Haana relaxed and rested her broken arm.
It had been a close call, that Kroton had ambushed her and broken the bones before she realised it had even been there. Fortunately
the Doctor had some stuff inside her handbag that melted the strange living crystal creature. At least she got a cool holiday
to recover. The Doctor had wanted to take her to some dreary medical space station, where was the fun in that? At least here
the view was spectacular. She might look at it to once the women’s volley ball match finished.
The Doctor placed
the bowler hat on top of her head and looked at it critically in the mirror for a few seconds. She shook her head and walked
into a different room. She emerged a few seconds later in a completely different outfit; the beige skirt suit had been replaced
by an attractive sleeveless pink top and a flowing long white skirt. However this outfit was deemed inappropriate and a few
seconds later she was wearing another outfit, her favourite crushed green velvet trouser suit and a large posy of orchids
stuffed in the lapel buttonhole.
Haana picked up her home study book and quickly flicked through to the chapter on Astrophysics
just before the Doctor emerged from the TARDIS. “Ah there you are Doctor, I was beginning to wonder. I’m a bit
The Doctor smiled at her companion. The dear was trying her very best, she really was. “What’s
the problem?” She asked, perching on the edge of the other plastic chair. “Astrophysics? Yawnarama. You shouldn’t
have any problems with this, it’s just a load of facts and figures.”
Haana blushed. It was the figures that
had distracted her from the numbers. “Erm, maybe it’s the book. Do you have anything more interesting, something
that would appear to the modern young Time Lady?”
“Nothing by a humanoid species I’m afraid. There is
a text by Teflon of Arcturus that may explain a few things. You just sit there, I’ll go and get it from the library.”
The Doctor patted Haana’s good arm before heading back into the TARDIS.
Haana returned her interest to the game of
volleyball. “Absolutely typical. I break my arm and They send me homework. My life couldn’t get any worse.”
Taking a sip of Pepsi Max, in a non-product placement manner, she closed her eyes and let her thoughts wander.
Baptiste ran over the sand dunes, they were after him, he could feel how close they were now. A bolt of blue plasma sizzled
past his shoulder and struck a sand dune, turning it into a crater of burned glass. All he had taken was a croissant, if he
had known this was going to happen he’d have left the damn thing be and starved to death. At least it would have been
In the distance he spotted a girl sitting out side of a blue painted chalet and he headed towards that, hoping
to cower inside of it, maybe they might even think he was somewhere else.
Haana heard plasma bolts and looked up
to see a raggedly dressed boy, with mousy brown hair, running over the sand dunes towards her. She went to greet him but he
ran straight past her and into the TARDIS. “Hey”, she shouted before she saw what had been chasing him. Quickly
she dived into the TARDIS, picked herself up and closed the doors. Summoning up the strength she dematerialised the TARDIS
into the vortex.
“This is mad.” Jean-Marc exclaimed. “It’s, it’s…I need a lie down.”
watched the boy faint; it was probably for the best she thought before she left to find the Doctor.
had changed outfits several more times on her way to and back from the library when she ran into Haana, literally as she was
dressed in a lycra tracksuit. “Oh sorry Haana.” She helped her friend to her feet.
Haana struggled for her breath. “There’s a strange boy in the console room. He was being chased by Daleks.”
Doctor and Haana headed towards the console room. She looked at the unconscious figure and worried. “Why would Daleks
be pursuing him? It’s not as if he looks threatening. They’ve never exactly been the most hospitable people though.
Maybe we should wake him up. Haana, go and ask him what happened to him.”
Haana gasped. “Oh no. I left my homework
outside. It’ll be exterminated by now.”
“Never mind.” The Doctor laid her hand on Haana’s
shoulder. “It’s not as if you’d done much now is it? Not with that woman’s volley ball game on.”
wrote my name on it.” Haana smiled. “My full name as well. I always write my name on my stuff.”
you once write you name on Claire?” The Doctor asked.
“Yes.” Haana laughed. “Although I’m
not telling you where.” Haana walked over to the kid and nudged him with her foot. “Hey wake up.” She said.
“You’re safe now.”
