Peri looked across at the Doctor and rolled her eyes once again when the glaring, clashing colours of his jacket assaulted them. If style was a beautiful sonnet then the Doctor was wearing the anti-fashion remix, it was worse than awful it made her stomach dry heave each and every time she was forced to look at it. "Why are we here again?" she snapped coldly. Her own outfit was much more tasteful of course, a blouse of vibrant blues and red, a hip hugging black leather miniskirt which used to belong to an Australian girl called Tegan and the coolest pair of shoes that were both practical yet stylish. "It's all dust and rocks!" Peri put her hands on her hips and pouted.

"My dear Peri look around, witness the marvel of Mother Nature at work. The colours, the textures, the shapes, the raw majesty of a planet bursting with life." The Doctor saw that his American companion had turned her interest towards a small rock and he shook his head sadly. "If you're not even prepared to listen then you could at least pretend to be interested, or perhaps you would prefer that I return you back to your own place in the space time continuum from whence you came?"

Peri looked back at the Doctor. "No Doctor, I think that rock just moved."

"Impossible," the Doctor scoffed. "Mars doesn't have any silicon based life forms unlike Earth and most other planets in the solar system."

"Earth has living rocks?" Peri asked incredulously. "I'd like to see those."

"Certainly Peri, Stonehenge is a most remarkable place once you know its true history."

"Stonehenge? Now I know you're having me on. Stonehenge was built by cavemen Doctor, it's in all the history books."

"Of course it is now, it did take me a long time to have them rewritten to prevent any idle curiosity and inevitable release of the Lithiomons."

"You're for real?" Peri asked her curiosity peeked.

"Better not to ask too many questions Peri." The Doctor tapped the side of his nose and winked at his confused friend. "Come on, this way I think." The Doctor led the way across the dry Martian landscape.

"I thought Mars was a dead world," Peri complained. "Or did you rewrite the astronomy books too?"

"Nothing so glib Peri, this is the future and Earth is methodically terraforming Mars to meet its population overcrowding needs. It's a bold plan but ultimately a folly, like Don Quixote discovered there are some windmills that just cannot be tilted at."

There was a loud menacing roar and a Tyrannosaurus Rex lumbered into view from around a large outcrop of rocks. "Oh swell we've arrived in the Martian branch of Jurassic Park!" Peri looked around for somewhere to hide, preferable somewhere with a hot dog stand and a chilled can of cola.

"Stay absolutely still Peri," the Doctor hissed softly. "Its vision is based on movement."

"Well duh," Peri hissed back at the Doctor. "Howard may have been a no good creep and so not good enough for Mom but he did like to talk about his work, archaeology and all that digging related stuff. There's just one problem, T Rex hunts by smell and I don't think he's a big fan of my perfume."

"Run Peri!" the Doctor shouted as the dinosaur began to lumber forwards so he took hold of his companion's hand and dragged her along with him. "Over there, there's a small cave."

"We'll never both get inside of there!" Peri shouted.

"Now is not the time to worry about the size of your hips Peri," the Doctor replied.

"I was talking about you!" Peri returned the insult.

"Open fire!" Hammerstein commanded.

Joe Pineapples aimed his photon blaster at the Dinosaurs head and fired a salvo of shots at it. "Yes!" he shouted when the creature roared in pain.

"Kill! Destroy!" Mek-Quake, a 20 foot long Killdozer, cackled with glee. He opened fire with his own weapons and scored a hit on the creatures back leg.

"Uh oh, looks like the big ugly is coming our way!" Ro-Jaws, a small sanitation robot, trundled out of harms way with his large metal teeth chattering with fear.

"Fire!" Hammerstein ordered again and added the firepower of his blaster pistol to the assault.

Mongrol reeled as a large chunk of dirt was kicked in his direction, badly denting his side.

"This is not very fraggin' good," General Blackblood chided the others. "That thing's hardly slowing down. Joe, give it something to chew on."

