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THE LORD'S PRAYER Our Father who art in heaven .... YES? Don't disturb me. I am praying. BUT YOU CALLED ME !! Called you ? I didn't call you. I am praying the Our Father who art in heaven. THERE ! YOU DID IT AGAIN ! Did what ? CALLED ME ! YOU SAID "OUR FATHER WHO ART IN HEAVEN". HERE I AM. WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND ? But I didn't mean anything by it. I was, you know, just saying my prayers for the day. I always say the Lord's prayer. It makes me feel good.... sort of like getting a job done. ALL RIGHT. GO ON. Hallowed be Thy Name.... HOLD IT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT ? By what ? BY HALLOWED BE THY NAME. I mean.. it means.. Good grief ! I donít know what it means. How should I know ? Itís just part of the prayer. By the way, what does it mean ? IT MEANS HONOURED, HOLY, WONDERFUL. Ah, that makes sense. I never thought about what hallowed meant beforeÖ Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth as it is in heavenÖ DO YOU REALLY MEAN THAT ? Of course ! Why not ? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT ? Do ? Nothing. I suppose I just think it would be rather good if you got control of everything down here as you have up there. HAVE I GOT CONTROL OVER YOU? Well, I do go to church. THAT ISNíT WHAT I ASKED YOU !! WHAT ABOUT THE HABIT OF LAZINESS YOU HAVE ? AND YOUR BAD TEMPER ? YOUíVE REALLY GOT A PROBLEM THERE, YOU KNOW. AND THEN, THEREíS THE WAY YOU SPEND YOUR MONEY ALL ON YOURSELF. AND WHAT ABOUT THE KIND OF BOOKS YOU READ ? Stop picking on me ! I am just as good as some of the rest of those hypocrites down at the church. EXCUSE ME. I THOUGHT YOU WERE PRAYING FOR MY WILL TO BE DONE. IF THAT IS TO HAPPEN, IT WILL HAVE TO START WITH THE ONES WHO ARE REALLY PRAYING FOR IT. LIKE YOU, FOR EXAMPLE. Oh, all right. I guess I do have some habits now that you mention them. I could probably name others. SO COULD I ! I havenít thought about it very much until now. But I would really like to cut out some of those things. I would to, you know, be really free. GOOD. NOW WEíRE GETTING SOMEWHERE. WEíLL WORK TOGETHER, YOU AND I. SOME VICTORIES CAN REALLY BE WON. I AM PROUD OF YOU. Look, Lord, I need to finish up here. This is taking a lot longer than it usually does. Give us this day our daily breadÖ. YOU NEED TO CUT OUT THE BREAD. YOUíRE OVERWEIGHT AS IT IS. Hey, wait a minute. What is this ? Criticise me, eh ? Here I was, doing my religious duty and all of a sudden, you break in and remind me of all my habits. PRAYING IS A DANGEROUS THING. YOU COULD WIND UP CHANGED, YOU KNOW. THATíS WHAT IíM TRYING TO GET ACROSS TO YOU. YOU CALLED ME AND HERE I AM. ITíS TOO LATE TO STOP NOW. KEEP ON PRAYING. IíM INTERESTED IN THE NEXT PART OF YOUR PRAYER. WELL, GO ON. Iím scared to. SCARED OF WHAT ? I know what youíll say. TRY ME AND SEE ? Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us. WHAT ABOUT BILL ? See ! I knew you would bring him up. Why, Lord? He told lies about me, cheated me of some money. He never paid back the debt that he owes me. Iíve sworn to get even with him. BUT YOUR PRAYER ? WHAT ABOUT YOUR PRAYER? I didnít mean it. WELL, AT LEAST, YOU ARE HONEST. BUT ITíS NOT MUCH FUN CARRYING THAT LOAD OF BITTERNESS AROUND INSIDE YOU, IS IT ? No, but Iíll feel better as soon as I get even with that fella. Boy, have I got some plans for old Bill. Heíll wish he never did me any harm. YOU WONíT FEEL ANY BETTER. YOUíLL FEEL WORSE. REVENGE ISNíT SWEET. THINK OF HOW UNHAPPY YOU ALREADY ARE. BUT I CAN CHANGE ALL THAT. You can? How ? FORGIVE BILL. THEN, IíLL FORGIVE YOU. THEN THE HATE AND SIN WILL BE BILLíS PROBLEM AND NOT YOURS. YOU MAY LOSE THE MONEY BUT YOU WILL HAVE SETTLED YOUR HEART. But Lord, I canít forgive Bill. THEN I CANíT FORGIVE YOU. Oh.. youíre right. You always are. And more than I want revenge on Bill, I want to be right with you. All right, all right, I forgive him. Help him to find the right road in life, Lord. Heís bound to be awfully miserable, now that I think about it. Anybody who goes around doing the things he does to others has to be mixed up inside. Someway, somehow, show him the right way. THERE, NOW, WONDERFUL. HOW DO YOU FEEL ? Hmm.. Well, not bad. Not bad at all. In fact, I feel quite tremendous. You know, I donít think Iíll have to go to bed tense for tonight for the first time since I can remember. Maybe I wonít be so tired from now on because Iím not getting enough rest. YOUíRE NOT THROUGH WITH YOUR PRAYERS. GO ON. Oh.. all right.. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evilÖ. GOOD, GOOD. IíLL DO JUST THAT. JUST DONíT PUT YOURSELF IN A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN BE TEMPTED. What do you mean by that ? STOP HANGING AROUND THE MAGAZINE STAND WHERE PLAYBOY IS SOLD. CHANGE SOME OF YOUR FRIENDSHIPS. SOME OF YOUR SO-CALLED FRIENDS ARE BEGINNING TO GET YOU. THEYíLL HAVE YOU COMPLETELY INVOLVED IN WRONG THINGS BEFORE LONG. DONíT BE FOOLED. THEY ADVERTISE THAT THEYíRE HAVING FUN, BUT FOR YOU, IT WOULD BE RUIN. DONíT USE ME FOR AN ESCAPE HATCH. I donít understand you. YES, YOU DO. YOUíVE DONE IT A LOT OF TIMES. YOU GET CAUGHT IN A BAD SITUATION, YOU GET INTO TROUBLE, AND THEN COME RUNNING TO ME: "LORD, HELP ME OUT OF THIS MESS AND I PROMISE IíLL NEVER DO IT AGAIN." YOU REMEMBER SOME OF THOSE BARGAINS YOU TRIED TO MAKE WITH ME ? Yes, and Iím ashamed, Lord. I really am. WHICH BARGAINS ARE YOU REMEMBERING ? Well, when the woman next door saw me coming out of the video games centre. I remember telling you : "O God, donít let her tell my mother where Iíve been. I promise Iíll be in church every Sunday." SHE DIDNíT TELL YOUR MOTHER, BUT YOU DIDNíT KEEP YOUR PROMISE, DID YOU ? Iím sorry, Lord. I really am. Up till now. I thought that just praying was enough. I didnít expect you to answer like this. GO AHEAD AND FINISH YOUR PRAYER. For thine is the Kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. DO YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BRING ME GLORY ? WHAT WOULD REALLY MAKE ME HAPPY? No, but Iíd like to know. I want now to please you. Now I can see how good it would be to be a real follower of you. YOU JUST ANSWERED THE QUESTION. I did? YES. THE THING THAT WOULD BRING ME GLORY IS TO HAVE PEOPLE LIKE YOU TRULY LOVE AND FOLLOW ME. AND I SEE THAT HAPPENING BETWEEN US. NOW THAT SOME OF THESE OLD SINS ARE EXPOSED AND OUT OF THE WAY, WELL, THEREíS NO TELLING WHAT WE CAN DO TOGETHER. Lord, letís see what you can make of me, okay? YES. LETíS SEEÖ..

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