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The Wall of Shame is dedicated to all those musical artists that stand out. No, not in the sense that they're "amazing" or "must listen to" artists, it's because they are "uniquely special" and warrant a special place in my heart. That special place is here, on the Wall of Shame, where all their years of hard work and dedication has paid off. Their life long desire to produce cheesy music and downright crap has made them champions in their field. So, without any further delays, I give you the the Wall...
(NOTE: All comments made in blue below are done so by my friend and are her views on each inductee)
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Backstreet Boys
For the longest time they've been the root of suicide amongst radio listeners around the world...why? Well simply put, their music is WAY overplayed and have been scientifically proven to cause deafness in the younger generation. They have carried on the spirit of that all-time favourite, N.K.O.T.B., plus they've gone the
extra mile in their uncreative ways by recreating a cheesy rip-off of Star Wars with their "Larger Than Life" video. What's the deal with that? Not to mention the plastic outfits worn at a past MTV VMA show...(It's a wonder I'm still talking to you) Here are others that have fallen into that wannabe N.K.O.T.B. phenomenon (excluding the Kids themselves) that earns them their rightful place on the Wall Of Shame
98 Degrees
This band consists of 4 guys that saw dollar signs and decided to cash in on the boy band craze...guess all they care about is how much can they rake in before their 2 minutes of fame wears off. (Aww..) Not to worry guys, we'll always remember you (yeah right) years later like we do with Milli Vanilli.
The original cheese band that caters to the preteen generation. They faded away long before most of you ever heard of them. They were a group of 5 guys, each one had a scary high-pitched voice, making you wonder if they ever got teased in school, like I don't know the answer to that one. If you want to know what they sound like, just listen to a BSB song. (Hey!) Long live the Kids...
ship
5ive
Another band that thinks they can sing but aren't as popular as the others...they'll keep trying for another album then hopefully they'll fade away. But their spirit will live on, courtesy of The Wall Of Shame.
N.K.O.T.B.
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'N Sync
It sure feels like I'm repeating myself with these bands...if you play all the songs of 'N Sync, BSB, 5ive and NKOTB, you'll be hard pressed to distinguish between any of them (I beg to differ)... Saturation of this market seems like it's their main goal. Could they just hop on a boat, head out in the middle of a lake...'N Sync? Any of them?
Cher
This old lady needs to retire...sure she came back with an album that made the charts, but really, who would even admit to buying this thing? It's like saying you own a Tina Turner CD...one quick way to have a CD go downhill is to overplay it. That's what happened to this one and now I switch the station at the mere
mention of her name with a song upcoming. Please, do us all a favour and just disappear.  I could say something horrible but it would be just too mean spirited and cause people to want to keep away from me, so I won't...but if you're curious, just use your imagination and relate it to her late ex-husband. (Now that was harsh!)
Eminem
Ok, this guy reminds me of someone I personally know...if I met him in person, I would call him Al Rhino, just by that resemblance. His "rapping" is typical Vanilla Ice, but with an edge...meaning this guys swears and Ice didn't. Find me a person that liked "My Name Is..." and I'll personally
smack them. This is a perfect example for people to say white guys can't rap. And to think Christina Aguilera called him cute...makes me want to rub him out! (Jealous?) After he ripped her in his "The Real Slim Shady" song, I'm sure she'd like to kick him where we'd all like her kicking him, so he can't produce anymore kids that walk like him, talk like him, just don't give a f*** like him.
Joey McIntyre
Fatboy Slim
crest
His first song (Rockafeller Skank) was a decent one, but the follow up to it just made me want to puke. Who's idea was it to choose this thing as a release, let alone the second one to a successful one? The song was bad enough, but that video, geez...it's something that makes me wish TV was never invented! Then on top of that, having that video win awards for who knows what, made me very ill inside. All I want to know is, who did he pay off and how much did it cost him?