The Dalek examined the area. “Suspect entered unidentified structure
which then vanished. Supplementary evidence suggests assistance by Gallifreyan female named Haana.”
all evidence back to control.” The Black Dalek ordered as it turned to another Dalek. “Check all databanks for
the name Haana.”
The Dalek examined the looped magnetic tapes before finding a record of the female suspect. “She
is a known associate of The Doctor. She is also a Time Lord and a human.”
“Explain the conflict.” The
Black Dalek ordered.
“Human female Haana Sinclair was genetically altered to become half Time Lord by the former
President of Gallifrey. The Doctor was made to believe that she caused the process but she only completed the final phase
of the process by accident.”
Jean-Marc looked up to see two women. “Where am I?” He asked. “What’s
The Doctor grinned and held out a bag of sweets. “I’m the Doctor and this is my home. What
do you think of it? Oh would you like a jelly baby?”
Jean-Marc tentatively took one; it tasted ok. “I’m
Jean-Marc Baptiste ma’am.”
“Don’t call her ma’am.” Haana quickly advised Jean-Marc.
“Hey you’re French aren’t you?”
“Yes.” The French boy replied. “I’m from
the New France colony.”
Haana but everyone calls me Haana, mainly because it’s easier to say. Why were the Daleks chasing you?”
started to explain how his parents had vanished suddenly and how he had to resort to stealing food to live. “It was
only a croissant but they tried to kill me because of it.”
The Doctor thought things through. “I’m off
to change into something involving trouser legs.” She turned and left.
“I may as well show you to one of the
rooms.” Haana took hold of a reluctant Jean-Marc’s hand. “Come on, I don’t bite. Not guys anyway.”
Black Dalek studied the computer record of Haana. She was not a logical individual. She showed no interest in the opposite
sex and instead formed relationships with members of the same sex. Her report cards from her schools were almost of two different
people. The human school said she showed no interest in intellectual achievement but was captain of the female swimming team.
Her Prydonian report had her listed as one of the more intelligent and capable scholars. The Black Dalek could only conclude
that her genetic modification had also influenced her intellectual capacity. It also suspected that she would be an ideal
candidate to become a Dalek peacekeeper so it issued an arrest warrant for her capture.
Haana poured through the
Arcturan Astrophysics text in her room, while waiting for the Doctor to finish her tour of the TARDIS with Jean-Marc. It actually
made sense, not that the other one didn’t. Just that her mind had been on…higher matters then. So the giant mutant
star goat was a real creature? Well she never. There wasn’t much information on several species, but there were footnotes
describing how the researchers had died. One of them, Jutland, had been turned into a Cyberplanner
by the Cybermen and used in an incident with a massive space wheel. She flicked through texts on nebulae, globular clusters
and galaxies. They were all very informative but not detailed enough, she longed to see them all, at least the ones that weren’t
being used for interstellar wars at the moment.
The Doctor tapped on the door. “It’s only us. This is Haana’s
room, she’s a Time Lady like me but only nicer than the others on Gallifrey. You know Haana already so lets go and see
if we can find you some cake in the kitchen? I think there’s some chocolate somewhere.”
Feeling guilty Haana
stuffed the chocolate wrappers under her pillow. “Just tell him to leave the toilet seat down.” She called out
after the Doctor before checking the sling and relieving the pressure on her neck.
“Do you have any other
family?” The Doctor asked Jean-Marc. “Any grandparents? Aunties, uncles or cousins?”
Jean-Marc replied between bites of cake. “At least none I know about. Mama and Papa never spoke of anyone.”
Doctor took an extra big slurp of tea from her cup. “I think the best thing to do is go back to your planet and ask
a few questions.”
Jean-Marc started to shake. “Back there? They’ll kill me.”
you worry now. Haana and I will protect you, well until people start shooting at us. If that happens follow Haana, she knows
which way to run to safety.” After taking another slurp of tea the Doctor dabbed at the corners of her mouth with a
napkin. “I’d better go and set the co-ordinates. Why don’t you go and have a nap in your room? Haana needs
to study at the moment. She’s got some schoolwork to do.”
Haana read the display on the TARDIS’s
wall sized screen. She had just found something interesting when the Doctor walked in. “Ah there you are.” She
pointed at the screen. “They’re erasing his records from the colony log.”
