Chapter Five
Two hours later, I was waiting in the lobby of the hospital for Brian. I knew he was going to show up because he wanted to know what was going on. I had been given my medication and was feeling a little better. I was in pain shortly after Brian and I had started playing, but I had pushed it out of my mind. I had learned how to block the pain so well, that half the time I didn't even feel it even though it was causing me to limp or stand funny.
By the time I got to the hospital, I was in so much pain I could hardly walk. My head was reeling because of the pain and I couldn't think straight. The doctors immediately led me back into a room and fed me full of morphine to kill the pain. I felt extremely high; like I always did coming off of morphine. I kept doing that to myself. Just the act of walking was painful. Every step I took every day sent shock waves through my body. The doctors were amazed that I could even walk at this point, let alone play basketball.
I sat there in the lobby with my head in my hands. I was wearing sunglasses because the lighting was giving me a headache. Most of the time, the morphine gave me a migraine headache. I was trading the constant pain for a temporary one, so I didn't care. I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. "Briann?" my doctor said to me.
"Yes, Doc?" I didn't even bother to lift my head.
"There's a young man here to see you." This got my attention. I lifted my head and was met with Brian's blue eyes. He was kneeling right in front of me. "I'll leave you two alone," the doctor said.
"So you wanna tell me what's going on?" Brian asked, sitting in a chair beside me. "Are you feeling better?"
"Much," I said.
"So what's going on? Why are you here?"
"You wanna know how I managed to get into recovery to see you? It was because two weeks earlier it had been me lying there in that room thinking I was dying."
"What?" Brian's jaw dropped open. "What happened?"
"I was in a car accident, hit by a drunk driver. I had serious back trauma. The doctors weren't sure I was ever going to walk again. I was paralyzed from the waist down. I was still in the hospital when you were admitted for your surgery. I begged and pleaded with Kara, the recovery nurse, to let me in there to see you. Up until that point, I was on a suicide watch. I had tried three times to commit suicide. I didn't want to live anymore. Then when I saw you there in recovery, sleeping like an angel, something hit me. I remembered all the good times we had shared and I knew I wanted to share more with you."
"But that was only a year ago. How are you..."
"Able to walk?" I finished for him. "The doctors are still amazed at that. The doctor's told me that I would never walk again. And until you went through your surgery, I had no ambition to ever walk again. Then, while holding your hand in recovery, I made you a promise. That one day, I would walk again, for you, so that we could play another game."
"I remember that," Brian whispered.
"You should. You opened your eyes and said, 'I'm gonna hold you to that.' I dunno if you knew at that point what had happened."
"I think in my heart I did, but I didn't want to believe it. But what about the pain?"
"It's constant. I'm always pushing myself too hard. It's been about two weeks since I've had to come back here for a morphine dose."
"They have you on morphine?"
"Only as needed. I've learned to block out the pain. If I hadn't have gotten into that argument with you, I probably wouldn't have even realized I was in pain until I passed out."
"We noticed you limping," Brian stated.
"Yea, well, I shattered my ankle in the accident and every now and again it gives me problems. Just like my back."
"But how in the world did you beat me? It's only been a year." Leave it to Brian to be more concerned about his game than his friend. Oh, don't get me wrong, he does care about his friends, but he has always wanted to know how I managed to beat him at basketball.
"That's gotta be my physical therapist's fault. Allen was the one who got me walking again. And then when he learned that I loved basketball, he started pushing me harder so that I could play against him. He's nowhere near as good as you are, but he kept pushing. It's because of him that I'm able to play today." I thought for a minute. "No, that's wrong. It's not because of him. It's because of the Lord."
"How do you mean?"
"All those nights I spent alone in my room, I prayed. Allen just helped me. The Lord was the one who led me through it all. He comforted me and told me not to worry. He was the whole reason I turned on the radio that day."
"What day? What are you talking about?" Brian placed his hand on my knee.
"There was a day about six weeks ago I was lying in bed in so much pain I couldn't move. I had already called Allen and he told me I couldn't have any more morphine because they'd already given me a huge dose earlier that day. They were worried about overdosing me. Anyway, the pain was so unbearable that I guess I started hallucinating. There you were standing at the foot of my bed. Your lips were moving but no sound was coming out. I finally pieced it together that you wanted me to turn on the radio. When I did, the song that was playing on the station that I was dialed into was "As Long As You Love Me." It made me forget about the pain and I know this sounds bad, but it put me to sleep."
"What?"
"Not like that. It relaxed me so much that I fell asleep. I love the song and when I woke up, most of the pain was gone. I'm convinced that the Lord let me see you to help me."
"Well, I'm glad. Are you able to leave?"
"I can leave whenever I want. Just don't expect me to drive. I'm so high right now, I think I can fly."
"Don't worry, I'll keep your feet on the ground. Come on. The guys are waiting for us."
"Guys?" I said, leaning on Brian as we stood up together. "Oh yea. The Backstreet Boys. Well I guess I shouldn't keep 'em waiting then, huh?" I giggled. Brian wrapped his arm around my waist and led me out of the hospital. He had no idea how much in heaven I was at that moment.