(SOAP bridge) (Mike(with several badgages) is repairing Crow and Tom) TOM: Who knew that box of Hamdingers had the Transmetal IIs and Cyber Beasts? CROW: It should have been our ticket home… ECHOWARRIOR: The only Stasis pods around here are taken..ACL, JP Croft, Barney…and my brother. TOM: You have a brother..AHHHHH ANOTHER TRANSFORMERS FANBOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the bridge breaks into chaos at the thought of another Transformers fanboy) OSCAR:Anyway the home of the weirdos is calling*hits the MADS button* (sci-fi Zone) VOICE: Greetings…Time for the final part of the Transformers fic..enjoy. (SOAP) Tom; Who is that person? ECHOWARRIOR: We have no idea..AND WE TRANSFORMERS SIGN! > Scene 14 MIKE: ... thousand. TOM: Feels like it. > ======== > Hot Rod: That done it. Well what do you think? CROW: I think peuce does NOT go with red. MIKE: They're right! Melanie Griffith can't act! > Kup: Of all the circuit glitched diode blowing dim wittery, you left > a piece out. TOM: The schnookery? MIKE: The reconst? CROW: The Puke-O-Tron? > Hot Rod: No way, you're just a little stiff. CROW: Heeeey... MIKE: Crow... > Kup: Anyway, all things considered you did an amazing job lad. Amazing. > > Hot Rod: Really? OSCAR(Kup): For an idiot. > Kup: Yeah, you even got rid of a nasty bar on my rotator. TOM: Proof that robots can get icky STDs. MIKE: [friendly announcer] Remember, practice safe oil changes! > Now lets > find the Dinobots and get off this twisted planet. CROW: [surfer] It's totally twisted, dude! > Hot Rod and Kup transform drive a bit and come across some > Sharkticons. > > Kup: Don't act hostile, I'll use the universal greeting. MIKE: [Kup] It's the Turban Wedgie, but since they don't wear underwear, I'll have to improvise. > Hot Rod: Universal greeting? MARISSA: Isn't it the middle finger? ECHOWARRIOR: That's the universal insult or they're Stone Cold Steve Austin fans. TOM: Either or... > Kup: Watch, I'll have them eating out of my hand. CROW: What if your hands are dirty? > Ba weep granna weep > ninny bang. TOM: Mmmm...bop... mmmmm...bop! MIKE: ACK!! > Hot Rod: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang? TOM: [singing] The Chattanooga Choo-choooooo!! CROW: Very nice. TOM: Thank you. > Sharkticons: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. > > Kup: See, the universal greeting works everytime. Now, without making > any sudden moves, offer them an energon goody. MIKE: Yes, because they never learned not to accept candy from strangers. CROW: Kids! Play in traffic! Echowarrior: And unknown to Kup and Hot Rod, Sharkicons translate everything into " I have/am food" > Hot Rod: This is getting expensive. > Kup: Don't worry, they'll reciprocate. ECHOWARRIOR: Then why is it a goodie if it makes you vomit? TOM: That's good if you're Sailor Moon. MIKE: Ouch! > Hot Rod: I thought they were supposed to reciprocate? No more. > Kup: Empty. CROW: Ummm... excuse me... were we supposed to have some required readings for this film? TOM: This transcript takes the bold step of not including the audience... > Kup and Hot Rod are taken prisoner and led off, eventually > coming to a corridor, they are followed by Wheelie, up until > the corridor. MIKE: So you said. > Kup: This reminds me of the Nitith slave mines on Galganath 7. CROW: Oh, like the Flan custard quarry on Didjeridoo 15. OSCAR [Kup]: one of the Actionmasters comes from there.... > Hot Rod: Everyplace reminds you of someplace else. TOM: Things are more like they used to be than they are now. > Kup: Experience lad, you should learn to appreciate