“Pregnant?” Doug said “She’s pregnant?”

Pacey looked at the floor “Ok, just keep saying it. Twist the knife a little more.”

“How the hell did this happen?” Doug asked

“What, didn’t you and dad ever have that little talk about the birds and the bees?”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Doug told him “A week ago didn’t you two tell me you knew what you were doing?”

“We thought we did.” Pacey replied “Now...I’m just so confused. I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, whatever you decide to do, I’ll understand.” Doug told him “I mean it. If you decide to just walk away and send child support checks, that’s fine.”

“Are you crazy?” Pacey asked “I can’t do that. I love Tatum, I could never hurt her like that.”

“So what are you going to do?”

Pacey sat down “I don’t know. I want to do the right thing, you know?”

“What does Tatum think? Doug asked

“She’s still in shock.” Pacey replied “She doesn’t know what to do. She’s really scared, she hasn’t even told her sisters yet. It’s like she’s looking to me for answers, and I’m looking to her for the same answers at the same time. There’s just so much going on in my head right now. I’m confused, happy, scared, lost, you name it. I feel like I’m drowning or something.”

* * * *

“It’s such a weird feeling.” Tatum said to Abby and Andie “I feel like I’m at the bottom off a pool with weights tied to my feet and I’m drowning and I’ve got no one to save me.”

Andie reached out and took her hand “You have us. And you have Pacey. He said he’d be there for you, right?”

Tatum nodded “But sometimes I feel like I can’t even talk to him about it. I’m so scared.”

“Oh, Tate, it’s ok.” Abby said, putting her arm around her “We’re behind you no matter what you decide to do.”

“But you need to tell your sisters.” Andie added

“Oh they are just going to love this.” Tatum muttered “Bessie’s going to have a heart attack. Joey’s going to be all ‘I told you so.’ because she did.”

“Hey, we’re home.” Joey called as she and Bessie entered “Tatum, you would not believe how crowded the grocery store was.”

“Yeah, uh-huh, that’s great.” Tatum said disinterestedly

“Something wrong?” Bessie asked

“Actually, yeah. Something is wrong.” Tatum replied “Maybe you guys should sit down.”

“What’s up?” Joey said as she and Bessie sat down

Tatum took a deep breath “This is really hard for me to say> In fact, I’m not even sure how I should say it. Uh, Andie, Abby?”

“You’re on your own.” Andie replied

“Ok.” Tatum sighed “Jo, Bessie, I’m pregnant.”

Joey gasped “You’re....you’re *what*?”

“Pregnant.” Tatum repeated

“Oh my God.” Bessie whispered, leaning on the arm of the couch to support herself “Tatum, what? How?”

“I’m gonna kill Pacey.” Joey muttered “I’m gonna fucking kill him.”

“Joey, please, it wasn’t his fault.” Tatum whined “Well, not entirely his fault.” she looked at her older sister “Bessie? You ok?”

Bessie closed her eyes “This isn’t exactly my dream for you.”

“How can you be so calm about this?” Joey shrieked

“Oh, I’m not calm about it at all. It just hasn’t sunk in yet.”

Abby and Andie stood up “Gee.” Andie said “What do you say at a time like this, uh, bye!”

“Oh, for the love of God, take me with you!” Tatum pleaded

* * * *

“Hey, Joey.” Pacey said “Is Tatum home?”

“Get lost.” Joey muttered “You are the last person on earth I want to see right now.”

“She told you, huh? I don’t hear you congratulating us.”

“Yeah, well, that must be my fault, because I’m not!” Joey snapped “Now get lost!”

“Fine.” Pacey replied “I just want you to know that I have every intention of standing by Tatum no matter what she decides to do.”

“Uh-huh, that’s great.” Joey said “Now leave!”

* * * *

“Tatum?”

“Oh, hey.” Tatum said

“I thought I’d find you out here.” Pacey said “I just talked to Joey.”

“She didn’t take the news too well.” Tatum sighed

“No, she didn’t.” Pacey agreed “But she’ll get over it.”

“Will she? She keeps telling me I’ve ruined my life, and I’m starting to think she’s right.”

Pacey sat down next to her “We need to talk about what we’re going to do.”

“I’ve already decided.” Tatum said “I’m getting an abortion.”

“You’re what?” Pacey said “Oh, so you just decided what to do without even talking to me.”

Tatum immediately got defensive “You think that this has been easy for me? Well I’ve got news for you, it hasn’t! It’s been living hell!”

Pacey put his arms around her “Hey, it’s alright. I know this hasn’t been easy. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.”

“No, you know what? You’re right.” Tatum insisted “It’s your child, too. You should have some say in what we do about it.” she wiped her eyes “I’m just so scared and confused. I don’t really know what I want. I mean, I can say a million times that I’m going to get an abortion, but I don’t think I could really go through with it.”

“It’s ok.” Pacey told her “You just need more time to think.”

“What do you think we should do?” Tatum asked

“To be honest, I think we should keep it.” Pacey said “I’m not even sure why, that’s just how I feel.”

Tatum nodded “Maybe you’re right. I just don’t know. Listen, I need to get to work, and then I’ve got an appointment with an OB/GYN. I’ll stop by later and let you know how it went.”

* * * *

“So you really aren’t sure what you’re going to do?” Abby asked

Tatum shook her head “Pacey wants to keep it. He seems so excited about being a dad, and I have to admit, I’m kind of excited too. In that, you know, scared to death, barely clinging to my sanity way.”

“But you’ve decided not to get an abortion.” Andie said

“I don’t know.” Tatum sighed “I always used to think ‘That will never happen to me, and if it does, I’ll no just what to do.’ But now it has happened to me, and I have no idea what to do. I mean, if it was one of you who was pregnant, I’d tell you to get an abortion or put the baby up for adoption, but it’s not you, it’s me, and I don’t think I can take my own advice. In the back of my mind, I just don’t think I can give my baby up.”

