Suddenly Téa couldn't help herself, she lost control. Her throat constricted, cutting off her breath as tears came flooding to her eyes. She tried, but couldn't suppress the sob that escaped her lips. “No...! No, don't!” He exclaimed, distress pitching his voice higher as his eyes opened in surprise. “I didn't mean to make you cry... Please, Téa...it's okay. Everything's okay while I'm here.” He brushed her face softly with his fingers, trying to wipe away the tears that were flowing freely now...

“It's not you,” she whispered shakily, regaining her composure after a few moments. “It's just that we've been through a lot tonight, you know...and it's, it's getting to me.” Feeling vulnerable having admitted that, she quickly searched his eyes, scanning for hidden signs of trickery or malice. But all she saw there was an unfathomable warmth, a totally disarming expression of pure love and concern that she had never witnessed in Todd's eyes before. He had never looked so open, so completely enraptured with her. Wanting to trust him, she decided to take a chance...to finally ask the question that she had been saving from the start...

“Where did the other one...the, the guardian...go?” she whispered hesitantly...

* * * *

“Poor Todd...” Peter smiled, reacting to the violent outburst indulgently. “...So egregiously wronged...so eloquently outraged,” he mocked. “Still playing the mistreated martyr, I see. Still deluding yourself into thinking that you're some kind of...victim.” He reached out languidly to smooth a long strand of Todd's tousled hair. Todd jerked his head away violently as if he'd been struck, but held his ground, trembling. “It's okay, son...I understand,” Peter soothed, sarcastically. “You're still blaming me for everything. You can't acknowledge the truth about what's happened in your life...what goes on inside of you. You can't face who you really are...”

Todd brushed his hair back with trembling hands, but kept his face averted, unwilling to look at his father. Peter's eyes swept the younger man's shoulders and neck longingly as he leaned near. “Give it up, Todd... Stop pretending that you don't understand,” he urged softly. “I knew you were different, special...right from the start. You tore me up inside...and you knew it. I could see it in your eyes. But your worthless mother intervened. She kept you close, almost ruined you...made you sentimental and stupid,” he sneered. “When she deserted us, I simply uncovered your hidden talents...gave you the special handling you needed to develop a spine, that's all. You were never mistreated...you were saved.” A cold gleam sparked in Peter's eyes as the muscles knotted tightly in Todd's jaw. “You were pathetic, soft...I taught you how to be a man...the kind of man I always knew you were inside...a man like me...”

The apparition adopted a gentle, coaxing tone. “You like to pretend that I'm the monster...like to picture yourself as superior...but think again, Todd. We're the same...we always have been. We're driven by the same instincts, the same motivations...we have the same appetites,” he continued quietly. “We have our own special way of looking at life...of feeling things. We've suffered the same betrayal and we lust for the same revenge. That's what makes us so different from other people.” He reached out, touching Todd's chest softly. “We're predators, boy--wolves among the sheep. We always will be. We thrive on intensity, violence...” His hand slid up to rest on Todd's shoulder, squeezing lightly. “We enjoy a shared taste for the extreme...”

Todd jerked away from Peter's hand, almost falling as he tried to back up. “Stop it...!” he snapped, struggling to remain upright as he fought the shock that was spreading through his consciousness. His mind spun crazily as he tried to reconcile his own failed attempt to hit Peter with the sickening realization that his father had no difficulty touching him at all. He could clearly feel Peter's hands on his body, cold and strong. The ramifications of this information sliced through his brain like a lightning bolt, blocking out all other thoughts. Cold, numbing fear swept over his mind, enfolding him in an icy, smothering strangle hold. Bewildered and frightened, he was forced to acknowledge his own impotence...the fact that there was no way at all for him to defend himself, no way for him to fight off the apparition physically. His stomach seized up in cramping waves of nausea. “Get away from me, don't touch me,” he hissed, raising his arm awkwardly before his face as if warding off a blow. “I don't know what you're talking about. We share nothing between us...no feelings, no interests. We never did. I'm not even your son...”

