May 30, 2010:  Things you would never know if you did not
browse the tabloids while waiting for your wife at the coun-
ter in the supermarket – this week's headlines:


   'I HATE YOU!'
Oprah and Gayle's public screaming match

                                                                          [courtesy National Enquirer]


Shocking report from Saudi clone lab
  Saddam Hussein's EAR is alive!


                                                      [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Living in a bus
  Loretta Lynn forced out of her home


                                                                                          [courtesy National Examiner]


Caroline Kennedy:  What's wrong with her NOSE?

                                                                                            [courtesy National Examiner]


Government economy measure
  Hillbillies
recruited to guard Fort Knox

                                                                                      [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Dumb news from Indiana:
The Martin County Zoning Board nixed plans for a rural
nudist camp between Franklin and Martinsville. . . .

Four tigers were seized at a tattoo parlor in Gary. . . .

Danica  Patrick  was  booed  at the Indianapolis Motor
Speedway after blaming a  poor  qualifying  run  on her
car.

                                      [courtesy Associated Press]



Dumb news from Kentucky:
Governor  Stevie  called a special session of the General Assembly to
consider expanding the number of bourbon-tasting licenses (along with
a state budget, which the legislature failed to pass in its regular 60-day
session that ended in April). . . .

A former baseball coach at the
Breathitt County Christian school that
got a $100,000 appropriation  from the state's House of Representa-
tives was arrested for child sex abuse. . . .

Mr. Cocky-Doodle-Doo, a little red rooster in the back yard of a cul-
de-sac residence in Erlanger,  who not only does what roosters do  at
the crack of dawn  but also chased dogs and little children through the
neighborhood, failed to win an exemption from the city's "No livestock
or poultry" ordinance.
                                                                                    [courtesy AP
]

Quotation of the week:
"To say that Sarah Palin is a politician mistakes a splashy debut for the breathless
 melodrama that now constantly engulfs her.   It's like saying that Paris Hilton is a
 hotel heiress or that Jon Gosselin is a husband."
                                                                                   – Jack Hitt, in Harper's

Quotations of the weak
:

"Maybe sometimes accidents happen."
                                                              – Rand Paul, Republican nominee for Senator
                                                                 from Kentucky, referring to the BP oil spill


"Oh, well, that's California.''
                                              – Jeanetta Girard, in reference to the following photo news item




Tabloid headlines poll/contest:

Name that haircut!  It's not a mullet.  What is it?

Winner gets a free subscription to Tabloid Headlines.

Birthdays:
John Hinckley, 55
Pam Grier, 61
Hank Williams Jr., 61
Gale Sayers, 67
Carroll Baker, 79

Borf's weekly BONUS:
Hundreds of rats, some the size of 5-month-old kittens, were
removed from a home in Las Cruces, New Mexico. . . .Elec-
tion officials have prohibited wearing chicken suits outside the
polls in Nevada  (but voting in a chicken suit will be allowed).
. . . A Spanish matador was gored in the roof of his mouth. ...
The opening of the Dostoevsky metro station in Moscow was
delayed after people complained  that  mosaics (including one
of a man striking a woman with an axe and one of a man hold-
ding a gun to his head) were depressing. . . . Researchers con-
cluded that women who marry much older men or much youn-
ger men have increased risks of death. . . .  Austrian traffic en-
gineers hired druids to drain  negative  energy  from high-acci-
dent areas. . . . A Chinese martial arts expert pulled a half-ton
airplane five meters with a rope attached to his eyelids. ... The
"teacher of the year" in Gwinnett County, Georgia,  seduced a
17-year-old student who went to her for help with  his  home-
work. . . . A history teacher in Lumpkin County,Georgia, said
she  regretted  allowing students to parade through the school
cafeteria dressed as the Ku Klux Klan  for a film project  ("In
hindsight,"  she said, . . .).  A high school senior in Bartlett, Illi-
nois, said he regretted spreading oil on the hall floors,  causing
a severe back injury to a custodian  and less serious injuries to
several students ("In hindsight," he said, . . .).  A second grader
who ordered a digital yearbook in Homosassa, Florida, got in-
stead  a DVD of her teacher's husband's  pornography  collec-
tion. . . .An elderly Chicago couple were found buried alive un-
der mounds of garbage in their South Side home. . . .A woman
called 911 in Eau Claire,  Wisconsin,  to complain that her hus-
band was not divorced from his first wife. . . . A man was fined
for setting his bull python free in the hall of a "pet friendly" Holi-
day Inn in Mason City,  Iowa. . . .Two persons died climbing a
frozen waterfall in Yellowstone National Park. .  .  . Willie Nel-
son got a haircut.






