believe what was coming from my mouth as he nodded at me- how did I know that?
"The next day," he went on. "I came over to your house with a bunch of pink carnations which was actually all I could afford back then and I left them outside you the door of your bedroom. When you opened your door and picked them up you read the card and it said-......" I cut him off and continued, "I love you Emily, with everything I am, and even though I don't know your favorite flower- I know your heart, please don't be mad......" my mind blanket to numb for a brief moment and it was as though I opened my eyes for the first time and saw him again, Rocky- my Rocky.
"Emily?" He said looking into my eyes for some type of recognition.
"I grabbed our phone and simply said 'I hate it when you show off' and you said-...." this time he cut me off.
"I know Carni' P, I know....." He put his forhead to mine and grinned down at the bed.
"That was the first time you ever called me that......" I paused for a long time and looked at him with love- and rememberance. "Rocky.....I missed you."
He kissed me and got off the bed walking to the door then called over his shoulder. "I missed you too." He walked out waving over his head and closed the door and I was glad he did it, we both needed this moment to last and being away for a while would help us lock it in our minds forever. It feels good to be back.......
When I got back home I sat down on the floor against the door and I cried- long, loud and hard.
The End.

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