it. MARISSA [Kup]: Or pray to Primus you get the Matrix.. like that will happen. > Hot Rod: Lot of good it's done us so far. > Kup: Hey, what's going on over there? MIKE: [Hot Rod] There's a party over there, and don't call me Hey. > Inquisitor: Has the imperial magistrate reached a verdict? > Judge: I have. TOM: [Judge] But I'm not telling. Nyah. > Inquisitor: Guilty or innocent? > Judge: Innocent. > Inquisitor: Feed him to the Sharkticons. ECHOWARRIOR: I wish that happened at the O.J. trial... CROW: Quota... > Victim: Aaaaaaaa....... MIKE: [victim] Aaaaa... I see now... it is funny when you think about it! > Judge: Hahahahahaha*change faces*hahahahahahaha > *change faces*hahahahahaha*change faces*hahahahahahaha. TOM: Oh, no!! He's turned into Screw Loose!! They're doomed now! CROW: Either him or Leona Helmsley. > Hot Rod: We've got to get a new travel agent. TOM: [Hot Rod] I told you we shouldn't have used Microsoft Expedia! > Sharkticons escorting Kup and Hot Rod: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. MIKE: Oooki Oooki walli willa eeko wap-tiiiing! > Hot Rod: What is this place? OSCAR: The aftermath of a rock concert. CROW: The porto-potties at the Grateful Dead concert. TOM: Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch. MARISSA: My room after a party. > Kranix: The world of the savage Sharkticons and their cruel masters > the Quintessons. I am Kranix, my planet was destroyed by > Unicron. > > Hot Rod: Unicron? Who's Unicron? OSCAR(Kranix): That big orange moons sized robot that eats planets... MIKE: Hey!! I remember her! She was my bus aide in 5th grade! > Kranix: A planet, that devours everything in it's path. > > Kup: So that's the monster's name. CROW: [Kup] Why would someone name their kid "A planet, that devours everything in it's path"? It's not very catchy. > Sharkticons come in and take Kranix away. TOM: [singing] They're coming to take him away, hahaa! > Kranix: No please, I'm the last *gagged by Sharkticons* no, no! MIKE: [Judge] Make him watch... "The Avengers!" CROW: [Kranix] NOOOOOO!! HAVE MERCY ON ME!! PLEASE, NO!!! > Hot Rod: Let him go! *runs into electrified bars* Aaaa! > > Inquisitor: Soon you to shall receive your sentence. Has the imperial > Magistrate reached a verdict? MARISSA [Kranix]: One question: What's so different about being found guilty instead of innocent? TOM: The food's better if you're innocent. > Judge: I have. > Inquisitor: Guilty or innocent? > Kranix: Spare me this mockery of justice. MIKE: Whitewater? CROW: Heh... > Inquisitor: I repeat, guilty or innocent? > Judge: Innocent. > Kranix: Aaaaaaa..... TOM: [Kranix] It *is* ironic when you think about it. Yes, I see! > Kup: Not the end I'd wish for lad. MIKE: [Kup] When I go out, I want to go out with a six pack and a dame in my lap! > Scene 15 > ======== > Swoop: Me Swoop no see nothing. CROW: Maybe he should see an English textbook. > Grimlock: Me Grimlock positive Kup and Hot Rod close. TOM: Me Grimlock no use prepositions correctly. ECHOWARRIOR(Grimlock): Hey their targetmasters are over there! > Slag: Me Slag say you full of baridium baloney. > Grimlock: Me Grimlock say you full of sesiame salami. MIKE: Me Mike say you both full of bovine excrement. > Slag: Babily and baloney. CROW: Oh de lolly! TOM: [singing] And what a good time was had by all... > Wheelie: Friend find, look behind. MIKE: What about my behind? > Grimlock: Who say that? CROW: [Madonna] Whoo's that girl? OSCAR [Wheelie]: Me ... the most annoying transformer ever... TOM: What about Echowarrior? ECHOWARRIOR: he's even worse than me. *grins* > Wheelie: Friend find, look behind. You go wrong way, you fool I say. TOM: Hey!! Confucious is a robot now! > Grimlock: Me Grimlock fool? > Wheelie: Picture you got, not fool you not. MIKE: Yoda rip off do you? Originality must you have. > Grimlock: Me Grimlock no like you *smacks Wheelie who then fires a shot > at Grimlock's nose* Ow! Why boy hit my nose? CROW: Gee... maybe because you HIT him? Geeez! TOM: We never said Grimlock was smart... MARISSA: Grimlock kick Wheelie's @$$! > Wheelie: Wheelie say, find friend today. > Grimlock: Me Grimlock say, we on our way. CROW: Confucious say, crib take many nails to build, one screw to fill. [MIKE & TOM laugh] > Scene 16 > ======== > Galvatron: Unicron, why did you torture me? TOM: [Unicron] Well, it's my job. Come on, work with me here! > Unicron: You have failed. > Galvatron: No Unicron, Ultra Magnus is dead, and the Matrix destroyed. MIKE: [Galvatron] I even put sugar in their gas tanks and clipped their jigsaw puzzle pieces! MARISSA(Hooligan) HEY I WANTED TO DO THAT! > Unicron: The Matrix has not been destroyed, and Ultra Magnus lives, on > the planet of Junk, stalk him, tear him apart and destroy the > Matrix. ECHOWARRIOR [Galvatron]: Well if you know everything why do you need me? CROW: Just a cliché. TOM: Yeah, all these bad guys are so lazy... > Scene 17 > ======== CROW: [Count] 17! 17 crappy scenes! Ah, ah, ah! > Perceptor: Make sure the fittings are securely welded. > > Blurr: AbsolutlyPositivelyDefinitly,IWouldn'tHaveItAnyOtherWay,AnyOther > WayAtAll. OSCAR: Blurr cut down on the enerjolt. MIKE: Yeah, he seems much more calm now. > Daniel: Woah, this exo-suit's fantastic, I think I'm starting to get > the hang of it. TOM: [Daniel] It even comes with lubricant! MIKE: Tom... TOM: Sorry. ECHOWARRIOR(Daniel) But it still smells like a reactor. > Wreck-Gar: Hold on. CROW: [singing] To your love... > Magnus: Decepticons, we've got to draw them off and double back to > the shuttle. MARISSA: What makes you think those are Decepticons? ECHOWARRIOR: Kickback showed up... TOM: What about payoffs? ECHOWARRIOR: Kickback.. an insecticon that transforms into a grasshopper. > The Decepticons destroy the shuttle. > > Springer: There goes the shuttle. MIKE: Filmed in REDUNDANCY-VISION!! > Daniel: What do I do. CROW: Better run to Sears and pick up some punctuation marks. > Blurr: Transform,Transform,YouCanDoIt,IKnowYouCanDoIT,YouCanDoIt. TOM: He's like Torgo on amphetamines. > Daniel: Transform. > > Scavenger: Human Germ. MIKE: Ummm... salmonella? > Daniel: Transform, yeah, hehe. ECHOWARRIOR: AHHH a Junior Beavis! TOM: [Butthead] This movie sucks! > Magnus: Make a break for cover, I'll try and unleash the power of > the Matrix. > All Autobots: Till all are one! CROW: Seig Heil! > Magnus: Till all are one.*Trying to open the Matrix*Open, damn it open, MIKE: [Magnus] Dammit! Somoene put glue in the lock!! > Prime, you said the Matrix would light our darkest hour. TOM: [Magnus] You're a big fat stinking lousy liar, that's what you are! OSCAR [Prime]: BTW I think Grimlock should have gotten it! CROW: Please! Grimlock couldn't run a microwave! GRIMLOCK: ME GRIMLOCK CAN!!!! *walks away* > Galvatron: Magnus, I want the Matrix. > Magnus: Never! TOM: [Galvatron] Then I'll take your integral tables! MIKE: [Magnus] NOOO! > Galvatron: Sweeps, terminate him! > Scourge and his sweeps blast Ultra Magnus to little bits 8) CROW: The hell is that? TOM: Maybe it's a Fraggle. > Magnus: Uhhh, uh *explodes* MIKE: [Magnus] I guess I'm more indecisive than destroyed... > Galvatron: Die, die. *Catches Matrix* Unicron, my