Joe Pineapples took hold of a grenade and took careful aim. With precision he threw the tiny metal container of high explosives into the creatures mouth. Seconds later the creature slumped forwards and crashed onto the ground with a thunderous whoomp.

"Mek-Quake, take Mongrol back to base let them patch him up, Ro-Jaws you go with them." Hammerstein looked across at the two blobs of colour in the distance. "We'll go and see if they're still in one piece."

"Aw, I always miss the post slaughter parties."

"On second thoughts stay here but keep quiet."

The Killdozer lifted the ape like red and yellow robot up onto his back with three of his long arms. "Mek-Quake get Mongrol fixed all right."

Blackblood sniggered at the stupid robot's bad vocabulary. "I'm going to get me a necklace made of Rex teeth, anyone else want one? They're worth a fortune if you know the right people."

"Later," Hammerstein ordered. "First we make sure the civilians are safe."

Peri looked at the dead dinosaur. "Is it really dead?"

The Doctor prodded the corpse with the tip of his shoe. "Yes I think so, and here come our valiant rescuers now."

Peri did a double take when she saw that her rescuers were the scuzziest bunch of robots she had ever seen outside of a cheap low budget b-movie. "Thanks for saving us."

"No problem sweetie," Ro-Jaws replied. "Just part of the service."

Hammerstein saluted stiffly to the Doctor. "Glad to be of service sir."

"Thank you," the Doctor echoed Peri's earlier sentiments. "I was fearful for my young friends life."

"Yeah, that was why you were trying to use me as a human shield was it?"

"It was a ploy Peri, use you as bait to draw him into my trap."

"Some plan, you were screaming for your mother!"

"I was not, I was merely uttering the Zyton war cry of Mu-tar." The Doctor started to brush some imaginary dirt off of his clothing. "It means death to large enemy, they have a rather limited tongue in many ways but very adapt at organic technology."

Peri ignored the Doctor's mumbling and looked at her rescuers, her rather large and metal skinned rescuers. "Just ignore him, he tends to ramble when he's repressing."

"I do not repress!" the Doctor exclaimed loudly.

"No, of course not Doctor, whatever. So how come there's Dinosaurs on Mars?"

"Part of the Terraforming procedure involved certain genetic experiments Miss," Hammerstein explained.

Joe Pineapples looked at the Doctor's coat. "Say, that's a nice jacket."

"You really think so?" The Doctor narrowed his eyes and carefully studied the seven-foot tall assassin.

"Sure, the colours, the cut, it's just so alive."

The Doctor nodded and looked sternly at Peri. "Some people don't see beyond the mere physical and are content to discard what they don't understand with a simple yuck."

"Hey, I've got taste," Peri snapped back. "I'm not the one who isn't obviously colour blind."

"In the name of the Father, the Son and The Holy Robot, amen." Hammerstein used his blaster pistol to create a funeral pyre for the dead T-Rex.

"What the hell is this?" Peri demanded.

"Interesting," the Doctor commented casually.

"How is setting a dinosaur on fire interesting?" Peri demanded. "Or do you want dinosaur wings, extra crispy?"

"I have sent the creature on into the next life," Hammerstein explained.

"Oh great, a robot who's got religion."

"Now, now Peri lets not dismiss other people's beliefs out of hand."

"I'm sorry," Peri apologised. "It's just that I've never met a robot who believes in God."

"Do we not all have souls?" Hammerstein asked.

"I dunno," Peri admitted. "I'm happily agnostic, although my mother's new husband keeps making weird remarks about some of my clothes."

"I think you must have suffered transference," the Doctor said quietly.

"I don't want to worry anyone, but I can see another T-Rex headed our way." Ro-Jaws trundled around the group on his wheels. "Lets get out of here huh?"

"Let it come," Blackblood said casually. "It might tear one of you lot apart, I could do with a few laughs right about now."

Joe looked at Blackblood and they both drew their guns at the same time. "I should have killed you years ago Strawdog."