The Doctor looked at the console.
“You hacked into the colony’s mainframe while we’re inside the vortex? Don’t you know how incredibly
dangerous that is? I’m impressed. So impressed that I’m going to award you a gold star for being clever.”
She produced a small gold star shaped stud and pushed it into the strap of Haana’s dungarees. “Well done.”
grinned. “However there’s something more worrying.” She pushed a few more buttons and a report filled the
screen. “I’m wanted for immediate capture for aiding a criminal to escape justice.”
The Doctor read the
report. “About that gold star.” She said.
“You want it back?” Haana started to remove it.
no.” The Doctor shook her blonde head. “Have another one.” She pinned one on the other strap. “Well
done. Now set course back to the colony.”
“What?” Haana exclaimed. “Why are we going back there?”
find Jean-Marc’s parents of course.” The Doctor replied. “He’s only sixteen, he should be with them.”
Black Dalek checked the warning light. “It is the Doctor’s TARDIS.” It intoned. “Seek, locate, and
capture. Do not deviate.”
Haana slammed the toilet seat down. “Is it so hard to put it back down when
you’ve finished?” She muttered to herself. “Why did God invent blokes anyway? Was it just a practical joke
at my expense? She managed to calm down as she sat there and played a simple game of equations in her mind, playing both sides
of course. She wondered how on Gallifrey others thought it was a complex and challenging feat of thinking. It sometimes describes
as a symphony of math but she preferred to think of it as a rave party for the mind. Finished now she washed her hands before
checking her makeup in the mirror. Passable, she thought to herself before heading back to her room and desciding which outfit
to change into.
The TARDIS landed like a cheap and cheerful special effect and the Doctor soon popped her head
outside before emerging fully. Haana and Jean-Marc followed her before Haana locked the door and popped the key inside her
jeans pocket. “Which way to go first?” The Doctor mused. “Jean-Marc, you’re a local, we’ll let
you tell us where to explore first.”
“Err, well our house was over this way.” He led the two women through
the empty streets towards the empty house. “I came home one day and everything was gone along with the furniture.”
stayed with Jean-Marc while the Doctor had a quick look around upstairs. “We’ll find out what happened.”
Haana promised. “No matter what the outcome is we won’t lie to you or hide the information from you.” Haana
wandered into the kitchen / dining area hoping to see a clue but there was nothing.
“Papa was making a model ship
out of matchsticks here.” Jean-Marc pointed to a patch of floor near one of the walls. “It had taken him years
and it was only half complete.”
“It’s always good to have a hobby.” Haana agreed. “Are you
feeling ok? Not feeling upset or anything?”
“No.” Jean-Marc lied badly. “I’m fine.”
Doctor could not find anything at all upstairs but as she made her way back over to the spiral staircase she spotted a patrol
of Daleks converging on the house. Quickly racing down the metal steps she found Haana and Jean-Marc. “Daleks, coming
this way.” She shouted, trying to keep things simple.
“Lets get out of here.” Haana suggested.
plan.” The Doctor agreed. “Where to?”
“Away from here.” Haana responded.
Jean-Marc started to run for it.
They ran for it, over fences and through hedges, across patios and around swimming
pools. The Doctor had to pause only twice as Haana stopped to talk to topless sunbathing women.
Jean-Marc pointed to a large stone sculpture of a flight of stairs.
“Brilliant.” The Doctor laughed. “I’d
love to see them climb up after us. Where’s Haana?”
“Really?” Haana asked Anne Marie. “Wow.”
Marie screamed as three Daleks crashed through the hedge surrounding her garden before fainting.
ARE MY PRISONER. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO ESCAPE OR YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED.”
“That’s a bad cold you’ve
got there.” Haana joked. “Hey watch where you stick that thing. You could do someone a mischief.”
ME, DO NOT DEVIATE.”
Haana laughed at the Dalek again. “There’s some who might say that’s a little
“YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, ANYTHING YOU DO SAY CAN AND WILL BE USED IN A COURT OF LAW PRIOR
TO YOUR LEGAL EXTERMINATION.”
“The Daleks are wonderful people.”
“THAT IS TRUE, WE ARE VERY…WAIT
YOU CANNOT TRICK US TIME LORD.”