                            [courtesy Harper's, Snopes, Obscure, AP]

Unopened e-mail last week included messages from "Zachariah Moon"
        and "Coy Sparks."


DISCUSSION GROUP:

      Don't  forget!   Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events  are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky,  just after church every Sunday.  Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include Maxito Isenhower.


"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary entertainment" -- Karen Crockett


Previous issue

Next issue

Archives index                    
Borf Books        borf@borfents.com            Ideas for a Better America
Box 413                                                      The Columbus Book of Euchre
Brownsville KY 42210                   War Stories:  The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer

    (270) 597-2187          Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher         Natty Bumppo, writer/editor



May 23, 2010:   Things you would never know if you did not
browse the tabloids while waiting for your wife at the counter
in the supermarket – this week's headlines:


MUMBAI HEIRESS MARRIES ELEPHANT
                       believes he's her reincarnated fiancÚ

                                               [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


South Pacific
  Island people worship plumbers
            – and they don't even have running water!

                                         [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


'I'm fed up living a lie!'
  Laura Bush demands divorce
                 Plus: Her secret plastic surgery

                                                    [courtesy the Globe]


Dumb news from Indiana:
Republican Mark Souder became the latest "family values" Congress-
man to admit having an affair with a staffer (and he resigned). . . .


The state Supreme Court opened a Twitter account.

                                                            [courtesy Associated Press]

Dumb news from Kentucky:
A Louisville policewoman accused of embezzling $1,600 from an offi-
cers association treasury and found to have produced a forged receipt
for the money was suspended for 20 days. . . .

A dead woman got 1,002 votes in the primary election for city council
in Georgetown, promoting her to the general election in November. . . .

The baby giraffe was named Crosby.

                                              [courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal
]

Quotations of the week:
"Critics always note that Nixon looked crummy in the debates – the 5 o'clock shadow,
 the sweats, the sideways glances, the tugging at his infamous dewlaps.   But those ges-
 tures were merely symptoms of what Nixon was doing.  And Nixon was the last poli-
 tician ever to do it on live TV.  He was thinking."
                                                                                            – Jack Hitt, in Harper's

"Wait for the long gloomy nights and dark days soaked with blood.  What is happening
 to you nowadays is just a drizzle."
                                                      – Iraqi insurgent Lideen Allah Abu Suleiman, celebrating
                                                         recent terrorist bombings that left 119 people dead

Quotation of the weak
:

"Sinking somebody else's boat in peacetime is clearly an act of war."

                                                     
– Daniel Schorr,, on National Public Radio

Birthdays:
Jewel Kilcher, 36
Pat Hurst (no, not Patty Hearst), 41
Bernie Taupin, 60
Misty Morgan, 65
Ted Kaczynski, 68
Jim Lehrer, 76
Mac Wiseman, 85

Borf's weekly BONUS:
Two signs saying "Yeild to bikes" were taken down in Sparks,
Nevada.  .  .  . On a dare,  an outfielder on the Powell Valley,
Virginia, high school  baseball  team  pulled out his whang and
pissed on the field during the National Anthem.  .  .  .  London
Mayor Boris Johnson called the Liberal Democrats' parliamen-
tary maneuvering "ludicrous skullduggery," and the resulting co-
alition a "cross between a bulldog and a chihuahua." . . .  Beni-
gno "Noynoy" Aquino III was expected to win the presidency
of the Philippines while Ferdinand "Bongbong" Marcos Jr.,  I-
melda Marcos,  President Gloria Arroyo,  and  boxer  Manny
Pacquiao  were elected to Congress.  .  .  .  A prostitute at the
Hotel Valley Ho  in Scottsdale,  Arizona,  punctured  a  valet's
scalp  with her stiletto heel  after he called a regular yellow cab
for her instead of a  sedan.  . . .  Contractors were building 1,-
100  new houses  in Las Vegas as more than 15,000 new and
foreclosed houses remained empty. . . . A 24-year-old man in
Chicopee,  Massachusetts,  offered an employee at a conveni-
ence store his 3-month-old daughter in trade for two 40-ounce
beers (the child's mother was inside the store buying cigarettes).
.  .  .  A math teacher in Birmingham, Alabama, diagrammed an
Obama assassination attempt to demonstrate a geometry lesson.
. . . A school bus driver in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, was found to
be crapping in plastic bags and throwing them from the bus (and
a man in the neighborhood caught her on video). .  .  .  A school
bus taking children to an amusement park in Attica,Ohio, driven
by a drunk, wound up in a ditch. . . . Lindsay Lohan blamed her
father, who was not traveling with her, for losing her passport in
France (WWBD?). . . . Lauren Tilo, 30, an assistant principal at
a high school in Tampa, Florida, was arrested for sending a nude
photo of herself  to a 14-year-old boy she'd met in a game on line.















