Title: I Told You SO
Author: Istannor 
Series : TOS
Part: 1/1
Rating NC I7 
Code: K/S implied,lang.
Synopsis: A response to a challenge to you the phrase:
"Don't give me any of that bonding crap."

Disclaimer: These are the characters of paramount and
viacom, they own them I only check 'em out from the library.
I promise to bring 'em back.



I Told You So


"Don’t give me any of that bonding crap."  McCoy 
hollered. "This wasn’t about you bonding to T’Pring. Who, 
by the way, you didn’t know well enough, despite your 
vaunted Vulcan skills, to realize she was screwing around 
on you. Sounds like you were no better at that than I was, 
with my poor, dull, non-telepathic, human brain.." McCoy 
kept battering at the Vulcan. This was sink or swim night. 
"This was about you trusting Jim with the full truth. You 
have no excuse for what you did to him. Dammit, Spock, you 
never even told him you were engaged to be married. You 
know how important trust is to that man. He trusted you, 
and your stupid Vulcan pride almost killed him. No, scratch 
that. It did kill him, didn’t it? What the hell do you 
expect? He is not gonna just run up to you and say: "Its 
okay, friend. I don’t mind you killing me in a blind, sex-
crazed, rage. Especially, after I risked my entire career, 
and my life, for your hide."  Sarcasm flowed from McCoy's 
lips and left a trail of green blood behind on Spock's 
soul.

McCoy prepared to duck. He knew, even a Vulcan could 
be pushed too far. In truth, Kirk had seemed to do just 
that, at first. He had been laughing when he had left from 
the sickbay with the Vulcan in tow. But, he began his 
withdrawal soon after. Once he knew Spock was past Pon Far 
and the Plak Tow, Kirk withdrew behind barriers as 
formidable as any Vulcan’s. Now, the whole ship had become 
affected by his eerie silence. In McCoy’s mind, Spock was 
wholly to blame.

"You will cease your prattling, Doctor." Spock’s voice 
was icy cold. "You have no concept of what you are saying. 
"The Vulcan’s eyes were as close to rage as McCoy had ever 
seen them. But, frankly he didn’t give a good hot damn. 
Spock’s secrets had become a liability. He would protect 
Kirk, even against the Vulcan.

"Kiss my Georgia butt. If I hadn’t brought my medical 
kit with me, you would be in the brig now, and your 
Captain, and best, and probably only friend, would be dead. 
D.E.A.D."  He spelled it out for emphasis. "So, you better 
take a good long look at your self . He did not deserve 
what you did to him. He has never handicapped you like you 
do to him, all the time. I am tired of it." McCoy was 
fuming and hollering. He couldn’t ever remember being this 
mad before, not since his ex-wife…never mind. 

Spock continued to look at him as if he had venereal 
warts on his face. "Listen to me, you overgrown excuse for 
a blind elf, you are going to kill him permanently one day, 
with your half truths and your Vulcan propriety. Then, what 
will you have?" He folded his arms angrily across his chest 
and waited for a reply. The door was locked on his voice 
command. Spock had nowhere to go. That last bit struck home 
and the Vulcan visibly crumpled in front of him and sat 
down into the seat behind him. McCoy continued to wait him 
out. This was one time, he could not afford to lose.

"I would never intentionally hurt the Captain." The 
Vulcan’s voice was a faint whisper. McCoy waited. That was 
not enough. Spock sighed. "Vulcan propriety is rather 
constricting. We do not know how to discuss these issues. 
There is no precedent. We have never needed to do so 
before. My mother was the first to witness these truths. 
Captain Kirk is only the second non-Vulcan to participate 
in a ceremony of this type."  Even now, Spock could not 
call it by name. His face became a mask. "I know he can 
never forgive me for what I have done to him."

"Why  the hell should he? What guarantee does he have 
that you won’t do it again?" McCoy got up and poured 
himself a stiff drink. He handed one to the Vulcan, who 
surprisingly took it and downed it in one gulp. " Knowing 
you, you didn’t even apologize, and you tried to act as if 
nothing ever happened. You probably never gave him any more 
information than he already knows, from painful experience 
I will add, on Pon Farr and Vulcan rituals. Have you 
thought he might want to know why T’Pau suckered him down 
there? Or, is that too much to ask?"  His probe was met 
with a visible cringe from the Vulcan. That meant that is 
exactly what had occurred.