"You didn't have the diodes Pineapples remember? I won, and you lost. So ask yourself, do you feel lucky, Joe?"

"Stop it you two!" Hammerstein stepped in between to two bitter rivals and separated them. "We're a team, we work together."

Ro-Jaws looked up. "Hey, look at that! It's Deadlock!"

"Oh great, that's all we need." Blackblood looked at Joe and lowered his gun. "I wonder what freakface wants?"

Joe lowered his gun, slowly. "Probably handing out flyers for his little Khaos Kult."

The Doctor looked at Hammerstein. "Okay, what's going on? Start at the beginning and don't leave anything out."

Deadlock landed his hovercycle near to the others. He strode over to the group and looked at the two humans, correction, one human and an alien being. Unsheathing the Ace of Swords he made ready to kill the enemy of humanity.

"Hello, I am known as the Doctor." The Doctor took a step forward.

Deadlock's circuits froze and went ice cold. "The Doctor?" This being was known, he was a meddler, he interfered, and he was kin to Khaos. "I am sorry, I thought you were an enemy of humanity."

"Earth is my home from home," the Doctor said with a disarming smile. "It's looked after me and I try to do my part to keep it safe, although there's something's I am not allowed to get involved in. Time is a delicate fabric and to tear even the tiniest hole into its being would be to destroy the Universe itself."

Peri shook her head as the Doctor went into speech mode. "He's not always this verbose," Peri apologised. "Normally he's nicer, well not to me but people in general."

Blackblood returned his attention to the others. "Unless we want to be turned into a pile of scrap metal and body parts I suggest we address the immediate problem."

"There are five of them!" Joe exclaimed. "We don't have the resources to handle five of them."

"Oh great, we're going to be chewed up and spat out." Ro-Jaws hid behind Deadlocks legs.

"There is no need for fear," Deadlock stated flatly. "I will send the flies to mask our retreat to safer territory."

"Running away?" Peri asked. "That's the best plan anyone's suggested so far."

Joe loosed off a salvo of shots. "This should slow them down."

"You missed you fool," Blackblood snapped.

"Did I?" Joe asked and smiled as the ground in front of the carnivores exploded in a series of explosions.

"No time for showing off you guys." Ro-Jaws took hold of Peri's hand. "Me and Peri are getting out of here, I think she's in love with me."

The Doctor looked at Hammerstein. "Let's get out of here, live to fight another day sounds rather good about now."

Deadlock stood oblique to the advancing dinosaurs and raised his hands. "I command the flies to come forth and disguise our retreat!" He turned and followed the others as a massive cloud of tiny insects flitted into existence and swarmed off towards the advancing reptiles. His hovercycle followed after him like a loyal puppy following its master.

Peri watched slack-jawed as the robot cast some sort of magic spell. "Doctor, how is that possible? How did he do that?"

The Doctor closed his companion's mouth and smiled at her. "I'll explain later." They sat on the hovercycle as they made their way across the endless red plain of dust and sand. "I know it's around here," the Doctor said at last. "I always remember where the TARDIS lands."

Colonel Pullman looked at the strange blue box. "I want this thing open soldier."

"Yes sir," the Soldier replied.

"It's not made of metal, plastic, wood or concrete sir," Dr Haughmann reported. "Whatever it is it defies all our scanners, it may be something new sir."

"Until we know what it is we can't figure out how to cut it open sir," the Soldier said helpfully.

"I'm getting a report, from the archives sir. These files are over two thousand years old; it's some sort of general-purpose communications and storage facility. Used by civilian watchmen to assist in the apprehension of criminals."

"Interesting, we know what it's for but not what it's made of. You're an idiot Dr Haughmann, a highly educated idiot."

"Cross referencing with a military file." Dr Haughmann stared at the screen as the military report flickered up onto the display. "Oh dear..."

"United Nations Intelligence Taskforce?" Colonel Pullman scoffed. "What the hell? The Doctor? Dangerous? Time Travel? This is a joke, right?"

