TIP OF THE WEEK
DON'T RENT THE INTERNET!
Pay NOTHING - and you'll NEVER have montly ISP payments
EMAIL me if you have questions:
When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man,
"Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat."
The man groaned but didn't budge.
.
The usher became more impatient."Sir, if you don't get up from there
I'm
going to have to call the manager."
The man just groaned.
The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment
he
returned with the manager.
Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the man, but with
no
success. Finally, they summoned the police.
The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy,
what's your name?"
"Sam," the man moaned.
"Where ya from, Sam?"
With pain in his voice Sam replied "the balcony."
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse?
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.
Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower.
You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say will be
misquoted, then used against you.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Despite the cost of living, have you noticed
how it remains so
popular?
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp"
to have an "s" in
it?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't
that why some
people appear bright until you hear them
speak?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Why are they called "buildings," when they're
already finished?
Shouldn't they be called "builds"?
Why do you ask someone without a watch what time it is?
Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
Why is the alphabet in that order?
Why do scientists call it research when looking
for something
new?
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?
Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?
Do married people live longer than single
people do, or does it
just SEEM longer?
If all those psychics know the winning lottery
numbers, why are
they all still working?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Isn't the best way to save face, to keep the lower part shut?
War doesn't determine who's right, just who's
left.
Read
my Dreambook!
Sign my Dreambook! |
TKC |
|