    [courtesy Harper's Weekly, Daily Snopes, Obscure.com, AP]

Unopened e-mail last week included messages from "Zachariah Moon"
        and "Coy Sparks."


DISCUSSION GROUP:

      Don't  forget!   Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events  are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky,  just after church every Sunday.  Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include  Simona  de Silves-
tro,  Ana Beatriz,  and Milka Duno.


HOW TO UNSUBSCRIBE:

    Remember, if you don't want to receive any more of this inane crap,
just hit your "Reply" button and type in the subject line,  "GET THESE
TABLOID HEADLINES OUT OF MY LIFE AND FUCK OFF!"

    But remember also, you have to spell and punctuate the message
exactly as it appears above – without quotation marks, and without
that redundant "Re: " that appears in so many subject lines – or you
will keep getting this shit!  ("Cut and paste" won't work, either.  We
have a special filter to detect that.)


"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary entertainment" -- Karen Crockett





Previous issue

Next issue

Archives index                    
Borf Books        borf@borfents.com            Ideas for a Better America
Box 413                                                      The Columbus Book of Euchre
Brownsville KY 42210                   War Stories:  The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer

    (270) 597-2187          Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher         Natty Bumppo, writer/editor



May 16, 2010:  Things you would never know if you did not
browse the tabloids while waiting for your wife at the coun-
ter in the supermarket – this week's headlines:


Ahmadinejad's plan to break up U.S. marriages with Persian bombshells
  FROM IRAN WITH LOVE


                                                              [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Oprah, Elvis blood cousins

                                                                                             [courtesy the Sun]


Shocking cover-up claim
 TIGER PAID COPS


                                     [courtesy National Enquirer]


602 lb. thief too fat for jail

                                                                                    [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Moon had risen
  Werewolf sues airline over flight delay


                                                                                    [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


250 lb. Penny Marshall fights for life

                                                                                                             [courtesy the Globe]


Dumb news from Indiana:
Stephen Quick II, 32, and Samantha Light,
26, of Veedersburg, each got 125 years in
prison for molesting children  2 months old
and videotaping the activity.    Light said at
her sentencing that Quick coerced her, but
she appeared to be having a good time  in
the videos.
                    [courtesy Associated Press]


In a  preview  of his eighth place finish aboard Kentucky Derby
winner Super Saver in the Preakness, jockey Calvin Borel rode
Grand Traverse to a fourth-place finish  in the James Whitcomb
Riley Stakes at Indiana Downs in Shelbyville.

                                                    [courtesy Indianapolis Star]

Dumb news from Kentucky:
The Murray State University News published a "Special SEXtion"
including statistics and anecdotes from 114 students responding to
intimate questions. . . .

Gurley Martin,  86,  a candidate for the United States Senate who
has never held public office,  pledged to limit himself to two terms.

                                                       [courtesy Associated Press]

A 45-year-old Edmonson County man was arrested  for shooting
at a school bus his wife was driving. . . .

A 39-year-old Edmonson County man was arrested  for  keeping
his girl friend's 4-year-old son in a doghouse. . . .

Nineteen motor vehicles in a row  ran a new stop sign in Browns-
ville in a demonstration of civil disobedience.

