Riffs for Other Nicktoons
After my initial success for getting Rugrats riffed (check below for the link), I decided to see if other people would riff other Nicktoons. Guess what, I got some riffs (and even a few full-fledged MSTings). I'm presenting them here.
"Some riffs" for a program are pretty useless unless the program is on or has been transcribed so that people don't have to watch it to get some sort of context for the riffs. -- Anataeus Feldspar, in a reply to Jesse Shearer's post on Hey Arnold riffs on the MST3K newsgroup.
Well, I'm presenting them anyway. If you wanna add to my little page, just email me.
Hey Arnold!
Riffs
All the text riffs are by Jesse Shearer. And you know your idea's in trouble when only one person's agreeing to doing it.
Spelling Bee
Helga's dad Big Bob (Maurice LaMarche) saves one space for her (Francesca Marie Smith) on the trophy stand: "Oh, gee, Dad. That was so kind of you..."
Background info: Helga is the school bully on the show... but she has a soft spot for Football Head, as she refers to Arnold (Toran Caudell... he's been voiced by others, so I'll point out when necessary) because his head is shaped like a football. Her older sis (Nika Frost) has won lots of trophies, and, well, let's just say her dad gets along better with sis than her.
Helga's dad gives her a pep talk before the spelling bee; altered lines: "All the other kids have studied. You haven't. We all know the outcome of this."
The actual bee: Are these all real words, or am I just hearing some of them wrong?
Seymour Stump: If I heard that right, I could come up with a dirty joke or two.
Helga's dad tries to bribe Arnold to throw the spelling bee: Hey, what does he think this is? The WWF, or something?
Helga lets Arnold win: Helga throws the fight! Helga throws the fight! Helga throws the fight! ...
Pigeon Man
Chester the Pigeon takes off with the note for Gerald (Jamil W. Smith): Hey, it looks like Chester's been drinking again!
Chester the Pigeon crashes: He's dead, Jim!
After the Legend of Pigeonman (Vincent Schiavelli) is told: Oh, yeah. He can really help.
Arnold (Caudell) visits Pigeonman with Chester the Pigeon:

Arnold (paraphrase): He's sick.
Me, as Pigeonman (Groucho Marx style): He does look a little under the weather. About six feet under, to be exact.

Pigeonman gives Arnold the remedy for his bird: Is he Pigeonman or Dr. Phlox? (Enterprise ref.)
Arnold's friends go to mess with Pigeonman's stuff: It's so hard to understand why Pigeonman doesn't trust people...
The ending: OK, so we switch from Home Alone 2 to Darkman in about three seconds here.
Explanation by Jesse (who else?): "In Home Alone 2, Macauley Culkin's character befriends a homeless lady who's only friends are pigeons, like what Arnold's doing with the guy in this short. And I believe it was the at end of Darkman (starring Liam Neeson), the lead character gives a monologue to his wife where he says that he'll be wherever someone needs rescuing or there is danger and that sorta thing. The pigeon guy in the short did something similar."
And having seen this ep, I can confirm that this is indeed the case.

