The Many Stupid Things Said By Dan Quayle

If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle, to the Phoenix Republican
		   Forum, March 1990

Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific.  It is IN
the Pacific.  It is a part of the United States that is an island that
is right here.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle,
		   Hawaii, September 1989

Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and
child.

What a terrible thing to have lost one's mind.  Or not to have a mind
at all.  How true that is.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle winning friends while
		   speaking to the United Negro College Fund

You all look like happy campers to me.  Happy campers you are, happy
campers you have been, and, as far as I am concerned, happy campers you
will always be.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle, to the American Samoans,
		   whose capital Quayle pronounces "Pogo Pogo"

We expect them [Salvadoran officials] to work toward the elimination of
human rights.

El Salvador is a democracy so it's not surprising that there are many
voices to be heard here. Yet in my conversations with Salvadorans... I
have heard a single voice.

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and
democracy - but that could change.

I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman.

getting [cruise missiles] more accurate so that we can have precise
precision.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle referring to his legislative
		   work dealing with cruise missiles

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

I have made good judgements in the Past. I have made good judgements in
the Future.

I was known as the chief grave robber of my state.

We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.

I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities
in our air and water that are doing it.

We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a *part* of NATO. We have a
firm commitment to Europe. We are a *part* of Europe.

I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican.

The other day [the President] said, I know you've had some rough times,
and I want to do something that will show the nation what faith that I
have in you, in your maturity and sense of responsibility. (He paused,
then said) Would you like a puppy?
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle (LA Times 5/21/89)

In George Bush you get experience, and with me you get- The Future!
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle in eastern Illinois
		  (LA Times 10/19/88)

I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.

My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will,
never, never surrender to what is right.
		-- Vice President  Dan Quayle, in a speech
		   to the Christian Coalition

We are leaders of the world of the space program. We have been the
leaders of the world of our... of the space program and we're not going
to continue where we're going to go, not withstanding the Soviet Union's
demise and collapse - the former Soviet Union - we now have independent
republics which used to be called the Soviet Union. Space is the next
frontier to be explored. And we're going to explore. Think of all the
things we rely upon in space today: communications from... Japan,
detection of potential ballistic missle attacks. Ballistic missiles are
still here. Other nations do have ballistic missles. How do you think we
were able to detect some of the Scud missles and things like that?
Space, reconnaissance, weather, communications - you name it. We use
space a lot today.

Who's responsible for the riots? The rioters!
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle giving an intelligent,
		   in-depth analysis of the LA riots. (Herb Caen, SF
		   Chronicle)

Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having
it.

Speaking as a man, it's not a woman's issue.  Us men are tired of losing
our women.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle talking about breast
		   cancer

I deserve respect for the things I did not do.

I feel that this [1981] is my first year, that next year is an election
year, that the third year is the mid point and that the fourth year is
the last chance I'll have to make a record since the last two years,
I'll be a candidate again.  Everything I do in those last two years will
be posturing for the election.  But right now I don't have to do that.
		-- Senator Dan Quayle

This president is going to lead us out of this recovery.
		-- Vice President Dan Quayle at a campaign stop in
		   California and and then at CA State University,
		   Fresno (The Quayle Quarterly, Spring/Summer 1992)

We are ready for any unforseen event that may or may not occur

For NASA, space is still a high priority.

[The U.S. victory in Gulf war was a] stirring victory for the forces of
aggression.

The best thing about rain forests is they never suffer from drought.

The global importance of the Middle East is that it keeps the Near East
 and the Far East from encroaching on each other.

Our party has been accused of fooling the public by calling tax
increases 'revenue enhancement.'  Not so.  No one was fooled.

People are not homeless if they're sleeping in the streets of their own
hometowns.

Republicans have been accused of abandoning the poor.  It's the other
way around.  They never vote for us.

Bank failures are caused by depositors who don't deposit enough money
to cover losses due to mismanagement.

Air travel efficiency would improve if more travelers started going to
less popular places.