Eek's Mr Bean page!

----> Do Bears? A duet with Kate Bush which starts out with a cheesy Vegas-style intro and turns into a song about a couple who have vastly different views of their relationship. It's found on the "Comic Relief Utterly Utterly Live Album." Here's a sample of the lyrics:

ATKINSON: I met her in the first lounge of a jumbo jet. It was love at first sight. Romeo and Juliet. BUSH: He looked pretty rich and I was down on my luck. So I charged him a fortune for a flying....

----> Fatal Beatings This skit has Atkinson (in his best superior, arrogant mode) as a Headmaster who must explain to a parent, Mr. Perkins, that his son died after he was beat for not returning a library book. How does he break the news? After telling the parent that his son hasn't been participating in school life lately he says "Frankly, if he wasn't dead I'd have him expelled."

-----> Tom, Dick, and Harry (or Thomas, Richard, and Harold) Atkinson here is in his vicar character, telling about the demise of Tom, Dick, and Harry, all of whom were varying combinations of blind, deaf, and dumb yet made a great team because together were in possession of "all God's senses." So how did they meet their death? As the vicar tells it, "Dick *saw* the combine harvester. Harry *heard* the combine harvester, yet neither could cry out. Tom, who *could've* cried out, never had the faintest idea what hit him."

-----> The News Performed on the HBO "Live From London" special, this skit has Atkinson telling the news in a straight voice but giving visuals supposedly to help the hearing impaired. To say "Hello" he makes a halo around his head. To signify America he mimes putting an enormous amount of food into his mouth. He gets the name Ronald Reagan across by pretending first to be a cowboy drawing his gun and then falling asleep. There's more but you get the picture. A great bit.

-----> Shakespeare Skit What happens when you try to edit the Bard? In this bit of whimsy Atkinson tries to explain to Shakespeare that his latest play, "Hamlet" is too long and that some of the speeches (i.e. the "To be or not to be" soliloquy) need to be cut. "Think of bums on wooden benches" he pleads. In the end a deal is cut -- the soliloquy is shortened but the two "cockney grave diggers" and the skull bit get to stay. This skit was performed at the second "Hysteria" benefit with Hugh Laurie as Shakespeare.

Phone operator: "Hello?" Mr. Bean: "Halllooo." 22kb

"Hello?" 7kb

With Teddy on the plane: "Help! Help! Help! Help! Help!" 56kb

To Irma Gobb, ouside Club Phut: "I'm sorry I'm late." 18kb

Mr. Bean's unique laughter 59kb

"Just popped out for lunch." 27kb

"This really is the most appalling mess." 28kb

Realizing there's no way he can pass the calculus exam: "Oh mommy!" 49kb

After dropping his keys down the sewer: "Oh no." 20kb

"And here's your party hat." 29kb

Hotel Clerk: "Would you like a pen, sir?" Mr. Bean: "Oh, thank you very much." 43kb

Mr. Bean asks a passer-by to take his picture in the park. 90k

When Irma Gobb wants some of Mr. Bean's popcorn: "No! These are mine." 35k

Mr. Bean stuck in a post box (listen for the clunk!) 8kHz 186kb

There's nothing like a quick sandwich. 38kb
This is a longer version of "No, absolutely" from the top of the page.

To the baby: "Stay there." 9kb

Mr. Bean orders dinner in a fancy restaurant. 91kb

Shows the goldfish to the baby: "Ta da!" 9kb

Outside the department store: "Ta da!" 34kb

"Thank you!" 20kb

"Ah! Thank you very much." 21kb

The Theme 8khz 196kb

"Doesn't time fly when you're enjoying yourself." 36kb

"Excuse me, I'm looking for my watch." 35kb

Thanks to Robert M. Jones for these sounds. You can go see his site at A click of this button!

Finale?

Well, there will be more bean realated stuff here soon! So keep coming back! Thanks for visiting, hope you liked it!

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