Medical report, SMITH, JOHN, by Zoe McCrimmon MD 03/06/2006

Patient John Smith was brought into the accident and emergency department of St. Gallifrey’s hospital on Saturday 03rd June 2006 by paramedic team responding to a hit and run accident.  John Smith was unconscious and displayed significant injuries concurrent with such a collision.  Patient’s left arm was broken in three places and the shoulder dislocated.  Patient’s right leg was broken in two places one of which was an incomplete break leaving numerous bone fragments embedded in the flesh and protruding from the skin.  Complications arose during surgery to repair the damage but the leg was saved thanks to an arterial graft performed by Leonard McCoy MD.  John Smith shows a good recovery but his pulse remains rapid and his core temperature is dangerously low.

Physically John Smith is a plump Caucasian male of 211 pounds, with blonde curly hair and blue eyes of a shade I’ve ever seen before.  Patient’s belongings reveal little of his origin; he was wearing some sort of theatrical costume, maybe ‘Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcoat’?  His pockets revealed an odd-assortment of artefacts from a broken watch to a packet of fish-shaped fizzy jelly sweets.  Patient carried no identification, hence he was assigned the John Smith nomenclature until he recovers or he is identified.  Police are waiting to interview the patient to see if he recalls any information about the accident.

Psychological report, SMITH, JOHN, by Dorothy Chaplet PHD 09/06/2006

Patient John Smith is a deeply disturbed individual.  He claims to be an alien visitor to this planet, but when confronted with his human appearance he passes it off as coincidence.  He claims to have a travelling companion; a Melanie Bush whom he claims is a friend and no more.  Clearly he thinks that creating such a grand sounding introduction will elevate their sexual relationship to something higher and nobler.  He claims to have two hearts but his medical report, as well as x-rays confirm that he only has one heart.  The patient claims to have extensive knowledge of alien planets and species but his fantasy creations all fall into two groups: those that clearly look like humans and those that look like people in rubber outfits.  I have taken great care to try not to burst this fantasy construct, as I feel that if confronted with the truth before he’s ready to deal with it then John Smith will fall into a state of psychosis from which he will never recover.  He claims to have had several different appearances in the past and from his crude drawings it has become apparent that he has based them on famous television and movie stars.  When pressed to detail the process of this process of change which he calls regeneration, he becomes angry and aggressive.  His childish tantrums are obviously a defence mechanism designed to keep people from finding any cracks and holes in his fantasies.  I feel that I must recommend further counselling to discover the source of these fantasy creations.  What sort of trauma has he been through to develop such barriers of isolation?  This Melanie he speaks of may be the only link between him and reality.  I think perhaps passing information about her to the police may result in locating her and thus bringing the patient closer to a recovery.

Extract of meeting between SMITH, JOHN and SMITH, JOANNA 11/06/2006

For ease of reference John Smith is labelled SMITH and Joanna Smith is labelled JOANNA.

SMITH: Who are you then?

JOANNA: John, darling, don’t you recognise me?  I’m your wife.

SMITH: Don’t be absurd.  I am known as the Doctor.  I am not this John Smith or any other alias you wish to label me with.  I am a Time Lord, from the planet Gallifrey.

JOANNA: We live in Hammersmith, you’re a solicitor.

SMITH: I am nothing of the sort.  I travel through time and space with my companion Mel.

JOANNA: Melanie is our daughter, she got married last year.  You were so proud of her all during the ceremony that you couldn’t stop smiling.  Can’t you remember anything?

SMITH: My memory is not at fault.  I haven’t seen you before in my life.

JOANNA: Please, John, can’t you remember anything?

SMITH: I’m sorry, but I can’t see what any of this has to do with me.  Obviously you’ve mixed me up with someone else.

At this point Joanna Smith broke down in tears and was escorted out of the room.  The coincidence between John Smith’s real name and the assumed pseudonym is meaningless but a source of curious synchronicity.  John Smith remained emotionless when his wife began to get upset, only becoming emotional when later presented with photographs of the wedding ceremony referred to by Joanna Smith, which he decried as fakes and then demanded to know the whereabouts of his daughter.

