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These are small downloadable games and programs that are fun and generally weird. Most of these are for Windows systems, but if you are using a Mac go ahead and try it, if it breaks something you will have an excuse to turn it in for a better computer. They are all freeware, or usable and complete shareware. Also many of these are Japanese in origin, so don't be surprised if the menus are not english but they are easy enough to figure out. These things serve absolutely no purpose except to occasionally do strange things to your system, but they take up almost no space and add a little spice to your life. Go ahead and try one out, then keep coming back for more.
Games
All of these games are either very compact or can be played at partial screen so as not to obstruct any other work you might be pretending to do.
Condom: An adult game where you take the role of the penis and "shoot" attacking entities, its wildly explicit. 1.4 MB Puff: A simple game where you must shoot Cocoa Puffs into Sonny's mouth, or a basket. 1MB Bubble: A side by side columns game, reduce the colored bubbles...its in japanese but easy to understand. 553k Sushi: This is like those Whack games, except you have to grab at sushi with chopsticks. 170K XTetris: This is my absolute favorite, a tetris spin off with people as the pieces, they must be placed in sexual positions to be removed from the board, mature adults only and much worth the space. 1.8MB Whack-A-Penis: Just like the classic game whack-a-mole, but with anatomy. Fire95: A little game where you must rescue people falling from a burning building. 272k KillBees: As a can of pesticide it is your duty to kill the bees. 130.4k
Virtual Pets
These are some of the weirdest little tamagotchi type virtual pet simulators available. Some of them are crudely done but all are weird enough and small enough to try, if only for a quick laugh. Alienz: A very cute and small little alien pet that you must tend to and play with, created by a young kid with great skill. 425K Cypet: A well done yet simplistic happy face pet. 483K Harold-A-Pet: Crudely drawn yet wildly funny story line and action with this pet, almost like a choose your own adventure friend. A well worth it 2.62mb uncompressed. Moof: A fluffy little guy to play with, no training involved. 437K Tamarochi: Its a virtual rock, you can feed it and play with it and well watch it be a rock, smart and fun program. 406K
South Park Oddities
This section includes games and other gadgets from the oddity that is South Park. Huntin and Killin: Join Ned and Jimbo in two games that feature maiming and blood, kill those cute pesky animals. 729K SPSol: Classic solitaire with a South Park theme. 113K SPTetris: More like inverted arkanoid, use the shift key to shoot the matching heads. 720.4K Cheesy: Catch flying Cheesy Poofs with Cartman. 688K
Window Toys
These applications enhance the uppermost window at any time, usually at timed intervals but some are constant or at random.
Hitsu: It counts sheep jumping over a fence, over and over and over... baaah 19.K Hanami: A branch with flowers that allows petals to float down your screen, color and wind speed fully controllable. 323K Moles: A tiny mole pops up everywhere and leaves a pile of mole dirt wherever it goes, very weird. 24.1k WindUp Bird: An adorable birdie that you wind up with your mouse and let walk across the screen, just like those old toys. 242.1k Bugs: Leaves many different bugs around the screen that pop up and disolve at random. 4.7k REI: A window sitter from the anime Neon Genesis Evangelion, her outfits are changeable as she blinks and works. 35.4k Raspberry: A lizard pops out of the middle of your top window and blows you a jolly raspberry. Kilroy: A little face that hangs over the top and sides of your top application.
Miscellaneous Doodads
These are just fun applications with no real purpose but to entertain.
BoxPro: A little application to change your comnputers window mseeages to whtever filthy or funny phrase you desire. 259.9K Odometer: A useless but great little toy, tells you how far your mouse has travelled, it works cumulatively, and you can select the measurement. 548.7K ChalkBoard: A little chalk board to scribble on with multiple colors. 11.5k Elvis Tel: A random sound generator with Elvis making comments about your desktop. 193.6k The Love Calculator: A program which allows you to enter any two names and see the probability of them having a relationship. Click hereThe Love Calculator to use the online version and see more information about it.
Some examples I received, remember these can very from system from to system: Laverne and Shirley 95%, Ginger and Gilligan 83%, Bert and Ernie 39% and Ken Starr and Bill Clinton 69%-and I couldnt make that one up. Carz: A racing strip on the side of your screen, you can control the rate of the cars that go by.
Seasonal Fun!
These games and toys are all for the changing seasons or holidays, add some festivity to your everyday computer lifestyle.