"Spock, if he loses the Enterprise, he loses his life. 
This is all he has ever wanted and you put him in the 
position of having to risk it, by not telling him what he 
needed to know, and not allowing him to tell what little he 
had learned. Then, you took him down there without letting 
him know what the possibilities were, or who the players 
were. Damn man, what were you thinking, or were you.? He 
has met with emperors, kings, queens and presidents. What 
possessed you to keep him in the dark about T’Pau being 
your grandmother?  What is your evaluation of your 
performance, Science Officer? If you had gotten a briefing 
like that from a member of your staff, what would you say?" 
McCoy had calmed down. He knew he had the Vulcan’s 
attention.

"The individual would be severely reprimanded," Spock 
quietly responded.

"Consider yourself reprimanded, severely." McCoy sat 
down with a plop. "Jesus H. Christ, Spock. You have the 
best man I have ever met, as your best friend, and you keep 
screwing up. Go to him. Tell him you are sorry, and that 
you will not ever keep secrets such as this from him again. 
He is an idiot when it comes to you, so he will believe you 
and accept your apologies. By tomorrow, everything will be 
back to normal. Shoot, he'll probably apologize to you for 
being upset about you killing him."  He couldn’t miss the 
Vulcan’s grimace at his purposeful choice of words. Spock 
needed to understand how unusual this forgiveness would be. 
McCoy wasn’t sure he, himself, could do it, but he knew 
Kirk would. McCoy knew he had won. He reached over and 
grabbed his drink. "Door, unlock now. Get out of here, 
Spock. I need my rest." He watched the Vulcan go, and 
sipped his drink slowly.

Spock stood outside of his Captain’s quarters. He 
gathered his courage and pushed the buzzer. "Come." He 
entered to find Kirk at his desk, finishing off his 
reports. The human's guarded eyes looked at him 
quizzically. Prior to their trip to Vulcan, they had been 
open and welcoming. "Yes, Mr. Spock?"

"Captain, I have come to formally apologize for my 
duplicity regarding the recent events on Vulcan. You were a 
victim of my poor briefing. I should have been more 
forthcoming with you. I did you a grave disservice. As a 
result, you might have died." He felt an obstruction 
forming in his chest. He pushed it away, with all the 
remaining discipline at his disposal.  "I know I do not 
deserve your trust at this time, but I seek to re-establish 
what we had." 

Kirk sat back thoughtfully in his chair. He rose and 
slowly walked over to the Vulcan and stood in front of him. 
Kirk’s eyes were still shuttered, but they at least were 
looking at him. They had not for several days. He turned 
his head sideways and a half-smile spread across it slowly. 
Spock could still see the line across Kirk’s throat where 
he had choked him with Vulcan strength. Only Spock’s 
weakness from the Plak Tow, had saved the human from a 
broken neck. "I suppose you have no idea how hard it is to 
accept that your second in command not only beat your butt, 
but killed you, and didn’t trust you enough to tell you why 
you were dying. The human male ego is a fragile thing. A 
guy could lose it over something like that." Kirk’s smile 
brightened and Spock felt bathed in a glow which touched 
his very soul. "Fortunately for you, I have more than 
enough ego to go around. Apologies accepted. How about 
dinner and then a game of chess in the rec room?"

"That is all you want to say?"  Spock choked out. He 
had expected pain and condemnation. At least as bad as what 
Sarek, he, who was his father, would do.

Kirk turned toward him and regarded him with open 
affection. "You are not, as you are so fond of saying, my 
friend, human. To expect you to conduct yourself as one 
would be…illogical. I can’t say I would not prefer more 
openness from you, but I will not invade your privacy. I 
will accept whatever you are able to give, Spock. I wasn’t 
backing off from you as much as I was from me. I hate to 
lose. You beat me. Actually, you kicked my ass. I needed a 
little space to accept that. I always knew you could, but 
to have it demonstrated so graphically was disconcerting, 
at the least. Before I was safe to be around, I had to deal 
with the part of me that wanted to make you suffer.  I'm 
sorry I spaced out on everyone, but I’m back, and I’m 
hungry." 

The smile made the Vulcan soar in response. Spock's 
emotions were still labile after his ordeal, but this had 
nothing to do with the sands of Vulcan. This was his 
friend, his friend who despite dying at his hands, forgave 
him. Spock felt his heart give way. There was nothing he 
would not do for this man now. But then, when had that not 
been true. He heard himself answer in the affirmative and 
followed his captain to dinner.  

McCoy came in to join them later. For once, the secret 
look was between a different pair, Spock and McCoy. Only 
Vulcan ears were able to hear the faint sound of: "I told 
you so," that came from the physician’s lips. Spock 
realized, he did not even mind the smirk the Doctor wore 
for the rest of the evening. How could he? The doctor had 
been correct. McCoy’s advice had been sound. Kirk, as 
predicted, had even apologized for being upset at being 
killed. Perhaps, the Doctor was not a completely irrational 
being after all.

   				THE END

Istannor : I Told You So     -1-
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