Medical report, SMITH, JOHN, by Liz Grant MD 13/06/2006

I was referred to the case by my colleague Zoe who could no longer continue with the case due to a confrontation with the patient, where he insisted that they had a shared period of contact in the past.  Zoe was shocked by the depth of the patient’s forcefulness that she feared for the safety of herself and her unborn child.  On Tuesday 13^th of June 2006 I found John Smith to be a curmudgeonly man of stubborn arrogance and egotism.  He tried to insist that we had a past relationship together but I ignored his manipulations and he soon relented.  He seems to have recovered from his accident and I cannot find any medical reason why he should remain in St. Gallifrey’s hospital.  The patient demanded to be released but given his mental instability I cannot agree to that at all and instead with Dr. Chaplet I recommend that he be transferred to the Magister Memorial hospital for treatment of his condition.

Psychological report, SMITH, JOHN, by Dorothy Chaplet PHD 15/06/2006

Since the transfer to Magister Memorial hospital John Smith has shown little progress.  I feel that we have reached an impasse and to progress further we need to apply some force to the patient’s fantasies that shield him inside his imaginary world.

Psychological report, SMITH, JOHN, by Dorothy Chaplet PHD 19/06/2006

I have had some success with John Smith.  This morning Melanie Bush appeared in reception, demanding to see her father.  I explained the situation in depth with her and agreed that perhaps she was the key to his recovery as his fantasies seemed to revolve around the bond shared between father and daughter.  I of course was wrong in my earlier diagnosis of seeing Melanie as sharing a sexual relationship with the patient; clearly the parental bond is asexual as Melanie speaks of great affection for her husband Sabalom.  Melanie also spoke of her younger sister Peri, of whom John Smith has mentioned only once.  I agreed to let Melanie meet her father tomorrow under carefully controlled conditions.

Extract of meeting between SMITH, JOHN and BUSH, MELANIE 20/06/2006

SMITH: Mel?  At last, my dear girl.  I had feared the worst.  I suspect we’re not alone.

MELANIE: Daddy, I’m so glad to see you.  I feared the worst when I heard the news.

SMITH: Not you too Mel?  This will not do at all.  You can’t just use my friends like this.  I won’t let you use them like puppets, do you hear me?

MELANIE: What are you on about Daddy?  What do you mean?  Who are you talking to?

SMITH: Why my very best enemy of course.  The Master.  Who else would go to all these lengths just to humiliate me?  Using the names of my former companions was a low trick.  His capacity for self delusion is matched only by his arrogance.  We have to get out of here Mel and stop him.  He’s up to something and until I find out what I’ll never be satisfied.  I’m one cat that curiosity won’t see coming.

MELANIE: Oh Daddy, I’d hoped you’d recognise me.  I’m Melanie, your daughter.  Don’t you remember taking me fishing when I was eight?  I didn’t want to but we ate ice cream and chips and then we went to the Psychic Circus and then we bought a fresh fish from the supermarket and Mummy found us out because it was pre-filleted but she was also happy when I told her that it was the best day out ever and Peri was upset because she wanted to see the circus too but she was only three and to young to go.

SMITH: None of that ever happened.  We went fishing Mel, but we never went to any circus.  Last month, don’t you remember the Sea Devils and the plot to invade Blackpool?

MELANIE: Don’t you remember anything Daddy?  That time we took the TARDIS to Cromer and you thought it was the inside of a black hole?

SMITH: You’re starting to remember things Mel.

MELANIE: No, I’m Melanie, I’m a married woman.  I’m three months pregnant.

SMITH: I’m sorry Mel but you’re single and you never met Peri.  This is all an illusion.  You were hypnotised by the Master.  You can break free though, you can, you’re strong enough to fight him Mel.  Resist, resist.”

MELANIE: I remember everything Doctor.  What have they done to us.  What did they do to my mind?  I remember now, a table and a saw, they cut my head open and started cutting pieces out of my brain!

SMITH: Now I’m really angry!

MELANIE: They held me down and implanted me with an alien foetus.  They did things to me Doctor.  Terrible things.  I want to forget Doctor.  I want to forget the things they did to me.

SMITH: Shush now Mel.  I’m here.  I won’t let anything happen to you again.  I promise.

Alas things went horribly wrong with the session and Melanie became sucked into the fantasy world her father created.  Her repressed false memory syndrome is obviously a delusion and needs to be corrected.  I fear that she too has become a psychotic fantasist and without extreme treatment, maybe even a lobotomy, then she will never recover.  Report ends.

