Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy?"
"Do have a heavy door you need held open?"
"...That's right, not even McGyver could fix it."
"So -- what are you wearing?"
"Duuuuuude! Bummer!"
"Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals, Cap'n."
"Press 1 for Support, Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes, Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
"We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape, and a car battery."
"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
"In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
"Hold on a second... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
"What do you want first, the bad news, or how much it will cost?"