“You're lying, Todd...and you know it,” Peter countered with a furtive smile. “Father and son? No...but that's hardly relevant now. We share a history that runs much deeper than that--a special history that speaks loudly of our similarities...much louder than all your feeble protests to the contrary. Think about it, boy,” he urged, his voice soft and seductive. “You can't deny the things we have between us...all those moving, poignant memories.” Peter stepped closer as he spoke, watching Todd's face intently. “Remember all the lessons I taught you growing up, all the...games we played?” His eyes gleamed, eagerly noting every nuance of the younger man's reaction. Long, spidery fingers stretched out, inching cautiously toward Todd's upraised forearm. “Remember all the times I touched you...and you responded?” he prompted gently. Todd jerked his arm out of reach, sucking his breath in sharply as the cold fingers made contact. He staggered back a step on dangerously unsteady legs. Peter followed quickly, gliding up beside him. “Think of all those long nights we spent together, boy...all the secret doors I unlocked in your mind...the experiences we shared. Remember all those warm, yielding bodies...how I taught you to use them...how they eased your rage? Remember all the pleasure...the pain?” he purred softly, running a fingertip lightly down a strand of Todd's hair. “You remember pain...don't you Todd...? How it frees the mind? How it...opens the soul...?”

As if summoned by his father's words, fresh pain encircled Todd's head like a crushing span of jagged metal wire, grinding relentlessly inward through imaginary flesh and bone. Disoriented, he rubbed his forehead, closing his eyes in agony as the apparition slipped noiselessly behind him. Todd jumped, his muscles convulsing involuntarily, as the voice suddenly materialized on the opposite side of his head, unnervingly close. “Admit it, Todd...” the voice breathed, cold and cunning. “I never abused you, boy...you wanted it. You can't deny to me that you enjoyed it. I was there. I had you in my hands, my mouth. I felt your arousal...I gave you release...

You can hide from yourself, but not from me...I know who you are...” the voice hissed accusingly. “I watched you learn to enjoy all of it, just as I did...especially those women. I saw you take pleasure in their touch...satisfaction in their pain. If I'm a monster, boy...then so are you...equally and irresistibly drawn to the forbidden, the wicked...the sick...” Reaching swiftly from behind, bloodless fingers swept the left side of Todd's neck, gathering the loose strands of his long hair and moving them gently aside. “So why fight it, boy?” Peter whispered softly, his breath cold against the newly bared skin. “Fighting...never helped you before...”

* * * *

“He's not looking at us right now,” Todd whispered back, grinning at Téa conspiratorially, relieved that she had stopped crying. “There's all kinds of weird stuff going on,” he confided. “The guardian's confused. He's trying to figure out what to do about you. He's feeling things that he doesn't like, it's messing up everything--all of his plans. He's not sure what's happening...”

“Will he come back?” Téa asked softly...

“He's not gone...he's just not paying attention. He's busy watching Todd right now,” he replied. “If you try to get up or leave, he'll see you--so you can't do that...okay?” He searched her face, worry evident in his soft eyes. “Just stay here and talk to me for a little while longer. I never get to talk to you anymore...”

He gazed at her sadly, twisting a strand of her hair nervously between his fingers. “When he finally gets everything figured out, he'll look at us again and he'll make me leave...and I...I'm not sure I'll ever get to see you again.” A shadow of fear crept across his face. He paused, eyes going blank as he turned his attention inward momentarily, listening. “Something's going down...way deep inside...something big,” he said quietly, his voice filled with awe. “I... I don't know what's going to happen either...”

Focusing on her again, he brightened visibly. “But, we can be together right now for just a little while. Does that make you happy, Téa? Are you happy...even just a little bit happy to see me?” he asked haltingly. “I...I wanted to be with you, so I just slipped out when no one was looking...to keep you company...to...to touch you one more time,” he said, tracing her cheekbone gently with his fingertips. Sadness suddenly clouded the hazel eyes that searched hers inquiringly. “If you're tired of me, now... If you don't want me to be here anymore... I can go away...”