 [courtesy Edmonson News and Bowling Green radio stations]

Quotations of the week:
"Watching the White House Correspondents Dinner,  we  could
 feast on journalists schmoozing with mostly B-list show business
 folk – and sometimes C-list, as in Kim Kardashian
."
                                                                                     
– Frank Rich, in the New York Times

"Why should we feed some pirates?"
                                                            – Aleksei Kuznetsov, Russian defense ministry spokesman,
                                                               explaining why captured Somali pirates were set free

Birthdays: 
Emilio Estevez, 48
Ron Simmons, 52
Billy Swan, 68
Anna Maria Alberghetti, 74

Borf's weekly BONUS:
A mother of 15 left her 3-year-old daughter at a Wal-Mart in
Cincinnati, Ohio,  overnight,  not realizing the girl was missing
until a relative told her she had seen the child in the news. . . .
A Rastafarian refused to pay the San Diego County, Califor-
nia, fire department  $27,552  for clearing what it considered
combustible weeds from his property. .  .  .  A man drove his
burning truck to the firehouse in McMinnville, Oregon. . . . A
man in Charles County,  Maryland,  out of minutes on his cell
phone,  dialed 911  for a ride home,  telling the police he had
been robbed. .  .  .  A woman who demanded a reward for a
cell phone she found at a crash scene in Williamstown,  Penn-
sylvania,  was arrested for theft. .  .  .  A 7th grade girl and an
8th grade boy were videoed by classmates as they engaged in
oral sex while other students watched a film at a school in Ox-
nard, California. . . . For $3.99 you can hear a neighbor of Ti-
ger Woods tell you what a jerk the golfer is, on his Behind the
Gates web site. . . . Thirty thousand "barbed tampons,"  inten-
ded to deter rape, will be given away at theWorld Cup soccer
tournament  in South Africa. . . . Police responding to a com-
plaint of sexual assault in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, stepped into
a home crawling with hundreds of reptiles,  including alligators
and anacondas 30 feet long. . . . A man was arrested in What-
com County, Washington, for having sex with a goat.

[courtesy Harper's Weekly, Daily Snopes, Obscure.com, AP]

Unopened e-mail last week included a message from "noreply @zoombli.com"
       titled "Zoombli Automatic Renewal Notification."


DISCUSSION GROUP:

      Don't  forget!   Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events  are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky,  just after church every Sunday.  Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include Majella Lynch.


HOW TO UNSUBSCRIBE:

    Remember, if you don't want to receive any more of this inane crap,
just hit your "Reply" button and type in the subject line,  "GET THESE
TABLOID HEADLINES OUT OF MY LIFE AND FUCK OFF!"

    But remember also, you have to spell and punctuate the message
exactly as it appears above – without quotation marks, and without
that redundant "Re: " that appears in so many subject lines – or you
will keep getting this shit!  ("Cut and paste" won't work, either.  We
have a special filter to detect that.)


"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary entertainment" -- Karen Crockett





Previous issue

Next issue

Archives index                    
Borf Books        borf@borfents.com            Ideas for a Better America
Box 413                                                      The Columbus Book of Euchre
Brownsville KY 42210                   War Stories:  The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer

    (270) 597-2187          Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher



May 9, 2010:  Things you would never know if you did not
browse the tabloids while waiting for your wife at the coun-
ter in the supermarket – this week's headlines:

    (And we apologize to recipients whose names or addres-
ses were visible in last week's Extra! edition.   That was the
result of our misunderstanding of the e-mail system we were
experimenting with  –  it won't happen again.  You know the
old commercial saying:  Our subscriber list is not to be given
away – it's only for sale.)


Seven deadly signs prove
 
Judgment Day is 9/11/2010!
                                [courtesy the Sun]


In Lyleville, Kentucky *
  Baptist preacher puts self
  to sleep with own sermon


                    [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Child welfare agents taking Jackson's kids!

                                                                                              [courtesy the Globe]


Papuan tribesman claims to
 be rightful king of England

           [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Divorce file secrets
 Tiger had sex with
 121 WOMEN
     while married to Elin

                    [courtesy National Enquirer]


Dumb news from Kentucky:
Nine-year-old Talon Spell of Elizabethtown, 5 feet tall and once weigh-
ing 296 pounds, was down to 282 in his quest for normality  (he weigh-
ed only 5 pounds when he was born). . . .

