Disclaimers: This story uses the characters Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and Ephiny without permission from MCA/Universal. Universal and Renaissance Pictures run an incredible Action Pack, but they could really have a better method of selecting authors for their official Xena novels. The official Xena novels by Ms. Howard and Emerson do not even approach the quality and emotional intensity of the best that Internet Xena fan fiction has to offer!
Under-age Warning: This story contains non-graphic scenes of women having sex together. If you are under 18, read no further.
Subtext Notice: In addition, this story contains scenes of Xena and Gabrielle making each other wet. (I know what you're thinking... Get your mind out of the gutter! I'm referring to them sitting in ocean water, naturally.)
Note: This story is set after the Episode "The Bitter Suite". While a fine conclusion to "the Rift" story arc for Xena's 3rd season, a lot of fans are feeling understandably burned by the whole thing. Was the woman who jiggled turnips in front of Gabrielle in "Been There, Done That" the same woman who tore her best friend over two miles of terrain to the edge of a cliff in this episode? The writers of the show say Yes, so my story here follows what they ask us, the fans, to accept.
"C'mere, you..." Xena growls affectionately as she pulls a laughing Gabrielle to her, as seaweed splashes around them. As she luxuriates at the closeness of her soulmate, a sheet of cold runs through Xena. I killed Gabrielle... the thought comes unbidden to her.
Gabrielle pulls away and watches Xena's expression turn from a smile to a frown. "What is it?" she playfully asks.
"Gabrielle..." Xena begins, knowing full well the hate she surrounded that name with at the start of this day. "I asked for your forgiveness for Solan and Hope, but I don't have the strength to ask for your forgiveness for what I did to you here... Today."
"Xena..." Gabrielle shook her head. "In Illusia, there was nothing but the truth in our song. When I forgave you, I forgave you for everything. And I forgave myself."
Seeing Xena's expression, Gabrielle thinks to herself, Oh boy, here we go again. "Would it help if I told you how much it hurt when you dragged me behind you?"
Xena locked eyes with her as the surf crashed around them. "Yes." she answered weakly.
"Yes it hurt." Gabrielle began, her eyes steely in determination. "It hurt a lot. I remember every second of it." she added as Xena lowered her gaze. "I never dreamed that you would injure me more badly than all the villains we've ever fought. But... But we ended our hurts in Illusia, Xena. It was Solan who showed us the way."
Xena closed her eyes in memory of her son, the son she abandoned. I had no right to blame Gabrielle for his death... Xena mentally berated herself. It's nobody's fault but mine.
Gabrielle paused for a moment as the surf surged around them, sitting up to continue.
"Solan must have seen how our grief drove us apart, and asked Hades to grant us a journey to Illusia." Gabrielle continued, her eyes flashing in wonder at the sky above them. It was nice to be able to see the real sky again. "He never wanted us to hate each other over him, and he helped us find the way out of our misery. It was Ares who-"
"Ares had nothing to do with my decision to kill you." Xena snapped, cutting her off. Then she looked at her bard. "He... didn't force me, didn't control my mind... or possess my body..." Xena continued over the sound of the gulls. "I wanted to kill you... to kill my grief, to wipe away any chance for atonement, to damn myself completely because I knew I deserved to be damned for my crimes."
At Gabrielle's silence, she continued. "Ares was right. Evil is a part of me." the surf crashed before she could summon her next words. "And I am a killer."
The moment was pregnant with emotion, and Gabrielle paused to consider the right words to say to her. The right words... she thought. "Xena, I'm trying to think of the right words to say to you." she paused. "And I want you to think on that, that I am looking for the right words to say to you."
"Xena, I knew from when I first met you that you had a dark side, and that others had always feared and hated you for it. I guess I really didn't know that part of you... until today." It made her think back to her words to Solan, about how that wasn't the Xena she had known.
Xena's expression crinkled into horrified pain. She wanted to lighten the mood with a joke, but didn't feel she had the right to joke with Gabrielle over what she had done.
"Please tell me what you're feeling." Gabrielle prompted, her eyes filled with promise.