master, with this I > will make you my slave. > Shot of Unicron screaming or making some such noise. MARISSA [Unicron]: BURRRRRRRRPPP! TOM: TOGA!!! > Scene 18 > ======== > Inquisitor: Before his imperial magistrate delivers a verdict, would > you like to beg for your life, it sometimes helps, but not often. TOM: Also, it helps if you pledge to give him daily massages. > Kup: I can't transform. CROW: [Inquisitor] That's a shame... but you're supposed to beg for your life. > Hot Rod: Keep trying. > Judge: Silence, or you will be held in contempt of this court. > Hot Rod: I have nothing but contempt for this court. MIKE: [Judge] OK... you get 5 days in jail and a $100 fine. > Inquisitor: Guilty or innocent? > Judge: Innocent. TOM: [judge] In a guilty sort of way... > Hot Rod and Kup are dropped in with the Sharkticons. > Hot Rod: They've got more Sharkticons than we've got photon charges. CROW: They have about... five. > Kup: Then lets hold a demolition derby. > Hot Rod and Kup zoom round the tank of water they are in and > are soon out of the water zooming around amongst the Sharkticons > above. MIKE: [Yosemite Sam] I hates zoomers... TOM: IRC ref? MIKE: Yup. > Hot Rod: Haha, didn't even bend a fender. TOM: [Kup] Oh, but they smashed my grille! Damn! >Kup: Yeah, but look there's a lot more of those can diggin' grill > crackin' things. CROW: [Kup] What wit' their fancy electronic gizmos and such. Tarnation! >Hot Rod: We can't hold out forever, but we can give them one humongous > repair bill. MIKE: [Hot Rod] Huh huh huh... and we won't give them a payment plan either! ECHOWARRIOR(Hot Rod): Now where are the Dinobots? >Inquisitor: Execute them! > > Slag and the Dinobots knock the door down on the inquisitor. TOM: NOBODY expects the Transformer Inquistion!! >Slag: Excuse me. MIKE: [Slag] Whew, cut a big one here... >Grimlock: Me Grimlock want to munch metal. OSCAR(Grimlock): Me Grimlock kick some @$$. CROW: Me Grimlock need ESL. MIKE: Crow... >Hot Rod: Haha, I never thought I'd be so glad to see those bozo's. > >Grimlock: Me Grimlock no bozo, me king. TOM: ... of the ring? CROW: LET'S...GET... READY.. TO... RUUUUUUUMMMBBBLLLLEEEE!!! >Judge: Sharkticons, execute them! > Grimlock: *growls and stamps foot*Me Grimlock say execute them! MIKE: [judge, prissy] Excuse me, is your name "Sharkticons"? I didn't think so! > The Sharkticons transform think for a minute and then start > chasing after the Quintessons. TOM: The quintessential rebels! MARISSA: And the Quintessons put down the rebellion. >Kup: I think the problems on this planet will soon be solved very > shortly. > Hot Rod: Yeah but what about our problem, we need a ship. > Wheelie: You get ship, if I get trip. ECHOWARRIOR(Hot Rod): You want drugs? CROW: Crack or smack? > Hot Rod: Who are you? OSCAR [Wheelie]: Name's Wheelie let's make a dealie. TOM: [Chopper] *putt* *putt* What.. what about me? > Grimlock: Him Wheelie, him friend. > Hot Rod: He'll be mine too if he can find a ship. MIKE: [Hot Rod] Did I ask if I can find a ship? > Wheelie: Skip stare over there. CROW: [Wheelie] Skeet shoot over there too. > Kup: That's a ship? > Hot Rod: Who cares, as long as it flies. MARISSA [Hot Rod]: Hey the Omnibots and Powerdashers are in there! TOM: [Kup] No... that's just what they'd *expect* us to do. > Scene 19 > ======== CROW: Ninteen bottles of beer on the wall... 19 bottles of beer... if one of those bottles should happen to fall... 18 bottles of beer on the wall... MIKE: [whiny kid] Are we there yet? ALL: [sadly] NOOO!!! > The Autobots on Junk go up to the remains of Ultra