Gypsy Curses Incorporated

Do you have a problem? Stuck in a jam? A real pickle? Perhaps someone close to you is on their deathbed. Well I'll tell you something, there's probably nothing I can do about it. I mean sure I COULD go to Med school for a few years, earn a degree, and cure some disease afflicting said loved one but think of it this way, they'd probably be dead by then, and I really don't have the money, let alone the desire to do all that. But i'll tell you what I can do......

I can sell you some real live GYPSY CURSES to smite your enemies. That's right, we are the first Web Based company to offer REAL SOLUTIONS to REAL PROBLEMS.
Makja

With our expert Gypsy technician, Makja, catering to your every Gypsy Cursing need, we offer you a WIDE VARIETY of curses from which to choose. From Lepracy to the ever popular Werewolf curse, you no longer have to go to the expense of flying in Gypsy Women from Romania or the Czech Republic and paying expensive room and boarding fees to keep them from getting mad and cursing YOU! (which is something that happens quite often)

For the low, low price of 1 dollar a curse, we will make your enemies wish they had never crossed you. We also have a number of Non-Lethal curses which are great for parties, weddings, and Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. Let Makja and me make your dreams come true.

The Gypsy Curses Inc. office is located in this old Gypsy Caravan which we keep outback of my house in rural Poughkeepsie, NY. Working here we take EACH INDIVIDUAL curse and personally tailor it to suit YOUR NEEDS, by working on EACH CURSE for at least an hour. We will then do some chants and other secret Gypsy stuff. Why can't we tell you? Because it's our business and if you knew how to do it yourself you wouldn't need to send me your money would you?

Curses

Last Updated 05-02-98 by Gypsy Guy & S T A T I C -=[THE ZINE]=-