BLONDE JOKES

 

Sorry to all my friends who are blonde lol but hey you know how it is some of these jokes are actually really really funny lol even if they aren't true!!!!!

1. What do you call 4 blondes stood ear to ear?         A wind tunnel

2. What do you call a blonde with a brain cell?            A miracle

3. There are three women marooned on a desert island, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They found a lamp, and after rubbing it a genie came out. “I will grant you each 1wish,” he said to the women. So first the brunette said” I wish I was back with my family and friends cos I really miss them” The genie grants her wish, and she vanishes. Next the redhead says: “I miss my husband. I wish I could be back with him.” “Your wish is granted” replies the genie, and so the redhead disappears too. The blonde sits alone thinking about her wish. Finally she decides: “I’m really lonely now. I wish my two friends were back with me”

4. A blonde goes to the doctor and says: ‘doctor, my body hurts all over. Look, wherever I touch my body it hurts’ she demonstrates this by poking herself a few times in different places, wincing and saying ow every time. ‘ I don’t know what’s wrong with me.’

‘A-ha’ says the doctor. ‘I see what the problem is. You’ve broken your finger’

5. How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree?                 Wave to her

6.  How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?                Knock on the hatch

7.  Why was the blonde upset when she locked her keys in the car?          It was raining and she’d left the top down

8. What did the blondes mother to her on her first date?               “If you’re not in bed by 12, then come home.”

9. What do u call a blonde with half a brain cell?                      Gifted!

10. What do u call a blond with a full brain cell?                  Pregnant!

11.  An intelligent blonde, a dumb blonde, and Father Christmas are in a lift; there is a $100 bill on the floor. Who picks it up?

The dumb blonde. The other two don’t exist!