HARVESTER OF SORROW

The ship had never functioned so well.  The Doctor experimented with the landing circuits and they reached their destination right on the nose, if the nose was a little crooked.  Still everything can’t be prefect, can it?  Otherwise where would be the fun in life?

Romana wandered into the console room.  “We should get on with the mission, Doctor.”

The Doctor put a book on Romana’s brunette head.  “Walk in a line for me.”  He backed away.  “Don’t let the book hit the floor.”

Romana took the book off her head and held it in her hands.  “I do wish you’d cease this nonsense.  “We have to locate the sixth and final segment.”

“You’d never have made it at Madame Chancey’s School of Deportment.”  The Doctor commented as he removed the transparent crystal rod from his pocket.  “Without this working right we may never find the last segment.”  He tapped it gingerly on the time rotor.  “Maybe the warrenty’s expired?”

“Give it here.”  Romana took the locator from the Doctor and slotted it into socket in the control panel.  “There we are...its working.”

“We hope.”  The Doctor mused as the column began to rise and fall.  “I do hope you haven’t damaged it Romana.”

Romana let out a sigh of frustration.  “We’ll see when we land.  I’m going to find K9.”  She stormed out of the room as the Doctor began playing with his yo-yo.

He watched them from afar, he saw how they operated, how they worked together.  She was the classic ice maiden, a cold hearted bitch with a put-down for every occasion and he was a loony and a brilliant theorist with limitless ideas and imagination.  He waited until they started to argue, it was inevitable that they would because he had lured them off-course on purpose.

“The locator’s stopped working.”  Romana said to the Doctor.

“Have you tried shaking it?”  The Doctor asked.

“Don’t be ridiculous.”  Romana said dismissively.  “You have to bash it on the console.  Of course, I’ve tried shaking it.”

The Doctor grinned.  “Well as long as you know what you’re doing.”  He licked his finger and put it in the air.  “There’ll be rain later.”

“We should go back into the TARDIS and try again.”  Romana turned to leave, when she felt something sting her behind.  She pulled a silver dart out.  “What’s this?”

The Doctor shrugged.  “Maybe the natives are restless?  You should try to be more open and diplomatic.”  He turned at random and waved.  “Hello, I say.  We mean you no harm.”  He was met with silence.

“We should be going.”  Romana walked into the TARDIS.  “Hurry up, Doctor!”  She shouted as she could barely contain her anger at his stupid antics.

SNAFU

Romana knew that the Doctor was holding the mission back.  Everyone on Gallifrey was watching them, observing their every move and taking notes.  She wasn’t going to let that fool ruin her career like he had ruined his own.  She wasn’t going to be a rebel, a renegade.  She wanted a position of authority, a position of respect and power.

She had to remove the Doctor; it would solve all of her problems.  She liked the simplicity of it, the elegance of the plan unfolded in her mind.  She had to take charge of the situation; she was the only one who could.

She undressed out of her purple silk suit and pulled on a simple while gown and matching heels.  She picked up the chainsaw and was pleasantly surprised to find the tank filled up.  Finally she picked up the electric cattle prod and tested it against herself.  She was pleasantly surprised by how effective it was.

A LITTLE TIME

Ground control to Major Tom, the Doctor listened to music as he stood hunched over the controls.  He tried pulling lever after lever.  Then he pressed buttons by the dozen.  Finally that left the switches and they weren’t much good either.  In the end he determined that there really wasn’t a problem with the ship, rather the problem must lie with the locator.

K9 trundled around the console room.  “Doctor-Master.  We should play chess.”

The Doctor knelt down and picked up his robotic best friend.  “Oh K9 there’s no time for chess.”

“Negative.”  K9 replied.  “It is imperative you fetch the chess set at once.”

“Can’t you just go for a walk instead?”  The Doctor asked.  “You know I always win.”

“Incorrect statement.  This unit has won every game so far.”

“And that’s why we’re not playing anymore.”  The Doctor put K9 back down and returned his attention to the controls.  “K9, we must have been lured off course.”

“Probability high.”  K9 responded.  “Suggest the Master does not talk to the Mistress.”

