The Nazis Are Coming!
The Nazis Are Coming!
(A Parable)
Once upon a time there lived a bitter old man. His
name was Jebediah O'Hallahan. "Whiskey makes a man bitter."
he liked to say. So he drank and smoked cheap cigarettes until
the day he was visited by a dapper young gentleman named Adolf
Hitler.
"Would you like a cigarette?" old Jeb asked Hitler.
"No."
There was an awkward silence after that. Jeb stared at Hiter,
Hitler stared at Jeb. It would have gone on and on, but was
interrupted by Hitler's grandma. Hitler's grandma came screaming
out of nowhere, yelling at the top of her lungs.
"THE NAZIS ARE COMING! THE NAZIS ARE COMING!" she hollered.
She flailed around wildly while Jebediah and Hitler looked on.
The grandma fell to the ground in an epileptic fit. She flailed
some more until finally one of her arms was broken. She became quiet
then and stopped moving.
"Grandmas are like horses." Hitler said as he pulled out a shotgun. He
put the gun to the grandma's head and pulled the trigger. And
then he put the gun away.
Jebediah O'Hallahan didn't know what to say to this.
"Would you like some whiskey then?" he asked.
"Yes." answered Hitler. "Yes, I would like some whiskey."
"Whiskey makes a man bitter." Jeb said as he poured the cups.