Ervin Hall was walking through the mysteriously
new town. It had appeared here last night in a blaze of lights and sounds. Now his vision was arrested as he looked at the
strange blue box that had suddenly appeared in front of him. It was quite tall and seemed to have some sort of writing on
it. He blinked and suddenly the words were in his native Derran tongue. Police Public Call Box the large letters near the
top proclaimed. He was about to read the smaller writing on the side panel when the doors opened inwards. He looked up to
see a slender blonde woman smiling at him. She had some sort of large flower attached to the lapel of her dark blue jacket.
"Hi, nice day," he ventured a greeting.
"Yes," the Doctor tossed back her hair, "I think you're right. I don't come here
very often these days; not since the war ended." She offered him her hand. "I'm the Doctor."
"Er Hall, Ervin Hall. Have
you had this vehicle long?"
"For longer than I can remember Mr. Hall." She smiled again. "And that's a very long time but
I hope you think I don't show it at all, hmmm?"
"Not at all miss, ah," he paused, "Doctor." This was definitely the strangest
person he had ever met and from the manner of her arrival she could well be the weirdest.
"Anyway I can't stand here gossiping
all day, well not today at least, perhaps tomorrow? I've really got to be on my way, things to do, evil galactic villains
to stop and ask why they transported Blackpool
fifteen thousand light years across the galaxy. You know how it is; oh maybe you don't." The Doctor wondered where her companions
had got to. "Hurry up you two!" she shouted back into the ship. "We do have a schedule you know. Last one here doesn't get
a mars bar..." She let the words hang and listened to the fast approaching footsteps. "Ah there you are," she said as they
charged past her, both eager to be first. "Now have you both washed behind your ears, hmmm?"
"I'll be going now." Ervin
Hall started to walk away from the obviously insane woman.
"Oh don't go yet, Mr. Hall. Wait one point seven minutes before
crossing the road, it could just save your life."
"Thanks, I'll just stand here and watch the, the, the donkeys go by then,
"If you like, just remember look both ways. I do hope your people learn Splink, it would save such tragic accidents."
With that she was off, closely followed by her two chums down the street. "I remember when all this was caves and mammoths...I
can tell you a few stories about life then."
They arrived at the top of the tower, David and Claire were out of breath
while it seemed as if the Doctor had floated up the many, many stairs. "Now then," she looked around. "If I were an evil genius
where would I hide the bomb ..?"
It turned out there was no trace of any bomb. All that the Doctor found was an envelope
with a question mark on it. She read the letter out loud. "Dear Doctor, my arch nemesis and hateful doer of good deeds. Now
that's as mad an opening line as any I've ever read. The bomb is not here as you may have already discovered. I have hidden
it in one of the small people containers on the largest undulation entertainment feature." She gasped. "It's on that big roller
coaster we passed. We have to hurry."
It cost a small fortune to get into the pleasure beach but they had free
passes for one ride each on the roller coaster. David sat up near the front while Claire took the middle section and the Doctor
took the last few carriages so she could keep an eye on the others.
The bomb turned out to be under the seat of the Doctor's
carriage, carefully she managed to free it using her trusty sonic screwdriver. Zero point two three micro hertz was the frequency
to cause nucleic dissolution of the Neptunium isotope and she was more than relieved when the operation was complete.
there you two are," she showed them the bomb, "very dirty nuclear device. Sometimes I really regret dropping so many large
hints to Einstein and many others like him."
"Where to now Doctor?" Claire asked glumly.
"Well first the Log flume and
then the merry-go-round. I've always had an affinity for merry-go-rounds in this incarnation. After that we'll have to find
a way of returning Blackpool to its proper place in the Universe."