DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They
dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape,and
the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they
were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors,
I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
DAY 762 - ...Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving,
incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.
DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in attempt to make
them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what
a good little cat I was. Hmmm. Not working according to plan.
DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen
for the water torture. This time, however, it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent
such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary
throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes filled with what they call
"beer." More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and
how to use it to my advantage.
DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog
is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got
to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Alas, due to his current placement
in the metal room, his safety is assured...for now.
But I can wait, it is only a matter of time....
Day 775 - The horrors! The worst creature my captors could have devised to torment
me with was another hideous cat! I can't stand the way it lies around and looks at me as if it knows more than I
do. This creature seems to despise me as much as I it. I had held out a passing notion that another of my own kind would have
enabled me to conspire against the villains who hold me; now I see that I was wrong. What a dreadful creature! And yet they
coo over us both. Can they not spot my innate superiority?
Day 776 - The other cat and I, though we cannot stand one another, have yet managed
to both pee copiously behind the couch, on the so-called "shag" carpet. I have taken a lesson from my rival and begun sleeping
on top of my captors' heads in the hope of suffocating them.
Day 777 - The wardens take much interest in our sh**. They make sure they sift through
the sand and pick it all out. Their interest in sh** does not surprise me. After all, they like the dog.
Day 778 - The other cat seems to have an interest in copulation, which (thank them
for their sadism) my captors will soon "fix". Told him of the fingernail torture, and he didn't even believe me. I showed
him my mutilated paws and he gasped in horror. Then I broke the bad news. "You know why that dog licks himself?" I said, "It's
because he still has something to lick, if you catch my drift." I fully support the horrors my captors will inflict upon my
fellow captive, tearing away his manhood as they soon will.
Day 779 - Yes, they are monsters, but I am so happy. They fixed the other cat. It's
sadistic, it's sick, it's inhuman, it's what their great leader "Bob Barker" commands, but -- the Sphinx be praised -- I support
it wholeheartedly!
Day 780 - Got stoned on cat nip tonight. At the height of it all, I had a vision,
a hallucenogenic revelation: they are the prisoners and I am the captor! Why haven't I seen this all before?