Magnus. > Arcee: Ultra Magnus.. ECHOWARRIOR(Acree): Is dead..Let's party! OSCAR: That remembers me of my internet death... TOM: That reminds me too... [retches] > Blurr: WithoutTheMatrixThereIsNoHope,NoHope,NoHopeAtAll. > Arcee: First Prime, now Ultra Magnus. MARISSA: Well Ultra magnus was a white repaint of Optimus Prime... MIKE: I remember you saying that before... there must be some connection. CROW: Maybe they're the same. ECHOWARRIOR(sage-like and fanboyishly) Well Optimus Prime had 2 trailers when he was a DIAclone, one was the trailer one and other was combat armor..so they repainted him white and stick him with the second armor. > Daniel: Look! > Wreck-Gar: Don't look behind door number 2 Monty, it's time to play > end of the line my valentine, geronidoronronronronronnymo! TOM: Oookaoookaoookaoookaoookaa!!! MIKE: Beedybeedybeeybeedybeedy... CROW: Deanydididididyujanior Thinker! > A fight between the Junkions and the Autobots starts, with > the Junkions taking heavy damages but never staying down, > always recovering. CROW: But no matter what, we won't show it! > Springer: It's not hard to knock 'em down, it's getting them to stay > down that's the trick. MIKE: All those up-and-coming talk show hosts-- TOM: NO. > Arcee: They're indestructible. > Daniel: And they're everywhere. > Wreck-Gar: You check-in but you don't check-out. MIKE: [Wreck-gar] Take that, roaches!! > The fight continues until a shuttle starts to land. > Wreck-Gar: Steady as she goes bob, snappy visitors get mud in the eye > by and by. ALL: The hell? CROW: I haven't the foggiest... > Arcee: It's Hot Rod and Kup. ECHOWARRIOR(Acree): How the hell did they find us? > Daniel: And the Dinobots. > Hot Rod: Guns aren't exactly friendly. TOM: Just ask your local NRA member! > Kup: Neither are they incase you haven't noticed. MIKE: The Dinobots or the guns? CROW: How *not* to write a transcript... > Hot Rod: What was that universal greeting again, nevermind I remember. > Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. > Wreck-Gar: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. > Hot Rod: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. > All Junkions: Ba weep granna weep ninny bang. TOM: SHUT UP!! SHUT UP! Geez! MIKE: [Hot Rod] Hey, who are you calling a ninny? > The Junkions and Autobots starts dancing, including Perceptor, > and eventually a Junkion goes and kisses Grimlock on the nose. ALL: AWWWWWWW! > Grimlock: Me Grimlock not kisser, me Grimlock king. CROW: [Grimlock] Me Grimlock kisser of king's ass! TOM: Ick... OSCAR: Why does he call himself king? > Wreck-Gar: Have a nice day. We've (?) forsaking friends. Say the > Junkions > **(don't know if this line is correct, help?)** MIKE: Exqueeze me? TOM: I think I can help you with that line. It should read... "We have done nothing but mill around the f--" MIKE: [with his hand over TOM's mouth] We'll have none of that. TOM: It hurts, Mike! > Hot Rod: Where'd you learn to talk like that? > Wreck-Gar: TV, we talk TV, you talk some TV? > Kup: I talk some TV, and now the news, don't touch that dial. CROW: [head spinning] Beedy-beedy-beedy... MIKE: This is the first movie that could be compared to a tennis match. ECHOWARRIOR: I love this movie… > Wreck-Gar: By George, kimosavies your smashed up friend soon like > brand new with ninety day warranty. TOM: Kemosabe? > While Wreck-Gar is talking other Junkions come and put > Ultra Magnus back together again. CROW: [lightly hums the "Mr. Potato Head" theme song] > Wreck-Gar: Happy motoring, cocka-doodledooooo. > Daniel: Look he's alive. > Ultra Magnus: Your all