Téa's mind instantly snapped back to all the nasty, gut wrenching stories that she had heard during the evening. “No...! Oh no, mijo,” she replied, stroking his face affectionately. “You make me very, very happy.” She managed a smile in the midst of her tears. “Please...stay. There's no one that I would rather be with right now,” she added, trying to reassure him...

Suddenly she realized that the admission was not just a kindness on her part, it was the absolute truth. He didn't know it, but he was heaven sent... a welcome sanctuary, a sweet oasis of honesty and affection in the middle of all her confusion and distress. You have no idea how much I need you right now...she thought sadly, looking at his beautiful, smiling face...

As she watched his eyes light up, she wondered what enormous struggles were going on inside of him. What event had prompted the sudden switch. What had brought this one to her at this precise moment? A comforting thought suddenly dawned... Maybe you do know, Todd...maybe on some level you know exactly what I need...and you sent it to me the only way you could...through him...

“Then promise you won't cry anymore,” he demanded, sliding his arms in close around her shoulders and shaking her playfully. “I want you to think happy thoughts when you're with me...nothing else...”

“I'll try,” she responded quietly, smiling...forcing herself to sound convincing for his sake. Searching the deep softness of his eyes, she was suddenly overcome with longing for him. The events of the evening had unraveled her nerves to a dangerous degree. She so desperately wanted some release, some escape from the hell that surrounded her. She tried to tell herself that he was just a boy, that he had no power here, that he was only a moments respite from the never ending nightmare of this evening. But none of those sane, logical arguments could make a dent in her distressed emotions. She couldn't change the way she felt. She only knew that he was here, that he was the part of Todd that needed her, that wanted her, that loved her completely--in a totally uncomplicated way. Her soul fled to him, to the peaceful comfort of his presence, seeking refuge in his willing embrace...

Slipping her hands up behind his shoulders, she pulled him in, inviting him to relax against her, to make full body contact. He gave her a questioning look, but responded happily. Sliding his arms up on the pillow around her head, he settled down over her, bringing his face close beside hers. As he came near, she startled him by touching her soft lips to his cheek. He turned his face to her hungrily and she rewarded him with a full, sensuous kiss. He reciprocated beautifully, reminding her a lot more of the Todd who had started to make love to her earlier in the evening than the boy who had shared pizza and kisses with her in the penthouse. When they broke contact, he continued to kiss her mouth, her cheek, then snuggled his face affectionately into her neck. He nuzzled her playfully, his lips brushing warm and soft against her skin. “Téa...” he whispered into her ear. “If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad...?”

She wanted to laugh out loud. The question seemed so ludicrous after all that she had been through this night. “I promise...” she replied, smiling to herself. “At this point I don't think there's anything that you could say that would make me mad...”

He was quiet for a moment, weighing his options. “You know that I love you...right?” he asked softly. “You know that I would never make you do anything that you don't want to do...” He raised his head to look at her, his eyes full of concern and longing... “You do know that, don't you...? You're not afraid of me...?”

Téa suddenly was afraid--not of him, but of what he was about to say. “No... I'm not afraid of you...” she responded gently. “I know that you love me. I...I love you, too...”

The look of concern vanished from his face, leaving only the yearning, the desperation in his eyes. He moved his hand down from her pillow, touching her temple lightly with his fingertips. His lower lip quivered slightly as he slid his fingers delicately down the side of her face toward her mouth. “Would you...would you let me show you how much I love you...?” he whispered gently, his eyes glistening with emotion in the candlelight. “I promise I won't hurt you...”

* * * *

Todd flinched--raw pain slicing down through his body as Peter's voice hissed coldly in his ear. “Accept it, Todd... You can't fight it...it's useless. A leopard can't change his spots,” Peter continued, his lips curving in a cruel smile. “You can't escape who you are. It's in those Lord genes of yours. I just provided the perfect environment...the perfect little setting to bring out all your natural gifts. You're right...I was a good teacher, you did follow my examples...because you had to, boy. Because it's inside of you, just like it's in me...all that darkness, the hatred, those barely controlled urges...