Tabo: A cute iceskating pig who skates and twirls clumsily across the desktop. 33.4k Xmas Lights: A little string of red lights that hangs around your screen. 29.2k Trick or Treat: Cute trick or treaters that interact with you. XMAS Fred: A holiday verion of regular Fred, he wears a santa suit and has presents, a tree, sings songs, and more. Winsnow: An adorable program that adds light snow to your desktop with snowmen, trees and reindeer scattered about.
Mouse Chasers
Neko95: A cute little kitty cat that chases your mouse. NekoSkins: A set to give Neko a new look, aliens, animals and more. 262.2K 7up Spot: The spot dances and chases amd follows your mouse around the screen. 53.7k Maggie: Maggie from the Simpsons crawls after your mouse, sucks her pacifier and naps if you get idle. 34.9k EYES32: A monster, larger and more detail than shown, whose eyes follow whatever direction your mouse goes.
Themes and Screensavers
These are some of the wildest, oddest screensavers and desktop themes out there. They mostly come with set-up instructions, as each one is different. Most of them are highly distatesful and very warped, so use proper discression, as always.
Brocolli: Its a desktop theme about brocolli, uh huh, wow. 200.2K Cows: A screensaver with cows doing funky things, adjustable plus sounds. 95.2K CheezeWhiz: An entire theme devoted to artificial bovine secretions in a jar. 760.5K Mower: A lawnmower screensaver which runs over moles and small animals as it runs across the screen. Sheep: Cute little sheep jump around in this screensaver, until they meet a hilarious demise...mmmm sheepcorn. 400.7K
Icons and Animated Cursors
These are icons and cursors to enhance the oddity of your workstation. To use the cursors go to mouse in the control panel and select pointers, from there find the file they are in and you are all set. The icons will install themselves or can be changed through display in the control panel. These work for Macs but that phase of my life is over and done so you will have to figure it out for yourself if you can. Many of these are sexual in nature, please use discression. It is recomended that most of these be used as wait cursors due to their size or shape, but they can be used any way you desire.
Toilet: A recylce/trash bin replacement, self explanatory. 91.5K Bouncy: a silver womans chest with large bouncing breasts. Cows: A set of spinning cows with bodily emisions. They pee and poop. Sex: A couple having sex. Happy Penis: A set of several different penis cursors, static and animated. Bunnies: Two little bunies making whoopee. Sexy: A woman wiggles her butt at you. South Park: A huge set of South Park cursors including many deaths of kenny. Shocking Finger: This is a finger flipping you the bird, with an extra oddity.
Desktop Companions
These little critters are small programs that place a little friend on your desktop. They all have their own "personalities" and actions, they are all different. Some of them interact with each other but most of them will just act as if the others do not exist. If you have your own little character, email me to have it available here. Some of them are more complex than others, some have sound, and just about all of them are more interesting than the image shown. They are all tested on Windows95 but they should work fine on other systems. Enjoy your new little cyber adoptions.
Crash Bandicoot: The character from the Sega game, its wild. 968.2K Dipsy: Its the green Teletubby, he dances and talks, eh oh!!
Deathwish Dog: A wild but cute dog that tumbles around, and you can personalize him. 296K Kamikaze Kat: Like the dog above, this cat is sweeter, yet just as wild. 277K Snowboard Girl: A sassy snowboard chick, also customizable. 232K Snowboard Guy: Klutzy snowboarder dude, watch out! 228K
Bunbun: An adorable little grey and white, comes with quite an amusing history. 246K Har-Runz: A trippy little cool dude, he dances and plays ball. 281.5K Doraemon: A cute creature you control yourself, tell it how to act and what size to be. 1.3mb Kawazu: A bouncy frog, he hops if you water his head. Really. 204.3K
Bad Badtz: A version of that cute penguin badtz moru with an attitude. 282k Club Chick: A sassy club chick with some little outfits that wanders the screen. 818.7k Hello Kitty: The classic little character plays quietly, so sweet and cute. 34.9k
Annoying Orange: A cute little orange that flies around your screen making weird sounds and causing a general disturbance. ESheep: A little sheep that eats, pees, sleeps, and does tricks on the bottom of your screen, an Internet classic. Fred: Well this is your typical man, he drinks beer and goes potty while reading the paper, but hes friendly, he just wanders around your screen looking for affection. Like most men, setting him up can be difficult but once you restart your system everything will be just fine. Angel: A sweet little angel, she flies around, prays, and waves her arms.
Hunter: A German Shepard who runs around, sleeps and barks. Old Pa: A wise, esoteric, peaceful old man who meditates and studies. Dami: A tiny little frisky dog.
LKing: A mean looking guy with a meaner laugh and a love for his pipe and gun. Captain: Can we all say cocky hostility. Perfect: An officer of who knows what, this guy just loves to show off.