It Girl
Oh, no, not an Addams Family crossover. But then again, that's every episode.
The teacher Mr. Simmons (Dan Butler) announces the coming of fashion designer Johnny Stitches (Michael McKean): Why do they want to give him a horror show?
Helga complains about how she thinks modeling is just some freak show: She'll fit right in.
Helga, about models being airheads: If she wasn't qualified before, now she is for sure.
The designer gives Helga the job: We all saw that coming, unfortunately.
The modeling instructor at the agency: Is she wearing anything besides that boa above the waist?
Helga's style takes over en masse: Either we've been thrust onboard a Borg Cube or this is Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones.
Helga's attitude stays the same when she becomes famous: Yeah, Helga's a born fashion model.
Helga threatens to be as bad as she can: For her, that's what the rest of us call *being nice*.
Helga goes nice on stage and really throws the crowd: Oh, can we just end this homage to *Zoolander*?
Zoolander is a Ben Stiller film where he plays a not-so-intelligent model. It isn't that good, not least because there's a far-fetched subplot involving an attempt to kill the Malaysian prime minister.
Deconstructing Arnold
Oh, please tell me Woody Allen didn't have anything to do with this... (Referring to Allen's film Deconstructing Harry.)
Sid (Sam Gifaldi) horks his pal's cell phone: Oh, come on, he'll never notice.
"Princess" (Rhonda, voice of Olivia Hack) passes the secret admirer letter to "Curly" (Haley Joel Osment AKA Mr. "I see dead people"): Wait, the Three Stooges are in this?
Harold (Justin Shenkarow) and Stinky (Christopher P. Walberg) weaken Eugene's (Ben Diskin) bike: I hope you all have good trial lawyers.
This day is "Official Dumbass Prank Day" at PS 118 (Arnold's school), it seems.
Arnold (Spencer Klein this time) refuses to help the others when they all come to him and beg for advice: Wow, I didn't know Arnold was a Technomage.
Jesse's explanation: On Crusade, a Babylon 5 spinoff, one of the main characters was a "Technomage," a person who used technology to achieve the effects of magic. While he often answered questions and/or solved pieces of puzzles for the show's lead, there were also times when he gave no answers. But he'd rarely just *say* things like "I can't/won't answer that for you" or "I don't know the answer." More often it would come out as something rather roundabout that could easily be confused with an answer. These would be more along the lines of "There are a myriad of stars, Captain. You must explore for yourself."
Helga tries to give advice, Arnold style, i.e., put the horked cell phone back, blame others for critically wounding a friend and go for the guy as per the fake love letter: Helga's a Clinton Democrat.
As the results are shown: See? Who needs more proof?
Lovesick Helga goes on about how great Arnold is supposed to be: For crying out loud, where's a gun when you need one?
Background: for some odd reason, Helga is apparently in love with the football head. She's trying to keep this crush a secret, though.
The others plot against Helga when her advice fails horribly: I suspect Congress went after Clinton after the Lewinski scandal for similar reasons.
The Little Pink Book
This ep is a prime example of how Helga will do anything to keep her crush a secret.
Arnold (Caudell) & Gerald are scientifically analyzing a page taken out of someone's personal book (as it happens, Helga's)... the page has some hair on it (as it happens, Arnold's own)

Trogdor:
Gerald: Hey, Arnold. According to our research, this is a sample of your pubic hair!
Arnold:...
Nin-Nin69:
Arnold: Is it a boy?! Is it a girl?!
Gerald: Nope, I'm afraid it's both.
Bubblegum Girl:
Arnold: What do you think of my project?
Gerald: I hope this isn't something I'll regret asking....
Synchronized Swimming
Gerald in cowboy outfit, as part of a synchronized swimming routine

The Lizard: "Come on down to the naked cowboy show staring Gerald Johanson"
Nin-Nin69: "Give me $100 and I'll tell you everything thats under the stars."
DianaGohan: This is what happens when you're family's broke and the only thing you're good at is wearing cute outfits and pleasing people.
Stinky Goes Hollywood
Harold auditions for "Yahoo Soda" commercial

Boy Wonder: Yum, tastes like chicken.
DianaGohan: Only a Yahoo doesn't Drink A Yahoo (Kinda like how only a Wacko dosen't own a Wacko, but with Yahoo). (The "Only a Wacko" bit comes from an earlier ep titled "The High Life", with Gerald selling watches branded "Wacko".)
Nin-Nin69: Wait.......this isn't Rolling Rock! You lied to me!
Pre-Teen Scream
Phoebe (Anndi McAfee) is trying on things to wear for when she meets her favorite popstar, Ronnie Matthews (Christian Mena and Bronson Pinchot... the ep has an explanation for the double roles), as she has won a contest to see him

Pokejedservo: Phoebe tried to audition to be on Vh1's "I Love the 70's" interviewee's, granted that didn't work. But hey if "I love the 80's" gets a "Strikes Back" then maybe all hope is not lost eh?
Operation Ruthless
Gerald and Phoebe (in their usual clothing) in front of the mirrors at the Cheese Fair