Extract from security camera footage 20/06/2006

SMITH: Down here Mel.

MELANIE: Are you sure it’s the Master?

SMITH: He’s responsible for implanting those false memories in your mind.  It’s his calling card you see.  He corrupts everyone he comes into contact with.  Who else could it be Mel? 

MELANIE: With you, just about anyone I can imagine, and many more besides.

SMITH: I shall choose to take that as a compliment.  This way I think.

MELANIE: This is the ladies room, Doctor.  You’re not a woman.

SMITH: I might be one day Mel.  Regeneration is a random series of genetic changes.  Anyway, my keen sense of direction is playing up today.  Yes, I think it may be some sort of generalised psionic interference field.  That must be it.  We must find the way out.

MELANIE: We can’t let you go outside like that!

SMITH: Yes, it does lack my sartorial elegance.  Bright green is not me.

MELANIE: Also everyone can see your…

SMITH: Yes, yes.  No time for minor irritations now.  I sense that we’re onto some great scheme of the Master’s.  All this is a massive diversion to take the focus away from what he’s really up to.

MELANIE: He’s so cunning he’d get dizzy if he tried to walk in a straight line.

SMITH: Who told you that?

MELANIE: You did, after the Rani imprisoned us in that cellar.  You recounted your previous encounter between you, her and the Master.  She sounds much more likeable than you make her out to be you know.

SMITH: I said that?  I must have been drugged.

Transcript of meeting between Liz Grant MD, Dorothy Chaplet PHD and William Magister PHD 21/06/2006

GRANT: How can the patient and his daughter escape?

CHAPLET: Security camera revealed that Smith broke into the laundry room and then they stole a car from the car park.  Apparently she’s a professional car thief judging by the short amount of time it took her to get into the car.

MAGISTER: That’s not the important thing right now.  Our number one goal must be a blanket media alert to find these two and return them here for treatment.  We must use the media’s tools to our advantage now, before they are turned against us.

GRANT: I’ll prepare photographs of them.

CHAPLET: I’ll give them the usual nonsense about not approaching them and calling for the police.  It always works.  We can let the police do our work for us.

MAGISTER: Yes, I agree.  We must let John Smith and Melanie Bush believe that they have earned their freedom, until they can be safely trapped by a police snatch and seize scenario.  How is our other patient?

CHAPLET: Joanna Smith is beginning to have doubts that she is John Smith’s wife.  She claims never to have married or had any children.

MAGISTER: Perhaps I should have a talk with her?  I remember our first chat together, before you interviewed her Dr. Chaplet.  She seems to respond well to the sound of my voice.  I think that by this afternoon I’ll have reminded her of her marriage and her two daughters.

GRANT: I can always bring in the second daughter for a meeting if necessary.

MAGISTER: Not at this time.  We don’t want to put the whole family under so much duress now.  However it is something to bear in mind later.

Police Interview with Joanna Smith, WPC Polly Lopez Interviewing Officer 22/06/2006

WPC LOPEZ: This must be hard on you Mrs. Smith.

JOANNA: Please, call me Joanna.

WPC LOPEZ: We just need to ask you a few questions.

JOANNA: I already told that nice detective everything last week.

WPC LOPEZ: Who did you speak to?

JOANNA: He called himself Dangerous Davies.

WPC LOPEZ: Oh, that’ll be Pete.  All the girls have a crush on him at the station.  He was asking you about your husband and your daughter.

JOANNA: Yes, he was asking what sort of people they were.  I told him that until the accident they were both normal people.  My husband is a respected solicitor.  He always had time for his kids though, and me.  Melanie went to university, came top of her class she did.  We were ever so proud when she graduated.

WPC LOPEZ: I need to ask you about the sorts of places they might go.  Where they might go to if they were scared.  Is there anywhere special you can think of?

