The Real BSB (sung to the tune of "The Real Slim Shady") Thank You: AJ's Boner (Talking) May I have your attention please? May I have your attention please? Will the real Backstreet Boys please stand up? I repeat will the real Backstreet Boys please stand up? (BSB AND *Nsync stand up) We're gonna have a problem here... Y'all act like you never seen 5 white guys before Jaws all on the floor Like NKOTB just burst in the door And started singing "Right Stuff" worse than before 1994 Triping up all over furniture It's the return of them... "Awww..wait, no way, you're kidding, They didn't just sound how I think they did, Did they? They're really good" And Lou Pearlman said... Nothing you idiots, Pearlman's dead He's locked in my basement Feminist women love AJ McLean Guido, Guido and Johnny No-Name, "I'm sick of him, look at him Walkin' around, grabbin his you know what Limpin' like you know who Yeah, but he's so cute though" Yeah, they probably got a couple of screws up in their heads loose But no worse than what's goin on in AJ's bedroom Sometimes, I wanna get on TV, make fun of *NSYNC and just let loose But cant, but it's cool for *NSYNC fans to say BSB suck Well then they can go hump a dead moose Brian's bum is on my lips, and Howie's bum is on my lips And if they're lucky I might just give them a little kiss And that's the kind of stuff they tell little kids And expect them to know what Kevin's favorite color is Of course we're gonna know what Nick's mom's name is By the time we go to one concert We know everything, don't we? We ain't nothing but teenagers who like BSB Well, some of us like *NSYNC Who cuss out BSB fans because Backstreet is better and they know it But if you can insult BSB and Nick's big ass Then yo, there's no reason why we cant make fun of *NSYNC and Justin's ugly ass fro But if BSB feels the way that I feel I got the antidote Brian kick Justin's ass in b-ball, sing the chorus and it goes. CHORUS Cuz they're BSB, the real BSB All you other boy groups are just imitating So won't the real Backstreet Boys please stand up, please stand up, please stand up Cuz they're BSB, the real BSB All you other boy groups are just imitating So won't the real Backstreet Boys please stand up, please stand up, please stand up Backstreet Boys don't gotta sell dolls to sell records But *NSYNC do so f*** them and f*** Lou Pearlman too Do u think they give a damn about losing a Grammy? It's an honor just to be nominated, see? "But Backstreet what if u win wouldn't it be weird?" "Not really, we love coming here But just don't sit us next to Britney Spears But Christina Aguilera don't have to switch us chairs" Who cares about Carson Daly and Fred Durst? Which member of *NSYNC should give Carson head first? Kevin got married to someone real pretty "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kristin he he" We should download BSB audio on MP3 And show the whole world how the fans gave BSB a diamond CD! I'm sick of those fags Hanson, that really gay group All they do is annoy me So I have been sent here to destroy you! And there's a million people just like BSB Who sing like BSB, just don't give a f*** about the critics like BSB Who dress like BSB, walk, talk, and act like BSB And just might be the next best thing, but not quite BSB... CHORUS They're like a head-trip to listen to Cause they're only giving us things We only joke about with our friends inside the chat rooms The only thing is BSB don't have the balls to admit it In front of y'all and they ain't false or sugar coated at all They just get on the mic and spit it And whether you like to admit it They sing it better than 100% of you guy groups out there Then you wonder how can Kids eat up these albums like valiums It's funny; cause at the rate AJ's going, when he's thirty He'll be the only person in a nursing home flirting Pinching nurses asses when he's singing with the guys And he's jerkin' but the whole bag of viagra isn't working In every single person there's a Johnny No-Name lurking He could be workin' at burger king, spittin' on your onion rings Or in the parking lot, circling, screamin' "I don't give a f*** about *NSYNC!" With his windows down and his system up So will the real Backstreet Boys please stand up? And put one of those fingers on each hand up And be proud to be a millionaire and not outta control And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go? CHORUS x's 2 (Talking) Ha ha I guess that there's a little BSB in all of us, f*** it, let's kick *NSYNC's ass and all stand up.