Things You Would NEVER Hear A Southerner Say
I'll take Shakespeare for $1,000, Alex.
Duct tape won't fix that!
Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael.
Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken .
We don't keep firearms in this house.
Has anybody seen the
sideburns trimmer?
You can't feed that to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe.
Wrasslin's fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
Do you think my hair is too big?
I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and
gravy.
Honey, do these bonsai trees need watering?
Who's Richard Petty?
Give me the small bag
of pork rinds.
Deer heads detract from the decor.
Spitting is such a nasty habit.
I just couldn't find
a thing at Wal-Mart today!
Trim the fat off the steak.
Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
The
tires on that truck are too big.
I'll have the arugula and ridicchio salad.
Unsweetened tea tastes better .
Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
My fiance, Paula
Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
Little Debbie snack cakes
have too many fat grams.
Checkmate.
She's too old to be wearing a bikini.
Does the salad bar have
bean sprouts?
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer!
Elvis Who?
