Chapter Eight
A week later, the morphine doses seemed to be helping. I could go out and play games with the guys and then continue doing other things like shopping or cleaning. The biggest thing I had problems with was knowing when to give myself morphine. I had to feel the pain again. It was tough. I did things subconsciously, like limp, when I was in pain and I had to rely on other people to tell me what I was doing.
Slowly I was beginning to feel the pain again. It wasn't pleasant, but I knew it was necessary. Brian and I were always out on the basketball court, just like we had been when we were little. We would play until it got dark and then usually Kevin, but sometimes Nick would have to come and get us and tell us to go home. If we weren't out on the basketball court we were out doing other sports: soccer, baseball, golf, rollerblading. Sometimes the guys came with us, but other times it was just Brian and I.
One evening, when it was just Brian and I, we stopped at the mall on our way home from the batting cage. We were just walking around, talking about nothing in particular. It was late so no one was around. Suddenly, I heard a high pitched squeal. I looked and there were about ten girls running towards Brian and I. Brian quickly pulled me into the entrance of a store and kissed me. After the girls ran past, Brian let go of me.
"Sorry about that Bre. Sometimes it's the only way to get them to run past."
"So what? You just happen to kiss who's ever next to you?" I said with a smirk.
"No. Only when it's a girl I like."
I looked at him a moment and then said, "Okay. Where were we going?" I changed the subject as quickly as I could, but apparently it wasn't fast enough.
"Bre, you know I'm single, right?"
"Yea, I know." I really didn't know that he was single. I thought he was still dating Stephanie, but then again, I hadn't seen her around, so maybe I had figured he was single.
"I've always liked you Briann," Brian said.
Before he could say more, I noticed the arcade. "Hey, Bri, arcade's still open. You up for a game of table hockey?"
"You bet. Race ya?"
"I can't," I said. "Mamma says I can't run."
"Yes, you can," he said grabbing my hand.
"Hey, I'm only giving you the same excuse you gave me twenty years ago."
Brian laughed and then leaned over and picked me up. "Okay, fine, I'll carry you."
"No, I'm afraid of heights!" I squealed. I was laughing the entire time.
"That's my excuse. You can't use it." Brian carried me into the arcade and set me down in front of the air hockey table. "So you got change?"
"Yep." I put two quarters in the machine and it started humming. We played four games of air hockey and were working on our fifth to see who would be the "grand champion" when the arcade employee came over to us and told us it was closing time. "Hang on a sec. Let us finish. We're almost done," I pleaded. Then the machine died. We were tied at two games apiece and in the last game it was five to five.
"Aw man!" Brian exclaimed. "Well, we could always go bowling."
"Brian we need to go," I said shaking my hands. I was starting to hurt.
"Okay, we'll go home."
We walked out to my car (I still wouldn't let him drive) and I reached in the glove box pulling out one of my needles. I then raised my shirt and injected the morphine into my stomach. When Brian wasn't looking I gave myself a second dose. It was the only way to make the pain completely subside. We sat there in my car for a while and waited for the morphine to take effect. As soon as it did, I leaned over and put my head on Brian's shoulder. "We should get home, Bri," I giggled.
"Yeah, and I'm driving."
"Okay fine," I said, climbing into the passenger seat. "Just get me home in one piece okay?"
Brian seemed to have been driving really slowly. By the time we reached home, I could hardly walk I was so high. When Brian went to help me into the house, he tickled me accidentally. I started laughing and squirmed out of his reach and started running inside. He chased after me and eventually tackled me in the living room. I was laughing so hard I couldn't stop. Brian was sitting on my stomach trying to keep me from squirming.
Just then Nick walked in. Right behind him were the rest of the guys. "Hey, what's going on?" Nick asked.
"Just tickling some energy out of Bre," Brian told him. He continued to tickle me and I continued to laugh.
"Okay, okay," I said, trying to push Brian off of me. Brian got up and offered a hand to help me up. As I was standing up, I lost my balance and fell forward into Brian's arms. "I think you tickled me too much," I said. I hobbled to the bathroom just to get away from the guys. I splashed my face with water and then glanced at myself in the mirror. Brian's words earlier rang in my head. He only kissed girls he liked. Did that mean he liked me like that? Or am I just his friend?