You've tried fighting it before, Todd...but it doesn't work. All your fears and hatreds...all those vengeful obsessions inside just twist and distort everything you try to do. Look at what's happened in your life...what's happening now. That monster inside won't let you behave like a normal person...It drives you to manipulate and destroy everything and everyone...particularly women...”

Peter paused, watching with satisfaction as a shudder of pain rippled down Todd's body. “Your adventures with women are legendary, boy,” he chuckled softly. “Look at how you abuse them. How you like to outsmart and humiliate them. You like to have them under your power, just as I do--because they make you feel weak and stupid,” he prodded, moving his lips closer to Todd's ear. “You loved the way it felt to hold that Saybrooke woman down, to force yourself on her. You loved feeling her fight you, feeling all that fear... When you exploded inside of her, you owned her...her soul was yours. I know that feeling...” he whispered softly. “I know it well...” Peter's open palm began to slide slowly down Todd's left arm. “You like the way it feels right now, with this one...” he continued, gently. “You like the way you can make her shiver...make her cry. You're turned on by the way she's radiating all that confusion, all that fear and passion mixed together. You're fascinated by the way she loves you. You want to play with her, frighten her...mess with her mind...”

“Shut up!” Todd cried, hysteria building inside him as each soft, stinging word penetrated his consciousness and found it's mark. “I'm nothing like you... I don't do that stuff anymore. I don't have those feelings now.” Lurching away from Peter, he managed to stumble a short distance forward. “I love Téa...” he groaned, rubbing his hand across his eyes. “I would never hurt her--or any other woman...not anymore. I don't want to have...don't allow myself to have those...thoughts...”

“Bullshit, boy,” Peter chuckled. “Look at you. You're squirming in your skin right now...just dying to fuck this little Puerto Rican slut against her will. You don't want her to open up to you willingly. No...you want to hurt her, make her pay for the sins of the other one, for the sin of being soft and beautiful...and female. You want to confuse her, provoke her...terrify her until she starts fighting and tightens up... Then, like an animal, you can rip through those delicate, constricted barriers with that big cock of yours...and blast her right over the edge, right into the pit of hell. Don't try to tell me that you aren't twitching all over inside for it... I can feel it, Todd...

You forget...I know what kind of twisted little shit you are...” he continued, slipping up silently behind Todd once more. “I've seen you in action with other women in the past...remember? I've watched you punish them, vent your pathetic fury on them--pound them until they're raw and aching, begging for mercy...All because they reminded you of her... The woman you can't forgive, the woman who betrayed you...

You haven't changed, Todd. Females still unhinge you. The same monster that brutalized those whores and raped innocent, helpless women is still screaming for revenge inside you right now. You're wound up so tight that you're about to explode. You're coming apart at the seams...Look at what's happening here tonight. You're losing the fight, Todd...you can't handle it anymore,” he goaded gently, lips close behind Todd's ear. “Your obsession's got you by the balls this time, boy. Your control is slipping away...

You should have stayed with the blonde. She was different...she was safe. She didn't remind you of anyone...” Peter sneered ruthlessly. “But no...you had to go out and find this little dark haired bitch...a living, breathing personification of all your painful memories. She's got the same soft beauty, the gentleness, the same beguiling flaws and weaknesses...the same capacity for betrayal and desertion. She's so much like her that you can't stand it. Loving her twists you up...hurts you...makes you feel conflicted and vulnerable again...exactly the same way you did all those years ago. She opens up all of those old wounds, resurrects all that mixed up love and hate...It scares you shitless, makes you crazy...makes you want to lose it with her...