Good Lord, and here I thought we left those NKOTB back in the 80's, then along comes one of them thinking we still care...well guess what, he found out that we still DON'T care! Why oh why did radio stations and music stations think we wanted to hear this guy and try to expose him to us yet again? At least he had only one release from his new album so we didn't have to subject ourselves to more headaches. (That album was a gift to me, I swear)
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Hanson LFO
Why won't they just go away?. We don't need another bunch of preteen  This is the band that brought us "Summer Girls"...a song that includes mentioning how Chinese food makes 
guys pretending to sing when all along, they were just squealing. I guess the reason they disappeared, for a while, is they hit puberty and realized their squealy voices turned into the thing we all knew all along...it's crap! Please don't make another album, two is enough. The worst part of this sad case of a band is that my girlfriend likes songs by them...ugh! them sick...any song that mentions food is a dead give away that the band couldn't think of any meaningful lyrics, unless it's used in a cute way. Just how much better would Celine Dion's "That's The Way It Is" sound if she mentioned how she gets diarrhea from eating clams? Way ta go LFO! (Ewww)
Ricky Martin
First he was singing his World Cup song...next he was Living La Vida Loca...now he wants to shake his Bon Bon...I didn't mind his first song when it first came out, but then we kept on living his vida loca too many
times and he quickly slipped into the "gotta shut it off before ear starts to bleed" category. The only video I didn't mind was the one for "She's All I Ever Had", mainly because of that attractive woman in there...yeah, you know what I mean! (Grrr) But please, can you go shake your bon bon someplace else, like somewhere far away where we can't see it?
What else is there to say about a guy who has a midget/kid (I can't really tell) rapping with him? Cheese or what? His songs suck (they do), pictures of him wearing only a hat aren't the kinds of things anyone wants to see...I think we can call him the Dee Snider of the 90's/00's. Oh, and can he not use anymore Metallica riffs in his songs ever again? That just ruins a perfectly good piece of music.
Kid Rock
...I don't want no pigeons....hey boys, we don't want you! How bad is it that your only claim to fame is an alternate lyric song to someone else's? Sure it works for Weird Al, but when you're trying to be serious, it just doesn't work. Will they stick around for a follow up song? Highly unlikely, so please, stop playing that song! Sporty Thievz
Lou Bega
Here he is, Mr. Mambo himself...well, what can we say about a guy that pencils in his mustache? If I hear that Mambo #5 song one more time in my life, I think I'll just switch over to listening to BSB...oh wait, that's the worse kind of torture I can think of! How
about we just tell Mr. Bega that he had his turn in the spotlight and now it's time to fade away like the rest of them. No matter how many other songs he comes out with (if he's got any others left in him), he'll always be unrequested because of his first song being overplayed.
Bliss
Most of you have never heard of this group, well lucky you! Not only are they trying to catch on as something of an All Saints, Spice Girls, B*Witched type group, they also try to pull the wool over our eyes by disguising the fact they can't sing with a video that tries to show off how "sexy" they are.
Well guess what girls, looks don't get you anywhere (unless you're Brit..nevermind)...your first song "Butterflies" shows strongly just how much talent you lack. Good effort for trying to make it, bad judgment in thinking you could actually sing. But hey, at least you're good enough (or bad, whichever way you look at it) to make it into the Wall of Shame.
TLC
Hmmm...this band was once one that looked promising. Even I thought they were ok, but long gone are the days of "Creep", which is too bad. Now all we have are 3 females that are fighting amongst themselves, songs that aren't that good which happen to be way overplayed (i.e. Unpretty), and the idea of them being
broke...I think you need a new manager, new lyricist and new attitude, or just call it quits now and we won't have to worry about any of that stuff! All I have to say right now is, welcome to the Wall.
Will Smith
So, we reach the Fresh Prince...I have no idea why the general public has fallen in love with this guy. He was an obnoxious guy on his Fresh Prince of Bel Air show, his music totally sucked, his attitude was of the "I'm a big
star, love me" type and he seems to try too hard to be funny when he just plain isn't. Let's face it, the guy just can't flat out act. He comes off too fake and when he's trying to be serious, he seems so laughable (and not because he's funny). When it comes to his music, nothing of his offers a hint of curiosity. I think Will should stick to one of either acting or singing, that way he can say he only sucks at one thing! (I like Will)
The Moffats
Canada's version of Hanson, though a little older, but not any better. They've got the teenybopper girls all screaming and pulling their hair out...all I have to ask is, why? They don't have a unique style to make them stand out and 
they look weird. Just think, one of them is Bob Moffat...how "cute" does that sound? Enough said...welcome to the wall kids.
I just want to let it be known that he listens to the Boys and he likes it
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