JOANNA: Not off hand, but I guess maybe my father-in-law’s allotment.  They both spent some time there when Melanie was a teenager.  Alistair, he made me call him Dad but I liked the name Alistair a lot.  Well he had a heart attack you see and it was only half way into the growing season for his leeks and so John and Melanie went over every other day to tend to them.  They won third prize too, and Alistair pretended to be upset, said that John had cost him first prize, but it was the way there were.  Always joking about.  After he died well John took over the allotment, keeping it going was a way of remembering his dad I suppose.  Melanie lost interest when she started dating her first serious boyfriend Billy his name was.  Never did get his last name.  Anyway Peri wouldn’t have anything to do with the garden and in the end we had to let it go, but he always did like that old place.

WPC LOPEZ: Thank you very much Mrs. Smith.

JOANNA: My pleasure dear, would you like a cuppa, I’m putting the kettle on anyway and you look like you need a good brew on a day like this.

WPC LOPEZ: Thanks, it’s blowing a gale out there.  I blame global warming.  Two days hot, two days cold.  That’s not the sort of summer we had when I was a kid.

JOANNA: Oooh I know love, every year we’d get a good fortnight’s sun this time of year.  We’d always take the girls to the seaside.  Some years we even got a chalet for the day, well I didn’t want the girls burning their arms and legs in the sun.  Sun cream didn’t last long in the water then and they loved a splash about.  When they’re young it’s hard keeping up with them sometimes.

WPC LOPEZ: I’d better be off Mrs. Smith.  I’d better pass this information on to Pete.

JOANNA: You want to get that young man now, before he marries someone else.  Believe me they’re as much hard work finding as they are keeping.  We have sex three times a week and twice on Sundays.

WPC LOPEZ: Erm, yeah, ok.  I’ll undo the top two buttons of my uniform and hope he asks me for a drink after work.

JOANNA: I remember one time we took a cruise around the shores of Lake Rassilon.  Just myself and my companion Haana.  Wait a minute I’m not single, or am I?

Police Press Release by Detective Inspector Victoria Bell 22/06/2006

The following escaped mental patients are wanted in connection with a car jacking in East London yesterday afternoon.  John Smith was hurt in a hit and run accident earlier this month which left him with serious mental trauma and is considered dangerous and highly unpredictable.  Do not approach this man, call the police at once.  Melanie Bush the daughter of the John Smith broke her father out of hospital and drove the stolen car away to the west.  She is also to be considered dangerous and violent after she attacked a psychiatrist involved with the treatment of her father.  When Melanie Bush tried repeatedly to interfere with her father’s treatment she was diagnosed with a low-grade psychosis and attacked Dr. Elizabeth Grant when she tried to sedate her.  We urge members of the public and the media to be aware of these two and to report any information to our helpline at once.  The incident helpline number is: 0718118055.

Digitally enhanced CCTV surveillance footage 22/06/2006

SMITH:  This way Mel, we need directions to find the TARDIS

MELANIE: Are you sure Doctor?

SMITH: I was run over by a car shortly after I moved it.  Still it shouldn’t be hard to find.

MELANIE: Who should we ask first?

SMITH: Anyone who’s seen a large blue police box of course.

MELANIE: Oxford Street.

SMITH: Are you sure?

MELANIE: No, there’s one in Oxford Street.  I remember seeing a news report about it on a programme about the police through the years.  I hoped I’d see one that looks just like the TARDIS and they have one in Oxford Street.

SMITH: Then that is where we must begin our search.  We have to discount the most obvious solution first.

MELANIE: Great, we can get you some new clothes too.

SMITH: I was just getting used to these too.

MELANIE: Bright pink and purple are not you Doctor.

SMITH: Oh, if I must.

MELANIE: Besides you’re very easy to spot in that outfit.  We have to remain inconspicuous.  I’ve seen episodes of The Bill.  I know how the police work.

SMITH: My dear Mel, it’s nothing like they portray on the television.  Fiction is a lot less real than reality and I should know, I’ve been there a few times.

MELANIE: You’re making less sense than usual.

SMITH: No time for existentialist philosophy now my dear Mel, we are being observed.  That camera is following us.

MELANIE: I can hear sirens.

SMITH: Yes, that was what alerted me to the possibility that we were being monitored.  The Master is being particularly clever today.

MELANIE:  They’ve all got guns!

SMITH: It’s a fair cop.