Pokejedservo: Phoebe (thinking): Hmmm... Be an accomplice for Helga's consistently failing plans or actually have a good time tonight. Choices... Heh, riiight I know what he's thinking.
April Fool's Day
Gerald (whose distinct hairdo has slightly drooped down) and Phoebe dressed up for a school dance...the banner says "GOTCHA", by the way

Pokejedservo: Phoebe: Ummm... Gerald you might want to fix that up. People are starting to stare...
Big Bob's Crisis
Big Bob making quotation marks with his handsBig Bob clutching his chest in pain, a couple moments afterwards
Pokejedservo: Yeah, nice "Parenthesis" impersanation... Pokejedservo: That's nice, sir, but I don't think this is quite "Who shot JR"...
A red swirl over a white background as Big Bob comes out of a hallucination
Pokejedservo: WOULD SOMEBODY GET THAT CANDY CANE LOLLIPOP OFF THE CAMERA!
Trogdor:
  • You WILL slay Godzilla and bring me his dirty pictures!
  • ...and this is the Cat in the Hat's brain on drugs.
alextoon: You are entering a dimension not only of optical illusions, but of the Twilight Zone opening in color.
shogunthethird: my god, it's an extreme close-up of ronald mcdonald's short n' curlies!
Boy Wonder: Its a candy cane swirl! Oh well, 1 month past.
JDWeil: It's an optical illusion. That's really a straight line.
Jaguar: Creeeeeeeeeeemmee Saaaaaaaaaverssssss, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmm.

Timberly Loves Arnold
A rather random pic of Arnold's Grandpa (Dan Castaneletta), looking downwards in an oddly suggestive way Gerald's younger sis Timberly (Avriel Epps) selling lemonade
Pokejedservo:
  • Ladies & gents, now for the million dollar question, which is longer? His nose or his chin?
  • Phil: Man I really DO have the ultimate butt-chin!

Anime Guy: Are my legs down there?
Samurai Karasu: Woah this viagra stuff makes me feel like im 65 again!
shogunthethird: these are the wrinkliest leather pants I've ever worn...waitaminute, I"m not wearing any pants!
Morpheus: Ahhh... Warm...
Brainiac: Grandpa: Why is it almost everything jutting out of my body from neck up is so phallic? Excuse me while I kiss the sky...
Nin-Nin69: "How did those get up there." *puts his chin down his pants*
Kim Burk: "Pee for sale, buy fresh pee here..."
(The sweet... but annoying) Lila (Ashley Buccille) holding a toucan hat over her head: this is just before Arnold swears her off for good
Kim Burk: "Which way to Anthrocon?"

Eugene, Eugene!
Eugene (Blake Ewing here) lying on top of a piano player during rehearsals for a musical titled "Eugene, Eugene!" Helga watching the musical from backstage
Kim Burk: After a hot night of sex. Kim Burk: "I have herpes"

Parents Day
Arnold's Grandma (Tress MacNeille) serving him some beans
Auzzie: "Oops, I think I dropped my teeth"

Beaned
We see Harold, Rhonda, Sid and Stinky through Helga's half-opened eyes
Kim Burk: The last thing a Domino's Pizza sees.

A Day in the Life of a Classroom
Pokejedservo, on the episode as a whole: "Why Hey Arnold! and Reality TV should never mix."
Mr. Simmons wins an award Mr. Simmons crying during the documentary being filmed in his classroom
Nin-Nin69: Loser of the year award. Nin-Nin69: "*sniff*...and then they...*sniff*...and then they took my lunch money."