“You know what I think you should do?” Andie said “Go to your appointment, talk to the doctor about your options, and just take a few days off from work and school to think about it.”

“You’re probably right.” Tatum agreed

“Of course she is.” Abby said

“Hey, Potter!” Tatum’s boss yelled from across the store “I’m not paying you to chat with your friends!”

“Sorry, Ms. Finizio!” Tatum replied “Yeah, whatever you fat dried up old hog.” she muttered

“What was that?!”

Tatum thought fast “I said ‘I always wanted to visit Prague.’”

“Oh, yeah, me too.”

Tatum flashed her friends a weak smile “Whoever was the fool who said you can’t learn anything useful from ‘South Park’?”

Andie burst out laughing “I always wondered if that would work in real life.”

Abby nodded “I’m glad to see your sense of humor is unscathed.”

“Not completely.” Tatum said “I just don’t really feel like myself ever since I found out about the baby. But I guess that’s to be expected.”

“Of course it is.” Abby told her “I mean, your whole world is changing. It makes sense that you might change a little, too.”

* * * *

“Is everything ok?” Tatum asked

“Seems ok.” Dr. Hawthorn replied. She turned the screen a little so Tatum could see it from the table she was lying on “Would you like to see your baby?”

Tatum stared at the tiny little blob on the screen “That’s my baby?’ she whispered “It looks so little. It’s hard to believe that something so small can grow into a person.”

“Amazing, isn’t it?” Dr. Hawthorn said “I always thought that the way those itty bitty little embryos grow into babies was so fascinating.”

“Itty bitty?” Tatum repeated, giggling “Is that a medical term?” Dr. Hawthorn smiled “I love seeing those little cell masses develop into little people. That’s part of the reason I became an OB/GYN. And girls like you are the reason I also became a counselor at a Teen Mom center.”

“Really?” Tatum asked

“Oh, absolutly. You see, Tatum, when most teenage girls get pregnant, they’re afraid that their whole futures are ruined. And too often, they end up never finishing school, they’re on welfare at the age of 20, and they’re all alone with their babies. Some of them, like myself, are lucky enough to have supportive families and boyfriends, and they’re able to get an education and have bright futures, and still have time for their babies.” she pulled a small picture out of her pocket and showed it to Tatum “That’s me with my son, Anthony, when he was a year old. I was younger than you when he was born. He’s 18 now, and he’s the smartest, sweetest boy I’ve ever known. His father and I are still married, and we’re even happier now than we were on our weddingday.”

“That’s pretty amazing.” Tatum agreed, impressed “Especially considering that 20 years ago teen mothers faced a lot more challenges than they do today.”

Dr. Hawthorn nodded “Unfortunatly, even today a teen mother who has a future like mine is a rare exception. Too often they end up dropping out of school and holding down part time jobs to give their children a chance at a bright future. They’re lucky if even their families and boyfriends stand by them. Which reminds me, how does your family feel about this?”

Tatum sighed “Well, I live with my two sisters-half sisters, actually. Bessie has actually been pretty cool about it. She has her own son who’s almost a year old now, so she can sort of relate to what I’m going through. And Joey...well, Joey’s not quite so understanding.”

“Where are your parents?” Dr. Hawthorn asked

“My mother’s been dead for a year.” Tatum replied “And Bessie and Joey’s mom is dead, too. Our dad is in jail for dealing drugs, and he’ll probably be staying there until after I graduate high school. I haven’t told him about this yet.”

“And the father of your baby?”

“Pacey.” Tatum sighed “He lives with his older brother. His father died in January, his mom took off for California to live with her sisters and has written maybe twice since she left.”

“How does he feel about this whole thing?”

“Actually, he’s really happy about it.” Tatum said “He wants to keep the baby.”

Dr. Hawthorn nodded “And is that how you feel?”

Tatum shook her head, then nodded, then shrugged “I just don’t know. I mean, I want to have kids someday. I just never dreamed it would happen so soon.”

* * * *

“Hi, Doug.” Tatum said “Is Pacey home?”

“Yeah, he’s here. Come on in.” Doug replied “Pacey! Tatum’s here!”

Pacey came down the stairs “Hey. Doug, could I talk to Tatum alone?”

“Yeah, sure.” Doug said

“What’s up?” Pacey asked

Tatum held out the ultrasound photo “Our baby’s first picture.”

“Wow.” Pacey said “That little dot’s my kid?”

“Actually, that dot’s just a dot.” Tatum giggled “That dot right there is your kid.”

“So, how’d it go?”

“With the doctor? Fine.” Tatum replied “She was really nice. Turns out she’s also a counselor at a Teen Mom support center, and she was a teen mom herself. Talking to her helped me realize how lucky I am that I’ve got you and my family and friends behind me. A lot of girls are lucky if they even have their parents to support them.”

“So, have you thought about what you want to do?” Pacey asked

Tatum smiled and nodded “I want to keep the baby. I thought about it over and over, I decided that I couldn’t live with myself if I gave my baby up.”

“Have you told your sisters yet?”

“Not yet. I’m not really sure how they’re going to react.” Tatum sighed “I think Bessie will understand, but I have a feeling I’ll have to keep any and all sharp objects out of Joey’s reach for a while. And I wanted to tell you first.”

“Well, I think it’s great.” Pacey said “And I know we’ll be just fine.”

“You know, I think you’re right.” Tatum agreed

* * * *

Part 19 coming soon!

© Copyright 1999 by Femme Fatale Fanfic (FFFF) productions

Back to Tessa's Stories | Back to Fan Fiction | Back to the Main Page This page has been visited times.