"No sir, look at the date, 2000 AD." Dr Haughmann pointed to the old-fashioned date style. "There's no way someone could fake this."

The Doctor looked down at the ground. "Stop! Look at that! They've moved the TARDIS."

Peri climbed down off the strange floating machine and stood next to the Doctor. "Who would want to steal that piece of junk?"

"Junk?" the Doctor snapped. "Junk?" He looked at Peri with renewed disappointment. "Junk??? The TARDIS may be many things but it is not junk. She's getting on a little bit I admit but I've lovingly restored the old girls parts and particulars for many years now so don't go insulting her like that."

"I...I'm sorry. I just meant it's a big blue box, where's the curiosity in that? It looks like it's going to fall to pieces so why has somebody taken such a keen interest in it?"

The Doctor looked at Peri and smiled. "Of course, I should have though of that. Why didn't I think of that? Perhaps my mind is too highly tuned and only your narrow little mind is capable of seeing the imponderable truth of human stupidity."

"Thanks," Peri said. "I think." She turned to Blackblood. "Was he insulting me?"

"Does it matter? You're just a human being, get over it."

Deadlock looked at Blackblood. "Show some respect to your betters Blackblood. An ant has more integrity than you."

"You want a piece of me?" Blackblood asked Deadlock. "You think you can take me on?"

"He'd have to join the queue." Joe Pineapples put his blaster to the back of Blackblood's head. "Give me a reason, a move, a gesture and you're gone."

"Enough!" Hammerstein ordered. "Calm down, we have to think about this."

The Doctor looked at the tracks more closely, they headed in the direction they were travelling in already. "This way you lot, lets press on shall we? I would like to find the TARDIS sooner rather than later, I do hope no one is trying anything foolish."

"Try the laser cutter," Colonel Pullman ordered.

The soldier aimed the powerful cutting equipment at the lock but nothing happened. "It's no use sir, this thing's tougher than a T-Rex egg shell."

"Did I give you permission to do an audio commentary soldier?" the Colonel asked. "Get on with your work. Try the sonic pulse emitter."

The emitter was switched on but the lock refused to respond to any of the frequencies.

"Perhaps we need to look at this from another perspective," Dr Haughmann suggested. "There is a theory put forward by a Dr Thascales that matter can be controlled and manipulated by mathematics."

Colonel Pullman looked at the scientist and shot him right between the eyes. "I've never heard such unmitigated claptrap in my life."

The Doctor decided to cheer Peri up as they travelled. "The TARDIS is quite impenetrable of course, the walls are created by block transfer computation. In other words highly complicated formulae that reshape matter and energy into whatever I want it to appear as."

"I always wanted to know that," Peri yawned.

"Indeed, however it needs the chameleon circuit to effect any changes to the basic pattern. That's why the old thing always looks like a dreary blue police telephone box. Those twins we met recently, they will one day discover the principle of block transfer computation. They're very bright for their age, I suppose I shouldn't have given them so many pointers but it's hard not to talk shop with people of their intelligence."

"Doctor, you threw them out of the TARDIS after they threw a water balloon at you." Peri reminded the Doctor that those two boys were just, well boys. "They called you stinky shoes too remember?"

"Don't remind me." The Doctor frowned. "Anyway, onwards we must go. We few, we very few, we merry band of travellers."

"Oh please, could you steal a more obvious quote?" Peri snapped. "I did study Shakespeare at school you know."

"Yes, well the poor chap liked his ale and well one thing led to another and well I did have to author a couple of paragraphs myself." The Doctor looked down at his yellow and black stripe cloth covered knees.

"Over there!" Joe Pineapples spotted something with his binoculars. "Tell me that that isn't suspicious? The tracks lead there too."

"Too obvious," Hammerstein replied. "It's a fake, a decoy to draw people's attention away from the real McCoy."

"Agreed." Deadlock waved his fingers over the panorama. "Over there, a feeling, energies, burning flesh, snapping bone, the dull lament of pain, the crisp sharp torments of the flesh."