MSTings
The Kiss That Never Happened, by Jason Wolczanski
Four words: Arnold and Helga kissing. Features some strong language from Gerald, and a brief appearance by his younger sis.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
Brainy's Diary and Who Killed Lila, also by Jason Wolczanski
The first is an excerpt from a fic that basically features Gerald and Phoebe planning on stealing Brainy's (series creator Craig Bartlett) diary, and every time they say "Brainy's diary" there's lightning or something. The other is, obviously, some sort of mystery about (what else?) the murder of Lila. Helping out in the investigation: Helga, Arnold, and resident insect-lover Nadine (Lauren Robinson).
1 2 3 4
The Love Docter, ANOTHER Wolczanski MSTing
Arnold visits psychiatrist Dr. Bliss (Kathy Baker, from "Helga on the Couch"), who happens to be Helga's regular psychiatrist. Watch out for the references to the Hey Arnold! movie.
Sid's Schnoz and Another Black Mark for Nick, by me
Sid dates Rhonda to get a nose job, and some guy writes about problems at Nick involving Craig Bartlett.
Rocket Power
Riffs
Race Across New Zealand
A 5-way split screen showing (from top to bottom and left to right) surf shop worker Tito (Ray Bumatai), owner of said surf shop Ray (John Kassir), nerd Sammy (Gary LeRoi Gray, previously, Sam Suletta), Ray's daughter Reggie (Shayna Fox), and her younger brother Otto's (Joseph Ashton) best friend Twister (Ulysses Cuadra), with the last 3 competing in a team race (thus the uniforms and helmets)... apologies for the substandard picture quality

SilverKnight: "Ew, dude! We're, like, doing an anime shot, only, like, totally horribly drawn!"
"Ahh, my eyes!"
"Voltron rip off! Gross!"
zig793: They make 5 player games now? On one tv?
Zine Dreams
Reggie, wearing rollerblades, throwing a slice of pizza, with Sam standing behind her... they're both in their regular clothes, with adequate safety gear, and it looks a bit as if Reggie is whining Reggie wearing a sign saying "Hello! My name is Lame-O"
shogunthethird:
Otto: Reggie, you got some esplainin' to do
Reggie: WAAAAAAAAH!
DianaGohan: Yeah that's nice Mr. Lame-O, see you later. I'll be here... which is away from you.

Hawaii Blues
Otto complaining about his milkshake to Sammy... it doesn't even fall out of the glass even though he's holding it upside down (once again, they're in their regular outfits)
DianaGohan: Dude, the glass is like half... Dude, I don't know! I should actually learn something... dude!
Nin-Nin69: Hey dude! The budget of this crappy animation has been cut back so much, it's such a hassle to have this malt fall out of the glass.
Boy Wonder: Ew, what is in it? Badger thickness?
Merv Links to Otto
The Rockets' neighbor, Merv Stimpleton (Henry Gibson), in welding mask
shogunthethird: hmmm, kinda lumpy fart....waitaminute, farts don't have lumps..... FARTS DON'T HAVE LUMPS!!!!!
KTF: "Why is my jaw made out of clay?"
DianaGohan: "This helmet makes some people (like two guys) think that I'm cool... almost."
Blue Wolf: One of the original cast members of Battle Star Galactica
For more riffs taken from screencaps of the show, check out "What Did He Say?" from Rocket Power Heat.
The Wild Thornberrys
Riffs
Riffs with no credit are from Pokejedservo.
The Wild Thornberrys Movie
Eliza (Lacey Chabert, of Party of Five) talking to a park ranger... it's dark out Eliza climbing up a rope ladder after Sloan Blackburn (Rupert Everett)
Eliza: Could somebody PLEASE fix the lighting here, I can hardly see a thing!Suddenly I have this feeling that if Eliza had a more normal "scholastic" life, she'd be pretty good safety patrol material don't ya think?
shogunthethird: Eliza to her horror discovered her resucers were Michael Jackson and a bikini-clad Rosie O'Donnell
Anyone00: "What did she step in?!?"
ProdigyCube: "Oh my! I'm stuck in an afro! Good thing somebody is saving me. Cause I was really scared, you know? I mean, I just woke up today and I was inside an afro. Well, lets just say that I'm glad I'm finaly rescued. Goodness, I wonder if I missed American Idol? Oh, shoot! Hmm, maby somone taped it for me. I sure do hope so. Oh wait, crap! And I was 'spose to meet my new boy friend to see You Got Served (a film starring the members of the boyband B2K)! Aw man!"
Eliza's dad Nigel (Tim Curry) getting off their motorbike (wife Marianne, voice of Jodi Carlisle, at the wheel) onto their mobile home, the "Commvee" Shot of a helicopter
Nigel: I think I'll go into the Comvee just for any remotely decent lighting here."This is Traffic Reporting for the Shadow Realm"
Eliza catches the rope ladder hanging from the helicopter Eliza talking to a bunch of turtles
Eliza: Should I be sure that its even SAFE up there?!Even the new TMNT show was made by 4Kids, they still hired Eliza to scout out for talented young turtles. Strange huh?
Eliza and her chimp Darwin (Tom Kane) riding an elephant named Phaedra (Cree Summer... for her credit, she shares Tim Curry's distinction of having been in all 4 of Klasky Csupo's feature productions) Eliza and Darwin getting off Phaedra
Eliza: It's amazing what work you get when you pay for peanuts huh?I don't know why but all of a sudden "Queen" is popping into my head, but I'm sure the reasons are subtle huh?
Eliza's big sis Debbie (Danielle Harris) driving the Commvee, with her grandma Cordelia (Lynn Redgrave) in the background
KTF: Debbie: "Don't worry Granny, we're just going to be making a quick side trip to the nursing home."
DianaGohan: "These kids today with their punk driving and their punk music and their punk driving music that they drive to the... is it nap time now?"
jeffrey 228: "I think she has gone insane because she wants to get out of the country life."
Donnie (Flea, from Red Hot Chili Peppers) has just put some worms in Cordelia's cup of tea
candy17: You know how people say that coffee tastes like mud? Well, I think the people at Nickelodeon carried this idea too far, as seen in this outtake from an episode of "The Wild Thornberrys".
shogunthethird: ...to her horror, lady buttmunche discovered that somehow her cup of tea had been turned into the highly dangerous serengeti teacup-shaped land octopus
Lab_Rat: Winner of the Senior Citizens' Fear Factor!
The Lizard: "My cheese doodles have come ALIVE!"
For more pictoral laughs at the film, check out Sky News' picture gallery of the movie.

