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I was thinking today about The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe and how those four British kids went to Narnia
and lived out years and years, their whole lifetimes, and grew up as Kings and Queens until they got sucked back into their
own world through the wardrobe.
Why didn't they try to go home, I wonder? Why didn't they even talk about it, even once? The biggest reason, of course,
was probably that they lived in England. Who wants to go back to England, even when Nazis aren't bombing your house every
day? But didn't they miss their parents? It just seems like getting back home was an afterthought, an accident, and if it
hadn't happened they'd have been just as happy growing old and dying there.
I wonder if any of them got married or even had kids while they were there? It seems like they would have been old enough
to, although here's a really gross thought: Weren't they the only humans there? I mean, here you have these two dudes who
are both getting to be "that age", and the only chicks around are their sisters, or animals that talk? It's kind of like that
movie Saw, where they'd have to choose between cutting off their arms or dying.
Or, no, wait. There were fairies and elves and wood nymphs there too. I wonder if that's the exact reason that they're
called "nymphs". I'm glad I thought of that because for a minute I was starting to feel sick.
Anyway, in any other story I've ever read where someone gets lost or stranded or trapped, it seems like the whole
point is trying to get back home.
Alice In Wonderland
The Far Out Space Nuts
Gilligan's Island
Gulliver's Travels
H.R. Puff'N'Stuff
Land
of The Giants
Land of The Lost
Lidsville
Lost
Lost In Space
Quantum Leap
Robinson Crusoe
Sliders
Star
Trek: Voyager
Swiss Family Robinson
Time Tunnel
The Wizard of Oz
Maybe part of being in Narnia is that you don't want to go home. I can see, especially, having already grown up and
gone through puberty and having to learn all the crap you need to know how to run a whole freakin' country of weird-ass animal
people, and then have to go back and do it all over again in a country that's being fire-bombed by Nazis. That would suck.
Maybe it's just that there are no adults allowed in Narnia, or that when they reach a certain age they die, like in that
episode of Star Trek where all the kids on that one planet live for hundreds and hundreds of years and all the adults
go crazy and then get weird splotches on them and then die and they call Kirk and Spock "grups". That was kind of a creepy
episode.
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