"Is he always like this?" Peri asked Blackblood.

"This is a good day, you should see him in a foul mood." Blackblood looked at the agent of Khaos and shivered. "He makes most of what I did look tame and playful."

Joe Pineapples scoffed. "You're a monster Blackblood, a psychotic dog that should have been put down years ago."

"Yes, well I've never killed as many human beings as he has. You tell me that that's a mark of sanity? I've killed humans, I was made to kill them after all, but I kind of like them now as much as robot can like one. Deadlock though, who knows what's in his mind? He's capable of killing these two on a whim."

"I'll protect you sweetheart," Ro-Jaws promised the female called Peri. "You're safe with me around to protect you."

"I'll feel a lot safer when we find the TARDIS and I can have a nice relaxing soak in the pool." Peri could imagine the cool and refreshing water, its chlorine smell and gently lapping waves. All she wanted to do was get out of these dusty old things, put a bikini on and forget all about her troubles for an hour or five. Maybe with a cold glass of cola to refresh her insides with too, and no Doctor splashing around with his collection of bright yellow plastic ducks to spoil her rest.

Alerts sounded, red lights flashed and klaxons sounded. Soldiers ran about to positions of defence and attack and worried looking scientists milled around the place turning a smooth and simple drill into a logistical nightmare.

"Get to your places," Colonel Pullman shouted. "The perimeter has been breached, I want to see efficiency not stupidity."

"Sir, we're detecting six maybe seven intruders. I think they could be ABC sir."

"Don't be stupid soldier, Atomic, Biological and Chemical Division never sends patrols out this deep into the Martian desert. Now get to your post before I have you shot for incompetence." Pullman shook his head as the airhead blonde girl ran to her post. "Why me?" His words were all but snatched away as a blast of air and debris exploded nearby. "What the hell is going on?"

"Surrender this installation Colonel," Hammerstein ordered the officer.

"Surrender?" Pullman scoffed. "To you? A sergeant? Are you stupid son?"

"I'm a general," Blackblood commented casually to the Doctor. "Hammerstein's the man though, he's got that leadership spirit. When it comes to raw leadership only a raw lettuce has more ability than he does."

"No sir, I'm the one ordering you to stand your men down. This is an illegal base; you are outside of military protocols. I will have to report this to my superiors."

"You do that son," Pullman replied. "In the meantime I've got better things to do than bandy words with a robot."

Blackblood looked across at Joe and smiled. "Should we tell him about the dinosaurs that have been tracking us?"

Joe nodded. "It does seem only fair."

Peri looked at the Doctor. "Those things have been following us?"

The Doctor nodded slowly and grimly. "We're probably the only food they've encountered in weeks, maybe months. They'd follow us across the surface of Mars and back again."

"We have to find the TARDIS and get out of here." Peri looked around and in one darkened corner she spotted their salvation. "Doctor, there it is! Let's get inside and leave?"

"We can't leave these soldiers here to fight those things alone Peri. We have to help them."

"Help?" Peri asked numbly. "Can't we just get everyone inside and escape?"

The Doctor shook his head sadly. "There isn't time Peri, we have to act now and we have to act quickly."

Deadlock looked at the Doctor. "You must leave, take your friend and leave. You cannot stay here, these soldiers will be executed for treason and we're robots, we can be rebuilt. Leave us Doctor, run."

"Never!" the Doctor said with a voice like silent thunder. "I won't turn my back on anyone who needs my help. Peri you get inside the TARDIS, you'll be safe in there." He handed the key to his best friend. "I have to help these people."

"I know Doctor," Peri said sadly. "That's why I'm staying here too, to help. We are a team aren't we?"

"Yes of course," the Doctor said after a second. "Still why don't you go and unlock the TARDIS, we may need to make a hasty retreat. You there." The Doctor pointed to a male soldier. "Help my young friend here."