But, you can't...and it's eating you alive,” Peter needled, his voice dripping like burning acid through the layers of Todd's consciousness. “You can't let yourself go...because you've developed this need, this love for her deep down in your soul... So you've been fighting a war with the monster--pitting your desperation for love against your compulsion for revenge. You've been trying to hang on to her and keep her at arms length at the same time--attempting to compensate somehow for all those terrifying feelings that are chewing you up inside,” he baited mercilessly. “So...tell me again, Todd. Convince me that you're normal...that there's nothing wrong with you. Tell me how you never have those nasty thoughts about women anymore. Tell me how in control you are, how you don't want to hurt her...how you love her so damn much...” he sneered softly. “If all your claims are true...then why have you been so afraid to be alone with her, why have you been working so hard to protect her all these months? Why can't you be like any other healthy, red-blooded male and just give her what she wants...?”

Pausing for a moment to let his words sink in, he watched silently as Todd stood trembling in front of him. An evil, triumphant smile spread slowly across Peter's face as he gently caressed the back of the younger man's neck, running his fingers down through the long, thick hair. “It's because deep down inside you know everything I've said here tonight is true. You know you've been playing games with yourself...and you know what you really are,” he continued, his voice soft and patronizing. “You know what will happen if you give her what she wants. We both know, Todd.” The victorious grin widened on Peter's face as he slid in for the kill. “It's already happening...right now...isn't it? That thing inside of you has already got a hold of her...and it's going to resolve the situation for you once and for all. I can feel it reaching for her even now...just aching...itching to give you the perfect release, to put an end to your twenty long years of misery...to put your hands around her throat and squeeze...”

“That's a lie!” Todd screamed, whirling to face Peter. “You shut up...shut the fuck up! I don't hate Téa, I love her. I'm not compensating for anything! I'm not pretending she's anybody else...!” he shouted angrily. “I'm not trying to hurt her!” Grabbing his left temple, he cried out as a shaft of white hot pain exploded through him. Gasping in agony, he gestured shakily in Téa's general direction. “...That's... that's not me...”

Peter paused in his predatory creep towards Todd, adopting a relaxed stance. Laughing softly, he fixed the younger man with an appraising, bemused stare. “Well, somebody around here keeps grabbing her by the neck, boy... Just who the hell do you suppose it is...?”

* * * *

Téa's stomach tightened painfully, her mind reeling in turmoil. Conflicting emotions so overwhelmed her that she couldn't think or speak for a moment. She wanted him so badly, so intensely that it hurt way down deep inside--making her want to scream in tortured frustration. She closed her eyes, contemplating the possibilities. He was so amazingly sweet, so beautiful, so touchingly vulnerable--and he wanted her so completely, so selflessly. She wanted desperately to give in to him, to forget all the objections that sprang to her mind and lose herself in his comforting, healing presence. But there was one inescapable obstacle that she couldn't easily dismiss--emotionally, psychologically, he was only fourteen years old...

He watched her face, seeing the confusion and doubt become more and more pronounced. “Don't think about that, don't. Please, Téa... I know how to love you. I...I know what women like...what you need...” he begged urgently, gently smoothing the soft hair in front of her ear with his fingertips. “I...I know I seem young...but I'm not really a kid. Believe me...please...” he urged softly...

He paused, swallowing. “I've had sex, but I've never made love... I've always wanted to know what that's like... What it's like to touch a woman, to be inside a woman that I really love. Téa, I want you so much...” he pleaded, searching her eyes deeply. “Let me make love to you...” A gentle, sympathetic smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. He stroked the curve of her jaw softly with the knuckles of his hand, his thumb caressing her chin. “I'll be so easy, so careful with you...I promise,” he whispered. “I know you're scared, you're confused about everything right now...so am I. But trust me, please. Let me make us both feel better... Let me do this... Let me make you happy...”

He touched her lips with his fingers. She could feel him trembling slightly. Softly, he began to kiss her--exquisitely gentle, sweet caresses that became more and more intimate, more insistent and erotic with each encounter. As his contact with her became rougher, more physical, she responded in spite of herself, melting into him, sliding her hands seductively over his back...

The muscles under her hands were hard and strong, his body heavy and compelling against her. It was the warm, sensual body of a man--not a boy. Téa couldn't help herself. She wanted his body, his innocence, his gentleness. She wanted to feel the depth, the purity of his love, to give him what he wanted so desperately--to make him happy... She offered no resistance as he gently moved her left arm to the pillow so that he could stroke her body as he kissed her. An adrenaline charged thrill ran up her spine as he caressed her softly, sliding his hand slowly down her side, pausing to squeeze her breast. A frantic voice screamed a warning in her mind as his hand stole lightly down to her hip, then slipped easily between their bodies...

