THE BIG BANG

The Levellers/Fish Brothers tour ended two months later than expected (due to Jon's collapse) culminating in the Brighton Center gig. Here we managed to nearly kill James the photographer and a bouncer with our surprise pyrotechnic finale to Brief History of the World and then blocked the exit with the Fishtank for the rest of the weekend. Surely we're not banned from yet another venue? Don't bet on it!

We managed to video the bash from two different sources - our mate Mark down the front and Grufta from the sidelines - so we'll try to get a tape together for next time we hassle you. Provisionally called "Fish Brothers at Large" it will replace the old video "Shaggafatty" which has sold out and is out of date - hair, weight and bass player being noticable differences.

TALKING OF BETS AND BASS PLAYERS ...

... we still haven't been paid our £250 bet money for surviving the Levs tour yet but we're going to use this as an excuse to get more gigs out of our mates. One casualty of the tour was none other than Blonde Wanton (sob) petrified bass player and clean living superwaif who decided to leave the band to concentrate on his sleeping. But fear not Blonde fans, he will stay with us to tickle the ivories for recordings and some gigs, so in football terms he's moved up into a general manager kind of effect.

In fact the super five-piece ensemble was unleashed at Brighton Centre with Blondie on his cheesy organ and the new boy, Ste, on bass. Ste can be heard on the end of "Squeezy Ball" (not "wobbly balls" as quoted in The Leader) on the "Follow Thru" album making some references to illegal substances which confuses the rest of us clean living types?!

In fish Brothers tradition Ste has to have a silly name to follow in the muddy footprints of Blonde and Les Pubshitter. Ste is currently wither Ste Stevey Stevens or Rumpy Stiltonkiltskin, but Martin can't pronounce the latter plus Ste lost his kilt at the end of the tour. For those wondering what Les looked like track down a copy of Shaggafatty or check out Chesty's cartoon in the CD booklet. He's the one urinating on some tea cups, the mucky bugger.

HERE COMES THE BEGGING BIT

As I never tire of ranting on about we're totally unsigned to any record company, agency or any such thing (until we sell out) so any donations such as stamps, envelopes, writing paper and such like are all gratefully received. Also if you know of any venue near you that may be suitable for the Fish to play at, please let us know any addresses or phone numbers and we'll contact them and see what we can do. Finally let me draw attention to the fine Fishy goodies you can purchase from our HQ. (and this website by clicking HERE - ED) We hope to have some Fish Brothers are Crap T-shirts re-done and also the video for next time. Also a web page. (tee hee, ED) There is one about but apparently it's out of date. (not this one, guv'nor - ED) I just keep getting Swindon's biggest car dealers! Thanks for appreciating the Fish Brothers, we appreciate it.

love,

Martin Fish

McGHEE'S TRUMPET

Hi, McGhee here. I'd just like to say a few words:
B.U.Y.O.U.R.A.L.B.U.M.P.L.E.A.S.E.!
(ok, a few more then ...)
T-shirt sir? Record madam?
Everything must go, yes that's right, everything! Red panrs, nurse's dress, even Blonde Wanton.
Anyway, we hope you enjoyed the gigs as much as we enjoyed ruining your evening. But for now I'll say goodbye and I may see you at one of the many celebrity weddings that are taking place in and around Brighton this year. If not, see you in the Albert. Mine's a Stella.

See ya ... McGhee

CHESTY PLAYS GUITAR

Hello fan - a word of humble thanks to you for joining our mailing list (er, shouldn't that be visiting our website - ED), and a word of encouragement lest you forget to attend our next show in your neighbourhood - without your support, jeers and abuse we are nothing. Wee look forward to seeing you again. Don't forget ... WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!

Much love ... Chesty

A FINAL (?) WORD FROM THE BLONDE

Dear, dear friends,

I write this from what is surely to be my death bed, as consumption has all but withered my once powerful, taut body. I am so weak that the mere act of raising pen to paper sends me into a dizzy swoon.
Thanks for all the cards, flowers and numerous gifts which I know in my heart many of you have sent me. Sadly, I have not received them as they have been kept from me and devoured by the other Fish Brothers - overcome with insane jealousy - even now they are whispering their foul plans for my demise.
It's all so clear to me now. All along, THEY, fuelled by greed and envy, have been poisoning me with their evil thoughts and it is this, that has sent me spiralling into decay.
I beg of you, the Great British Public - you who have always supported me, grant me my dying wish ... avange my death!!

Goodbye. I will be with you, always.

Blonde Wanton