MELANIE: Don’t

Statements from Arresting Officers PC Harry Lee and WPC Tegan Wright 7.01h 23/06/2006

PC LEE: The suspects initially resisted when challenged to surrender themselves to police custody.  The male was struck in the shoulder by one of my colleagues and the female covered him with her body and indicated to us that they surrendered.  They were arrested and I accompanied the male to the nearest hospital for treatment for his injury.

WPC WRIGHT: We confronted the suspects outside River Island and challenged them to accede to our authority and let us take them into custody to take their statements.  The male protested his innocence and tried to walk away but he was shot in the shoulder and he collapsed.  The female screamed loudly and threw herself dramatically over the male’s prone body.  I arrested them both and agreed to take the female, Melanie Bush, to the police station to take her statement.

Transcript of Audio Taped Confession of Melanie Bush 15.12h to 15.19h 23/06/2006

WPC WRIGHT: Interview with Melanie Bush twenty third of June 2006, time 15.12h.  For the record can I have your full name?

MELANIE: Sure, it’s Melanie Georgina Bush.  Call me Mel though.

WPC WRIGHT: And your occupation, Mel?

MELANIE: I’m sort of between jobs right now.  I used to be a computer programmer.

WPC WRIGHT: And your relationship with Mr. John Smith?

MELANIE: You mean the Doctor.  He’s just a friend.  We travel about a lot.

WPC WRIGHT: The records show that he’s in fact your father.

MELANIE: Hardly.  My father left me when I was a little girl.

WPC WRIGHT: Records show that you also have a younger sister.

MELANIE: I’m an only child.

WPC WRIGHT: I have photographs of you two.

MELANIE: Those are fakes.  That’s Peri.  I saw a photo of her once.  She travelled with the Doctor for a time.  She married King Ycarnos of the planet Thoros Alpha.

WPC WRIGHT: Your mother is very worried about you Mel, as is your husband.

MELANIE: Husband!?  I hardly think so.  I’m not the marrying sort, believe me.

WPC WRIGHT: Are you denying that this is a picture of your wedding day?

MELANIE: That’s a fake.  My face super imposed on another woman’s body.  That’s clearly not me.

WPC WRIGHT: I think we’ll take a break here.  Interview paused 15.19h.  I’ll bring you a cup of tea if you like.

MELANIE: Sure.

WPC WRIGHT: Ooops, this is still recording.

Extract of CCTV Footage from Moon Hill Police Station 15.24h to 15.27h 23/06/2006

The following transcript was taken from footage recovered from the archives

MELANIE: How’s your shoulder?

SMITH: Fine, they managed to operate on me without killing me.

MELANIE: As long as you’re fine.

SMITH: I am not fine.

MELANIE: Keep your voice down Doctor.

SMITH: I have been shot and operated on by primitive backward savages without a basic understanding of medical science or Gallifreyan physiognomy.

MELANIE: At least we’re free now.  You suit that uniform you know.

SMITH: I’m hardly the centre of attention though.

MELANIE: That’s the general idea.

SMITH: Oh, I see.  Well you look nice in that uniform too.

MELANIE: I’m so sorry I had to hurt that WPC, she was only doing her job.  Now I have a criminal record Doctor.  How can I ever get a job anywhere on Earth now?

SMITH: There’s limitless opportunities out there Mel.  A billion worlds visible in your night sky alone.  Further out there’s even more, billions upon billions of worlds.  We can visit them all Mel.  That’s the great adventure.

MELANIE: Yes, that’s what I like about being with you the most.  Seeing new worlds, meeting new people, although it does seem that we do run into an awful lot of alien invaders and tyrannical despots.

SMITH: Yes, sadly that’s one constant the Universe can do without.  But where ever there’s evil there’s us to fight it and we always win.

MELANIE: Yes Doctor, we always win.

SMITH: Thank you for your vote of confidence WPC Plod.  However, this situation with the Master has puzzled me somewhat.  His interest with the Earth has always alarmed me.  Many times he’s tried to turn your world into the base of a vast army which he intends to use to conquer the universe with.  I like your world because of it’s diversity and it’s people but he seeks to destroy everything beautiful and special and replace it with cold metal halls of weapons and mindless slaves.  I cannot allow this Mel.  I feel a final reckoning is building between us both.  I fear that only one of us will survive a final encounter between us.

MELANIE: We’ll beat him Doctor, I know we will.