Eliza Unplugged
Eliza (with a new hairdo) and Shane (Christopher Masterson)
Lab_Rat: shogunthethird: "for the sake of the relationship, would you please either get a plastic surgeon or a paper bag for your face?"
Beatdigga: "It's true Eliza. You're ugly as hell. I've been dating her for three weeks." "But, why Fujiko? Why her?" "Have you SEEN those knockers?! :-D"
cheezecrunchees:
Eliza: Man, did I used that Mane & Tail thing on my hair, or did I ended up like Justin Timberlake?
Shane: Yeah, but at least you didn't ended up like William Hung or Jasmine Trias, or something.
pinoyLlama_350: Eliza, if you look as ugly as Chuckie Finster, would you tell that shaman guy that you needed to join "Nerd Idol" in order to be beautiful? (...dashing good looks? - nickelodeon)
MSTings
These are by The Last Orbot, Mark Jr Wiesner.
Wild Thornberry Lemon Two Pack
A pair of REALLY sex-heavy fics: one has Debbie using a vibrator and the other has Darwin sucking on Eliza's breasts (except that Eliza's chest is pretty flat). (Both end with Misty of Pokemon getting pregnant... and this is even though she has no role in the 2nd fic.) So if you're sensitive to such fics, don't read them.
Darwin's Replacement
Basically, Darwin gets run over by the Commvee, and gets replaced by Domino's Pizza's monkey mascot. Check out what Eliza does to him.
As Told By Ginger
Riffs
Those not credited are from Pokejedservo.
TGIF
Hoodsey (Tress MacNeille) studying with Carl (Jeannie Elias) Carl's older sis/the show's main character Ginger (Melissa Disney) giving him, wearing a hockey mask, a stern talking
Why ATBG and a REALLY bad Stephen King novel-based movie should never mix...Ginger: For the last time Carl YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BE IN THE NEXT "FRIDAY THE 13TH" MOVIE! Ugh, I can't believe they STILL make those horrible movies.
Carl playing with globe ball... the ball is actually smaller than the pic implies Ginger writing in her diary... it shows as squiggle
  • Carl: Now what will my mentor the Brain do?
  • from Blue Falcon: Roar! Me eat world! Roar!
  • from Nin-Nin69: Nope. I can't locate Spiderman's secret headquarters with this map either.
  • from DianaGohan: First I'll conquer America with my crappy show, and then the world! That is if Rocket Power dosen't do it first.
Who knew that squiggle lines could make such an intresting written language? Huh?
Ginger having dinner at Courtney Gripling's (Liz Georges) mansion Wide shot of the Griplings' dining room... Courtney and her mom (Candi Milo) are visible
Why Beauty & the Beast and ATBG should NEVER mix. Exciting isn't it?
A shot of Ginger's mom Lois (Laraine Newman) Ginger's allergic best friend Macie (Jackie Harris) talking with Ginger
Is it just me? Or does this scene seem a bit '70's-ish?I'm not quite sure I want to know whats going on here...
Ginger talking with Macie... her other best friend, Hoodsey's older sis Dodie (Aspen Miller), is visible at the lower right of the pic
  • Never do they apparently...
  • Upon realizing that Macie wore "square" glasses, Ginger felt differently about hanging out with "squares" (from Kevin P.)