The Dixie Belle tour boat  was knocked off its dock near Nicholasville
by another dock floating loose in the flood and took an unmanned tour
14 miles down the Kentucky River.
                                                               [courtesy Associated Press]

Explaining  his team's 2.025 combined grade point average,  the  lowest
in  the Southeastern Conference,  the University of Kentucky basketball
coach,  John  Calipari,  said the players were distracted by the hype sur-
rounding the school's 2,000th victory. . . .

An accident report revealed that the driver of a semi-trailer was talking
on his cell phone when his rig crossed the I-65 median  near  Munford-
ville in March and killed ten Mennonite family members on their way to
a wedding in Iowa (the truck driver also died). . . .

Moriah  Corey  is a basketball and track star  at  Louisville's Butler High
School. . . .

The list of names for a baby giraffe at the Louisville Zoo has been pared
to three:  Crosby, Sebastian, and Steve.

                                                  [courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal]

See  headline  above  about the Baptist pastor who preached himself to
sleep  in  "Lyleville, Kentucky."  We have found no Lyleville, Kentucky,
in the Rand McNally Road Atlas, the Rand McNally Family World At-
las,  the Hammond World Atlas,  the  Kentucky  Almanac,  the  United
States Postal Guide, or by Google; and our ubiquitous lawyer, Edwin F.
Kagin, has not claimed ever to have had a case there.  That's not to say
there isn't one, you understand.  There's a Lyleville in Pennsylvania, and
there's a "Lyleville lot" in a "colored" cemetery in Paris, Kentucky.

                                                                                     [Editor's note]

Quotations of the week:
"It's par for the course for what we have to do in Albany – fighting the forces
 of evil – these long-term, white supremacist, you know, Republican senators."

                                                    – New York State Senator Kevin Parker (D-Brooklyn)

"Nobody wants no oily shrimp."
                                                    – Jimmy Rowell, a distressed
Gulf of Mexico fisherman

"Fuck off!"
                    
– Felicia Collier, 18, to a nun at the Catholic high school she attended
                        in Massachusetts.  That's what got her expelled.  Then to her 73-year-
                        old grandmother, in Largo, Florida, when Granny told her to do her
                        homework, as she continued her education on line.   That's what got
                        her slapped.  And, that's what got Granny arrested.  Read all about it.


Birthdays:
Michael Palin, 67
Sonny Curtis, 73

Borf's weekly BONUS:
A report by the U.S. Commission on International Religious
Freedom confirmed that Muslims hate Christians, Christians
hate Muslims, and they all hate Jews. . . . Anita Smithey, of
Ovideo,  Florida,  shot her husband after warning  him  that
the sex was too rough. . . . A man altered a $10 check clo-
sing out his bank account  to  $269,951  and deposited it in
another bank's ATM in Cape Coral, Florida (he's in jail). ...
A mother was holding hostage "Gossip Girl" books her teen
daughter got at the library in  Lake Mary,  Florida.  .  .  .  A
19-year-old woman went to court in Lake County,  Illinois,
wearing a T-shirt that said, "I have the Pussy, so I make the
Rules"  (and then went straight to jail,  without  passing  Go).
. . . A high speed police chase on the streets of Atlanta end-
ed in a crash into a barber shop, injuring five men inside. . . .
Police  tasered  a 17-year-old baseball fan who ran onto the
field in Philadelphia. . . . A thunderstorm forecast helped po-
lice talk a naked man down  from a billboard in  Fort Worth,  Texas. . . . Texas Governor Rick Perry shot a coyote.

                   [courtesy Harper's Weekly, Obscure.com, AP]

Unopened e-mail last week included a message from "Leda Dagum,"
        right below an e-mail from Lena Dunham, whom we know.
        "Leda Dagum's" e-mail was titled  "Get the besst of life with
        "ggennnerric Levivtra."


DISCUSSION GROUP:

      Don't  forget!   Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events  are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky,  just after church every Sunday. Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include Felicia Collier, Fai-
sal Shahzad, and Anita Smithey.