Statements from Arresting officers PC Harry Lee and WPC Tegan Wright 16.43h 23/06/2006

PC LEE: He spent two hours in surgery and then remained unconscious for another five hours.  When he regained consciousness I re-read him his rights as he denied hearing them the first time and informed him as to his situation.  He became animated and had to be sedated by the ward doctor.  The patient then seemingly lapsed into unconsciousness but when we least expected it he accosted me and struck me on the head with a bedpan before escaping.

WPC WRIGHT: We let her sweat a bit in the holding cell and we reckoned that seven hours was enough to force her cooperation.  Initially the female was co-operative, as can be heard on the audio tape of her confession, but soon she began to be uncooperative when I tried to get her to admit to her crimes.  I was taking a comfort break when the female escaped from the interview room and assaulted me.  She stole my uniform and walked out of the police station calmly with her accomplice.  Although I didn’t see anyone else I did hear a male voice, which I later identified as belonging to her male accomplice.

Extract of CCTV Footage from Magister Memorial Hospital 24/06/2006

SMITH: We want to speak to Professor Magister.

MELANIE: How do you know that’s the Master?

SMITH: It’s an old alias, his ego is without limits.  Besides Magister is Latin for Master.

MELANIE: I only studied French, Italian and German at school.

SMITH: Most people don’t bother learning another language until it’s too late.

RECEPTIONIST: You already have an appointment to see Professor Magister on floor six Mr. Smith, as well as Mrs. Bush.

MELANIE: This doesn’t sound good and I am not married, for the last time.

SMITH: Indeed not, but we won’t find any answers down here.  I’m afraid we’ll have to play the game according to the Master’s rules, for now.  Pay no attention to these little games, the Master is just toying with you to get to me.

MELANIE: Maybe, but while you’re distracted he’s getting to you too.

SMITH: We should go.  I don’t want to keep the Master waiting.

MELANIE: Look, the lift’s arrived.

SMITH: You take that Mel, I have a better idea.

MELANIE: I’ll wait for you up there.

SMITH: Walk, up all those stairs?  Oh now my dear Mel, I shall fly.

MELANIE: Last one to the top buys the salad for lunch.

SMITH: I think that policewoman’s uniform is going to your head.

Footage jumps to the arrival of the lift on floor six.

MELANIE: First one here.

SMITH: You took your time.

MELANIE: What?  How?

SMITH: That would be telling my dear Mel.

MELANIE: Can you really fly?

SMITH: Be realistic Mel, if I could do you think I’d have been defeated by the Hawkmen?  If it wasn’t for Princess Falcona we’d both be dead long ago.

MELANIE: Well here’s the office.

SMITH: Come on then, don’t keep us waiting.

MELANIE:  I’m going in.

SMITH: No, it could be a trap!

MAGISTER: Oh my dear Doctor, you have been naive.

SMITH: What have you done to Mel?

MAGISTER: A simple dose of a highly unusual neuro-chemical inhibitor.  Unless you do as I say she’ll die.  I have the antidote and I’ll cure her if you promise to help me.

SMITH: Help you?  Don’t be ridiculous.

MAGISTER: I’m offering you an alliance Doctor.  I was going to simply kill you and be rid of you but if we work together then we can defeat them.

SMITH: Defeat who?

MAGISTER: Why the aliens who have infiltrated Earth and taken over every strata of government.  They’re everywhere Doctor.  That’s why I had to create phantom pasts for yourself and Miss Bush.

SMITH: Whatever do you mean?

MAGISTER: Muloz, thousands of them.  They have genetically modified themselves to look human but their minds are concerned with only one thing, turning the Earth into a larder.  When the rest of their people arrive then they will begin to feed.

SMITH: Why would you want to protect the Earth?

MAGISTER: I’m protecting my own interests Doctor.  The Muloz are immune to hypnotic suggestion.

MEL: So you’ve met your match then.

SMITH: If you can’t have the Earth then no one else can?

MEL: How childish can you get?

MAGISTER: Your prattlings do not interest me.  Are you going to help me or not?  After all saving these bumbling cretins is rather your responsibility after all, is it not?

SMITH: How can I trust you?  You’ve never done anything but try to destroy humanity or pervert it into a monstrosity.