Haana pointed out. “I’m a woman or hadn’t you noticed?”
“ALL BIPEDS LOOK THE SAME TO US.”
you have a sister?” Haana asked.
“REMAIN SILENT HAANA OR YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED.”
you like exterminating people so much? Tell me that and I promise to be quiet.”
“WE WILL EXPLAIN LATER.”
so.” Haana followed the tin plated pepper pots back to their base.
The Doctor and Jean-Marc watched at Haana
was escorted away. “Damn.” The Doctor cursed. “Now I have to rescue her. I wish she wouldn’t get distracted
by semi naked women, it’s just not professional.”
“Maybe we should follow them?” Jean-Marc asked.
“See where they take her?”
“Now there’s a young lad who knows what to do in a crisis situation.
Jelly baby?” The Doctor offered him her bag of sweets. “Go, take two I’m feeling generous.”
are you going to do to me?” Haana pleaded tearfully. “Don’t I get a last request before you kill me?”
WOULD YOU LIKE?” The Black Dalek demanded.
“The cute babe out of the Spiderman movies.” Haana asked.
“Just to comfort me in my final months.”
“UNNACCEPTABLE. WE WILL PROCEED WITH THE INTERROGATION.”
Social security number – three four nine…”
“WE DO NOT WANT THAT INFORMATION.”
do you want then?” Haana shouted.
“WE WANT USEFUL INFORMATION, INFORMATION, INFORMATION.”
don’t know any.” Haana cried out. “I’m an American!”
“RELEASE HER.” The Black
Dalek commanded. “WE’LL EXTERMINATE HER NOW.”
“Wait!” Haana screamed. “Before you kill
me, there are a couple of things I need to know. Firstly what happened to Jean-Marc Baptiste’s parents, what is the
location of the rebel base and was it Reverend Green in the library with the candlestick?”
The Black Dalek turned
its eye stick at Haana. “THE HUMANS YOU REFER TO HAVE EVOLVED INTO A HIGHER FORM OF LIFE. THEY HAVE BECOME DALEKS. THE
REBEL BASE IS AT ALDERBAN AND IT WAS MISS SCARLET IN THE KITCHEN WITH THE LEAD PIPE.”
“Thank you.” Haana
cart-wheeled out of the room before the Daleks could open fire on her. “Phew that was close.” Steadying her balance
she ran for it as quickly as possible.
The Doctor collided with Haana who
ran out of the Dalek base. “Have you put on weight?” The Doctor asked as she got to her feet.
Haana replied as she and Jean-Marc pulled their blonde friend to her feet. “You’re just imagining things. Now
is a good time to run though.”
The three bipeds ran for it as an angry mob of Daleks poured out of the base like
a swarm of silver bees with blue spots and heavy colds.
“The TARDIS!” Haana shouted, pointing to old
blue. “We’ll be safe in there.”
“Not yet.” The Doctor said. “We have to help Jean-Marc.”
coming with us.” Haana replied. “There’s nothing left for him here.”
The Doctor quickly
closed and locked the TARDIS doors and dematerialised the old girl.
“What happened to Mama and Papa?” Jean-Marc
demanded once he was back inside the impossibly large TARDIS.
“I’m sorry.” Haana said. “I wish
I hadn’t promised now. Look you’d better sit down. Your parents have been turned into Daleks. I’m really
sorry ok.” She held him when grief got too much and he broke down into tear. “Let it out, let it all out.”
Haana soothed. “It’s ok to cry. You can stay with us for a while if you want.”
“You seem to have
decided that without asking me.” The Doctor said.
“He needs to be with people Doctor. At least until he can
come to terms with this. You know what I was like after Claire died. No one should have to go through this alone.”
Doctor grinned. “He’s not alone, he’s got us. Just explain the three rules to him once he’s feeling
“Three rules?” Haana asked. “You never told me about any three rules.”
I?” The Doctor enquired. “Well I can tell you now I suppose. One, no rave music at three in the morning.”
Haana exclaimed. “Sorry.”
“Two, leave the toilet seat down.”
“Amen to that.” Haana
“Three, no making cups of tea without asking me if I want a cup first.” The Doctor laughed.