alive. MIKE: [Ultra] Your all alive comes with a brand new 30 000 mile warranty! > Hot Rod: The Matrix? MARISSA [Ultra magnus]: It left to find Thunderwing. TOM: Voice mail says he'll be back around 8 or so... MARISSA: No..Nightbeat will have to harpoon Thunderwing.. > Ultra Magnus: It's gone. > Kup: And with it all hope. > Hot Rod: No. > Arcee: Galvatron has it. CROW: Oh, they're playing Hot Potato? MIKE: Don't you just have the urge to add description so that this actually becomes decipherable? > Hot Rod: Where's Galvatron, where is he? > Wreck-Gar: And the answer is, Unicron. TOM: [Alex Trebek] The question: > Hot Rod: Then we've got to destroy Unicron. MIKE: No, *really*? > Wreck-Gar: Yes, friends and now destroy Unicron, kill the grand poobah, > eliminate even the toughest stains. Offer (?), hurry hurry > hurry, sale must end, CROW: ... movie must end... > rush right on down and test drive latest > model with no obligation. New improved Junkion planet is sleek > sexy import with turbo handling. TOM: This is a great argument against the legalization of marijuana. OSCAR: No, this is what happens when robots watch too much TV. > Junkions: Destroy Unicron, kill the grand poobah, eliminate even the > toughest stains. MIKE: With Wisk!! > The Junkions and Autobots board the shuttles, which then > leave Junkion. CROW: And there was much rejoicing. TOM: Yay... > Scene 20 > ======== > Galvatron: Unicron, Unicron, answer me, see this, the Matrix, I > now possess that which you most fear, you will do my bidding > or taste my wrath. TOM: [Unicron] Allright, whatever, Snidely! > Unicron: You underestimate me Galvatron. For a time I had considered > sparing your wretched little planet Cybertron, but now you > shall witness it's dismemberment. CROW: [Unicron] I call this the "Benihana Maneuver". > Unicron starts to transform into a huge robot. ECHOWARRIOR [Barf from Spaceballs]: It's a transformer! > Galvatron: No!! ALL: Yes! > Shockwave: (As Unicron starts attacking Cybertron) Decepticons, > we're under attack, scramble. CROW: [random robot] Can I poach? > The 2 shuttles from Junk enter the area and see what's happening. > Hot Rod: Doesn't this remind you of anything Kup? OSCAR(Kup): Yeah Dark Nova. MIKE: [Kup] The great Alan Smithee book signing of 1972. > Kup: Nope, never seen anything like it before. > Daniel: what happened to moonbase 2? Where's my dad? MARISSA: Dead I hope. TOM: He can't die! This is an American kids' show. CROW: [Wilykit] He's not alive!! > Hot Rod: that's what we're going to find out. > Wreck-Gar: Resists fire rain and corrosion for up to 5 years, > satisfaction guaranteed. ECHOWARRIOR: But can it stand a fire breathing dark god? MIKE: If you buy the Deluxe model. > Junkions: Or your money back. TOM: This movie had commercial announcers in mind. You see it? It's a Commie plot, man! > The shuttle with Hot Rod, Kup, Arcee, Springer and Daniel in it > crashes through Unicron's eye, All jump out of it and Hot Rod > is separated from the others CROW: Them being fused together and all... MIKE: [Daniel] Oh, great... now we're Siamese quadruplets! > Daniel: Where's Hot Rod? > > Springer: I don't know, but lets hope they didn't get him. > > Arcee: Quick this way. TOM: [Arcee] I must... not... show any emotion. > Cut to Hot Rod who comes upon Galvatron with the Matrix. CROW: [Hot Rod] Taste hot algebra, punk! > Hot Rod: The Matrix. > All: Duh. > Galvatron: It will do you no good Autobot, it cannot be opened. MIKE: Duuuuuh... [twiddles lips] TOM: This movie was probably marketed for kids with Attention Deficit Disorder. > Hot