Peri looked at the well-built soldier. "Hi there, I'm Peri." She put her arm through his and leaned close to his muscular chest. "What's your name?"

The Doctor looked at Colonel Pullman. "You'll need bigger guns Colonel, those things have skin as tough as steel."

"Steel huh? What kind of an expert are you?"

"I am every kind of expert," the Doctor replied, more than slightly put out. "I've seen one of these things in action, they're very dangerous. You don't have any neurotoxins do you?"

"What for?" Pullman asked.

"Never mind," the Doctor replied. "Just something I saw in a film theatre once."

"Take point Joe." Hammerstein moved his troops into position. "Blackblood and Deadlock you're the second line of defence, Ro-Jaws you stay with Peri and make sure she gets out of here alive if things go badly."

"What will you be doing?" Ro-Jaws asked Hammerstein.

"Making sure none of them attack the civilians." Hammerstein's words were cut off by the sound of frantic gunfire and explosions. "They're here."

The next thirty seconds were a blur to Peri as the base lights went out only for duller red lights to come on in their place. They reminded her of blood and she shuddered and held on tighter to her soldier friend's arm. She screamed loudly when one of the dinosaurs crashed through the wall and scooped a soldier up in its jaws.

"I'll save you Peri," Ro-Jaws promised.

"Open fire!" Hammerstein ordered. "Shoot it."

The room was illuminated by the laser blasts, the flashes of bullets on steel walls and the luminous glow of Deadlock's Ace of Swords as it slashed deeply into tough reptilian skin.

"Kind of looks like the thing that built me," Blackblood commented casually to Colonel Pullman as the human commander broke and fled for his life. "Where are you going colonel? Get back here, that's an order."

"Screw you psycho," Pullman shouted and continued running.

"Should I shoot you in the back?" Blackblood asked himself. "No, it's too honourable, only first rate scum deserve a proper cowards death."

The T-Rex went down suddenly, its head exploding suddenly.

"Kill! Destroy!" Mek-Quake's voice echoed all the way into the building. "Mek-Quake kill dinosaurs!"

"Looks like the cavalry has arrived!" Ro-Jaws said excitedly to Peri. "There's Morrigun and Mongrol!"

Peri saw the large apish red and yellow robot that had been injured a few hours earlier and a slender feminine robot that somehow managed to slink across the room like a mechanical catwalk model. She was not jealous of the way the big idiot next to her was drooling all over the robotic woman, not jealous in a seething with envy way.

Mongrol looked into the eyes of a dying soldier. "Tell Lara I love her, tell Lara I need her." The soldier's eyes went blank as the thing that made him alive left his body.

Ro-Jaws put an arm on the large robots back. "I hope she gets yer message pal, I know you loved her so much."

Peri ran over to the Doctor and hugged him for still being alive. "Let's get out of here Doctor, I've seen too much death to take in anymore."

"You go ahead Peri, I want to have a talk to Hammerstein."

Peri rushed into the familiar environ of the console room and quickly pulled her shoes off. She let out a sigh of relief as she sat down on a comfy chair and waited for the Doctor to return. After a few minutes of feet resting relaxation the Doctor entered the console room and set the dematerialisation codes. "What did you say to him Doctor?" Peri asked.

"I said that they should spare the lives of those soldiers, they were only following orders."

"Did they listen?" Peri asked concerned for the health of the soldiers.

"Yes, I think so. I convinced Hammerstein that it's a soldier's duty to follow orders and he agreed. The others will give him different opinions especially that Deadlock, he used to be an executioner of traitors and spies."

"That does not surprise me," Peri replied. "I knew that there was something up with him, and what was up with that cloak and sword routine?"

"Another time maybe?" the Doctor said. "I believe you wished to avail yourself of the swimming pool?"

Peri nodded eagerly and left the console room, unbuttoning her blouse and she went. She was really looking forward to a relaxing dip in the pool and she stopped by the kitchen on the way to her room to pick up a chilled can of cola from the refrigerator.