Ok, here me put lots of my songs,
Maybe make .wav files to sing along.
But now they just plain text, no music,
Me think you hear them, then you get sick.

I sing story, sad and true,
I thrown out of pack in youth,
I want sing, tell music tale,
They say I not sing, I only wail,
Clan says I big dumb fool,
Troll no sing, troll only drool,
Kick me out and shut door,
I must wander near to far,
I know not what role I fill,
I outcast troll, I Retsilj.

This my day, I walk in wood,
I seek friends, friends good,
I meet man, he say 'Troll!'
He try hurt me, he a fool,
I kill him, I just defend me,
Then I eat him, he tasty.I Retsilj, troll bard,
For troll, this life hard,
I outcast from trolldom,
I want sing and guitar strum.

This what happen other day,
I walk from Haven far away,
I not know where I are,
All I know is very far,
Much I sing but no one hear,
Me think there no one near,
All alone I was there,
Tired and hungry and rain in air,
Then I wander all around,
Soon I find way back to town,
There a lesson I must know,
No walk far from home.

Caelum giant, big strong man,
He can kill with bare hands,
He tough too, take many blows,
Not need worry about foes,
He kill and slash and maim,
If he wants he cause much pain.

I have boring day today,
Not enough creatures to slay,
I wander round and round and round,
There no monsters to be found,
With Valenwood me wander more,
Gypsies rob us now we poor,
I think gypsies not nice,
We kill them, slice and dice.

Hungry and thirsty I come back to town,
Me hack and slash and kill all around,
Go to fountain and take a big drink,
Water taste funny, me now think,
Me lie down and sleep whole day,
Too tired to go for monster slay,
Me now not like fountain here,
From now on I just drink beer.

Me is happy in this land,
I hold guitar in my hand,
Here me learn how to play,
Me sing alot every day,
Music very good for me,
Me hope song make you happy.

Very much I like to sing,
Me sing about lots of things,
Haven town and Dragon road,
Dwarves with axe and ugly toad,
Me want sing for all of you,
And me play guitar too,
Hope all you like my song,
Even though it not too long.

Now me big orc in Aarinfel,
Play mandolin and try sing well,
But me scare people, run away,
So me put songs here, for to stay.

I Retsilj, orc bard.
For orc, this life hard.
Long time I wander
In lands out yonder,
Get to Khigatin
With my mandolin.
Now much I practice,
So less notes I miss.
With practice I should
both play and sing good.

Here I sit on other day
Sing a song and also play.
Nymith and Jirikial there,
They throw lots of icy stares.
They jump up and almost fight,
Punch and scratch and kick and bite,
But Cayti stop them just in time,
Calm them down and make things fine.

Kimbach scary, you watch out!
All his battles always rout.
He use warhammer on head,
Lot of people end up dead.
He fight when he feel like it,
Even when just a little bit.
So run far when you see him,
Or he kill you on a whim.
(Jaqliin sings) And if he doesn't get you,
(Jaqliin sings) His guards will do it in lieu.

This a song of love and badness,
How some people get in big mess,
But in song I change people's names,
If I don't then they have no shame.
Andeleve and Noqri at inn,
They sit and share love-happy grin.
Ultip there, and us four talk well,
Touver enter and now five dwell.
Noqri have ale, and Ultip too,
Andeleve drink cider, I eat stew.
Noqri get drunk, one too much ale,
And when that drunk it never fail
That someone go and do something
I put in song for me to sing.
Noqri find that Touver not drunk,
And so that test of love he flunk.
So to Ultip she then whisper,
Andeleve then talk with Touver.
Noqri give Ultip one big kiss,
Really big kiss right on his lips.
Andeleve jump up with wide eyes,
Grab sabre firmly as he rise,
But he just walk to door and leave,
Walk out with sword still in its sheath.
Not look at either as he go,
walk straight outside and stand in snow.
Noqri drink one more ale and leave,
Walk out to talk to Andeleve.
They get mad and again near fight,
Andeleve go from Noqri's sight.
But then third time they meet inside,
There Andeleve not able to hide.
But they make up and hold hands now,
Noqri not do that more she vow,
So they kiss and then both make up,
Then Avra come and kiss Ultup.
They all happy in each others' arms
also not mad cause no more harm.
Lots of kissing then in that room,
This happy ending come too soon.