Rod: Not by a Decepticon. OSCAR: Except Thunderwing. > Galvatron: Like it or not, we are allies now, against a common foe. MIKE: [Jimmy Carter] Malaise! > Unicron attacks Galvatron. > Unicron: Destroy him now Galvatron, or you yourself will be obliterated. CROW: [Galvatron] Same old, same old... big hammer hits little hammer... > Galvatron: Of course my master. Puny Autobot, you lack even > Primes courage. TOM: Well, that's not very good, since "Primes" doesn't exist. MIKE: [friendly announcer] Kids, apostrophes are our friends! > Shot of Grimlock and the Dinobots as they move in to > attack Unicron. TOM: THRILL as they attack Unicron... just take our word for it, they have a very stunning battle! ECHOWARRIOR: In the comics they do..it's a doublesized issue with Autobot and Decepticon vs. Unicron for the fate of the universe. TOM: Whatever… ECHOWARRIOR:*flings Tom across the theater* > Grimlock: Me Grimlock kick butt. (The attack fails to do much damage) CROW: Not surprising, since it was only one word. > Me Grimlock need new strategy. MIKE: [Grimlock] Me run away and wet 'em! > We now see Daniel and the other Autobots inside Unicron, bar > Hot Rod, TOM: Bar none? CROW: Bar none, this movie hurts. > being chased by some claws on the ends of moving vine > things. > Daniel: *falls* Help, help! MARISSA: Kill him! TOM: Out for blood, Missy? MARRISSA: Yup. > Arcee: Daniel! MIKE: [Arcee] What did I tell you about adopting damsel in distress clichés? ALL: [snicker] > Arcee and the other Autobots, who were running, turn round > and starts blasting to free Daniel, Arcee hits the wall and > water starts flooding the corridor, all are swept off with > Daniel being separated from the others. CROW: Sadly, Daniel was washed into the garbage disposal. The end. > Daniel: Arcee, Kup! > Daniel comes across an acid vat with bodies being dropped in. TOM: He's walked in on the Dateline NBC meat-packing exposé!! > Unknown: Arrrrrrrrgh MIKE: [Unknown] I can't believe I missed that question, it was right on the tip of my tongue!! > Daniel: Dad! > Spike: *about to be dropped in the acid* Daniel! TOM: [Spike] You have to do the last minute rescue! > Daniel: Dad, what can I do? CROW: [Spike] Be sure to get me a new coat, because I no longer have the annoyance of skin... > Spike: Knock down the acid cover! > Daniel: How? > Spike: Blast it son! ECHOWARRIOR(Daniel) With what? MIKE: [Daniel] Increase the temperature? OK! > Daniel: But I don't have a gun. > Spike: Use your exo-suit. Hurry!! TOM: Unfortunately, Daniel jumps into the acid vat, thinking that will stop it. They both die, the end. MIKE: Let's hang in here, guys. > Daniel fires knocking down the acid cover. > Spike: Daniel, you did it! CROW: [Spike] You crushed my torso! TOM: How do you know? CROW: Just guessing. > Daniel: Yeah, I did it. > We return to Galvatron to see him looking for Hot Rod. > Galvatron: Come out Autobot, we all must die someday. TOM: [Hot Rod, whiny] But I don't wanna die now!! > Hot Rod: Not today Galvatron. *smacks Galvatron in the face* OSCAR [Galvatron]: I'll rip out your optics! MIKE: [sarcastic] Their attacks are so diverse!! > Hot Rod transforms and zips away, Galvatron fires after him, > Hot Rod returns fire, Galvatron fires as Hot Rod charges, > Galvatron catches Hot Rod in his grasp. CROW: I am on the edge of my seat! Man, I feel like I'm *there*! > Galvatron: I will crush you with my bare hands, die Autobot. TOM: [Galvatron] I am going to kill you till you die from it! > Galvatron: First Prime, then Ultra Magnus, now you, it's a pity you > Autobots die so easily, else