"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary
  entertainment" -- Karen Crockett







Previous issue

Next issue

Archives index                    
Borf Books        borf@borfents.com            Ideas for a Better America
Box 413                                                      The Columbus Book of Euchre
Brownsville KY 42210                   War Stories:  The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer

    (270) 597-2187          Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher         Natty Bumppo, writer/editor



May 2, 2010:  Things you would never know if you did not
browse the tabloids while waiting for your wife at the coun-
ter in the supermarket – this week's headlines (we sold our
naming rights for a week to Bertie's Ice Cream in Browns-
ville,  for  a  hamburger – hence, the slightly altered title to-
day):


NOAH'S ARK FOUND

                                         [courtesy the Sun of London]


Baby eats $46 million Powerball ticket

                                                                              [courtesy the Sun - Weekly World News]


Obama caught in hotel with beauty

                                                                                         [courtesy the Globe]


LETTERS to the EDITOR:
FGDean@aol.com wrote Sun 25 Apr 2010 @11:35:58 PDT
re San Diego's "Geezer Bandit":
OK, I confess.  It's me.  The photographic evidence is
conclusive.

Dumb news from Indiana:
A 32-year-old employee was killed at a Kroger store  in  Franklin
by a pallet of bottled water that fell on her. . . .

Toni Morrison's novel Song of Solomon was recalled from 50 juni-
ors to whom it was assigned at Franklin High School  after a school
board member complained about its descriptive sex, profanity,  and
suicide. . . .

State and local police are running special patrols in 20 rural counties
looking for motorists not wearing seat belts

                                                           [courtesy Associated Press]

Dumb news from Kentucky:
Rascal  Flatts'  singing of the "Star Spangled Banner"  at  the  Kentucky
Derby.
                                                            [thanks a lot, NBC television]

Quotation of the week:
"If aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in
 America, which didn't turn out well for the Native Americans."
                                                                                                    – Stephen Hawking

"I think I need a lawyer."

         – Francis Howard, whose house was demolished by mistake in Denton, Texas

Quotation of the weak:
"My daughter is a roller girl who skated for the Atomic Bombshells –
 which is kind of interesting."
                                                – St. Paul, Minnesota, City Councilman Dave Thune
                                                   to a delegation visiting from Nagasaki, Japan

Birthdays:
Judy Collins, 71
Rita Coolidge, 66
Ray Parker Jr., 56
Brad Richards, 30

Bertie's weekly BONUS:
Archie Comics will introduce a gay classmate, Kevin Keller,
in the September issue of Veronica. . . . Refried bean swas-
tikas were pasted on the windows of the Arizona state cap-
itol. . . . The California Highway Patrol's South Lake Tahoe
office was shut down when officers mistook an arrestee's a-
nal vibrator
for a bomb. . . .  Philippine President Gloria Ar-
royo appointed her manicurist to the national housing board.
. . . Vacation was declared a human right in Europe.  . . .  A
woman dialed 911 six times in New Haven, Connecticut, for
a ride home from a night club. .  .  . A blind man was barred
from a restaurant in Sydney,  Australia,  by a waiter who be-
lieved his guide dog  was  gay. . . .  Meggie, a cat in San Di-
ego, has her own blog.  .  .  .  A crew demolished the wrong
house – at 724 Ruddell Street in Denton,  Texas,  instead of
the condemned No. 721 across the street. .  .  . A mother in
Cleveland, Ohio, was arrested for making her daughter hog-
tie
her 8-year-old son with duct tape  and tie him to a coffee
table every night while she slept.  .  .  .  An 18-year-old boy
dug up a "Jew girl's" corpse at a a private cemetery in Dallas,
Texas, chopped off a foot with a hatchet, put in in a bag, and
took it to the police.  . . .  A man stabbed his wife to death in
Phoenix, Arizona, and drove her corpse to the police.

[courtesy Harper's Weekly, Daily Snopes, Obscure.com, AP]

Unopened e-mail last week included messages from "Viviene Damp,"
        "Mercedes Ravitsky," and "Annabelle Panagopoulous."


DISCUSSION GROUP:

      Don't  forget!   Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events  are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky,  just after church every Sunday.  Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include Sasha Khokha.


"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary entertainment" -- Karen Crockett




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    (270) 597-2187  Anthony "Slug" Duvall, honorary publisher  Natty Bumppo, editor



Extra! edition:

Quotation of the week:
"I'm not for the death penalty; I just don't think we ought to feed them."

                                                                                                                – Jeanetta Girard