Lone Ranger

Beam Me UP

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are camping out in the open desert. They set up the tent, cook some beans for dinner and retire.
Late that night, the Lone Ranger awakens his faithful companion.
"Look up, Tonto! Tell me what you see!"
"Me see plenty stars, Kemo Sabe."
"And what does that tell you, old friend?"
Tonto looks up at the nighttime sky for a few seconds before replying.
"Well, astronomically speaking, it means that there are millions of suns out there and potentially billions of planets. Theologically speaking, it's obvious that God is omnipotent and Creator of all the universe.
Astrologically speaking, Jupiter has just entered the third house of Virgo.
Chronologically speaking, I'd say it's about a quarter past three.
Meteorologically speaking, it looks like it's going to be a splendid day tomorrow."
Tonto pauses and asks, "What it mean to you, Kemo Sabe?"
"It means," the Lone Ranger answered with sigh, "that someone's stolen our tent."