“Why’s that?”  The Doctor pondered.

“Mistress is acting in an irrational manner, suggesting mental instability.”

“Someone that rational is bound to have a few minor quirks.”  The Doctor replied.  “Look at me.”

“The Mistress tried to cut off my ears with a chainsaw.”

The Doctor huddled up next to K9.  “Oh you poor thing.  Did you go for her leg again?”

“Negative.  This unit was recharging when she attacked.”

SEVEN NATION ARMY

Romana ran down the corridor with the chainsaw held aloft.  She made swipes at imaginary enemies, dismembering them easily.  She laughed as the imaginary blood soaked into the fabric of her gown.  The Shrivenzal shrieked as she drove the chainsaw into its head and she just laughed at its distress.  Huvan and his New Protectorate Soldiers in Valdemar’s Tomb scattered as she ran amok, killing them all.  Xanxia was cleaved in two and all she could do was laugh as the old monarch fell off her throne.  Cessair looked suitably surprised as she held her severed head in her hand by the hair.  She kissed the forehead and laughed again as it rolled down the corridor like a football.  The Tong armies of the Hsien-Ko didn’t stand a chance as she massacred them all easily.  The Jarakabeth called Crowley egged her on from the side-lines until she noticed him and threw the chainsaw right through the half-time orange he was holding in front of his chest.  Count Grendel tried duelling with her but he was no match for her expertise with the chainsaw and she ran him through after only a few moments sport.  The giant squid, Kroll, was carved up into huge piles of sushi and still she wasn’t satisfied, she wanted to kill again and again and again.  Romana howled with delight as she burst into the console room…

INVISIBLE TOUCH

The Doctor stood safe and secure behind the force field.  He watched as Romana ranted and raved, she was completely psychotic – consumed by her own bloodlust.  He tried to calm her down, by talking, but it didn’t work.  Nothing he said worked, if anything he was making things worse.  “Listen to the sound of my voice.  You don’t want to hurt me, not really.”

Romana grinned.  “Do you want to come out to play?  We can play dead.  You go first; I’ll count to ten and try to kill you.”  She lunged at the Doctor again but she couldn’t get near him, something was stopping her.  “Don’t you want to play?”

“Now K9!”  The Doctor called out.

K9’s nose barrel extended and he fired a blast of stunning energy at the Mistress.  “Blaster ineffective.”

“Fire again!”  The Doctor called out.  K9 fired again and this time Romana fell to the floor.  “Well done K9!”

Romana twitched as she tried to get to her feet but her arms and legs didn’t seem to work right for some reason.

HIGHER GROUND

Romana opened her eyes; she saw the blurry face of the Doctor looking down at her.  “What happened?”

“There’s no easy way to say this Romana, you had a psychotic episode.”

“Be serious Doctor.”  Romana tried to sit up but she was tied down to the bed with several skipping ropes.  “Let me go.”

“We won’t let you go, will we K9?”

“Negative.”  K9 replied.

“I’m perfectly fine.”  Romana replied.  “What do you mean I had a psychotic episode?”

K9 extended his sensor probe.  “Detecting trace amounts of a mind altering substance in the Mistress’ body.”

“You were stung by something.”  The Doctor mused.  “It must have injected the substance into you.”

“Suggest continued confinement and observation.”  K9 said to the Doctor.

“I feel perfectly fine.”  Romana said to the Doctor and K9.  “Cross my hearts.”

“We’ll be back in an hour.”  The Doctor picked K9 up and carried him out of the room.

Romana let out a grunt of frustration and tried to struggle out of her bonds.  “Will you untie me?”

THE ONE

The Shadow cackled as he watched the Doctor and his pet robot walking away.  “His trust in her has diminished.  Soon I will have all six segments for you my Master.”

The Black Guardian laughed.  “Are you so sure of your victory?”

Shadow nodded.  “I am, I will defeat this Doctor easily.”

“Then take charge of the Atrios/Zeos conflict.  Eliminate one side or the other and draw the opposition into its own annihilation.  The chaos will be supreme.”

“I shall eliminate all life on Zeos at once; the carnage will be your most glorious gift from your humble servant.”