This is response to the challenge story by Jungle Kitty.
Also, I will try to respond in the same story to the
challenge by Nesabj.  Look for chocolate, blood, ghosts, and
an unexplained bit from one of the movies. And there was
some challenge about a replicator, way back. So, that's in
here too.

Title: Choices
Author: Istannor
Series: TOS
Part: 1/1
Rating: [PG]
Codes: 
Summary: It is a challenge response.This story takes place
after Spock's resurrection, and during their third five year
voyage.

Disclaimer: These are the characters of Paramount and
Viacom, they own them, I only check 'em out from the
library. I promise to bring 'em back.

Feedback to Istannor@Aol.com

Choices


Saavik was 27. It was the anniversary of her birth. She was
scheduled to be in the Transporter room to leave for the
party her Enterprise extended family and her friends from
the Academy were hosting for her. She did not wish to go.
She did not feel in a celebratory mood. She felt similar to
the Saavik Spock had found many years ago on Hellguard.
Wild, raging, filled with hate and anger, memories of her
degradation and life before floated through her head. None
of the disciplines taught to her by Sarek, or Spock, seemed
to help lately. The Birthday made her remember her early
ones, and she felt obsessed by ghosts and a lust for the
blood of her Romulan jailors... and tormentors.

Saavik stared at the picture in Spock's cabin.  It was
aesthetically pleasing but certainly dwelt on a strange
subject matter.  Vulcans had long since left their belief in
God behind.  Yet, here in Spock's cabin was a picture of
man's expulsion from paradise. God reached down his hand. It
was... illogical.

The cabin door hissed as it opened behind her. She turned to
see her mentor. "Saavik-kam, be welcome."  Spock's baritone
was deeply reassuring to her and had been since he had first
found her among the Romulans.

"Spock-kam, I do not understand the meaning behind this
representation  on your wall.  Why would you have a picture
of man's expulsion from paradise?"

Spock crossed the room and stood silently beside her as he
contemplated the picture.  "It serves a purpose."

"What purpose could something of this nature serve for you?"

"It was a gift from Jim.  It was intended to remind us both
that paradise is a place we may visit, but never dwell in
for long."

"I have never believed in the human concept of paradise,"
Saavik replied.

"There are many things I never believed in prior to James
Kirk, Saavik-kam.  Life allows us many lessons and countless
opportunities to change our viewpoints.  I urge you to not
miss any of your opportunities."  He turned and smiled at
her gently in the Vulcan way.  "Adopting you was an
opportunity I never expected.  It has been mutually
beneficial to us both, but it would not have occurred
without the growth I experienced during my years here on the
Enterprise."

"Are you planning on leaving the Enterprise?"

Spock walked over to a shelf and began to pour them both a
glass of tea.  "I will stay for as long as Jim chooses to
remain in command of the ship.  When he is finally ready to
retire from the Enterprise, we will re-evaluate our future."

Saavik turned and walk slowly around the cabin. Occasionally
she stopped to run her hand over an object that caught her
interest.  Spock waited patiently for her to gather her
thoughts.

"I find that I do not wish you to ever leave the Enterprise.
Somehow it will signal the end of an era.  At the Academy,
the exploits of you and Uncle Jim have become the stuff of
legends.  I have humans actively pursuing me now to become
my friend. My time with David was enjoyable. He was
brilliant and comfortable to be with.  I have experienced
none of the isolation that you originally experienced while
you were at the Academy.  It is almost enough to rid me of
my memories of Romulus.  Almost, but not quite." She turned
to face Spock. "I still have not forgiven them, Uncle."