Blocking out everything but his touch, she let go...tossing aside all her fears, all the vague misgivings... The only sounds she allowed herself to hear were the wet, delicious sounds that his lips made against her skin, the sound of his breathing, and the pounding of her own heart...

* * * *

“No... that's not true...! That isn't me that keeps hurting her. I don't treat her like that,” Todd cried, trying to focus through the pain...

“Of course it's you...” Peter said, moving closer again, his voice soft and silky... “You took that monster inside your mind and divided it up into neat little parts...so that you could let it out to play, but still pretend that it wasn't you. You gave it lots of different names...and a nice strong body to play with. That way you could be who you wanted to be, do what you wanted to do...and never have to admit the truth, never have to shoulder the guilt. You were very, very clever, Todd...

But you made one fatal mistake. While you were busy parceling yourself out, you created an assassin...a nasty little attack dog to help you out when you couldn't handle things anymore. Unfortunately, you put too much of the monster...too much of your hate and rage, your need for revenge into this particular little creation...and things got out of hand. Now it's like a pit bull, Todd...that you keep locked up here inside.” He leaned closer, tapping Todd's forehead with one long finger. “It's a personal demon that you unleash on the unsuspecting world whenever the mood strikes you,” he whispered ominously. “...And you've already let it out tonight...to get her, boy...because you couldn't face the truth about your feelings...”

“I don't unleash anything on anybody,” Todd snapped, trying desperately to clear his head, to find a way to distance himself from the stinging words that he could no longer bear to hear. “I get pissed, I lose control sometimes and this...this rage comes out. But I don't do it on purpose. I...I can't control it,” he finished lamely, backing nervously away from Peter's upraised hand...

“That's total crap, Todd.” Peter grinned maliciously, openly advancing on the younger man again. “You created it. You hide it inside with all the other broken pieces of your soul. You feed it and play with it...cling to it like a demented, jealous lover. Then you sic it on people when you get the urge...” he sneered, grabbing for Todd's shoulder. “...When poor little Todd just can't take it anymore. When he needs someone to do the dirty work...”

Sidestepping quickly, Todd slid out of reach again, trying to process what he was hearing. “No...I don't do that!” he cried, fear and pain merging into an unbearable pounding at his temples. He felt panic rising inside as Peter kept moving closer and grabbing at him. “I've...I've never hurt anybody on purpose. It just happens. I get mad. I start thinking about hurting someone...and...and he just comes--even when I tell him that it was a mistake...that I don't need him!” he shouted. Suddenly, crippled by excruciating pain, he clutched his head tightly between his hands. A scream ripped from his throat as the pain crackled through his mind and body, twisting him inside out...

“Did you hear that, Todd? Did you hear what you just said...?” Peter cackled gleefully. “You just admitted it, boy... It comes when you call it, when you need it...your faithful, obedient servant!” Peter rose to his full height, looming above Todd as the younger man bent over double, temporarily blind and helpless from the agonizing pain. “And for what? What...you arrogant, spineless little shit? Why do you need it? Why did you create it?” he snarled, cruel and menacing. “Just because mommy didn't love you anymore? Just because she left you all alone?” Peter's huge hand suddenly snapped like a steel trap around the back of Todd's neck, jerking him up savagely like a limp rag doll. “Just because you couldn't deal with women...with all their lies and betrayals...?” Peter hissed, yanking Todd closer, his eyes glittering with undisguised malice and lust. His long, icy fingers spread out across Todd's cringing chest...digging deeply into his flesh. “Or...was it just because your fragile, little psyche couldn't deal with..... Daddy...?”

For one suspended, breathless moment everything was still and quiet...and calm... Then the cold, clutching hand began to move...sliding inexorably downward...

To be continued...