"I promised Callisto that I was going to live with my pain..." Xena forced through gritted teeth. "But right now I would rather kill myself than ask you to forgive me for what I did this morning. That's how I feel."
Gabrielle realized from the look in Xena's eyes that she might indeed kill herself right there, depending on the next words from her bard. Funny, Gabrielle thinks to herself. That would have been fine with me before we... drowned.
"You're not going to kill yourself for the same reason that I didn't end my life after... Hope." Gabrielle paused, shattering her own train of thought in remembering what she had done to her daughter. Her own daughter. She shook her head, as if to wave away what she had forced herself to do. The unthinkable. That which had made her hate Xena with all of her being.
"Because this world needs you. I need you..." Gabrielle emphasized by taking Xena's callused hand. "I love you, Xena. And I'll always be here for you."
The sky was pretty dark by now, but nothing seemed brighter to Xena than the light that seemed to shine from Gabrielle's face. She returned her smile, blinking tears out of her eyes and not succeeding.
"I love you, Gabrielle." Xena cooed as the rising surf crashed into them again, and she leaned forward deliberately to give her soulmate a kiss.
Gabrielle returned the kiss with a fervor, and to her it seemed a kiss that lasted beyond life... and death.
Xena parted the connection only when she judged that Gabrielle would need to breathe again, and hugged her tightly to her. To Hades with my guilt, Xena thought to herself, never wanting to let go.
"I forgive you, Xena." Gabrielle whispered in her ear, holding on to her life, her love, all the more tightly.
"Gabrielle..." Xena sobbed uncharacteristically as her voice broke. "I swear by any God you name that I will fall on my own sword before hurting you again. I'm so sorry..."
"Forget the gods, Xena." Gabrielle shushed her with a finger to her lips. It unnerved her seeing Xena like this. "All the gods and goddesses in the world will never break our love, our lives. You are my love, forever."
Having returned to the Amazon village, explained how they "made up" to Ephiny, Joxer, the whole Amazon Nation, (-deep intake of breath-), retrieved Argo, and Gabrielle's fighting staff (-wheeze again-) , Xena and Gabrielle set off towards their next adventure, the best of chums. Their love has shown them that they can overcome any difficulty, as long as they focus on their mutual love and respect.
[Gabrielle clears her throat]
"-Ahem!-" she begins, "Weeeee loooooove... Peace, Peace, Peace! With the Ducks and Goats and Geese! We love Peace, Peace Peace..."
Xena gets the look in her eye from the start of Bitter Suite. As Gabrielle goes into the second chorus, her hand moves inexorably towards her trusty Chakram...
"Steady now." Ephiny orders as her archers ready their bows. She signals again, as she, Joxer, and a dozen spear-maidens approach the lone campfire.
They see a shape writhing under the blanket next to the fire, and Ephiny's belly tenses as she prepares herself for when Xena will inevitably sense their approach.
As they close the distance, the blanket suddenly flies off, revealing two naked, writhing female bodies.
"By the gods, Xena!!" Gabrielle cries to the firmament above as she kindles her passion against her lover.
Ephiny and Joxer both do a double-take and look at each other. Joxer's jaw drops about as low as it could without falling off, and Ephiny looks in shock back at Gabrielle, who, despite a flushed complexion, seems to be none the worse for wear.
Ephiny gives the silent signal for the Amazons to depart, and gapes at the raw passion in full view before them. As Joxer continues staring slack-jawed at the unleashed carnality before them, Ephiny shrugs:
"Well, they fight like minxes, so it follows they @#$% like 'em, too." as she turns to walk off.
"I've failed you, father." the young girl says listlessly as she gazes down the cliff to the two figures far away, who are frolicking on the beach.
A little white dog happily trots up past the abandoned horse, which is grazing on the grass along the edge of the cliff. The tiny dog sniffs along a length of whip tied to the horse until it reaches the end, which is bloody.
"Do you want me to try again?" the child asks, turning towards the dog.
"No!" the dog says to her, its eyes twin orbs of flame. "There is another!"
Hope grins.
| Go To Top | Back to Fiction | jeb66038@pegasus.cc.ucf.edu |
|---|