Spock nodded his head slowly up-and-down.  "I understand
your internal conflict, Saavik-kam.  It is often hard to rid
oneself of the ghosts that plague our thoughts.  You find it
difficult to forgive the Romulans for their brutality
towards you and those we found.  Jim finds it difficult to
forgive the Klingons for the death of his son, David.  It
makes no difference to him that David would have been
imprisoned for life when he returned to the Federation.
David Marcus used protomatter in the Genesis machine. The
penalty was inescapable. The only thing that counts to Jim
is that a Klingon killed his son.  He beat the man who
killed his son to death with his own hands but that did not
suffice.  You have escaped the Romulans, found a home on
Vulcan, and found acceptance in the Academy, but that does
not suffice.  There is no deed that is ever sufficient for
you to be made to forgive.  It is a decision that you must
make based on no evidence.  It is a leap of... faith.  Anger
and hate are all things that drive us out of paradise."

Saavik came to sit beside him.  "What do you say to Uncle
Jim to help him with his anger and hate?"

"There is nothing that I may say to help him.  I accept his
anger as well as his hate.  They are his to deal with.  He
is mine to deal with.  I accept all that he is and all that
he feels.  He knows he is wrong to feel these things and we
both know that one day he will give them up.  But not yet."

"What of me, Uncle?  They killed my mother and my father.It
did not matter to them that one of them was Romulan. They
raped me and all of the children that lived in that hell-
spawn.  They destroyed our innocence and took away our
childhood."

"All true.  Yet, here you are.  You prosper.  You live.  You
have a future and a family.  To give them control over your
future would be your decision.  To deny them control over
your future would be your decision." He leaned forward
slightly and held his hand out towards her, reminiscent of
the picture on the wall.  "Shall you enter into paradise,
Saavik, or reject it."

She turned towards the picture and stared. "Vulcans do not
believe in paradise," she whispered.

"Vulcans do not comprise a monolithic sameness.  This Vulcan
believes in paradise.  I have chosen it, Saavik and I will
dwell in it for as long as I may.  Your choices are your own
to make."

The door hissed behind them and James Kirk walked it.  "Are
you guys going to take all day?  Scotty, Uhura, Sulu,
Chekov, and Bones are in the transporter room waiting for
us.  It would be in bad taste for Saavik to be late for a
party in her honor."

Spock turned his face towards Kirk and smiled. He grinned
back. "I know, I'm so impatient." Kirk crossed over and gave
Saavik a quick hug. "Come on, Saavik, it's your birthday,
and I'm not going to let you miss it sitting in here talking
to Spock."

Saavik turned around to face her Uncle. She felt the tension
begin to drain from her body. It was difficult to hold on to
her thoughts against the onslaught of her Uncle Jim's
unrestrained excitement and happiness with her and for
her.She could feel his love for her through his touch.
She turned to Spock and nodded. She was beginning to
understand. His only response was a raised eyebrow.

Spock looked at his T'hy'la with open affection. Then his
eye caught the bandage on his hand. "What happened to your
hand, Jim?"

"I got bit by the replicator."

"Explain."

"I made a drink for McCoy and it got stuck in the
replicator. I reached in to pull it out and the damn thing
bit me. I got blood in his hot chocolate. The idiot drank it
anyway. He said he knew my blood was clean, because he was a
doctor dammit." Kirk shrugged. "No accounting for tastes.
Come on folks, the ship is leaving port, the wagon is
rolling,  the...,"

Spock rose. "I believe we understand the analogies, Jim." He
turned to his ward. "Saavik, are you ready to depart?"

Saavik tilted her head to the side and looked at Spock and
then at her Uncle Jim.  "No, I believe I have decided to
stay, Spock-kam.  However, I am now ready to go to my
birthday party."

She walked past them and out of the door.  Kirk stared after
her and then turned towards Spock.  "What was that all
about?"

"She has decided to choose paradise."

Kirk understood immediately. He turned to look at the
picture on the wall.

Spock walked over to him and gently touched Kirk's meld
points.  "As did I."

Kirk smiled.  "A wise choice, T'hy'la."  They turned and
left the room together.

As the door closed behind them, a chill descended over the
room. A part of the room became misty.  The mist slowly
solidified into the figure of David Marcus.  He reached his
hand out towards the door and smiled gently.  "So did I,
Father.  So did I. Forgive them so you can choose, too." The
figure walked over to the picture and disappeared into it.

The End

Note:Did you find them all?