The Fairly OddParents
Riffs
Father Time
Timmy Turner (Tara Strong) riding a scooter... back in time (really)
Kanzel:
Death: [Tosses marbles in the path of Timmy's scooter]
Timmy: Oh no marbles have appeared in the path of my scooter which, after it rolls over said marbles I will loss control of it resulting in my painful death or a least a broken limb or two! AI-YEEE!!
DianaGohan:
"I don't care what the fans say. This IS cooler then a Delorean."

Wanda's Day Off
The words "Don't Worry" appear in some poofs, as Wanda (Susan Blakeslee) takes a day off
Sir T. Ghostal: Don't worry....Don't worry? Gee whiz...I've never thought of it that way. Suddenly my whole life seems better. I feel more...joyful, and....filled with life. I wanna go sing with the birds, and run through beautiful feilds. Don't worry! DON'T WORRY! DON'T WORRY!!!!
Proto DUDE: Augh Omgomgomg There's Stuff To Worry About!

Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius
Riffs
All pictures taken from DVDToons.com
When Pants Attack
Jimmy (Debi Derryberry), his robot dog Goddard (Frank Welker), and a bunch of pantsJimmy holding an apparently home-made gun
Speedy Boris: I prayed to God for the world's pants but I forgot to ask for different sizes! I'm gonna outgrow these in like 4 months! Aaaaagggghhhh!
jeffrey 228: Jimmy prayed to God about why did he have to make so many pants in one night, and why does he have to do this in the first place.
Nin-Nin69: Jimmy prayed that the pants he sewed that night will take life and rip apart his poorly animated body to get out of his contract with Nick.
FredNash:
  • "Don't. Move. You've got a... bug on your face... *BLAM* Got it! ... Oops..."
  • "Have you ever danced with Jimmy Neutron in the pale moonlight?"
shogunthethird:
  • I know what you're thinking punk did he fire six plasma bolts or just five? well this here's an illudium-Q36 explosive space modulator so you gotta ask yourself, "do I feel lucky" well do ya? PUNK?
  • Bid salutations to my diminutive acquaintance! (which translates to "Say hello to my little friend", a classic line from Scarface)
DarthGonzo: Jimmy Neutron holds the Hanna Barbera characters at gun point as he prepares to take over their theme park attraction in Florida.
KurtWagner: Beam me up Scotty!

Hall Monster
Jimmy as Hall Monitor (complete with helmet he invented)

Skeeter: "I told you you'd have to shave your head to get that helmet to fit properly..."
lord dalek: Starsky and Hutch: The Early Years.
shogunthethird: Lucky Bob: Jimmy: Just...act...natural...
Proto DUDE: Six letters, Goddard, my friend: O M G W T F?
Lab_Rat: "The x-ray visor works great. I can see in to the girls locker room, easy! Just what is it I'm looking for anyway?"
For Rugrats riffs, click here.
Back to my main MST3K page.