I might have a sense of > satisfaction now. MIKE: [Galvatron] See, smug evil villains like me die at the end of the movie... uh oh... > Hot Rod grasps the Matrix and Galvatron is flung off as > a transformation occurs to Hot Rod, becoming Rodimus Prime. CROW: Roderick? MARISSA: So reward for killing the last Prime.. > Optimus's voice: Arise Rodimus Prime. ECHOWARRIOR [Optimus Prime]: And don't think for a second I'm not coming back. > Rodimus: Optimus. MIEK: [Galvatron] I thought you were dead! TOM: [Optimus] Ummm... I got better. ECHOWARRIOR: He always does. > Galvatron: No! *Shoots the Matrix out of Rodimus's hands.* > Rodimus: This is the end of the road Galvatron. ALL: ...and the movie. > Rodimus Prime picks Galvatron up and simply throws him out of > Unicron into space. CROW: WHAT? > Rodimus: *Opening the Matrix* Now light our darkest hour. ECHOWARIOR: YOU got the touch! MIKE: Philips: Bringing you the best in light bulbs. > Unicron starts to blow up, ripping himself apart and simply > exploding. Spike, plus Jazz Bumblebee and Cliffjumper run > into where Springer and the others are. > Springer: Spike, Daniel. TOM: Muffy, Yanni, Holly... > Spike: Springer, what's going on? > Springer: no time to answer that now, lets get outta here. CROW: [Spike] But we're the good guys! We don't have to rush! We can't die! > The Autobots start running for any way out when Daniel > spots Rodimus Prime running towards them. > Daniel: Look. MIKE: [Daniel] The transcriptor actually added some action! > Rodimus: Autobots, transform and roll out. ECHOWARRIOR: Cool..... MIKE: Yeah, right. > Kup: I knew you had potential lad. OSCAR [Rodimus Prime]: Yeah right... TOM: [Kup] I just had to wait for the right time to say so. > The Autobots depart through Unicron's intact eye just as he > starts his final destruction. CROW: You know, people could compare this to the Death Star destruction in "Star Wars"... in that this one totally sucks. MIKE & TOM: Yeah, I hear you. ECHOWARRIOR: *shatters Tom's Dome, powerbombs Mike and rips Crow's head off* MARISSA: And people call me antisocial. MIKE: Oy vey... [begins to repair the BOTS] > Unicron: Destiny..you cannot destroy..my destinyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy > Unicron is finally destroyed. MARISSA: Incredible... TOM: [singing] But the movie goes on and on, my friends... > Scene 21 > ======== > A scene on Cybertron, all the Autobots are assembled, with > Wheelie and Wreck-Gar(probably the other Junkions too) CROW: Don't forget the Teletubbies too! > Rodimus: Let this mark the end of the Cybertronian wars as we > march forward to a new age of peace and happiness. Till all > are one! ECHOWARRIOR(Rodimus Prime): Now let's get the decepticons off Cybertron! CROW: [starts to say something] MIKE: NO. > All assembled: Till all are one! > Till all are one! > Till all are one! ALL: [singing] For he's a jolly good fellow!! > > Voice over: The battle is over, but the galaxy spanning adventures of > the Transformers will continue, and the greatest Autobot of > them all, Optimus Prime, will return. MIKE: [announcer] You hear that, kids? Buy our merchandise! NOW!! OSCAR (Optimus Prime): It never ends. TOM: Yeah, I'll say... > THE END ALL: YEAAAH!!! [credits roll] OSCAR: Let's go! (SOAP bridge) (Crow, Tom and Mike are in the transporter) ECHOWARRIOR: Goodbye ..*beams them back to SoL* MARISSA: That was interesting..we have to do that some more…like SON..or Hetai Space…*grins* OSCAR: Oh that will be fun…. ECHOWARRIOR: Yep it will be….. (fade to black with Oscar, Marissa and Echowarrior laughing)