MAGISTER: Lets just say that I cannot countenance a rival to my plans for the Earth.  At least we know where we stand with each other.  We’ve defeated each other many times, but these creatures are relentless.  Only with our combined skills and intelligence can the Earth be saved.

SMITH: Alright, I’ll help you, but only if you save Mel first.  Release her from that vile potion and restore her to her normal sensibilities.

MAGISTER: You have my word Doctor, as a respected opponent.  I will not betray you before the Muloz are defeated.

SMITH: I was hoping for something more concrete than that.

MAGISTER: Very well, my word as a Time Lord.  The last time I gave that I was telling the truth and you betrayed me to the Cybermen.

SMITH: You deserved it too, but that’s in the past now.  I came here to defeat you.  If you try anything then I’ll be forced to summon the High Council and have them deal with you.

MAGISTER: Then we both understand each other.

SMITH: We have a deal.

MAGISTER: Who’d have ever thought that two such bitter enemies would ever work with each other again?

MEL: I can’t believe you’d trust that monster.

SMITH: Do have a little faith Mel.  I do know what I’m doing.

MEL: He’ll betray us and try to kill us.  I know he will.

Police Press Release by Detective Inspector Victoria Bell 25/06/2006

As you will all be aware now escaped terrorists John Smith and Melanie Bush are at large in the Greater London area.  They have taken Professor William Magister hostage and were last seen escaping in Professor Magister’s car, a black Jaguar with the private registration number MA 5T3 R.  If John Smith and Melanie Bush are watching then I say to them: it’s not too late to come forward.  There’s no need to harm William Magister.  He’s a family man with three children.  Give yourselves up at a police station or contact the police with details of where you can be found.  We want a peaceful outcome, there’s no reason to hurt anyone else.  Just let William go and you’ll be treated fairly.  We don’t want to use force but we will if you leave us no other choice.  The public are not to approach the two suspects, they are now considered to be highly dangerous and they are capable of great physical violence if provoked.  We also regret to report the death of WPC Tegan Wright who died of her injuries last night.  Her parents and boyfriend were with her when the life support machine was switched off.  WPC Wright was brutally attacked as you know by Melanie Bush, however her family urge Mrs. Bush to come forward now and give herself up.

Transcript of Radio Transmissions on Police Frequency Three 25/06/2005

The following conversation was recorded between two police vehicles.

PC 1: Got a possible sighting of female suspect on Faversham Road in Putney.

PC2: We’re in the area, we’ll investigate.

PC1: She’s the bitch who killed Tegan Wright.

PC2: Roger that.  We’ll keep the gloves off for this one.

PC1: I doubt Scotland Yard will care too much if she’s roughed up a bit.

PC2: I see her now.  It’s her, it’s the suspect.  We’ll take her down now.

PC1: Let us know how it goes.

There was a two minute delay when nothing happened.

PC1: Did you get her, over?  Hello?  Did you get her?

PC2: Listen very carefully to the sound of my voice.  I am the Master and you will obey me, you will obey me.

The suspect known as ‘Master’ was later identified as Professor William Magister.  He ordered the occupants of the panda car to lock themselves in their car and throw away the key.  There was no more reply from the first panda car.  They were later found handcuffed and unmoving.

Transcript of Security Camera Footage, 10 Downing Street 25/10/2006

The following security camera footage shows a distinct weakness in the security arrangements around the Prime Minister and more disturbingly it shows a greater threat to humanity.

MAGISTER: Listen to me.  Throw away your guns; we are not your enemy.

DOCTOR: We must speak to the Prime Minister.

MELANIE: Will she see us?

DOCTOR: Pay attention Mel, this is 2006, not 1986.  This is twenty years in your future.

MAGISTER: Sadly your Prime Minister was ousted by a shameful betrayal by lesser creatures of base instinct and snivelling servility.

DOCTOR: In short there’s a new Prime Minister.  Harriet…something or other.  Jameson?  Johnson?

MAGISTER: But not new for very much longer.

DOCTOR: Yes, most unfortunate.  I never did find out how he dies.

MELANIE: We should maybe get going?

MAGISTER: Yes, we’ve dawdled here long enough.  History lessons are for children.

DOCTOR: You’re never too old to learn.

