"You
want me to let you what? Are you crazy?"
Deanna
faced the other woman's incredulous stare head on. "You said it yourself,
Beverly. He's improved dramatically, but not enough. Don't you see? He can't
possibly concentrate on getting well as much as he should if he's always
preoccupied with the frustration of being stuck in Sickbay? He's agitated all
the time now, how god can that before him?"
"It's
not. But Deanna, what your suggesting is --"
"Beverly,
I'd never do anything to hurt him. Do you honestly think that I would even
suggest this if I thought it would be putting him at risk? I'm not going
anywhere, I'll be with him around the clock. You to;d us he's in no imminent
danger at the moment. If that's true, this shouldn't be a problem. The computer
can monitor him constantly, and you can be there in a matter of moments at the
first sign of trouble. He'll do better if he's able to relax." At the
doctor's still skeptical look, she added, "Do you have a better idea,
because this isn't working."
"IF
-- and it' a big if -- I were to let you try this, it's going to have a few
conditions. And mind you, this is only because we are running out of options if
we want him stable enough to do the transplant." Beverly squeezed her eyes
shut. She didn't want to agree to this. But replacing Will's failing heart with
a device similar to the Captain's was his best hope for a normal life. But at
the moment, his body was still to weak to undergo the procedure. And it would
have to be done soon if there was to be any real chance of success. Very soon.
"All right, but I want him back in here at even the hint of a change in
his condition. And I'll see him myself, twice a day."
Deanna
nodded. "Of course. Thank you so much. May I go tell him?"
The
doctor nodded. "No time like the present, I suppose. I'll get to work on
the arrangements."
Deanna
was half way out the door when the sound of the other woman calling her name
caused her to stop in her tracks. "Remember to take care of yourself
too," she reminded her quietly.
* * *
Will
looked up as Deanna entered. ~ Hi. What has you smiling like that. ~
Deanna
shrugged. "How'd you like to get out of here, Mister?"
He
stared at her as though she had suddenly acquired a second head.
"How?" he managed aloud.
She
grinned, a private smile of victory lighting her eyes. "I'm taking you
home. It'll be easier to rest there with me, than cooped up in here, don't you
think?"
Will
let the information sink in a moment. Part of him was thrilled. He needed to be
anywhere but here. Being stuck in sickbay like this was beginning to drive him
crazy. But there was more to it than all that. The possibilities of what this
mean for them, for her ran through his mind. How could he ask her to --
Deanna
sensed the turbulent shift in his emotions, and stepped closer to the bed.
"Hey...don't. Worry about tomorrow when it gets here, OK? One thing at a
time."
Will
shook his head in frustration, trying to make her understand.
"Deanna....you can't do this....you have your work and....you don't need
to be taking care of me."
She
never flinched. Instead, Deanna held up a silencing hand. Moving to sit on the
edge of the biobed, she held his eyes with her own. "Will...first of all,
I am perfectly capable of deciding what I need, as sweet as it is to have you
worrying about me, thank you. And all I need is to be with you right now. As
for the rest," She looked down at her hands, then back to him. "Will,
I resigned this morning." She place her hand over his lips as she had
earlier, stalling his protest before it began. "I've been planning this
for a while now. It didn't go exactly as I planned, but the result was the
same. What's done is done, and it's not what either of us needs to focus on
right now."
Will's
blue eye's held an objection, but he said nothing. At the moment there was
little he could do, and he was suddenly too tired to argue. When he didn't,
Deanna smiled. "Good. Now, lets get you back home before Bev changes her
mind." Even as she set about preparing to take him home, She knew this
conversation was not over.
Two
hours and several alterations to their quarters later, Will was finally settled
in. He was also exhausted. "You need to sleep," Deanna admonished
from her place at the edge of the bed. She sat down beside him, brushing the
hair back from his forehead. "What's wrong?"
His
eyes refused to meet with hers. "Everything. It's all...different now. For
me -- and for you. Nothing is...like it was supposed to be..."
Deanna
suppressed a sigh of frustration. "Will, listen to me. It's true, some
things will change. But that doesn't have to mean that things will change for
the worse. We have each other, and as far as I'm concerned that means that
things can only get better. I know it won't be easy, but I believe we can do
it. But if we are going to do that, you have to believe that too. And stop
acting like I'm making some
dramatic sacrifice. I *want* this...more than you may ever know."
"But
Dea, this is --"
Deanna
cut him off with a shake of her head. "Will, if I had gone down there,
what would you been doing right now? It wasn't a question that needed an
answer, and he knew it. He also knew what that answer would have been. Still,
he said nothing, squeezing the hand that rested in his own instead.
She
smiled slightly as she watched his eyes drift closed as he fought against it.
She tipped her head toward him. "If I stay with you, will you get some
sleep for me?" The motion of his hand beside him on the bed, and a glimmer
of a smile were the only she received before sleep claimed him.
Reaching
to the nightstand, she slipped the oxygenation unit from where it lay and
gently put it in place. Will wouldn't be thrilled when he woke up, but Deanna
was willing to take that chance if it meant even a little improvement in his
condition. That done, she slipped into the bed and settled herself into his
arms as best she could without waking him. In moments, she was asleep herself.
In
Sickbay, Beverly Crusher watched the readings that the computer was continually
feeding to her terminal. Will Riker's condition, while by no means truly
stable, was evening out somewhat. She shook her head in amazement. Whatever
effect Deanna had on him, it was certainly a helpful one. She just hoped that
Deanna remembered to help herself. Worrying about Will these past two months
had taken it's toll. She wasn't looking right to her friend and physician, and
Beverly decided that she would have Deanna submit to an exam as soon as
possible -- weather the younger woman liked it or not.
Two days later....
"Beverly,
would you please relax, I'm fine. It's Will were supposed to be worrying about,
remember?"
The
redhead shook her head and continued scanning, undaunted. "I have been,
Deanna. And if things continue as they have been, we should be able to do the
transplant within a week. Right now though, it is you I worry about. Look at
yourself, can you honestly say you feel that things are normal where you are
concerned?"
Deanna
sighed in defeat. "I'm just tired Beverly. Things will calm down after the
surgery." A beep from the scanner cut her off with a start. She glanced up
at Beverly, unsettled by the grin on her face.
"I
wouldn't be too sure of that, my dear."
"What?"
The doctor didn't seem to be sure of how to respond. She opened her mouth, then
closed it again. "For heaven sake Beverly, just tell me.
Leveling her blue-eyed gaze at Deanna, she shrugged. "OK here goes....you're pregnant."