On Lunisday in month of Darkness
Yvrena and Zabdiel now in bliss.
At church in Precipice they wed,
Not to part until they both dead.
Priest of Adera, Cayti give vows,
Married couple quite happy now.
Best times to them in coming days
They be happy in many ways.

Here I tell tale of my last trip,
I go see family far away,
So in my hand my staff I grip,

'Good bye,' to many folks I say,
'I go to warband for a while,
But I be back soon, any day.'

Not see family since I a child,
It been five years since I leave home,
So now I travel many miles

Walking, make me weary to bones,
I have to stop and rest a lot.
I not sure about travelstones.

But family leave, not in same spot
They were when I leave, then I fear
I not see them, it not good thought.

So I ask person if they near,
He say 'I tell you for a price,'
Then in his hand I put ten kyr.

He say 'they just over that rise,'
Now that way I start up to heights,
But I think my father not nice.

As child he always make me fight,
But I not want fight, I want sing,
But I going to see him that night.

Then I nervous, I worrying
That he still mad because I leave,
But then I see I in camp ring.

As I walk in, big sigh I heave,
But still smile when I see father.
He say 'Good to see you on this eve,

'But much too long you been wafter,
Now you fight with band at home. You
Still strong like andalwood rafter?'

'Ya,' I say, 'I still sing good too.
But I not fighter, I a bard.'
'Ok, you sing, but you must do

'Just one thing,' he said, then I jarred,
Not think he like me for music,
He say 'Sing about our First Guard,

'Tonight at fire, over at brick
Courtyard. We want welcome you back.'
I think of song until I sick,

Always right word to rhyme I lack,
And no good tune to sing along,
I not good bard, I still a hack.

So as bonfire was raging strong,
I stand up and all them sit still,
Sing and play for family this song:

'First Guard strong and brave in battle,
They good with club and shield and sword,
They run through field, attack and kill,

'In fight they not get tired or bored,
Always go and draw others' blood,
Many others they hack and gore,

'Hit them on head, crack skull with thud,
Or stab them with big pointy spear,
And hold them down to drown in mud.

'All you run far when they get near,
They tough killers, now all you know,
First Guard slay you and cause much fear.

'They all like song, weapons they show,
All run round fire, also cheer much,
Late into night, until fire burn low,

Drink so much ale that I need crutch.
But in morning I say 'I go now,'
So in my hand my staff I clutch,

And I start walking back to town.
But this time now my father speak
'I glad to see you come back down,

'But be better orc, not so meek,
You fight more, you should be real tough.'
'I not take advice I not seek,

'But,' I say, 'I make name and stuff,
I be good orc, I make you proud.'
He give slight nod and say 'Enough.'

Since then I less sad, I have found,
Not so bad to family or pack,
I now can sing and play more loud,

Which I do much on journey back,
I now happy, and feet less sore,
I sing band song, they cut me slack,

I just play while they go to war.
Now back to Khigatin I head,
While they put song in book of lore.

I much want sleep in my own bed,
Good to see family for a while,
But much more time and I see red.

So I walk back in happy style,
Still, very tired as I round bend,
But I see city, then I smile,

And that where I bring song to end.

Just other day in Marion's Inn,
Two men look for pie of raisin.
Quintarius get it, he in bliss,
But then from street walk Sanganis.
He try take pie with long quick arm,
But only catch flame, he get harmed.
But Kimbach walk in door just then,
Catch Quintarius, put him in pen.
Kimbach very brave man to take
Man that fire magic he can make.
I hear from Elbreth, Dverning too,
But I make song to sing to you.

Just other day me feel so bad
For me cause trouble that you had,
So me make song to cheer you up
And what makes better than to sup?
So this big song of rabbit stew,
Chicken pie and roast pheasant too,
Leek soup, potato and braised beef,
And corn on cob that stuck in teeth.
Fresh berries and chocolate orange,
Tankard of ale and rich porridge,
Smoked fishes, cheeses, scrambled eggs,
Onion, tomato, roast lambs legs.
Cole slaw and little bits of fruit,
And tuna casserole to boot,
Wild rice, green bean, and loaf of bread,
Mix green salad make you well fed.
And much wine, maybe Cabernet,
For dessert brandy and sorbet.
Me hope you like to hear this food,
Maybe it make you in good mood.