Report on the 10 Downing Street Incident by Major James Griffin UNIT 25/06/2006

It is clear that the Doctor, the Master and their associate, identified as Miss Melanie Bush of Pease Pottage, abducted the Prime Minister for a reason.  As our files on this version of the Doctor show, he is a highly erratic megalomaniac with rapid mood swings and an irascible temperament.  The Master was and remains a criminal master mind with a penchant for violence and destruction.  Little is known of Miss Bush except that she is a computer genius with an ability that surpasses everyone else on this planet.  Her virus attack on our base and the Torchwood Institute was remarkably complex and only the isolated mobile command base remained viable afterwards.  We plan to use its facilities to monitor the Doctor and intercept him before he succeeds in whatever scheme he’s cooked up with the Master.  His turning to the side of the Master is a dark day for us all at UNIT.

Transcript of Security Camera Footage from United Nations HQ New York 25/06/2006

The arrival of the suspects in New York posed something of a quandary as they appeared to have travelled there instantly.  However we suspect that they used a time travel device, aka TARDIS, to do so.

PM: I’m still not sure why you need my help Doctor.

DOCTOR: The Muloz have infiltrated every level of human society.  Only the Master can detect them and sadly he’s only willing to pass you the technology in return for a full pardon.

PM: I’ve read about this Master, and you Doctor.  I was fascinated to learn that alien beings are real.

DOCTOR: Don’t forget, to me you’re an alien being.  Don’t worry, we’re not all psychotic invaders and madmen.  There’s a hundred allies out there, waiting for you one day.  When you’re ready.  Draconians, Imperial Ice Warriors, not the rogue elements of course.  The House of Baal, the Trees, the Sensorites and even the Rills.  Although between me and you they’re not good with poetry.

MASTER: This is wasting time.

MELANIE: The Doctor knows what he’s doing.

MASTER: Does he indeed?

DOCTOR: You’ll get your pardon, if you deliver the goods.

MASTER: I’ve never broken my word as a Time Lord, which is why I rarely ever give it.  No one is worthy enough.  They all treat me as an outcast, because they’re afraid of me.  I possess the will to do the things that others baulk at.  I can make the hard decisions that others faint at.  I have the will of steel it takes to be a leader.  A good leader, a strong leader.  How do they treat me?  I was once feted as the next President and now look at me, an outcast reliant on an old enemy, one who believes in chaos and anarchy instead of order and unity.

MELANIE: At least the Doctor cares about people.  You only care about yourself.

MASTER: Perhaps Miss Bush, perhaps.  My single greatest weakness has always been to put the many ahead of the few, but I am not without compassion or mercy.  Whatever he tells you, I am not a monster.

DOCTOR: You’re worse than a monster.  Old friend.  That’s why I need your help now.

MASTER: To make the difficult decision that you cannot.  You want me to be your little pet killer.  You’re too afraid to get blood on your lily white hands Doctor.

DOCTOR: I’m not the one wearing gloves.

PM: Are they always like this Miss Bush?

MELANIE: Yes, and call me Mel.

Report on the United Nations HQ Incident by Major James Griffin UNIT 26/06/2006

Yesterday was a watershed moment for the United Nation Intelligence Service.  We discovered a massive infiltration of every level of our global society.  Thanks to the Doctor and Melanie Bush we have eliminated the Muloz threat.  However the criminal known as the Master remains at large and his capture remains our highest priority.  All charges against the Doctor are now dropped and he is free to go.  The Prime Minister apparently thanked him over a special dinner thrown in the Doctor and Miss Bush’s honour.  It is not currently known what they discussed only that the Doctor predicted that Great Britain would soon be entering a golden age of prosperity.  It is believed that the Doctor will give the UN a full debriefing of the incident and from the evidence we have collected above it will be a fascinating oration indeed.  The individual identified as Joanna Smith above has yet to be located either.  We suspect that she was just another a hypnotised victim of the Master.

A letter received by UNIT 27/06/2006

This short letter was found in the UNIT HQ mail bag.  It has been examined for fingerprints but none were found.  DNA tests of hair samples taken from Joanna Smith showed nothing of an earthly origin.

Your file was interesting reading, if a trifle inaccurate.  One Doctor was enough for my plans after all.  I let the other one go as she was of no further use to me.

Ta-ta

M